Chapter 3 Chapter 3 disappears

(1) This is how my new life began. I changed from Lin Nanyi to Mr. Lin. Sometimes on campus, when I saw a group of female students passing by, everyone shouted in unison: "Hello, teacher!" I turned my head to look behind, and the girls laughed and left. Well, for a long time, I couldn't recognize my role. The uncertain boy who sang with his guitar on the street suddenly had to "be a role model for others", in Tutu's words, he also had to "be a role model for a husband".Well, it's a little difficult. However, life is like this, there is a song called "Take Your Time", Tutu likes to sing it, and I like to listen to it too, yes, take your time, experience it slowly, this is the rhythm we must master.

Outside of work, my biggest hobby is of course music.Music is my ideal, and I have said this to more than one person more than once.The one I hear the most is Tutu, she always pats me on the head gently and says: "I'm a naive man who won't grow up, I'm hungry, please go and cook." "Why can't you burn it?" "Because I'm hungry, I can't burn it anymore." She said slyly. I obediently went to burn it.I do love Tutu very much, and I am willing to dote on Tutu like this, but in my heart, I know that these ordinary and ordinary days are not Tutu's future, nor my future.Our future should start from "Twelve Nights", blossom and bear fruit...

It's a pity that no one has paid attention to "Twelve Nights". No college student music festivals, no other music festivals, not even interviews with idiot journalists from idiot magazines, and even with a beautiful female lead singer, the demos sent to the record company still go nowhere.Even the bar street has begun to welcome R&B singers more. It is cheaper and much more pleasing to hire a girl to sing a few English songs a night than to hire a band. We are quickly being forgotten.It turns out that opportunity is like a proud girl who, after being rejected once, insists on not patronizing again.

However, I can take consolation that my teaching career has been going well.Tianzhong, where I live, is a key point in the province. Recently, the Provincial Education Commission has vigorously advocated "quality education". There is a shortage of talents, and I have a place where I can use them by accident. I have my hands full as an instrumental orchestra instructor and choir advisor.Ironically, less than three months after the establishment of the instrumental group, the student guitar playing and singing program directed by me won the first prize in the provincial art competition.This seems to be a grand event of "quality education" in Tianzhong. The school league committee specially held a celebration banquet for us. It was actually a small art performance. When they told me to prepare my own program, I don't know if it was because of As a prank, suggest that Twelfth Nights come to the show.

They said yes. On that day, the four of us dressed very honestly. Monster and Zhang Muer were both wearing white T-shirts and jeans, while Tutu was wearing a sailor outfit similar to a student uniform. His long hair was tied high in a ponytail behind his head. He looks even more middle school than a middle school student. The repertoires sung are also quite satisfactory. "Olive Tree", "Orchid Grass", and "Visiting Spring" are all healthy and uplifting repertoires that can't find any faults.We didn't sing that song "I Wanna Know Who You Are" until near the end.

The whole school went crazy, the students clapped their hands and jumped up, the atmosphere was extremely high.Many students rushed up to ask for Tutu's autograph, and we managed to save her from the stage. Tutu winked at me.When there was no one around, he secretly asked me: "How is it, I didn't embarrass you?" "Wei Rui guessed it." I said. She laughed, and patted my shoulder: "Tell me, which girl pursues you the most, let her come and PK with Aunt Tutu first." "Nothing." I said. "I don't believe it." She shook her shoulders and said, "Are you so confused?"

Just as I was talking, a girl squeezed over: "Ms. Lin, please sign." "Me?" I pointed at Tutu and said, "Should she sign it?" "Let's sign together." The girl said happily, "Ms. Lin, your girlfriend is very beautiful!" Wow, people all over the world have piercing eyes. Tutu twirled the pen in his hand triumphantly, it seems that being my girlfriend is quite a glorious thing. After the performance, the school invited us to dinner. The secretary of the Communist Youth League did not know where his brain was convulsed. He shook hands with us and toasted us one by one. People, there is a future!"

I don't know if this old man would faint in shock and anger if he knew that Tutu was just a student of a vocational high school, and that she was a troubled girl who used to hang out in bars. At the end of the celebration banquet, we packed up the guys, and the monster drove his newly bought car. Zhang Muer asked me while moving his drum to the car: "How much is this night?" "Money?" I was dumbfounded for a second. Zhang Muer immediately reacted: "Oh, obligatory, I understand." He flicked his drum with his fingers to hide his embarrassment.We sat in the back seat together, he didn't speak for a while, but couldn't help but asked again: "Then you won such an award, how much did they give you?"

"No money." Tutu gave him a slap, "This is to cultivate the music seedlings of the motherland, understand? Just worry about some money, you are not vulgar?" "I'm vulgar. I'm vulgar." Zhang Muer laughed. Suddenly the atmosphere was a bit weird. I lit a cigarette, and the monster and Tutu stopped it at the same time. Tutu said: "Don't smoke!" When I was young, I could eat cigarettes as a meal. I don’t know when everyone has changed. The monster sent us downstairs, the sound-sensing light in the corridor had long been broken, we climbed up the stairs in the dark, and Tutu kept silent.The corridor is very narrow, and my guitar would hit the wall and make a clanking sound. Tutu leaned gently on my arm, and every time it hit, she would sigh imperceptibly.

When I got home, Tutu took a shower, and I surfed the Internet.There was the sound of running water in the bathroom, and after a while Tutu ran out and said, "Lin Nanyi, the bathroom drain is blocked." I was trying to listen to some top-quality guitar playing pieces on the Guitar China Forum, and I didn't look back: "I'll ask someone to fix it tomorrow." "What about today?" "You won't die if you don't take a bath for a day!" I was impatient. She was so angry that she slapped her slippers to my side, reached out and unplugged the power: "Lin Nanyi, you are getting more and more exaggerated now!"

"Who is going too far?" I pointed at the old IBM that was forcibly shut down, "Tell me, who is going too far now?" She stared at me with wide eyes as if she wanted to eat people, and after more than ten seconds, she put on a forced calm posture: "I'm too lazy to argue with you!" Then, the slippers snapped, and I heard her loudly." Hmph," before slamming the bedroom door. This is the first time we fight over trivial matters. That day I stayed online late, watched entertainment after news, and sports after entertainment.At two o'clock, I was so sleepy that I was yawning, and I couldn't read the webpage anymore. I pushed open the bedroom door, and she was lying facing the wall. When I came in, she shrugged her shoulders imperceptibly—she wasn't asleep yet. Of course my anger disappeared immediately. I couldn't figure out how I could be angry with Tutu?I walked gently to the bed and was hugged by her through the thin air conditioner.We made up just like that, no words needed.When you are in love, there is no need to say sorry. "Lin Nanyi, tell me, if we were rich, wouldn't we quarrel?" I wrapped my arms around Tutu lightly, and she asked out of nowhere. I thought for a while: "It should still be noisy. But I still love you the same." "Lin Nanyi, you're so kind." She finally yawned reassuringly, and suddenly said, "Actually, they should give you some bonus. You should change to a better guitar." "It would be nice if this kind of key middle school can give music teachers a way out." I comforted her, "Maybe there will be a bonus next time." "Actually, why do you want to go to school? Isn't there an Internet company that wants you?" "It's the closest thing I can get to a career in music." In the dark, Tutu laughed softly, as if he was very happy: "You are so stupid. Why did I fall in love with you, a silly boy?" I pretended to be angry: "Then you can change it. What do you think of the monster?" She hit me lightly: "Don't talk nonsense." Then she fell asleep, she slept very, very quietly, she didn't snore or grind her teeth, she was as cute as a kitten.I was afraid of waking her up, so I didn't dare to change my position for a long time, and my arms gradually became numb.I never told Tutu that I actually suffered from insomnia that night. For the first time in my life, I was actually frustrated by my stubbornness. I hate myself for being such a fool. If I compromise more with this world, can I Give Tutu a happier life? One night I failed to come up with an answer.Maybe there will never be an answer. Rehearsals for "Twelve Nights" continued, but persistence was slowly getting tough.Without performances, without money, even buying an effects unit is cautious.The tone of my student guitar is barely audible, and I've been wanting to buy a new one—of course my dream is just a Vowinkel mid-priced guitar, 20,000 yuan, but if not, go to the Blue Shirt Guitar Custom Workshop in Shanghai I am also satisfied with ordering a 5000 yuan one.Zhang Muer's salary in the infirmary of University A was meager, and he became more and more indifferent to his master drum, and gradually began to arrive late and leave early, asking for leave under excuses. The monster always said: "Wait until I figure out a way." His way is to keep raising money by himself, which is not a long-term solution at all, and God knows how long it will last. When the monster finally figured out a way, the first thing he did was to sell his car. He wants to open a bar by himself, and the name is "Twelve Nights".This idea made him very excited. He kept wandering around the bar street, and finally found a suitable store. The money from selling the car happened to pay the transfer fee and half a year's rent. "From now on we will be able to perform there regularly, with a regular audience and fame," he seemed very excited, "There will be bread, and there will be milk." I patted him on the shoulder: "How much does it cost? We have the money to contribute, but we don't have the money to contribute." Zhang Muer gave me a sad look. "What should I do if I have no money or strength?" He muttered. The monster responded quickly: "What did you say?" Zhang Muer shrugged: "I mean, it's dead anyway, is struggling useful?" "What did you say?" The monster wondered if he heard it wrong. "Zhang Muer, can you say it again?" "I mean," Zhang Muer looked desperate, "You like to play, and you can afford it. Those of us who can't afford it will not be with you!" "You..." The monster was so angry that he lost his voice, and choked out a sentence for a long time: "You kid is sick!" "I'm sick?" Zhang Muer seemed to be deliberately making trouble today, "You have money," pointing at me, "He has a girlfriend, and I'm sick, just right!" Tutu smoothed things over: "Maybe the fungus is really sick today..." Zhang Muer slammed the drumstick on the ground: "You are sick!" Of course I protected Tutu: "You kid, don't put a pole on your face!" Before Zhang Muer could hit me back, the monster roared: "I can't practice today!" He was so angry that he threw his favorite Warwick bass: "Get out of here! Get out!" It's useless to hang on, I gave Zhang Muer a sideways look, and angrily pulled Tutu out the door. (3) She took nothing with her.Her clothes were hung in the closet, and her shoes were neatly placed on the shoe rack, and each pair was brushed clean.Her cleansers and creams were crowded in the bathroom, many of them only half used.Every detail of the house is a true record of her existence, but she just disappeared. Her phone is under the pillow, with the pink hello kitty phone chain I gave her attached to it.I call three times, thirty times and three hundred times a day, but I can only hear the same CRBT, her favorite song "Heartbeat", Lin Xiaopei's cool voice repeats sadly: "Ah, if we can't be together forever ..." I used to think that we could be together forever. After she left, I once rewatched the movie "Heartbeat".Haojun put the ring in the water glass and said to Xiaorou: "If you accept it, drink it." Xiaorou's answer was to pick up the ring and put it on her finger.This is a rejection. No matter how noble and gentle, she still refuses. Perhaps, leaving is Tutu's rejection.to my rejection. At the beginning, I didn't think that she might have an accident. She may be detained by the inexplicable police because she did not bring her documents, she may be taken out of the city by a strange relative, or some.In short, she didn't have time to inform me of all the above possibilities, because it happened that she didn't bring a mobile phone, just a coincidence. The most banal is probably when she gets into a car accident on the corner of the street. The worst possibility is that those hooligans she had provoked are targeting her again, and this time the revenge is not as simple as a quarrel in a bar. Yes, I thought about all those possibilities.Until I opened her drawer, opened the small bag of her usual attire documents and important bills, and found that it was empty.The 20,000 yuan is not there, so at least I can rest assured that she took the money away. I went to her school to find her.This time, I went directly to the Academic Affairs Office, showed my ID card and work card, and told her that she was the only relative of an orphan student of mine, that her cell phone number had been changed and I needed to contact her urgently—in short, I had to find her. "Name?" The old lady who managed the list in the Academic Affairs Office looked at me from above reading glasses with a kind face. Her real name is Liu Sizhen.She didn't deliberately tell me this name, but I saw it from the ID card when I helped her apply for the community pass.At that time, people from the community security department asked us: "Relationship?" She answered "fiancee" with a smile, and then looked at me and laughed. At that time, we believed that we would get married, have children, and live happily together. lifetime. "Class?" The old lady took out the roster. "I don't know much... I only know that it is a 2000-level accountant." She buried her face in the roster and read it line by line as carefully as she checked her nails. Then she shook her head regretfully and said to me, "No." I couldn't hide my disappointment, and she must have seen it too. Maybe she thought I was a good person. At the moment I was about to leave, she stopped me: "I can check all the students from that year for you." After I thanked her, she buried her face in the roster again with her cheerful, benevolent air. "Found it! Here." She finally raised her head and pointed to an area the size of a fingernail. It said, Liu Sizhen, financial management, class two. It turned out that she was studying financial management. "So where is the classroom of the second class of finance?" I tried to be as polite as possible. "Wait," the old lady suddenly showed a look of surprise on her face. "You really want to find her?" "certainly." "She dropped out of school a year ago." She closed the roster and looked at me almost sadly. Dropped out. I was home alone that day, I mean, without Tutu's house, which I still call "home" tentatively, opening a lot of beers in silence.I don't know how many days ago, she sorted out her documents, prepared her way out, wiped out the traces of her existence, and withdrawn from my life step by step in a planned way, but I never knew about all of this? Dropped out a year ago? How much do I really know her?Can we really live together sweetly, but in fact, we are as strangers as two passers-by? When the wine was almost drunk, I suddenly understood that the Liu Sizhen I was looking for was not the Tutu I was looking for.My beloved Tutu is dead, maybe she lives in a place I don't know with the name "Liu Sizhen", and that has nothing to do with me. Thinking of this, I felt very at ease, and even thought a little happily, since Tutu is dead, what am I doing alive? Let me die with her, die. The way I choose to die is to drink to death. The reason why I didn't die was that after I missed a week of class without reason and refused to answer countless calls, Zhang Mu'er and the monster kicked my door open. "Why aren't you dead yet?" Zhang Muer asked the first sentence when he rushed in. "Soon, soon," I replied humbly, reaching for the bottle. The monster snatched the beer calmly: "Anan, you can't drink any more." Why?I laughed, why?He and I were fighting for a beer bottle. I'm sure I was a little drunk but still very agile and strong. The monster couldn't fight it. I took a few steps back while holding the bottle and sat on the ground. , Then, he picked up the bottle and poured it down his throat. "Enough!" Zhang Muer stood in the middle of the room, and Shi Potian shouted in shock, "Lin Nanyi, you can die now!" I looked at him vaguely, and he approached me aggressively, pushing me Dragging to the window, "You did this for a woman, huh? You are going to die," he pushed me out of the window vigorously, "You can jump directly from here, why don't you?" At that moment, half of my body leaned out of the window, and I had the illusion that I could hear the soft wind.Then I saw the path that Tutu used to walk, the bench that Tutu used to sit on, the swing that Tutu used to laugh on. I know why I don't dance. I don't want to live, but I can't die either.God knows, even if the chance of Tutu coming back is only one in a million, I have to wait for it. one year.ten years.lifetime.