Chapter 18 tears

It was a pair of teary eyes, red and swollen teary eyes. Those were not my eyes. At this moment, there were no tears in my eyes, only black blood. That should be my mother's teary eye. I knew that if my mother knew what had happened to me, her tears would be flying in the rainy May sky. Mother and grandmother are kind-hearted rural women. She is a child bride-in-law, and she has lived with her grandmother and father since she was a child.Therefore, I was also deeply influenced by my grandmother who was kind and generous, and I also believed in Buddhism. My mother gave birth to our four sons and brought up two adopted daughters.The family burden has always been heavy.She and her father made a little money by making tofu and brought us up.At that time, making tofu was very hard. Every evening, when my mother came back from working in the production team, she had to carry more than ten loads of water into the big wooden barrel in the tofu room for backup.Every morning at three o'clock in the morning, she would get up with her father to grind tofu. It was a large stone mill weighing dozens of kilograms. It took more than two hours to grind a pot of tofu... until after six o'clock in the morning, the tofu was not ready.My father would go to rest for a while, while my mother would carry a load of tofu and sell it from door to door until after eight o'clock. When I returned home, I would eat a bowl of porridge or a sweet potato, and then I would go to the fields to work with the members of the production team.

There is a scene that will always be imprinted in my mind-it was a rainy morning, and I went to school with my schoolbag and an oil-paper umbrella.When I walked into an alley, I saw the back of my mother. She was wearing a bamboo hat, carrying a load of tofu, barefoot, and shouting as she walked: "Sell tofu—" There were only us, mother and son, in the alley. Walking in tandem.I found that my mother's trousers were soaked by rain, and her big feet stepped on the cobblestone road, splashing water in pieces... At that time, it was illegal to sell tofu, and it was called "speculation", so I dare not disclose it.People from the commune city management committee found out, confiscated things, and arrested Youdou.Although my mother was not arrested for swimming and fighting, the tofu shop at home was ransacked, the tools for making tofu were confiscated by the vicious city management committee, and the cauldron for making tofu was also leaked.The angry father grabbed the long poker and wanted to rush up to fight them, but the mother hugged him and said to him, "Let's start all over again!"

I saw what tenacity is from my mother. She always bears everything silently and uses actions to resist man-made and natural disasters.I remember that year when the flood destroyed the house, I cried.She said to me blankly: "Why are you crying? The house can be rebuilt if it collapses, as long as the person is still there!" But my mother still sheds tears, and sheds more than the average person, that is when relatives are hurt.After her grandmother died, she cried for three days and three nights. She almost went blind from crying, and suffered from eye disease, which took a long time to recover.My younger sister Fu Lian is my mother's adopted daughter, and she was just a month old when she was adopted.When she was less than three years old, she got a serious illness, and her mother shed tears every day.The younger sister's disease required frequent blood transfusions. The mother transfused her own blood to the younger sister again and again, and finally broke down her own body.

... Ever since that big flood, I always hoped that I could build a new building for my parents so that they could live happily and comfortably.But I have never realized this dream. It was not until last year when I sent a large amount of manuscript fees home that I felt that this dream was about to come true.The construction of the new building started last winter, but I don't know why it was built so slowly, and it hasn't been built yet.Originally, I thought it would be completed in the Spring Festival of 2009, and I would take my wife and children back to celebrate the reunion year with my parents.Now, the wish to go home and spend the New Year in the new building may become a dream that I will never be able to realize.

Or my soul will float back to my hometown. ... Somehow, I sensed my mother knowing I was buried, felt her crying, her tears raining down from the leaden May sky. It was raining in my heart too. icy rain. Mom, I don't want you to cry, even if I die, don't cry.If you cry blind, you can't see your other sons and grandchildren. They are as important as me, as dear to you, and you see them as you see me.I hope you and your father can live well together. The house my son built for you hasn’t been finished yet. You can live well in the new house for many, many years. In the next life, I will still be your son and make money to build a new building for you. Live, let you enjoy your old age...