Chapter 6 memories that can never be erased

memories that will never be erased (1) I saw that faint mark on the bed sheet is still there, it is a memory that will never be erased, I have no regrets, no matter how crazy I am, I will not regret it. I said in my heart: Zhang Yang, dear, I'm sorry, come on, I won't listen to you this time. When Xu Yi saw me again, I was eating an ice cream on the street. Recently, I always want to eat something inexplicably, sometimes it is a bowl of soy milk, sometimes it is a cake, and sometimes I suddenly want to eat melon seeds. On this day, I want to eat ice cream. I stood on the street in winter with the five-color ice cream, eating it with gusto.

Xu Yi came up behind me and said, "It's such a cold day, you should pay attention to your body." I was taken aback and turned around to see him. He was wearing an exaggerated cotton coat, jeans, and no schoolbag.There are a lot of bloodshot eyes, thin. I pretended to be relaxed and smiled and said, "Son, the final exam is coming, you can't skip class." "What's the difference?" Xu Yi said, "It's the same whether you escape or not." I turned the ice cream upside down: "Don't give up on yourself, forget the past, and start all over again." The juice of the ice cream dripped drop by drop on the ground, like sticky tears.

"I want to know why?" He said stubbornly, "If you love someone, how can you just forget it and forget it? Where did your madness go?" "I don't care." "Nonsense!" He scolded me with bloodshot eyes. I smiled, raised my head, took the remaining ice cream into my mouth, made a BYEBYE gesture to him, and strode forward. He was downcast: "I can't forget you!" I made up my mind and continued to move forward.He did not follow.When I passed the corner of the street, I couldn't help but look back at him. He stood alone on the street in winter, looking heavy and lonely, with a kind of despair that he didn't dare to express.The loose cotton coat was his wings that could not fly.

At this moment, I received a short message from Zhang Yang. He said: I will wait for you at the old place. I looked at my watch, it was close to six o'clock in the evening, dusk had come, the winter sky was getting dark quickly, and when I arrived at the "old place", the curtain had completely fallen.I saw him leaning there, not smoking but playing with his phone.Hearing my footsteps, he raised his head and made a greeting gesture to me. "Which sister are you texting with?" I approached him, trying to check his cell phone. He didn't take the phone away, and I found that it was a new phone, Samsung, new, very stylish.

I pulled up the windbreaker, leaned against him, and whispered, "We haven't seen each other for half a month, honey, why don't you come to my house when you're free?" "I have to study physics tonight, and I only have fifteen minutes." He pulled me over with one hand and began to kiss me.The other hand holds the phone and takes a picture of us kissing.My eyes caught what he was doing, and I started giggling. He released me a little bit, and ordered in a low voice: "Concentrate!" But I couldn't concentrate, and I started feeling uncontrollable nausea again.I pushed him away and squatted on the side of the road, trying not to spit it out.He also squatted down quickly and asked me: "What did you do? Haven't you done it yet?"

God bless, I feel better. I stood up and said casually, "It's okay, I just have a cold." He looked at me incredulously. I shouted loudly: "I said it's all right." "Li Bala." He pointed at me with his mobile phone, "If you dare to lie to me, do you know the consequences?" I leaned softly against the wall, smiled and said, "Are you going to kill me? I really hope you kill me." "Don't lie to me, I don't believe you now." He began to become agitated, "I warn you, you'd better not provoke me!" "What will happen if I get angry?" I also became angry because of his distrust, and said with a sneer, "I really want to try it out. Should I scold or hit me? Or tell me to break up?" ?”

He put his phone in his pocket, approached me, and squeezed my chin: "Do you know that what I hate most in my life is when others threaten me?" His eyes looked terrified, as if they were about to bleed. I wisely said nothing. I'm waiting for him to calm down. "Answer me, have you killed the child in your belly? Don't lie!" "No." I said. "Say it again, louder, I didn't hear you." "No!" I said loudly. "You crazy woman, what the hell are you trying to do?" He pushed me to the wall, and began to hit my body with his knees, one time, two times, three times... He seemed to use all his strength, and I was so hurt Unable to breathe, he forgot to scream, and could only open his mouth and bite his arm tightly.Just when I felt like I was about to faint, someone rushed out from nowhere and pushed Zhang Yang away.

I took a closer look, it was a small ear! After pushing Zhang Yang away, she stood in front of me with her arms outstretched, protecting me.I could clearly feel her fear, she was trembling, but she stood bravely in front of me, like a hen guarding her chicks, resolutely, not leaving. "Go away!" I yelled at Zhang Yang, I was really afraid that he would hurt my little ears. Seeing a stranger appearing, Zhang Yang began to feel scared, he backed up, stretched out a finger while backing up, and said in a low voice, "Try, I won't let you go if I don't get rid of it!" Then he He walked away without looking back.

I couldn't hold it anymore, I slid down the wall dejectedly, and knelt on the ground clutching my stomach. My little ears, oh thank you. That night, it was this girl named Little Ear, who should be quite unfamiliar, who sent me home.Her warm little hand held me and took me through this small town that made me sad and heartbroken, making me feel inexplicably stable. The pain was also strangely diluted by the warmth from her palm. That night, I knew her name, she was Li Er. Add a word "king" next to the ears of the ears. When she applied the medicine for me, I told her my secret, and I really couldn't help but want to talk to someone.In my heart, she has become someone to talk to.

memories that will never be erased (2) For so many years, the only one who can confide. I believe that she will not betray me.Moreover, even if she betrayed me, I am willing not to blame her.All the good things in my nature are infinitely activated by this little girl called Little Ears, making me more tender than in love. I can't describe this feeling, but it makes me feel happy, so I would like to enjoy it first. God behold, I am, how, lonely. That night, I watched her leave, such a weak and lovely little girl, I was worried that she would be afraid.But I really didn't have the energy to see her off again, she turned her head and smiled at me, that smile was as bright as starlight.I leaned against the door and blew a kiss to her. She blushed, put her hands together and placed them by her temples, and made a sleep gesture to signal me to go to bed early, then turned and walked away.I watched in a daze as her back quickly disappeared into the distance.

The old woman's game of cards ended strangely early today. She was holding a cup of tea, and she was also looking out, curiously asking me: "Is she in the sky?" I ignored her and went back to my room. I didn't expect Zhang Yang to come that night. It was twelve o'clock.I didn't fall asleep, there was movement at the window.I jumped up, opened the window, and saw him. We stood across a window, and the winter wind pierced through.I looked at him and didn't let him in, and he didn't move.Finally, I couldn't help asking: "Why are you here?" "I'm sorry." He bowed his head and admitted his mistake like a child. The subject felt his trembling and the fear in his heart, "No matter what happens in the future, you have to remember, I really love you, I love you the most, you are the only one who makes me happy Feeling girl." "Then, fine." I was defeated, "I'll go to the county hospital tomorrow to solve it." "I don't want to either." Zhang Yang said, "But we will have a second and a third child, and I will hold their hands with you and walk in the streets of Paris, give me time, and I will give you happiness. " "How long?" I asked him. "How long are you willing to wait for me?" He asked me slyly. "Forever." I said without hesitation.After I finished speaking, I was amused by my own rhetoric and giggled.He asked me nervously, "What are you laughing at?" I told the truth: "I laughed at myself as the kind of spineless woman I didn't like the most before!" He hugged me tightly.Cold feet pressed against mine.not talking. After a while, I found that he seemed to be asleep, and even snored lightly. Instead of waking him up to let him go, I set the alarm clock on my phone to six o'clock in the morning.I want him to wake up, and the first thing he sees is the person he loves most by his pillow. If only I were his favorite person. The person I love most in my life. This is a must. No. 102 bus, the terminal goes all the way to the hospital in the county. It's about an hour's drive from the city, and I've been here two years ago.That time, I accompanied a girlfriend of my cousin to come here for abortion.My cousin gave me 2,000 yuan and stuffed a twittering unlucky girl into my hand.The girl was a year younger than me, and she chewed gum nonchalantly along the way, telling me many boring details about her relationship with her cousin.Including how my cousin flirted with her, and fairy tales about how she washed my cousin's clothes and brushed his slippers on the terrace and almost fell off. Her fingernails are pointy, and she doesn't look like the kind of person who does things.And I also know that my cousin doesn't like her at all, maybe what he likes is just her youth and ignorance. The county hospital was filthy, and the nurses had very dull faces.I remember she entered the operating room chewing gum nonchalantly, and seemed to whistle softly, but when she came out, she was a completely different person, pale and unable to stand, I will never I will forget how she tightly grabbed my collar and said to me angrily: "I want to kill your cousin." Today, the old place is revisited. I came alone, I have no one's collar to pull, I only have myself. I also whistled loudly, and then walked towards the inside of the hospital. I clearly remember that the obstetrics and gynecology department is on the third floor. When I finished registering and walked to the second floor, a short message rang, and it turned out to be a small ear greeting me. After getting off the phone, she still spoke in such a soft voice, so timid that one couldn't help but want to rush to the other end of the phone to hug her.Just after talking to Xiao Er, the phone rang again, this time it was Zhang Yang.He must have been calling me on the school playground, and I could hear the wind whistling in his ears. "We are in gym class," he said, "I miss you, so I ran to the side to give you a call, it's cold today, you have to take care of yourself." "Well." I said. "Is it over?" "It's being done." "you alone?" "yes." The other side hesitated for a while and said, "That won't work, let's wait for two days. When I have a holiday, I will accompany you. You can't do it alone." "it's okay." memories that will never be erased (3) "If I say no, I won't do it!" Zhang Yang said, "To be honest, I'm in a panic today, and I'm always worried about what might happen. Come back quickly by car. I'll be on vacation for a week at most, and I can take it for a few days. Fake, let me go with you." "It's okay." I said, "It's all here, let's get rid of it, so you don't have to worry about it." "But if something happens to you, wouldn't I be more concerned?" Zhang Yang said, "Be obedient and come back." "Okay." I said. "I love you." He spit out three words on the phone.Then, he hung up the phone. I'm in a daze.Stuffing my phone into my jeans pocket, I stood on the stairs, not knowing whether to go up or down.Two nurses passed me. They glanced at me, at my beautiful pointed high-heeled shoes several times, at my strange curly hair several times, and finally passed by. I finally turned around and went downstairs. At that moment, I understood that even if Zhang Yang's call didn't come, I couldn't really make up my mind. What was in my stomach was my own treasure, the treasure shared by me and my beloved, and he had the right to come No one can murder this world, not even myself. It's just that love makes me soft-hearted for a while. I took No. 102 and returned the same way.When I passed the stop in Tianzhong, I couldn't help but jumped out of the car.I hid in a corner not far from the campus and watched. I originally wanted to see Zhang Yang, so I went up to surprise him, even if I didn't say hello.But I didn't wait for him, but I suddenly saw Little Ears. She was wearing a little pink padded jacket again, her face was still so rosy, so cute. She was walking home alone, a little lonely. I know that she regards me as a good friend, but at the gate of the sky, I don't have the courage to call her, I am a person who is full of troubles. /p>So I leaned in the corner and silently watched her go away. It was already the third day of the Lunar New Year when I saw Little Ear again. Zhang Yang went to his grandma’s house in Shanghai and asked me to wait for him to come back before accompanying me to the hospital.My spirit is better, I no longer want to sleep all day long, and I am in the mood to tell jokes. When I was "forget it" telling a joke with a little brother, I suddenly saw small ears, which surprised me a little. I don’t like it very much. She came to a place like this, so I dragged her out of it. But she mentioned to me...Xu Yi. This should be the second time. The last time, it was in a ramen restaurant, and my heart suddenly became enlightened.It seems that my little ear is a child who is struggling in secret love. In the sky, there are many such children who dare not love, hate, or even speak loudly.Those people have nothing to do with me, but I can't ignore the small ears. She told me that Xu Yi failed the final exam and hoped that I could help Xu Yi.I smiled at her, thinking the smell in my smile would make her feel uneasy, but she didn't, she begged me softly. I really couldn't stand her begging me, so I agreed to meet Xu Yi, but I asked her to find Xu Yi.She turned around and went looking for it.To be honest, I never thought that she would have the ability to really call Xu Yi. When I was singing the sad song I was familiar with on the stage, I saw Xu Yi. He ran in Yes, he doesn't have small ears in his eyes at all, he rushed up to me and asked me: "Is the matter between you and Zhang Yang true?" Finally something happened. I didn't deny it, and simply said: "Yes." Xu Yi grabbed me like a lunatic, looking like he was killing me. I saw my cousin at the counter snap his fingers, and several people surrounded me, and quickly pulled him away, facing him Just started punching and kicking.I wanted to stop it, but two people stopped me and pulled me all the way to the counter.I shouted to my cousin: "Don't hit him, just let him get out!" The cousin struck a match and said slowly: "This kid is looking for cigarettes all day long, so he can't do without beating." At this moment, I saw little ears, my brave little ears, she crazily jumped into the crowd, trying to protect Xu Yi with her thin body, I rushed over to grab her, but I didn't Pulling, I watched as a beer bottle hit her head with precision. Blood ran down her face. She may have been in pain or frightened, and she lay limply on the ground. I rushed forward and slapped the brat holding the broken beer bottle.I didn't think it was enough, so I threw another backhand! The bar finally quieted down. I bent down and hugged the little ear, she seemed completely unconscious.I shook her hard, and she opened her eyes and closed them again. Someone beside me said: "Come on, sister, don't shake her. She looks fine. I'll go find a doctor." "No need." I said coldly, "Send her to my house!" Xu Yi got up from the ground and looked at the girl lying in my arms. He didn't seem to recognize her, and he didn't quite understand why this girl would risk her life for him.I said to Xu Yi: "Go quickly, remember, her name is Li Er, she likes you, you are never allowed to bully her in the future, do you hear me?" "What the hell are you up to?" he asked me hoarsely. This unreasonable stupid pig!I no longer want to talk to him. I called the two boys to help the little ears up from the ground, and left "forget it". Little ear, I'm sorry, I was wrong, I shouldn't let you suffer any harm.In the car, I held her in my arms, and my heart ached so much that I would rather be the one who got hurt than her. God behold, what I say is really really true. Later, I saw a passage written by her on Xiao Er’s blog. She said that she wanted to become a bad girl, which made me overjoyed. As I said earlier, I am an inherently bad girl. Oh no, bad woman. During the winter vacation, I got sick.