Chapter 11 Chapter 10 "Servo Speed"

I went on a double date with Zhang Bao last week. Before leaving, Zhang Bao said that I would invite everyone to my house for coffee this weekend. "Who said I want to treat you to coffee?" "I will save you the hesitation of asking Sally alone, and use group activities to draw your relationship closer." "Why do you want to go home?" "The feeling of home is very warm, and girls will lose Vigilance." I shook my head, "Why did Zhuge Liang sing an empty city plan in the first place? It was because he was afraid that the enemy would know that his strength was empty. When we first met, I invited her to my house, just like seeing me naked when she was wearing a coat. She would look through my bookshelves and find All the books are new. Go to my toilet and see a circle of yellow things in the toilet. Look in my refrigerator and smell spaghetti from two months ago. Open my closet and find women's underwear. She will I know there is no letter in my mailbox, and the phone has not rang all night. The image I have worked so hard to lose overnight?" "But if you design it properly, there is a chance that it will be successful. Think about it, in case you If you really call, the bedroom is right next door. You have the home field advantage, and you don’t have to pay for the hotel.” “There’s a family photo next to my bed, how can I have adultery with someone else?” Our discussion came to an end.On Wednesday, Zhang Bao called, "Have you made an appointment with them?" "I thought we were just talking." On Thursday Zhang Bao said, "They called me and complained that you were not sincere!" Call you, why don't you make an appointment with them directly?" "You are the master, of course you should invite... Wait a minute, oh... You dare not call Sally, right?" "Who... who What did you say?" "You have a higher education and read Socrates. You speculated on stocks and lost 100 million in a day. You have been to the Antarctic and found the remains of aliens. You did not carry oxygen when diving, and once encountered Shark. These big winds and waves can't trouble you, but you dare not call Sally!" "I'm afraid of being rejected by her, afraid that she thinks I'm too aggressive. I'm afraid that her tone will be cold, and she will say um... I'm afraid I can't." Afraid that when I called her she was in a meeting and lowered her voice, afraid that when she called back she would seriously ask what you wanted from me. Afraid that her excuse would insult my intelligence, afraid that she would say that I am not sure if I could come Call you again. I’m afraid she’s too smart, always leave yourself a lot of flexibility. Everyone who invites her first asks who else is going, and carefully considers where there are the most handsome men and the fewest beauties. Is there anyone who can be with her in the future? She is in business, is there anyone who can help her make connections. If she shows up, she must be an hour late, enjoying the advantage of being introduced to everyone one by one. If she doesn't like the guests present, she will always have an excuse to leave first, and she will never remember the price of the meal. You should pay one-tenth." "Sally won't do that, she likes you. She also asked me your zodiac sign and blood type, and whether the sleeve length of your shirt is 31." At noon on Friday, Zhang Bao asked again: "Why do you still Didn't contact them?" "I left a message in Sally's office." "When?" "Last night at 12 o'clock." "Who will be there at 12 o'clock? You want to avoid her on purpose." "At least she knows I'm in Look for her, if she is interested, she will call me back." "She is at the company, you can call now." I emailed. I didn't reply before I got off work on Friday.

At noon on Saturday, Zhang Bao said, "Has she received the e-mail?" "I...I'm not sure, it depends on the speed of their company's server." "You call them now." Cool, I didn't ask my brother's number at all." "Too bad, I didn't ask." "They have your brother, if they are sincere, why didn't they call you?" "They have called several times before, and now You have to be a little reserved." "Why are you so petty," I cursed, "what's the point of making a phone call?" "Forget it tonight." "Wait a minute!" I grabbed him, "in case they get an E- mail, what if they really come?" "I can't bet my weekend on the speed of their server." "You still come. If they don't come, at least I and you. We can watch Titany on satellite TV, Listen to Jolin Tsai’s new CD.” “Watching Titany with you? I’d rather go home and read Notes from Underground!” “I still have Ai Iijima’s VCD, Playboy’s Millennium Calendar.” “No one wants you to keep At home." "I'm going out, what if they come?" Under my pleading, Zhang Bao reluctantly came to my house, on the condition that if they didn't show up, he could use my phone to dial the 0204 number.He took out the mobile phone, and we both stared at the green flash on it.The reception is good, the battery is strong, but there is no sound.Two hours after the appointed time, the doorbell finally rang, and I opened the door...

Happy to take the pizza.The Titanic was at its climax, and I handed a piece to Zhang Bao, who was crying beyond hope. "Mr. 90 Degree Pants" I had a party at home last week, and when I woke up the next morning, I was really happy and sad. "Where are Sally and Vicky?" Zhang Bao yelled when he woke up at noon, obviously not used to girls running away first. "Vicky is getting married!" I went to find Vicky on Monday and told Zhang Bao when I came back. "What?" "She's getting married, and last night was her farewell bachelor party. She fulfilled all her sexual fantasies, so she won't have an affair after marriage." "I thought she really liked me..." "She likes you, and she said you will always be in her heart." "I don't want to be in her heart, I want to be in her bed!" "It's a pity that she is going to marry someone else." "Who is her husband?" "You Don't waste your time, you can't compare with him!" "He's a laser head, strong, humorous, unrestrained and rich?" "He's Mr. 90 Degree Pants, he peels apples every day and delivers them." "What?" "His pants Straight, sitting posture is correct, there is a 90-degree right angle under the knee when sitting, you can open a door there." "What does he do?" "He is a doctor in the gastroenterology department. I met Vicky in the outpatient clinic on Thursday. .The stomach pain that has plagued Vicky for many years, and his operation was very successful. Before the anesthesia, her eyes were so red from crying, he took off the mask and said, I promise it will never hurt. The operation took 90 minutes longer, just because he insisted on thinning A month later, he called Vicky to follow up and asked her if the wound was swollen. Vicky said thank you for saving my life, and I will treat you to dinner to celebrate." "Is he her doctor? God, this This kind of competition is unfair!" Zhang Bao stood up angrily, "He can ask her to take off her clothes, and she won't have any doubts. He can touch her belly button, and she said, please feel carefully. He can take a gastroscope for her, and she will feel pain. He has to hold his palm to death. He can call her at any time, under the guise of discussing her illness. He can come to her house in the middle of the night and say that I am still a little worried about you." White clothes. Strict personality, read the latest novels. Taciturn, making model airplanes at home on weekends. No sentimentality, Vicky gave a juice machine for her birthday." "You mean he is a good doctor, but not a good lover?" "That depends on how you define a "good lover"? Although he can't talk sweetly, what he does is impressive. At lunch, he will peel two apples, slice them and put them in plastic bags. Then put them in the hospital's official envelope, Please deliver it to Vicky before one o'clock." "Did he use a scalpel to peel the apples? Are there any bacteria in those apples?" "I didn't ask so carefully." "How did he keep the apples from changing color during delivery? Shall I wash it with saline first?" "The point is not how he handles the apples, but how he does this kind of thing." "What's the big deal? I also gave Vicky roses, and I gave them two dozen "" "Have you personally selected, cut, matched, and bandaged?" "This is an era of professional division of labor, and doing everything by yourself violates the economic principle." "Not only is he doing everything by himself, but he is also a perfectionist. He squeezes comprehensive juice for her every morning , ask a nutritionist to watch. He won't wake up early in the morning and say I love you, but he will make sure that the juice she drinks in the morning contains vitamins A, B, C, D, and E." "Is he a doctor or a chef?" "His carefulness is not limited to eating. He can also play the violin and won the provincial championship when he was a child. Once Vicky was in a bad mood and called to talk to him. He didn't know how to encourage him, so he said let me play the violin for you. Vicky is holding the phone and may lose the connection at any time. He puts the microphone on his legGo up and start tuning slowly.When Vicky's car passed the circle of Ren'ai Road, she looked up at the sky full of stars.At this time, the theme song of "101 Marriage Proposals" came to my ears! "I guess he can also play Kenny G, with his eyes closed when he performs," ​​Zhang Bao said bitterly, "with his mouth as hard as a vacuum cleaner, but he doesn't forget to stop and say I love you." " "Look, this is your problem!" ""my question? "" You are used to playing love games, and your skills are already perfect.Every word has another meaning, every action has a suspicious motive.The root of love is the body, and after breaking up, they all become enemies.You are used to protecting yourself with sarcasm, and walk away when encountering difficulties.Innocence is out of date in your heart, and love is just an exercise for you. " "Wow, I'm so scared, maybe I should go to see my rival, maybe he has a cure." Zhang Bao said, "At first I was not sure about catching up with Vicky, but now I know I will win."How many weeks do you think this kind of middle school love can last?One day the courier is late, will the apple be rusted?The solo violin sounds like Obasan chattering after listening for a long time.One day Weiqi wants to eat spicy pot, he will say that it is not good for your stomach.One day Vicky wanted to eat hairy crabs, and he would say that they were high in cholesterol.He is a doctor, and the way to love her is to cure the disease.I am a lover and the way to love her is to help her enjoy life.I don't give her vitamin C, but use love to boost her immunity.I can't play the violin, but when she is sad, I take her to sing KTV. He can keep her healthy and safe for 100 years, and I can make her burn for 50 days.If you were Vicky, who would you be with? "I hesitated.

"Excuse" Zhang Bao wanted to stop Vicky's marriage last week, so he sent me to ask her out for Taiwanese snacks. "She has something to do this week." I told Zhang Bao in frustration. "Girls have a basic reserve, and they all refuse the first time. When you ask them, you have to be like a mage, with the mind of a monk and the persistence of entering the world." "This is not the first time." "That means your skills are flawed." " That's right, every time I ask a girl out, it feels like playing lotto, and when I talk, it's like a wild shot. Every time they reject me, I don't know if it's an excuse." "Tell me, I'll judge for you." "I have to work overtime." "It may be true." "I'm going to see grandma." "The weather is bad recently, grandma may have a cold." "She said she would go to see grandpa next time." "Grandma infected grandpa, it is very serious." Reasonable." "The next two times are grandpa and grandma." "The in-laws usually have contacts, maybe they forgot to use serving chopsticks." "Why are you so optimistic? You can't hear what others are talking about?" "Of course I do." I can figure it out, but chasing a girl is about not being afraid of failure. The better her excuses, the more rascal you have to be." "You're not helping me like this, you have to tell me what to do when they reject me." "Okay, you Come again." "I have a headache." "This is clever. Among all kinds of diseases, she chooses headaches, because outsiders can't distinguish the true from the false. If she says she has a cold, you can say why you don't have a cough and nasal congestion? If she says she has a fever, you Just touch your head and you will know. The headache is completely a free mind syndrome, and you have no possibility of questioning her. This is too difficult, change another." "I want to take the dog to the doctor." "You can say: "I know a great veterinarian. "" "I have to work overtime." "Then let's make an appointment next week." "I'll be busy for a month." "Then I'll make an appointment with you in two months." "Hey... makes sense." "Most people want to make an appointment immediately Then, the girl can say that the two weeks are very busy. Instead of haggling with her in the short term, it is better to set a long-term goal. Who will be so busy that the schedule for two months will be filled?" "If she said that I Going to the United States." "When will you come back?" "A year later." Zhang Bao fell into deep thought, and then took out his phone book: "Which city are you going to, I will ask my friend there to take care of you." "That's right, On the one hand, this shows that you are not selfish, and on the other hand, you can ask your friends to watch on your behalf." "Let her feel that you love her so much that you don't need to be together every day, and you can have a tacit understanding between the ends of the world." Friend date." "I didn't realize you already thought of me as your boyfriend!" "This is so nasty." "I know, I just made her laugh first and said, "Bring your boyfriend along. "" "Are you crazy?" "She might not have a boyfriend at all, saying this is just testing you. If you retreat like this, it means that it doesn't matter whether you actually have her. Besides, even if she has a boyfriend, If you show the confidence that you are not afraid of rivals in love, she will be more curious about you." "I'm pregnant, and I won't be free for the next ten months." "You can't handle this kind of woman, so you have to give it to me immediately. In case If you can't find me temporarily, you can say first: "If the baby is a girl, it must be as cute as the mother.I know how to breastfeed and change diapers quickly.If you need help, I'm always here. "" "What if she really has a child?" "You said that I would marry you as your wife while trying to persuade her to have an abortion. In case she insists on giving birth to the child, you can say that the company sent me to the United States on a business trip." " There is a kind of woman who is too lazy to give you an excuse, just say you don’t bother me.” “At this time, you have to let go of your self-esteem and put on a refugee expression on your face. Poke your eyes with your hands to make the tears flow. Remove the snot with force.” Blow, you can even pretend to have cramps. Bit your lips tightly, and the distance between you and her is getting closer. Then you said that I know you are busy and fly to Hong Kong twice a week. I know your phone rings every day, and the road of love is constantly Lian Zhuang. But I also know that you have been hurt, and I am very wary of every man. Listening to the road conditions on the highway, I suddenly remembered the places he took you to. When you are lonely, you steal candy, and you can only surf the Internet on Saturday night. Lying in bed on Sunday morning, I dare not face the emptiness of the house. I know I am dirty and have long nails. I know I am fat and the top of my head has begun to shine. I can’t whisper or sing love songs. Career I dare not break in, and I dare not fart in front of the boss. I know that I have no experience, and I am always nervous when happiness comes. When I encounter setbacks, I quickly surrender, and when I meet a good girl, I dare not snatch it. Even so, I am confident that we It is the most suitable pair, in order to avoid you and I regretting for the rest of our lives, can you give me a chance?" "Is this effective?" "Most women have a weakness, and you must be ruthless to exploit it. Their hearts Very soft, can’t stand your troubles again and again. As long as you persist to the end, they will usually reluctantly agree. Remember, chasing women is actually very simple. The most powerful people make them impulsive, and the middle people make them heart-warming. As for you, You can make them move." "Moved?" "Moved." Zhang Bao patted me, and I suddenly had the courage to charge forward again.

"love letter" Zhang Bao asked me to ask Vicky out last week, but Vicky used all kinds of excuses to prevaricate.In the end she didn't answer my calls, and my heart was like a piece of charred firewood. "Why don't you use a love letter to express your love to her?" "A love letter?" "Or the Internet." "I hate the trendy Internet. E-mail is only suitable for spreading viruses. Everyone only cares about the speed of transmission, but emotions become more and more intense." The thicker it is. I miss the old love letter, it is a kind of depressive happiness. The perfume on the letter paper is as thick as Bianzhu, and the inspirational poems on the top are getting more and more vulgar. Sitting at the desk and looking at the blank letter paper, I regret that I didn’t take care of it when I was young. Studying. You have to find an angle to cut in and let her know that you love her deeply. You carefully recall the contact with her, every time you hesitate. You value etiquette between you, and there has never been a spark. Suddenly you realize the importance of your conditions Huge difference, the chance to catch her is like Mercury landing. Her face is like a piece of tofu, your face is like a piece of dirt. Her body is like Cindy Crawford, you will never be Robert Redford. Her heart is like Hangzhou Xihu, your heart is a haunted house. Her emotion is like a cooperative treasury, allowing you to open an account freely. Your emotion is like a pawn shop, and others always give more than you pay. She loves others like betting, and doesn’t care if it’s winning You’re a loser. You’re not a good gambler, and you always give up halfway.” “Coward!” Zhang Bao said, “Why are you so easily discouraged? Don’t you know that Luo Jialun, a May Fourth athlete, is not good-looking, but with his beautiful love letters, Married to the princess of Peking University." "I'm not as imaginative as he is." "It's okay, let me teach you some basic skills in writing love letters. First, emphasize her beauty and say that you have made me believe in the Lord again. When God created Eve, I must use you as the blueprint." "What if she is not beautiful and thinks your compliment is a deliberate insult?" "Then you emphasize her specialness. I used to fall in love with shotgun Lulu with phlegm in her mouth Just spit everywhere. You are like a classic good book, let me learn new things every day. I dare to look at your eyes when I am with you, and I will naturally take a step closer when I talk to you. We have never taken off our clothes on a date, Every time it ends, I am so satisfied that I want to cry." "These are too old-fashioned, other men must have used them to death." "Okay, then I will teach you advanced tricks. You will find the importance of reading poems, and quoting good lines is absolutely It’s your magic weapon. If you want to express traditional love, you can quote Zhao Meng’s "You have a lot of love, a lot of love, and a lot of love-"" "Wait a minute, Vicky is from the 70s, she It is impossible to have heard this song. May I quote the most popular Xu Zhimo now: "I look up, there is you in the blue sky, I open my mouth to sing, there is you in the melodious, I want to forget-"""Yes, yes, But girls nowadays are very practical. Xu Zhimo’s love letters are like the price-to-earnings ratio of Internet stocks. They are sexy for a while, but after a long time, it depends on whether you make a profit. So you don’t want to be full of sweet words, you can timely Talk about your professional field, so that she will feel that you have integrated her into life, love her to the bone but also thought about the loan problem. Einstein said in his love letter to his classmate Mileva: "You are really a person full of love. Vigorous girl, it's hard to imagine so much energy hidden in such a small body. When I was thinking of you, I read Hertz's book on power transmission, because I didn't understand the discussion of the principle of least motion in Helmholtz's electrodynamics. """This is too rational. The girls I like are like Japanese suicide planes." "Then you emphasize that you love her to the point of dying. Napoleon's love letter to Josephine said:" When I kiss your double Lips, intoxicated in your heart, but I am even more sad.The fire of love consumes me.Honey, please accept a million kisses from me, but please don't kiss me back because your kisses will make my blood boil. """Do girls think this kind of nympho is worthless?" "No worthwhile? This kind of nympho has almost become the emperor of Europe!" "Your poems are too literary and artistic. Wei Qi is natural and wild, so she won't like this It is a refined feeling." "Then you have to imitate the tone of the mainlanders. The mainland writer Wang Lixiong published a book in 1998, in which he said that he missed his lover in the mainland in Tibet, and sent a telegram saying: "Last night I Had an erotic dream, your mother went to the street to buy vegetables, and I took a bite out of you! "" "And then?" "The telegram is charged by word, and he will lose it when he writes it here." "This is too explicit! I still like abstract things." "Then you can learn from Zhu Shuzhen, a poetess in the Southern Song Dynasty. Draw a lot of circles on it, big circles, small circles, single circles, double circles, full circles, half circles, etc., and then write: "Single circle is me, double circle is you... full circle is reunion, half circle is Farewell..."""Don't you know that most girls hate mathematics, why should you challenge their weaknesses." "Well, then you don't write anything, just like the British poet Elizabeth Browning "How impotent are my words of praise!All the men are praising you, but no one can capture your style.I love you so deeply, so deeply that I can only love you, not composition. "" "I get it, as Eliot said: "We don't have to talk, but we're thinking the same thing.We gibberish and don't need to make any sense. "" "It's great to meet such a woman..." Zhang Bao supported his head and looked out of the window. Suddenly, I saw a child who had never been in love.

"defense mechanism" I feel utterly devastated when the love letter I wrote to Vicky last week went nowhere. "It's okay," Zhang Bao comforted me, "Let me teach you some defense mechanisms." ""Defense mechanism"?" Responses are called defense mechanisms.” “But I don’t have any involuntary reactions—” “Very well, denial is one of the defense mechanisms. Today I’m going to teach you how to “self-conscious” these involuntary reactions, turning passive into active , Let yourself get rid of troubles quickly." "For example..." "First of all, "deny" is self-deception. When setbacks come, you close the door hard and deny the whole thing happened. After work, you still go to her company to wait, and the later you wait, the better you will be. Be energetic. Vicky didn’t reply to the letter because it was lost by the post office. In fact, she is waiting for your news every day, and checks the message every 5 minutes.” “But how does this explain her refusing to come out with me with various excuses?”” Then you just think, she... She has a terminal illness, and she doesn't want to drag you down, so she has no choice but to reject you and make you give up completely." "She looks so healthy and has a terminal illness, so don't you and I become ghosts? This trick won't work, I'm too lucid to be self-deceived." "The second mechanism is 'repression', sadness stuffed inside, superficially like winning the Mark Six lottery. Vicky ignores you, and you want to jump out of the window in pain. The suicide note has been written , picked up the fruit knife in the kitchen. At this time, parents came in and asked you if you had a cold. You said you were kidding, I was waiting for my hot steamed buns. Your friend patiently enlightened you, and you changed the subject and said that today you heard a The joke is very funny. Your friend said you can really forget her? You smartly said that there is no grass anywhere in the world. After your friend left, you took sleeping pills and fell in bed. You still can’t sleep at night, and your mind is full of Vicky Good." "This trick requires acting talent, my acting skills are not realistic enough." "Then you try "regression". When you are under pressure, you can show the behavior of early life, such as childhood. Vicky ignores you , you started to drop things at home. When your family asked you what happened, you put on a dirty face and didn’t say a word. Friends came to comfort you, and you said that you don’t need to be hypocritical.” “My relatives and friends are the only pillars I have left. All lose." "The fourth is called "opposite formation", which suppresses your real but socially unacceptable feelings, and shows a socially acceptable reaction. You obviously want Vicky to get rid of her fiancé and run away with you, and the two move To a small town in the south of the United States. But you wished them eternal happiness, and you paid 25,000 yuan for the wedding. You sat at the main table and watched them change clothes constantly, and kept telling Vicky’s mother that your son-in-law would take good care of Vicky. They toasted their relatives and friends at the end, and you led the way at the table. When they entered the bridal chamber at the end, you lit candles for them." "Scholars can't be humiliated, I can't admit defeat like this." "Then you" transfer ", Give up the thing you want but can't get, and replace it with another thing you don't want but is easier to get. Vicky rejects you and you go after her friend Sally. Convince yourself that Vicky is too beautiful and will betray you sooner or later You. Sally only has temperament, and it is less likely to cause trouble after marriage. Vicky is half-hearted, and Sally is determined. Vicky wants to be in the media all day long, but Sally likes to cook and do laundry." "Sally has many advantages, but she is le sbian." "Then you can "shrink down" and reduce the importance of things you can't get.It's okay for Vicky to reject you.After all, love is just an adjustment, and marriage is just a move in life.You can't grasp women's psychology and don't understand their logic.Love her to the point of darkness, she only regards you as one of her suitors.Time is wasted here, and business opportunities are missed in the blink of an eye.After all, it is more practical to do business, and every penny of deposits gets one penny of interest. " "But I have no interest in doing business at all. "Then you "sublime," transfer the energy of love to other nobler ideals.You can work on the environment and invent new drugs to treat cancer.Protest against noble ladies wearing fur and adopting stray dogs and cats. "There are too many temptations in this world, and it's hard for me to have few desires and a pure heart."Cosmetics for female colleagues, short skirts for passengers on the MRT.The back view of couples on the road, the passion in Hollywood movies.Every time I see these things, I can't suppress my temperament. "" Then you try to "rationalize" and make up a favorable explanation for the disaster.Vicky was getting married because the man was dying.In order for him to die in peace, Vicky accompanied him to spend his last days. " "I don't want to build my happiness on the death of others. ""Okay, then you only have the last way, which is "reaction control", deliberately pretending to react contrary to your inner feelings.You are devastated, but act as if you are well fed.You want to hit someone, but hide at home and torture yourself. " "I'm not crazy. Zhang Bao shook his head, "This way you will have nowhere to go..." I was desperate, like a skeleton, falling into a ditch that no one noticed.

"Friends" I built up my defenses last week and still feel lost.At this time, my old friend came back from the United States for vacation, and made an appointment with me in Xihua in the evening. "Let's have dinner together tonight!" Zhang Bao called. "My good friend came back from the United States, I want to meet her." "Male or female?" , not the kind of relationship you imagined." "Of course not..." Zhang Bao smiled. You shook your head, not wanting to pursue Zhang Bao. You were best friends and you sat behind her in elementary school.During class you pluck her hair and put Siemens floor wax on her head.You target her when shooting rubber bands, and steal her erasers when class is over.On the stairs you look up at the florets on her panties and advertise to the class that her ass is huge.She pushes you on the ground and hits you, and you knock off her front teeth with a punch.She went home and told her dad, and her dad called your mom.In order to reconcile you, the parents of both parties will take you to see "Jaws".You remember at the end when Jaws opened his mouth wide and the hero dropped a bomb to blow his head off.

After that day she stopped picking, and you stopped slapping "hags" on her back.She lends you a handkerchief for morning checks, and nominates you as a picket during class meetings.After taking a nap to practice calligraphy, you write very fast and she keeps telling you to wait for her.You exchange comics after school, and you often go to her house to read "Science Peter Pan".She laughs that you are not as handsome as Tiexiong, and you say that her breasts are not as big as Zhenzhen.After watching cartoons and watching variety shows, she likes to stand on the table and learn from Bao Nana.Her microphone is a broom, and she is biting a rose while singing "Midnight Kiss".

When she was in junior high school, she started to learn the pipa, and you sat outside the music classroom and listened stupidly.After practice, you hold the music stand for her, and the two of you take the bus home together.She straightens your wind-blown hair for you, and you can't say a word in happiness.You bought her an egg tart for breakfast the next day, and she prepared watermelon for you for lunch.After tutoring, you go to have supper, and when you order beef noodles, remember that she doesn't add spicy food.You were a toad and became Batman by her side.You ride a white horse in armor and she is the sleeping princess waiting for you to kiss her cheek.

She started to grow long hair in high school, and was caught by the instructor every day when she went to school.You've been cast into a band playing a trumpet that's heavier than you are.At the school celebration garden party, your class played 18 picks, and she came to join in and win all the sweets and spicy treats.After school, you go to the botanical garden to recite Beiyang warlords. She will never remember that the scientific name of salt is sodium chloride.When she forgets, her eyes keep blinking, and your fantasy is too happy to go home. After graduating from high school, you go to the same university, you study foreign languages ​​and she studies justice.You become obsessed with Shakespeare and buy a medieval wig.She began to believe in lamas and ate only green vegetables and bitter gourd for each meal.She participated in the student movement and pushed for the revision of university laws.You fell in love with Ophelia and memorized entire books of Greek mythology.Many boys in the law school chased her, and she gradually lost the time to return your calls.You are chasing a girl from the Chinese Department just because she looks like her.

In her senior year, a man made her belly big, and she came to ask if you could help her in the middle of the night.You ran to the dormitory and beat the man severely, and cursed loudly before leaving.He fell to the ground and asked how the Department of Foreign Languages ​​taught this kind of grammar, and you kicked it up and said that you should concentrate on bleeding and less nonsense.You take her to a clinic in the circle, and when you register, you say you are the father of the child.The nurse said that you look very similar to our dean, and I will give you a 20% discount, which is 4800 yuan. Then you grow up and start struggling in different corners.When I was in college, I was very excited, but now I am scolded by my boss every day.You can only gossip among colleagues, and your parents urge you to start a family every day.Life has become very complicated, and happiness is as ethereal as sand in the palm of your hand.You started to say "forget it" often, giving up your youthful ideals one by one.When someone asks you "Are you happy", you always don't answer for a long time.When someone asks about your career plan, you start talking about him.You often wake up in a dream with fear, feeling like the ceiling is collapsing.Your life is full of people and horses, but in the dead of night you feel so poor. You meet occasionally, each time for a short period of time.You listen patiently to her grievances and let her cry in your arms.She criticizes the woman you chase, and scolds you for having high eyesight but low power.You once negotiated with her boyfriend on her behalf, and when you were excited, you overturned the plate on the table.She once pleaded with your girlfriend on your behalf, saying that you had a heart attack because of her.She teaches you how to please a woman's body, and you realize that it doesn't have to be so hard.But she also hits you hard by acknowledging that size does matter.You tell her that when a man talks to you about the principles of life, all she thinks about is how to take off your underwear.The real reason why a man keeps delaying his marriage is that he doesn't want to marry you at all. Time passes and you start worrying about each other.She is very enthusiastic about going on a blind date for you, but you reluctantly attend because of her face.You come back and say that the girl's qualifications are not one-tenth of yours, and if you want to marry her, you might as well marry you.Her expression was very sweet, and she didn't look like she was approaching menopause at all. A few years later, she immigrated to Vancouver and married a doctor who could be her father.You stay in Taipei to work, so busy that you have high blood pressure.A Christmas card every year where she tells you about her recent yoga start.Calligraphy on Monday and Thursday, flower arrangement on Tuesday and Friday.She said don't laugh at me for being arty, and there are famous paintings on the walls of my house.Finally, I said that I will go back to Taipei for vacation in April, and I would like to invite you to a restaurant for tea. "Great," Zhang Bao yelled when he heard this, "she is still married! You have endured it for so many years, and now the volcano has finally erupted." "We are friends. This friendship is not easy to come by. I will not use it." Sex ruined it!" "Just wait and see, I'm not Zhang Bao!" I smiled, thinking that I could give him another title tomorrow.I got in the taxi, thinking that I was about to meet my friend, my heart began to beat excitedly.