Chapter 2 Chapter two

My mother murmured: "There are girls like this, who are not afraid of being exhausted when they are out in the wild all night." In fact, I am really happy. I have a daughter this year, and who wants her to stay at home all day long. I fell onto the sofa, couldn't hold it any longer, and fell asleep. Woke up early the next day, but not earlier than my mother.She is already at work.If the stewardess is too good at doing it, she will work on the ground, and if the ground service is too bad, she will work in the ticket office.That was probably how she knew Aussie Hamilton.Good for her.

I'm drinking milk and wondering what happened last night. I took a mirror and put it in front of me.Look, it's still the same face.What does Xu Cunzi fancy? And how old is he.Fifty?sixty?I didn't expect the age of an oriental man to be so difficult to guess-but why guess.For my pride.I haven't gotten to the point where I'm looking for a "sugar daddy" - but why not?My heart is up and down. This is unfair to Xu Cunzi.He is a very attractive man. Even if he didn't have money, I'd go out with him - just a date. Conghui's father... Xu Cunzi, Cunzi.A man's name has a word like that, why.I will ask him.I am not afraid of him.not at all.

It's not uncommon to date a girl.There must be many, many women in a man's life.There are many, many men in a woman's life. In the past, women could sit in the orchid boudoir and embroider flowers for a lifetime, but now this time has passed.Dating your girlfriend's father isn't anything outrageous, I'm pretty open. Staying at home until twelve o’clock, Xu Cunzi’s phone call came, and it was his female secretary who put up the line. His kind voice said, “Don’t forget we have a date at two o’clock.” I put down the phone, feeling very satisfied. Practical.It's like answering a long-distance call, and the cute boy said from eight thousand miles away: "I miss you." In fact, there is no practical help at all, and the salary is not increased by one point. I still have to get up at 7:30 the next day, but my heart suddenly After settling down, the trivial unhappiness in life disappeared, and a vague and ambiguous smile appeared on his face unconsciously, and he stepped on the nine layers of clouds all day long.

I was able to attract Xu Cunzi's date, this is probably the greatest achievement. Just as I was about to go out, my mother called and told this and that.I told her not to worry, just go get married freely, maybe I will buy a quilt embroidered with a picture of a hundred sons for her. She said my father wanted to see me.He notified his mother in writing. I was silent for a while, and I said, "I don't have time for him." "He's still your father anyway." "I have no warmth. My surname is Jiang, and Jiang is my mother's surname. " "Tell him yourself."

"No, you tell him," I said. "I don't want to have any contact with him," said my mother. "Me too," I said, "Send him to hell." "You tell him to go." Mom hung up the phone. I opened the door, and the phone rang again. It was Xu Congshu.He asked me if I remembered him. "Yes, I remember you," I smirked haha, "Of course I remember you. How are you?" I looked at my watch, I was already late, Xu Congshu's father was waiting for me downstairs. He hesitated for a moment and asked, "Are you free tonight?"

"I'm on my way out for an appointment right now." "Ah," he disappointed, "I'm sorry." "Can I call again tomorrow? Tomorrow at noon." I said, "I'm sorry, I really have to go out." "Thank you, bye." I dropped the phone. As expected, Xu Cunzi's car had already parked at the door. It was a black Mercedes, and he drove it himself. I opened the door, "Sorry, I'm late." "Ten minutes late is nothing to a girl." He asked gently, "I believe you have made many men wait longer than this time."

I smile.He starts the car. "Just out of interest, how long was the longest you waited?" "Ten years," I said. Xu Cunzi laughed.He had two very crooked and very sharp canines, he did not smile like an old man, and his charm was indescribable.I don't mind being with him. I didn't ask him where he was going, it didn't matter where he went. "Girls like red and yellow sports cars," he said. "I'm not the kind of little girl." I said carefully. "You can speak as freely as yesterday, without worrying that I am an old man." "Are you old?"

"Yes, old. My muscles have long been slack, my hair is gray, I can't do it anymore," he smiled easily, "The little girl is getting married—Chenghui is about your age?" "I'm older than her," I said. "But she's much more childish than you." "I said that she has the qualifications to be a naive person, but I don't." I simply said, "Smartness is not naive, she is just naive, I like her very much, she treats people with sincerity, she is like you, Mr. Xu, Xu Everyone in the family is doing well.” "Thank you." He smiled.

We fell silent. After a while Xu Cunzi asked, "Would you like to go to my other home for dinner?" "Another home?" I was slightly surprised. He blinked, "Sly Rabbit Three Caves." I smiled, "I would like to go on an adventure." It was a small first-floor apartment, in a high-end residential area, with simple decoration, clean and generous, and there was the ringing of children's bicycles under the shade of trees at the door.A man like him, of course, needs a place like this to meet his girlfriends and have a manservant to serve us wine and prepare food.Male servants are better at keeping secrets than female servants.

"Smart said you have a house in England." "Yes." He said casually. Unconvinced, "I bet you don't have a fort in Scotland." "You like Scottish forts?" He raised an eyebrow slightly. "Oh yes. Reminiscent of Macbeth Othello. Tragedy of tragedies. Pale, true. I don't like fairy-tale fortresses - and Cinderella lived happily ever after with Prince Quali - It's cloyingly sweet—I've said too much again." "No, please go on." "why?" He was opening a bottle of "Xiangbaidan" red wine by himself. He was startled when I asked him, and then said, "You are a lovely girl."

"Probably because you like talking about children," I laughed, "Why don't you talk to Conghui more?" He poured some wine into the glass and handed it to me, "Song Jiaming is smart, Fang Jiakai is smart. Congshu has countless girlfriends. My wife has her poker friends." I asked, "Your wife doesn't understand you?" I laughed. "It's strange," I leaned forward, "that all the wives don't know their husbands." Xu Cunzi stared at me for a while: "You are cruel, Miss Jiang." "I'm not that kind of person at all," I said, "I'm not sugar and spice." "At least you're honest." He sighed. I tasted the wine, it was fragrant, mellow and smooth, like velvet, I greedily sipped it in small sips. Xu Cunzi has been watching me, and I don't need to touch his eyes to know it.I am extremely happy. He suddenly asked me, "What do you want most in life?" "Love." "Huh?" He was a little surprised? "Loved and loved." I said, "Lots of love." "What is the second wish?" "Money," I said. "How much?" he asked. "enough." "How much is enough?" "Not much." I replied. "Is there anything else?" "healthy." "Practical," he said. I have always been a practical person with practical plans in mind.I can't be as romantic as Xu Conghui. "Eat some oysters," Xu Cunzi said. "Why is your name Cunzi?" I asked while eating, "Like a woman." He stared blankly, then said intently, "I've never been asked that question before." He looked at me. I shrugged. "It's nothing unusual. How dare someone in your company ask you, obviously you're not very close to your children. Your friends wouldn't ask such a silly question. Is this your real name?" "It's my real name." There was too much "oh you curious child" in his smile.I wipe my hands. "Your father named it for you?—Excuse my rudeness." "It's my grandfather." "It is very likely that when he was in the Imperial Academy of the Qing Dynasty, he had a crush on a lady with the character 'Zi' in her name, but he failed to marry her, so he named his grandson 'Cun Zi' - Zi is always in my heart. Novels often have Such a sad story." "But my grandfather is not Hanlin." He smiled, "He is a fortune teller, and he has nine children." "Really? How romantic. Divination, does it have something to do with you?" "I'm just a businessman, I don't understand." He replied. "What line of business does your father do?" I was even more curious. Xu Cunzi wiped his nose with his hand, "Yeah." "Sorry." "It doesn't matter, he is also a businessman." Xu Cunzi replied. "Self-taught or MBA?" I continued to ask, while drinking up a bottle of "Xiangbaidan". "He is self-taught, I go to Oxford." He replied. "Not bad." I said, "You know what? I've been to Oxford for a conference, and their toilets are for squatting, and the green bricks on both sides of the step are slightly dented, how horrible, you can imagine how many people have been there bathroom--" Xu Cunzi laughed while shaking his head.Everyone in Xu's family likes to laugh.The Xu family is really a happy family. The second course is fish.I concentrate on eating. Xu Cunzi said, "It's my turn to ask questions." I shook my head, "I won't answer any of your questions." "Why?" he said. "It's so unfair. Do you know how many questions you've been asked?" I still shake my head. "I'm an ordinary girl, I have nothing to say about my life experience, I'm sorry." He was taken aback. "It's okay." His demeanor was impeccable, "If you don't want to say it, don't say it." "thanks." Every once in a while, the male servant plays a record, the background music is so light that it cannot be heard.My appetite is so good that my skirt is already taut by dessert. Xu Cunzi said, "My son Congshu—he's very interesting to you." The accident made me look up, "Really?" "What do you think of him?" he asked. I cough lightly, "It's very quiet." Xu Cunzi smiled. "If he dated you, would you go out with him?" "I don't know, but if you ask me out again, I'll come out." He was stunned again, and then said slowly: "Are all girls nowadays as honest as you, Miss Jiang?" "I think so. Wisdom is also very straightforward. We have become good friends within three days. The time is too short. Who has the time to shoot grass for unnecessary waste." "Well said." Xu Cunzi nodded. "Miss Jiang, are you used to accepting gifts?" He asked suddenly. "Gift?" I didn't understand for a moment. He nodded slightly again. "I won't refuse—yeah, you're still asking about me." I laughed. "I won't answer any more questions." He himself took a gift box and handed it to me. I took it, put it in front of me, and looked at it, struggling with contradictions in my heart. Gift.Why give me a gift? Greeting ceremony?The elders meet the younger?Impossible, no matter how rich people are, they will not give gifts for no reason.Only a man who has a lot of money and is willing to spend it will give a gift when he meets a woman he likes. It doesn't need to say much about what it means. I propped my chin with my hand, looked at Xu Cunzi, and looked at the gift box.Must be jewellery.He went out to buy it in the morning.Very planned to send me something.Of course I can refuse right away.I sigh, but I'll regret it, what the hell is in the box? Reasonably rejected.Girls must have the self-esteem of girls, and girls in 1978 should also have self-esteem.Brightness is one thing, I don't want to be underestimated by anyone, informality is definitely not twelve points. I sighed, what an annoying red tape, how I wish I was still a child, and could grab everything. I said, "Mr. Xu, I can't accept it." "Why?" he asked. "You can't ask questions," I said. "Not even interested in taking a look?" He asked with a smile. "I'm afraid I'll have to accept it if I take a look at it." I said honestly. "Why is that?" He asked, "Why didn't you accept it?" "It's not time for gifts yet." "What is—the time to receive presents?" Xu Cunzi's piercing eyes looked straight into my eyes. My face flushed.The gift I received last time was from Hantai, because we have already lived together. Xu Cunzi said, "Miss Jiang, I hope you will listen to me attentively." "Okay." I said. Cunzi stood up, walked to the window, turned his back on me, these words must be hard to say, otherwise he could turn his face on me.For a person of his age, what has he not said, what has he not experienced, what is he going to say? "Miss Jiang, I am already an old man." What a fresh start. "There are many things that money cannot do." He went on. I listened in silence, turning the crystal glass this way and the other.What he wanted to say, I already have some points, very sad, why did he single me to say this?It doesn't mean that if my family is poor, I have to sell myself in a hurry. I put down the cup and raised my head, but he still had his back on me. "Yes," he continued, "I will not be stingy with what I can buy. Miss Jiang, I think I have no conditions to pursue you. I have nothing but money. I am already an old man. I am very frank and say nothing Say something, forgive me, I like you very much, if you want, how about we make a deal?" He finished speaking fluently. I unpacked the gift box, opened it, and there was a diamond ring inside.Not too big, not too small, very wearable, two to three carats, beautiful.I tried it on my finger, took it off again, put it back in the box, and put the box still on the table. I took my coat and went to open the door myself. Xu Cunzi turned around, and I looked at him, with my hands on the doorknob. I didn't know what to say, so I spread my hands. "I offended you?" he asked. I shake my head.Only the princess is eligible to be offended, who am I?I pulled the corner of my mouth and opened the door. "Miss Jiang—" he was a little anxious, "Miss Jiang." "I feel sorry for myself. Do I look like a whore?" I asked, "You look like a client? Neither of us are like that. Why did you expose the situation so badly?" He said, "I like you. I'm desperate to get you." He still smiled. "But I'm a human being, a woman. You can't buy a woman so quickly who isn't a whore. I might sell myself eventually, but not so quickly. That's the difference between people and things." I turned and walked out. "Miss Jiang." Xu Cunzi called me from behind. I have already left and stopped a streetcar on the street, he may think that I am retreating, whatever he thinks, I just sit in the taxi, and the car is heading home, my tuition fee for next year, I think , the tuition fee has not been paid.Cost of living.My mother is going to get married, and now I have only myself in this world.Just now Xu Cunzi gave me a chance.I thought bleakly that if I was going to live on this level, I would have to sell what I had for what I wanted.I absolutely don't want to go back to Hong Kong to rent an end room and work as a female secretary, and spend my whole life sitting in smelly public transport.This was my chance to get down, and not every woman gets that chance. I said to the taxi driver, "Turn the car back." "What?" the driver asked, turning around. "Go back," I said. "Where I got into the car." The driver is so impatient. "Hey, have you decided yet? Miss, which way are you going? You should think clearly." My tears came pouring out. "I've figured it out, please drive back." The driver saw me crying, but was at a loss, "Okay, drive back." He turned the car around, "Don't cry, okay? Miss, I'll listen to you." I will not blame the society, the society did not feel sorry for me, this is my own decision. When I got out of the car, I paid him a lot of small bills. The driver gave me a strange look, and then left, looking at me frequently in the rear-view mirror. I rang the doorbell and cleared my throat with a soft cough. It was Xu Cunzi himself who came to open the door.He was a little surprised. "Miss Jiang." "I'm back. I was upset just now because the stone on the ring was too small." I said calmly. "Miss Jiang, I'm sorry, you have to forgive me, because I have too little time due to my age, I am willing to take the normal pursuit route, but—" "I understand." I said, "but you underestimate yourself, Mr. Xu, you are not old, you are much better than me. I have nothing but youth." "Miss Jiang, thank you for coming back." He said with a smile. He was so calm, it infected me. "Do you have—what conditions?" Xu Cunzi asked me. "Yes. I want to study." I said simply. "Of course. You're at Trinity College, Cambridge," he said. "I'll send someone to look after you. I'll get you a flat in Cambridge—a housekeeper, a driver, a maid, and you don't have to worry about anything." "Thank you," I said. "And you? What are your conditions?" "Do you have a boyfriend?" he asked. "No." I said, "From now on, there will be none." "You'll be bored, and I won't object to your normal social life," he said. "I understand, Mr. Xu, you will find that my advantage is that I am more sensible than other girls." I said. "Are you going to be unhappy?" He wasn't completely unconcerned. I smiled, "I want to go for a walk in the street, are you free? Mr. Xu." I looked at him. "I have business in my company." He took out the check book, signed a name, and crossed the blank check to me. "Go to the jewelry store to buy another ring." "Thank you." I said, "Oh," I remembered, "Congshu asked me to meet him tomorrow, how can I push him?" Xu Cunzi was startled and stared at me. "You should know how to deal with him." I said, "But he's your son." "What difference does that make?" he asked. "Push him off." He paused. "Now you're mine." I looked up and laughed.This reminds me of Liang Shanbo saying to Zhu Yingtai: "...you, you are already a member of the Ma family..." I am already a member of Xu Cunzi. "I'll drive you out," Xu Cunzi said. "thanks." In the car, he said slowly: "I hope you will like me." "I've never 'disliked' you," I said. "Don't forget, in the garden, when I didn't know you were rich, it was I who hooked up and said to you." My eyes looked the road ahead. "I will remember." Xu Cunzi smiled. Since then, he never called me "Miss Jiang".From then on, I was his favorite.I didn't realize until this moment how appropriate this name is for me, as if I was destined to be this kind of woman from birth. "How about putting you down here? There are a lot of jewelry stores in this area," he said. I nodded and got out of the car.I said to him, "I won't buy too much." He smiled, "I knew it earlier." I walked leisurely into the jewelry store, and the clerks paid no attention.I secretly rejoiced in my heart, then sighed again, pinched the check in my hand, and put my hand in my pocket, a kind of mysterious joy, a dark and sinful joy, the left hand does not let the right know, and everything is traded in the dark.This is the first time I spent money happily, and I was so excited. I sit down. A male clerk came up to me.He asked: "Miss, what jewelry are you looking at?" He smiled.I probably thought I would buy a small K gold chicken heart with sesame-sized diamonds inlaid on the heart. I asked, "Do you have all-American baguettes of about ten carats in your store?" The voice was much calmer than I expected. The male clerk immediately changed his mind about me, but he was too embarrassed to make it too obvious.He replied: "I'm looking for our manager, miss, please wait a moment." I went to the manager's office to pick out diamonds.I don't know much about jewelry, and the one I chose was 9.75 carat.All American, well cut, but not blue enough in color.The manager said, "Miss Jiang, it's hard to be perfect for such a big diamond nowadays." "I don't believe it," I said. "I want to be perfect." The manager hesitated for a while and asked, "Miss Jiang, are you paying in cash?" I look up. "Do you still have twelve-year installments?" "Yes, yes." He must be calling me a bitch in his heart, "A customer ordered a baguette diamond, which is perfect, but smaller." "How big is it?" "Eight cards." "Too small." I said. "Then there is another one, also ordered by the customer, more than twelve cards." He stared. "Take it out and see." I said The manager sighed softly, and went to get the diamond. In comparison, the first one was like an egg yolk.I said: "Set this one up, the simpler the better." "Miss, the inlaid ring is too big for you, and your fingers are so thin, only size five." "I like rings," I said. "When you wear it, the diamond will be on one side." The manager is also very irritable. I took out the check and spread it out. "I like to be on the side, as long as it doesn't break, I'll settle the bill with you if it breaks. How much?" He was taken aback when he saw the signature on the check.Probably Xu Cunzi's checks that flow outside are rarely seen.He is familiar with this signature. "How to inlay it? A circle of rectangular gravel—" He was still talking. "Nothing, but a platinum ring around the stone, how much?" He wrote the price on the paper. "We are acquainted with Mr. Xu, and the price has been hit at the lowest—" I have copied the number on the check.I said, "If the ticket is refunded, it's best for you to get acquainted with him." "Miss--" "Cash the check," I stood up, "while the banks are open." "Yes, yes." He must be calling me a little bitch in his heart, I know, for sure. I left the jewelry store and went to my mother.Her airline is nearby.I watched her through the glass case window, she was refilling the powder.Just finished the lunch box.Poor mother, we all need a stable life so badly. From a distance, my mother is really beautiful, with royal blue uniform and goose yellow silk.I knocked on the glass, the first time she didn't hear, but the second time she raised her head and waved to me. I went in and sat in front of her. "Mom." I said. "Have you eaten yet?" she asked. I nod. "Mom." I put my hand on hers. "What's wrong?" She was very sensitive, "What's the matter?" "An appointment with Hamilton again tonight?" I asked. She said, "Yes, I know I'm sorry, but we're leaving soon... You know, you always have." She was a little ashamed. " "Of course, you leave it to me, I'll be fine, really." "The house is only rented until the end of the month...it can be extended...do you need it?" I shake my head. "I can go to a friend's house, or go back to London, mother, if you worry about yourself enough, I will." "I've been sorry for you—" I looked around, "Shhh, mom, this is not a good place to rehearse a Cantonese film." "Screw you!" "Mom, I'm going to be fine. Hong Kong has everything but people who aren't starving to death. Will a twenty-one-year-old girl be in trouble? Of course not. You get married and we both will Had a great time." "Your expenses in England—" "I'll go back and find a summer job." I said, "Don't worry, Mom." Both Mom and I knew that a thousand summer jobs wouldn't pay for tuition.But since she got the answer from my mouth, she didn't pursue it in detail, she just got the chance to step down. "I'm off work, do you want to have dinner with me?" Mom asked. "Ha! Do you think your daughter is in a hurry and needs to have dinner with her mother? I have a thousand men waiting in line for me. See you tonight." I stood up, made a face, and left. I didn't know where to go, I was walking alone in the street, looking out every window, there was a silver fox coat in the leather bag shop.You know, Canadian silver foxes are not the same as Russian silver foxes.There is too much white on the Canadian silver fox, which smells old and gray, and the little white on the Russian silver fox is just on the tip of my hand, which is very beautiful-but I suddenly feel that everything is dull, because these things have now become Easy to get.Nothing has ever been good. What is the taste of something that is readily available?I bought it just to put it at home, and occasionally opened the wardrobe door to have a look and then closed it. I don't mind selling my youth.Youth will be lived if it is not for sale.I went home with a clear conscience and ate canned soup. Xu Cunzi's secretary has called me many times, and Xu answered the phone and said, "I forgot to tell you, would you move to live with me?" "it is good." "I have seen the diamond you selected. It is already being set, and I have the receipt." "It's really fast," I said. "I'll ask the driver to pick you up." He said, "You pack your things." "yes." "Don't worry," he said, "I'll take care of you." "I believe," I said, "I'll pack it up now." "See you later." He hung up the phone. I have nothing to pack, it's just that box from England.This is the only box I took with me.I sat down and wrote a long, long letter to my mother, explaining to her my "encounter" in the past two days and the reason for moving out.But did not leave a phone address: "I will contact you, you don't have to find me - go to Australia to be a housewife, if possible, have a child or two, I will not contact you, but I will write Best regards, give my regards to Mr. Hamilton. Sincerely, my daughter." I wrote while weeping.In fact, there is nothing to cry about. This kind of thing is very common today. Then I went downstairs with my suitcase, and Xu's driver was waiting for me downstairs in that phantom.He got out of the car and put my suitcases away, opened the door for me, closed the door, and all of a sudden, I was in a Rolls-Royce again. Xu Cunzi did not come that night.He notified me that something was wrong.I happily locked the door and slept soundly in an unfamiliar bed. When I woke up the next day, it was already high in the sun.I found food from the refrigerator, prepared breakfast for myself, and ate it calmly. The doorbell rang, and I went to answer the door. It was a maid who came to report and waited on me. I didn't go out. I took out a few books from the suitcase and read them all afternoon. I was very relaxed, satisfied and happy, and all my worries were swept away.I was taken care of like never before in my 21 years of life - why not? The doorbell rang again, and the maid went to answer the door. It was the jewelry store who brought the ring.I sign for it.Put the ring on your finger and ask yourself: Is there any other reason besides money?Xu Cunzi will always be there, when I need him, he is ready.As for me, is it for a sense of security, or for money? Every time I turn my head, who is in the dim light?My head has turned sour, for those who are worth it, and for those who are not worth it.I'm just tired. A 21-year-old is more tired than a 42-year-old. I need a place to rest. Now that Xu Cunzi provided it to me, I feel very happy.The factor here is not just money. No matter whether others believe it or not, I know it is more than money. His call came shortly afterwards.He said, "Why don't you go out? I didn't forbid you to go out on the street." He chuckled. "I know, I'm happy to be in the house myself," I said, "I'm tired of walking around all the time." I was telling the truth, and I didn't mean to please him. "Have you ever contacted my son?" he asked. "You can't tell him to wait for nothing." "I'll push him now," I said. "How to reason?" he asked. "Tell him the truth, I chose his father over him." Xu Cunzi smiled. "It can't be like this, just say you don't have time." "I thought you would let me develop freely." I said gently. "No, I won't." He also answered very gently. I wanted to ask if he would come tonight, but why?I am not in love with him. I turned to the number Conghui gave me, and it was she who answered the call. "Miss Jiang! Where have you been? Congshu and I have been looking for you for two days! My brother is especially good at looking for you." "I want to go back to England," I said. "Tell your brother that I'm not available." "Nonsense, let's go back to England together. The reason you want to go back is very simple: you feel bored. Come out with us, today Jiaming and I are going to visit my sister, and Congshu is also going. Where are you? I will pick you up." "I don't want to come out," I said. "Are you suffering from self-claustrophia? I really can't stand you, come out, okay, hello, okay?" If Conghui knows my identity, if she knows that I am her father's woman now... "Are you still on the other side? Jiang Xibao, hurry up, okay?" She withdrew there, half seductively, "Look at the sun, look, wouldn't it be a pity not to come out? Come out and see us." Go out and meet them.Yes, I also want to use this to learn about the story that Xu Cunzi can hire three hundred private investigators to investigate my life. I don’t have the ability to do so. Before he can control me, I can see my wisdom. "I'm waiting at the pier," I said. "Okay, meet me at the pier in twenty minutes." I opened the door and the car and driver were there.Of course Xu Cunzi would know my every move.When we got to the pier, I told the driver to drive the car away, and I said, "I'm waiting for Xu Conghui." It was Congshu who came, and he waved his hand shyly to me. "Where's smart?" I asked. "I've gone to my sister's house. Today is my sister's eldest daughter's second birthday. You know how smart you are, so you worked hard to make gifts and buy cakes early in the morning." I said, "Then I won't go, it's a grand gathering for your own people." Congshu smiled, "A two-year-old's birthday is considered a grand event? Everyone will take the opportunity to go to my sister's house to make trouble—her place is newly renovated. Let's slip away as soon as we arrive, okay?" "Us?" I asked. "You promised to date me today," he turned his head, "forgot?" I really forgot. The husband Xu Congqi married was surnamed Fang. He was really a gentle and kind man. He was a little fat and had a good temper. You don't have to rely on your father-in-law. A man like Fang Jiakai is worth marrying—let's talk about it when he is forty. If you marry him before forty, I'm afraid you won't live until forty, and you'll be suffocated to death. I couldn't help smiling. Fang Jiakai's two little daughters are as cute as angels. One is dressed in white and the other is in light blue. The only difference is that they don't have two little wings on their backs, otherwise they would be the angels on the murals of foreigners' courts. Xu Congqi was not satisfied with these two daughters, she wanted a son, and she said in public: "If there is no boy in a family, it is not a family at all." Conghui said: "Everyone, look at this woman's unpromising energy, which is considered rare. To say such a thing, it's a good thing she was still a high-achieving student at the University of Hong Kong." Fang Jiakai just smiled naively, and was not opposed to giving birth again. I was studying his eyes and nose to see which part of him was born so well that he could marry a wife like Xu Congqi. Song Jiaming was still sitting not far from Conghui, observing everything sharply with his eyes, I couldn't help but smile again. Conghui put his arm intimately on my shoulder. "What are you laughing at?" she asked me. Song Jiaming said, "You don't want others to laugh when you laugh?" I replied: "Seeing that you are so happy, I am really happy, so I laughed." Xu Congqi said: "Miss Jiang and Conghui really hit it off, and they love the house as much as ever." Congshu smiled and asked, "Are we a group of crows?" Cong wanted to laugh, "I have to ask Miss Jiang." She always kept a polite distance from me and refused to call me by my name. I walked to the terrace and stood leisurely looking at the scenery. At this moment, in front of Xu's family, I was the winner. Turning his head, he saw Song Jiaming. "Aren't you going to accompany Conghui?" I asked sullenly. "Smart is innocent, but it's not a child. I don't have to be with her all the time." He said every sentence with bones. I smiled and said peacefully: "There are such people! I am only afraid that others will take advantage of him. You are always on guard against me, lest I know what I will covet in intelligence. Mr. Song, it is true that intellectuals become snobbish. It's three points more powerful, don't you think?" Song Jiaming felt a little uneasy. I said: "I want to take advantage, and I will not plan on Conghui." I would add, "I will not plan on Congshu." "Miss Jiang, if I make you feel like a villain, it's my fault." He was still able to maintain his demeanor. I looked at Song Jiaming's changed face, and pursued the victory: "Don't be afraid, Mr. Song, you don't need to apologize, the poor should be suspected." I laughed, "As the saying goes: A dog's eyes look down on people, and intelligence is indeed a little naive. Think of me as a friend, it's really..." I still smiled, Song Jiaming stared at me for a while, bowed slightly, and went back to the living room without a word. This damned person doesn't have the surname Xu, but he is just about to marry a daughter of the Xu family, so it's really shameless to worry about the Xu family like this.I don't know how much money Xu Cunzi will put in his name in the future. I have a pleasant feeling that no one knows what I hold, and that this secret makes me very valuable.I turned the ring on my hand this way, and then back again. Congshu walked out. "You're here?" he said. "Let's go somewhere else. What's there to do for a kid's birthday?" "I like to stay here. I have something to do later, so I can't accompany you." "Yes, Conghui said you wanted to return to England early." I was silent for a while, leaning on the balcony railing and looking down, I don't know where the sound of cicadas came from. "Can I accompany you back to England?" I turned my head and didn't hear clearly what Congshu said. "I'm fine. I can accompany you to Cambridge. If you don't mind, we can go rowing." Cong Shu's voice was very excited. I looked at him, and this time it was not exciting at all, because I no longer had to expect these rich young masters to favor me and promote me.我只是奇怪他怎么会看中我这么一个人。 “我不行，聪恕。”我直截了当地说。 他涨红了耳朵。“你不喜欢我，你只喜欢聪慧。” 我不十分确定我是否喜欢聪慧。大部分漂亮富足的女孩子喜欢找一个条件比她略差的女伴，加借衬托起她的矜贵，聪慧对我也不外是如此心理，她携我出来散心，她帮助了我，成全她伟大的人格……我抬起头对聪恕说：“我当然喜欢你，聪恕，但是我这次回去——我有男朋友在剑桥，我不是自由身。” “啊。”他也靠着露台栏杆，“但聪慧说你告诉她，你并没有男朋友。” “那时候我跟聪慧不熟，不好意思告诉她。”我说。 “他——比我强很多？”聪恕反而坦然了。 “我不知道，聪恕，我不认为把人来作比较是公道的事，总而言之，如果他的优点较为适合我，我就喜欢他。” “我也有优点吗？”聪恕问。 “当然，聪恕，你这么善良、温柔、诚恳……你的优点很多很多。” 聪慧在我们身后笑出来，“是吗？”她走过来，“你看到聪恕有这么多优点？我不相信，香港有很多失意的女孩子也不会相信。” “聪慧！”聪恕不悦。 “二哥哥，你算啦，我不是不帮你忙，你瞧你，弄巧成拙。”她转头看我，“怎么，你真的回英国？” I nod. “我打算到新加坡去转谐和号飞机。我还未乘搭过谐和号。” 聪慧端详我：“两天不见，喜宝，你有什么地方好像变了，”她终于看到我手上的戒指，“多么好看的戒指，新买的吗？” “晤。”我点点头，“聪慧，我有点儿事，我要告辞了。” 聪恕说，“我送你。” “不，不，我自己能够回去。”我说。 我逐一向他们告辞，勖聪憩送我到门口：“姜小姐，不送不送。” 不用她送。她父亲的司机与车子在楼下接我便行了。 我开始明白勖家的毛病在什么地方。太有教养太过含蓄太过谦让，表面上看仿佛很美满，其实谁也不知谁在做什么，苍白而隔膜，自己一家在演着一台戏，自己一家人又权充观众——还有更诙谐无聊可怜可笑的事嘛？我也明白勖存姿与勖聪恕怎么会对我有兴趣，因为我是活生生的赤裸裸有存在感的一个人。 我有什么忧虑？无产阶级丝毫不用担心顾忌，想到什么说什么，要做什么做什么，最多打回原形，我又不是没做过穷人，有啥子损失？ 哪有勖家的人这样，带着一箱面具做人，什么场合用什么面具，小心翼翼地戴上，描金的镶银的嵌宝石的，弄到后来，不知道是面具戴着他们，还是他们戴着面具。 连对婴儿说话都要说：“谢谢”，“不敢当”、“请”。 勖存姿有什么选择呢？他不能降低人格往荔园去看脱衣舞，或是包下台湾歌女。他又想找个情妇以娱晚年，在偶然的场合遇见了我——实在是他的幸运。 我的信心忽然充分起来，说穿了大家都一般空虚，至少我与老妈姜咏丽女士尚能玉帛相见，开心见诚地抱头痛哭。他们能够吗？ 我保证勖存姿没有与他太太说话已有二十五年。勖太太那种慢吞吞腻答答的神情，整个人仿佛被猪油粘住了，拖泥带水的……忽然之间我对他们一家都恶感有加，或者除了聪慧，聪慧的活泼虽然做作，可幸她实在年轻，并且够诚意，并不讨厌。或者也除了聪恕。聪恕的羞怯沦为娘娘腔，明眼人一看就知道是怎么一回事，但聪恕像多数女性化的男人，他很可爱，他对我好感是因为我体内的男性荷尔蒙比他尚多。 我不喜欢勖聪憩。对方家凯毫无意见。厌恶宋家明——他光明了宋家似乎还不够，尚想改革勖家。勖存姿并不见得有那么笨，再不争气的儿子跟女婿还差一层肚皮。宋家明除了得到聪慧的那份嫁妆，也没什么其他的好处，他应该明白。 在这次短短的聚会中我把勖家人物的关系分析得一清二楚，很有点得意。 回到勖存姿的小公寓，他本人坐在客厅听音乐喝白兰地。老实说，看见他还真的有点儿高兴。 因为我一向寂寞。 “哦，”我说，“你来了。” 他抬起头，目光炯炯，说：“你到过我大女儿家吗？” “是。刚回来。”我答。 “我以为你应该知道避开他们。” “是，我是故意上门去的。”我说，“很抱歉，你是生气了？怕亲戚晓得我现在的身份？” 勖存姿说：“我不怕任何人，你把我估计太低了。” “或者我把自己估计过高。我尚未习惯我已把自己出售给你一个人。” 他沉默一会儿。 “我已经派人到剑桥去为你找到房子。你最快什么时候可以动身回英国？要不要与母亲说再见？” 他要把我遣回英国。这也是一个好主意。 我问：“关于我，你知道多少？” he smiles. “你是一个年轻的女孩子，你有什么历史呢？” 我不服气。我说：“我有男朋友在英国。” “你是指那位韩先生？”他笑，“你不会喜欢他，你一早已经不喜欢他。” 我也忍不住笑，我坐下来。“你对我倒是知道得很清楚。不过在英国，我也可以找到新男朋友。” 他凝视我。“总比找上我自己的儿子好一点儿。” 我大胆假设，“聪恕？聪恕对女孩子没有兴趣。” 勖存姿的面色一变，“他对你有。” 我说：“因为我比他更像一个男人。” 勖存姿老练地转改话题。“你像男人？我不会付百多万港币送一只戒指给男人。”他扬扬手，“看你戴着它的姿态！像戴破铜烂铁似的。” 我看着他。 他也看着我。 这实在是我第一次放胆地，仔仔细细地把他看清楚。他的确已经上了六十岁。两鬓斑白，头发有点稀疏，带天然波浪，但梳理得非常好，面孔上自然多皱褶，但男人的皱纹与女人的不一样，他的眼袋并不见得十分明显，皮肤松弛只增加个性。数十年前他一定是个无上英俊的男人，现在也还是很有风度很漂亮，但……确然是老了。 当然，精心修饰过的衣服帮助他很多。 脱掉衣服后，勖存姿的身材会如何？想到这里，我并没有脸红，反正有点苍自寒冷的感觉。到底是六十多岁的老年人。再保养得好，也还是六十多岁的老年人。 我相信他也是用同样心思在看我：这个女孩子，在她身上投资，是否值得？她值这么多吗？她的胸脯是真的还是穿着厚垫子的胸罩？大腿是否圆浑……他是有经验的老手，他不会花错钱。 最使他担心应是将来如何控制我。我想这也是容易的。他有钱，我需要钱。我一定会乖乖地听命于他——在某一个程度之内。 我看着他良久，整个公寓里没有一点点声响，柔和的阳光通过白色纱帘透进来，他太阳棕的皮肤显得很精神。I sigh. “我替你去订飞机票回伦敦。”他说，“到时有人在伦敦接你。” “我知道，你在李琴公园有房子。”我说。 he laughs. “我喜欢聪明的女孩子。” “是的，人家都这么说，请替我买'谐和号'头等票子。” “你愿意到新加坡转机？”他诧异。 “愿意。”我笑。 “我会在伦敦见你。”他说。 “一年见多少次？”我问。 “我不知道。你的功课会很忙，”他含蓄地，“交际生活也会很忙。” “你可以顾人盯死我。”我笑。 “我早已派好人了。”他也笑，“学校、家，伦敦、剑桥、香港——我有没有告诉过你？我是一个很妒忌的老人。” “我感到荣幸。”我说。 “我有事，要先走。”他站起来。 "Goodbye." I said. “我留下了现钞在书桌抽屉里。”他临出门说。 圣诞老人。 我不想在他面前提“老”字，不是不敢，有点不忍。他又不是不知道他老，我何必提醒他。 勖存姿毕竟是勖存姿，他转头笑笑说：“你是五月的明媚好风光，我是十二月。十二月有圣诞老人，我是一个胜任的圣诞老人。” 我把手臂叠在胸前。“勖先生，”我说，“与你打交道做买卖真是乐事。” “我也深有同感，姜小姐。” 他上车走了。 我在屋里看戚本大字。隔很久我放下书。现款，他说。在书房抽屉里。 我走到书房，小心翼翼地坐下来，轻轻地拉开第一格抽屉。No.我把第一格抽屉推回去。如果不在第一格，那么一定在第三格，别问我为什么，勖存姿不像一个把现钞放在第二格抽屉的人。 我更轻地拉开第三格，抽屉只被移动一时，我已看见满满的一千元与五百元大钞。我的心剧跳，我一生没见过这么多的直版现钞，钞票与钻石又不一样，钻石是穿着皮裘礼服的女人。现钞是……裸女。 我从未曾这样心跳过。就算是圣三一学院收我做学生那一天，我也没有如此紧张，因为那是我自己劳苦所得，何喜之有？但现在，现在不同，到目前为止，勖存姿连手都没碰过我。他说得不对，他比圣诞老人更慷慨。既然如此，我也乐得大方。我把抽屉推回去。反正是我的东西，飞不了，让它们堆在那里待在那里休息在那里，愉快、舒畅、坦然地贬值。 我竟然被照顾得那么妥当。我伸伸腿，搁得舒服点。 这使我想起一首歌，乔治·萧伯纳的剧本“卖花女”被改为电影，女主角高声唱： “我所需要只是某处一间房间。 远离夜间的冷空气。 有一张老大的椅子。 呵那将是多么可爱。 某人的头枕在我膝盖上， 又温柔又暖和。 他把我照顾得妥妥当当， 呵那将是多么可爱……” 我记得很清楚，歌词中只说“可爱”，没有“爱情”。 爱情是另外一件事。爱情是太奢华的事。 至于我，我已经太满足目前的一切。 我可以正式开始庆祝，因为我不必再看世上各种各样的人奇奇怪怪的脸色，我可以开始痛惜我自己悲惨的命运——沦落在一个男人的手中、做他的金屋里的阿娇。 只有不愁衣食的人才有资格用时间来埋怨命运。 我把双腿转一个位置。 电话铃响了，我拿起听筒：“喂？” 那边不响。我再“喂。”不响。我冷笑一声：“神秘电话嘛？”放下话筒。 电话再响，我再拿起话筒，“喂，有话请说好不好？” 那边轻轻地问，“是你？真是你？” "Who?" I asked. “聪恕。” he.他怎么知道我在此地。如果他知道，那么每个人都已经知道。消息真快。 我应该如何应付？ 聪恕低声地说：“他们说你在这里，我与聪慧都不相信。” 我维持缄默。 “为什么？”聪恕问，“为什么？” 我应该如何回答？因为我穷？还是因为我虚荣？还是两者皆备？ 我并不觉得羞愧，事无大小，若非当事人本身，永远没法子明了真相，聪恕无法了解到我的心情。多年来的贫乏——爱的贫乏，物质的贫乏，一切一切，积郁到今天，忽然得到一个出口，我不可能顾忌到后果，我一定要做了再说。 “你是为他的钱，是不是？”聪恕问，“我也有钱，真的，我父亲的钱便是我的钱，别担心钱的问题。” 聪恕，你父亲的钱怎么等于你的钱？我心中想问。 “我要见你，我现在就来。”他放下电话。 难怪勖存姿要把我调回剑桥，知子莫若父，他知道他儿子。聪恕傻气得紧。我披上衣服便离开公寓，我不想见聪恕，这将会是多么尴尬的事。 我一个人踱在街上。女佣人问我上哪里，我摇摇头，我自己也不知道，我怎么晓得，我只知道我一定要避开聪恕。 司机就在门口，他拉开车门，我上车。 我说：“随便兜兜风。” 他们说，坐劳斯莱斯，最忌自己开关车门。里说的：没吃过猪肉，也见过猪肉，也见过猪跑。那么终究有猪肉吃的时候不会出洋相。 坐在车于里要端端正正，头不要左右两边晃，要安然稳当，若无其事。 我现在就这么坐着。车子缓缓驶向郊外的马路，勖聪恕不会再见到我。 或者我会叫勖存姿买一辆跑车给我。像聪慧在开的小黑豹，抑或是别的牌子，我可以好好地想一想，他会答应的。假使我要月亮，他如果办得到，他也会去摘下来——不是为爱我，而是因为他的虚荣心：勖存姿的女人什么都有，勖存姿是个有本事的男人。 司机忽然开口：“姜小姐，少爷的车在后面追我们。” "what?" 司机小心翼翼地说：“少爷的车子，你请往后看看。” 我转过头，勖聪恕开着一辆式样古怪的跑车，紧紧贴在劳斯菜斯的后面。 我问：“他跟着我们多久了？”我不是不慌张的。 “一出大路，姜小姐。” “摆脱他，我们加速。” “姜小姐，少爷这辆车比我们的快。” 好，设法了。 “照常速，假装没有看见他。” "yes." 但是勖聪恕超车，当他的车子追过我们的时候，他减低速度，逼得司机停下车来。 “姜小姐——”司机转头。 “不关你事。”我说，“你开门让我下车。”