Chapter 7 Section VII

Zhang Jiaming said, "I didn't know you were sick." I look at him.Ah, it's me who doesn't live up to it. I'm also a child. His son has such a bright future. I'm cheating myself, and I can't blame others. My parents have always been kind to me, and there is nothing in arrears. "What about your job?" he asked. "Resigned." "This place is so big, do you live alone?" "yes." "Do you like living in a big house?" "This house is not big at all," I robbed him, "My family is not in debt to your family, so you don't need to worry about it."

He thought for a while before he figured it out, blushed, and said, "I didn't mean that, Ms. Zhao, I mean, if you don't live in a big house by yourself, live in a dormitory, and have classmates to take care of you when you're sick—forget it, I'm leaving, I'm bothering you." I think I'm too rude. A dog bites Lu Dongbin. He doesn't know a good heart. He came to see me like this because he was entrusted by a loyal person. I didn't offer him a cup of tea, but took it out on him. What should I do? I am the most unpromising person. Not only do I dare not blame the person who harmed me, but I also blame myself, but I use irrelevant others to attack.

Zhang Jiaming put on his coat silently, walked to the door, turned his head, and wanted to say something, I jumped up and walked in front of him, I was trembling, and for some reason, tears flowed down my face. He looked at me silently, classically, but a little blankly. People all over the world looked at me blankly, and as soon as my feet went limp, I fell to my knees in front of him. When I woke up, Zhang Jiaming didn't leave, but Peter and the doctor were beside me.I lie in bed. The doctor roared: "Hospital stay! The patient must eat!" I close my eyes again. Peter sent the doctor away.

Zhang Jiaming asked me gently: "Is that your foreign boyfriend?" He asked sincerely, with all his own boyish innocence. I shake my head. "He likes you very much, he was so anxious just now." He said. "No, he's not my boyfriend." He looked at his watch, "Joe, I'm leaving. I'll come see you tomorrow. If you go into the hospital, leave a note at the door. If I know you're sick, I won't ask anyone else out. I'll come back tomorrow." "Mr. Zhang, thank you." I said. "You are a girl in a foreign country—everyone takes care of you."

"Just now—I'm sorry." "I forgot." He smiled. he's gone. Peter asked, "Is he your boyfriend? Visiting you from home?" I laughed, but they were a couple, asking the same question. "He is amazingly beautiful. I have never seen such a beautiful Chinese. People say that Chinese people are short. He is a little taller than me. People say that Chinese people have small eyes. His eyes—" "Go after him, he is so beautiful." I said. "Don't make fun of him, he's really handsome," said Peter. I rolled my eyes at him, "If you continue talking, I'll take it as if you have a problem."

Peter said, "I'm not afraid of the villain who lied to you, I'm afraid of him. Is he really your boyfriend?" His tone was very sour. "It's the first time I've seen him," I said. Peter breathed a sigh of relief, he was really a child. "Besides, how many Chinese people have you met? How can he be considered beautiful?" I said, "I'm so ignorant." "Any girl would think he's pretty," Peter pointed out. "You think he is beautiful, you go after him." I said, "I don't care." He smiled and said, "I just want you not to be rare."

I really gave him a blank look, and sighed secretly in my heart. It’s okay, I have to move out until the end of the month, it’s too expensive here; I’m an adult, I can’t depend on my family for the rest of my life, my family has nothing to say to me, it’s me who is sorry to my family. However, this dream wakes up so quickly, anyway, it's better to wake up early.Thinking of Bill Nafein, my heart feels suffocated, as if I swallowed boiled eggs in a hurry when I was a child, and choked in my throat, and I couldn't breathe for a while, as if I was about to suffocate. He never came back, nor did he call.

I didn't go to him, he doesn't want to see me, I will never force him.I am not seventeen or eighteen years old this year. I am responsible for what I have done. I don't know what Zhang Jiaming said to my mother on the phone. I believe it will not be a good thing: I live in a big house alone, I am sick, I don't have a job, and there are foreigners in the house. Twelve gold medals are coming soon. It’s better to go back, so as not to suffer here piecemeal. After I go back, even if Bill Nafein wants to find me, he can’t find me (do I go back, so he can’t find me?), no matter how ugly his parents’ faces are. Also parents.

When Zhang Jiaming came to see me for the second time, I was lying on the sofa watching TV with bread in my mouth. I opened the door for him, and he childishly handed over a bouquet of chrysanthemums. "How are you?" he asked. I nod. "I left in a hurry that day, sorry, did your boyfriend take offense?" he asked. "That foreigner is not my boyfriend." I said angrily. "Oh." "Tea? Coffee?" I asked. "Coffee is ready, black," he said. "Thank you." I asked him while making coffee: "What did you say to your 'Aunt Zhao'?"

"Ah, it's nothing. I said you're fine. It's only because the rent is high that you spend a lot of money." He paused, "Aunt Zhao said that's all right, and then asked how you are. I said you are healthy. Also ideal." I looked at him, "Why are you lying?" I asked. He said slowly: "Sooner or later you will find a job, as long as you are willing to do it. Who doesn't suffer from ailments?" "Isn't he cured now? Telling the family every detail that they are eight or nine thousand miles away and there is nothing they can do to help them is in vain to make them worry." He said.

He spoke calmly and very rationally, and my nose suddenly became sour. Everyone is rational, except for me, who still feels smelly when he goes into a dead end. I gave him the coffee and put the flowers in the bottle. I said, "It's not a problem if the house is big. I'll move to a smaller one next month, and I don't plan to live here anymore." He said, "There are three rooms, and if you don't mind sharing with other girls, I have some relatives who are girls—" "I don't fit in," I said. He suddenly said: "You don't associate with people at all, how do you know you don't fit in?" As soon as I stayed, he taught me a lesson. "Can I invite you to dinner tonight?" he asked. I nodded and I looked at him and he smiled. In fact, he is a young and mature person, but because his face is so delicate and beautiful, especially the two short thick eyebrows, people always think he is like a child. Invite me to dinner, how long has no one invited me to dinner. The last time he went out was three weeks ago, at the invitation of Bill Navan. I changed clothes and went out with him.I walked behind him and sat in his car, but I didn't feel good in my heart. I was always silent, unhappy, and in a daze. My heart was full of Bill Navan. This guy took me to dinner at the Playboy Club, the foreign food was sloppy and I didn't appreciate it at all, but I thanked him politely and said I had a good time, and he just smiled. There is a bit of wisdom in his eyes - men are very complicated things, too complicated, he should be an interesting model, but unfortunately I am not free, I am having a headache with my own affairs. I'm a bit dull: I'm dull when I have something on my mind, I'm not active, I just want to go home and sleep, I don't know why I am so tired, as if I have no interest in this world at all. I try not to think about Bill Nafein, and his happy family. I respect his freedom, his choice. Since he didn't come to me, forget it. My apology to Zhang Jiaming is the same as to Peter.He spent so much money to invite me to dinner with such kindness, but I kept a straight face. I will never be happy again in my life, just like I don’t know which book said: "Even if the case is equal to the eyebrows, the intention will not be settled." All I want is Bill Navan, no matter how well I marry or meet the best man in the future, I will not be happy anywhere. Zhang Jiaming sent me home, and I said, "Jiaming, I have a dance party before I move, and invite all my friends, can you bring some people too? I want to make a mess of this house before I leave." He smiled. "Okay," he said. "Promise me to bring as many people as possible," I said. "Okay, I promise, at least half a dozen." He said. "Thank you." I said. I also asked Peter to bring many people.Peter laughed and said, "Don't be afraid, I won't talk nonsense. Unless you first admit that you are my girlfriend, I will never mention your name." Peter is really a good man. But there is still no news about Bill Navan, he is really a man who can say what he can do. it is good. I went out and bought a lot of wine and soda on Saturday night and came back. I pulled the sofa, lowered the lights, and started to prepare. I was busy making sandwiches and cakes. Peter helped me. "Is your Chinese boyfriend coming?" Peter asked. "He's coming to eat? Why don't you help? There are at least twenty or thirty people today." I said, "That's not my Chinese boyfriend." He smiled, "He's interested in you." "It's no wonder, he's a nice person, he'll take a fancy to me, the old birthday star is looking for arsenic to eat." "Are you arsenic? I eat arsenic for food." Peter laughed. "Stop talking nonsense." I frowned, "I only thought Chinese bastards were so glib and playful, take out that cake." But when the guests came, I was still busy, and there was no time to change clothes. After they drank tea and coffee, I had to wash the cups and take out more. I was relieved when they were dancing. Zhang Jiaming brought three pairs by himself, including seven for himself, and pushed a box towards me as soon as he came in. "Happy birthday," he said. "Damn it," I said, "it's not my birthday, it's a misunderstanding." He shrugged, "So happy to be misunderstood." He didn't care one bit. Peter was playing music, Zhang Jiaming saw him, blinked, and just about to speak, I immediately said: "He is not my boyfriend, I know what nonsense you are trying to say-hey, where is your own dance partner?" "Thank you for the gift," I continued. "What are you doing?" he asked. "And a little kitchen work," I replied. "Forget it, I'll make a sacrifice to help you." He said. "No, I dare not take it." I said, "Go and sit." He followed me into the kitchen. "Are you happier today?" he asked. I was startled, and immediately said, "I've always been very happy." "That's weird, don't lie," he warned me, "It seemed like someone owed you three hundred taels a few days ago." He looked at me. "You have sharp eyes." I said, "Take this out and put it on the coffee table, thank you." I sent him to do something. He turned around and came back. "Have you found a job?" "Take these cups out and put them away. Don't break them. No, I haven't started looking for them yet. I'm not in a hurry." He went out, but I felt that there were not enough plates. It seemed that there was a stack of porcelain plates hidden somewhere before, so I squatted down and searched for a long time. I heard footsteps behind me. I thought Jia Ming had come, so I said in Chinese: "Did you see sandwiches and other snacks? I'll trouble you later, but I don't have enough plates. Don't worry, I'll find a job." He doesn't answer. I turned my head and froze. Bill Navan. I must have read it wrong. This is the result of day and night thinking, and I thought sadly: I am out of my mind. Navan came over.I was still squatting on the ground, and he stretched out his hand to help me up. "You've lost weight," he said. It was him. All of a sudden, I couldn't hear anything, the music in the living room, the cars on the street, I could only see and hear him.It took me a while to recover, and I lowered my head. I said: "I have a cold." The voice was very weak. "You're having a dance?" he asked. "They say you're in the kitchen, and it's hot." "Yes." I said simply. What is he here for? I suddenly thought of the five hundred pounds.He came for money?No, no, it's definitely not for this. I have to pay him back the money sooner or later, but I still said it. I said, "You deposited the money into my account, right? I have to pay it back to you." Suddenly he said quickly, "Joe, I'm divorced." The plate in my hand fell to the floor and broke. Zhang Jiaming just walked in, "God!" He laughed, "I just said that there are not enough dishes, and I smashed a few more, what should I do?" I stood there blankly, and Jiaming looked at Bill Navan, who said, "I'm sorry," and withdrew. I turned my head slowly, "Divorced?" "If I hadn't divorced, I would never have come to see you. We can't drag on like before. It's not good for anyone." He said calmly. I asked, "Why did you tell me? Does it have anything to do with me?" "I know you're upset, Jo, but—" "I'm not unhappy, why should I be unhappy? Since someone suddenly called and asked me to listen carefully, saying that he would never see me again, I naturally listened carefully. You are my professor, and I won't listen to you. Who else do you listen to? So I really don't understand why you are here this time." "Joe, I'm sorry, Joe." "It's nothing, it's nothing," I said. "You see, I'm still the same. I should change clothes. I'm the hostess." He reached over and just touched the scar over my eye.In the past, he always said that it was "his" scar, and I couldn't bear it anymore, tears streaming down my face, I looked up at him, and I saw his apologetic face in my tears, what else could I say. He hugged me. "Joe, let's get married. I've always dreamed of marrying you, Joe, we're together and there's nothing more to it." I have been crying, gradually changing from whimpering to howling, for three weeks, and I have not seen him for three weeks. "I love you." I said. I kept saying, "I love you." He sat me down and wiped my tears with a handkerchief. I told him, "If you are late, you won't be able to find me. My family refused to send money, saying I was a waste, so I had to move." "No need to move, I'll pay the rent." "But--" "No but." "I don't think you will come again. I want to go home so that you will never find me, so that you will regret it forever." "You know very well that I will regret it for the rest of my life." "Bill," I said, "don't call like that again, promise me." "Never." I want to ask dozens of questions, but I can't ask them. He said slowly: "My wife hired a private detective, you understand? She waited for me to go back and put all the evidence in front of me. She asked me not to see you again, and I also think it's best not to see you for the time being." ..." "You didn't say 'for now', you said 'I won't see you later'." "Sorry." "Please go on." "I really didn't want to see you again. I really did you harm. I involved you in this disgraceful thing. A week passed, and two weeks passed. I couldn't help it. I knew what I should do. I told her she was very upset but I love you and I asked for a divorce." I asked, "Did she do anything to you?" "No, she's a nice person. She was silent for a long time. She only asked one question." "what is the problem?" "She asked: 'Our seventeen years are older, can't we compare with her?'" I looked at him tremblingly. He rested his head on his hands and continued, "I don't know how to answer, so I had to tell the truth. I said, 'I'm so sad not to see you and the child, but I can't bear not to see her.'" She separated Said for a long time that she didn't understand, but she agreed to divorce." I bowed my head, I finally broke up their family, should I be happy?Should I be congratulated for my victory?But I wasn't very happy. I am a mean person. Mrs. Navan said: Our seventeen years... Maybe I don't have to worry about this. Seventeen years later, he is an old man who can't even walk. Even if he leaves, it's just me leaving him, not him leaving me. Just for this little sense of security?No no, I love him. I love him. He sighed and said: "Now..." He changed his words suddenly, "Are you happier now?" He looked at me. I asked back, "Are you happy?" "I'm a little bit glad that at least it's sorted out," he said. I said, "If you're happy, I'm happy too." He let out another breath.If I don't ring, he may not be happy. Once the living habits of seventeen years are changed, how long will it take him to get used to it?I'll make him think it's worth it?He won't regret it in the future?A litany of questions. He put his hand on my shoulder and I didn't ring.The road ahead will not be easy, I understand very well.I'm finally with him.It is said that it should be a carnival.But at this moment, there seems to be a piece of lead in my heart.In the past, he was someone else's husband, and the responsibility rested entirely on others. I just borrowed him, but now he is here as a whole. Not only his smiling face and happiness are mine, but even his troubled and sad faces are mine.But it was my destiny to be with him. I will do my best. "Where will you live?" I asked a very realistic question. He asked me what I meant, he could move out, or he could come to me.He has to support two families. The original house has to be handed over to his wife, and he has to give his children living expenses every month.In other words, he paid a high price to be a bachelor again, but he still got divorced. For me, I should be grateful to him. He is a man who knows how to control his emotions, and after a while he began to recover his chic. He said: "You will listen to me in the future." His voice was so gentle. "Oh, absolutely, yes, sir." he laughed. (It's still worth it.) When we went out, all the guests in the house had left.The owner was not present, and everyone was having a good time. I could tell that there were wine glasses and bottles in the living room, cigarette ashes, fruit peels, sofas stretched all over the place, cushions everywhere, and the kitchen was even more chaotic, with endless food piled up. Mess. He laughed and said, "It's really lively." I laughed, "If I knew I wouldn't move, I wouldn't engage in this kind of thing. How can I clean it up now?" He turned to look at me, "If you know that I won't come, will you have a dance? Are you...interested in playing?" That's exactly like a jealous husband. I looked at him in amazement, I couldn't believe he was asking me that.Doesn't he know that I've been in bed for almost two weeks because of him?I can't even continue working for him, he has no confidence in himself. Ah, he was alone too. I relented that he sacrificed so much for me just because he was human. He is a professor, he is a vice-principal, he is my idol, but he is also a person. When he hesitates, I hold his hand. He is always afraid that choosing me is wrong, and he has doubts about me. . He asked again: "Who is that boy? You called him Peter. Who is the other one? He seems to be Chinese. You said you don't know any Chinese here." I do this for him, but he still doesn't believe me.Ask me how to explain.I'm not a person who likes to explain, do you want me to explain everything after he left?If he really loves me, he can't worry about gains and losses, he can't ask me to make up for his losses, and he can't doubt me. I stay there. "You're tired," he said. I shake my head. "I'm very tired and want to lie down for a while." He went upstairs. I didn't go up with him, and started to tidy things downstairs, wash the cups and saucers, and wipe the water stains. By the time I put everything away, it was already dawn.I vacuum the carpet. I sat on the couch smoking and drinking milk. I said to myself: Joe, the days with him used to be a vacation, but now it's back to reality.I should be more careful about my life. Now he divorced me for me, and the person who came to my side is just a person. His mental burden and financial burden are not so heavy. No wonder he is a little annoyed with me. I ran my hands through my hair, got up and opened all the windows to let the air in, and went upstairs slowly.He is not in the room.I went to look for him in the study and found him asleep in the easy chair, his coat wrinkled and set aside, his tie loosened, he was really tired. I knelt down to look at his face, his gray hair at the temples, and his strong hands on his chest.I finally got him. I didn't wake him up, it was warm enough in the study, he wouldn't catch a cold, I went to take a shower, changed my pajamas, I couldn't hold it anymore, fell asleep on the bed, I slept very well, never had it been so good where. The phone rang and woke me up. I picked up the receiver, and it took me a few seconds to wake up. I looked at the clock, it was half past one in the afternoon, and then suddenly remembered that Bill was here. I jumped up from the bed, and I smelled the aroma of his shredded tobacco. I was relieved. "Hello" several times on the phone.I said: "Which one?" "Zhang Jiaming. Hey, Joe, you are so capable. How can you sneak away as the master? You made me busy all night and greeted your friends. You are so kind! I punish you for dinner." Tone down, I laughed.He didn't really want to punish me.He just wanted to find an excuse for me to meet him, but, but I only love one person. I said: "Okay, I invite you to dinner. You come to my place tonight, and I will cook for you in the kitchen. But there is another friend." "I'll be there on time at seven o'clock in the afternoon, just don't poison me to death. Ah, by the way, your foreign boyfriend—is his name Peter? He said you are famously emotional, and told me to be careful." "He's not my boyfriend." "See you tonight." "Goodbye." I said putting down the phone. I ran out of the room: "Bill, Bill?" He turned out, bit his pipe, and smiled, "Here." I breathed a sigh of relief, "Where did I think you were?" "From now on, long companion dressing table, even if you drive me away, I have nowhere to go." I laughed. "I talked to my boyfriend on the phone as soon as I woke up, and I also spoke Chinese," he said. I could only laugh, "My boyfriend is here for dinner tonight, and I'll introduce you." He raised his eyebrows, "Is he really coming?" "Of course," I said, "I'm not afraid, are you?" "What will he think? Joe, in a little while the whole world will know you're with me," he said. "This is my trouble, it has nothing to do with you." I kissed Nafan. "You are so stubborn, why bother?" He put his hand on my shoulder. "Don't worry about it, now you are my lover, not my teacher anymore." I laughed. "When is he coming?" he asked. "Seven o'clock," I said. He said: "I have class at 2:30 until after 5:00, I will try my best to come back!" He smiled, "Of course I will come back, how can I rest assured that you are with other men, especially young boys !" I laughed and said, "It's not true! Who would dare to touch someone like me? Except you, you are so brave." "I watched you grow up," he said. After he left, I went to a nearby market to buy a lot of food and fruits. I don’t know how to cook, but the food I make can still be eaten. Not enough salt, but this time I made beef clear soup and tried my best to season it, but it was too salty. After three hours of fussing around, I finally made three dishes and one soup, a combination of Chinese and Western. I just sat down and made a cup of coffee to relax. Zhang Jiaming came first. He rang the bell, and I opened the door for him. He bought a lot of flowers. "You're early." I said. "It's not early, a quarter past six, because the traffic is not crowded, so it's a little early."