Chapter 15 The most meaningful life - nine months after the college entrance examination

The most meaningful life - nine months after the college entrance examination At 2:45 in the afternoon, the sky darkened, getting darker and darker at a constant speed, which had a kind of meaning of evening.I was so surprised: it doesn't get dark until five o'clock in winter, why is it dark before three o'clock now? I spent the whole afternoon huddled in A's coat, curled up in my own seat in the dormitory, and smelled the clothes.I put my nose where the zipper is; my mouth is in the space between the jacket and the cotton pajamas—there is a lot of gentle moisture—my eyes are facing the open English book on the desk, and I am slowly reciting word.at the very beginning,

Xiong Xiong copied notes on the history of the Chinese revolution at the window.She copied it for about an hour, and sighed every five minutes, ah, there are so many notes on the history of the Chinese revolution! It really kills me! My mouth stayed in the steam, and I answered her in a vague way: ummm Hmmmm.Later, she finally finished copying her notes, so she stood up, walked around in the dormitory, patted me on the shoulder when she walked by me, and said: Hey, hey! I said, ummmmmmm .She saw that I was too lazy to talk to her, so she ran to other people's dormitories to visit. Exclusively—only; completely. Theorist—theorist. Equation - equation. Slight—tiny, slight. Application-using, application. Theory—theory. Theoretical. Reactor—reactor... I recited, distracted, sniffing the smell on A's coat—I think the smell seems to have faded.So I worried and thought, if this continues, the smell on it will disappear, and it will all be my own smell-how boring!What should I do? Then I frowned and memorized a few words. When I got to deduce, I began to comfort myself: Even if the smell is gone, the clothes will still be there.I went down for a while, and when I got to the bewilder, I thought funny: After a while, return the clothes to A, and after a while, go get them back.

I was alone in the bedroom.In this way, it was 2:45 in the afternoon, and then it was dark.I looked up out of the window and watched the sky darken. After a while, it suddenly brightened again, then darkened again, brightened again, and darkened again... It just went round and round like this, as if playing a very boring game.I stared at the world with particularly clear outlines under the gray light, and suddenly missed my middle school—I missed it so much, I wanted to die.I put my head on the table in pain, with the English book on my cheek, looking up at the sky, thinking: One day, they will all leave me... and then, I will be alone.

I missed my wallet again, the Winnie the Pooh key ring that A gave me, and the key to A's permanent lock... The phone rang. I got up and walked over, hoping it was my phone - hoping someone would call to save me. is A. A said: "What are you doing?" I said: "It's nothing, memorizing English." A was very surprised and said: "Oh, it's rare, I met you memorizing English on the phone-I can go buy a lottery ticket today." He said vigorously: "Okay! Give me half of the prize points!" A smiled, and then said something in a mess.Later, he suddenly said, "Now Zhang Lan is going crazy." I said, "Why?" He said, "It just feels like that." I said, "Oh." He asked, "What? It's boring." I was silent, and after hearing him questioning him several times, I said, "I was thinking, I haven't seen Zhang Lan for a long time." "Didn't we just meet last month?" said A. .I said, "No..." After starting this way, I didn't know what to say.I heard A laughing, then lowered my voice and said to me: "Then, shall I bring Zhang Lan to see you?"

The sky did not light up again, but darkened indefinitely.I hung up the phone and walked to the window—the sky was dark and very soft.In the boy's dormitory opposite, boys kept coming out of the dark and trendy doorway, like people conjured by magic.I moved my eyes down to the ground, past head after head...no one I knew...my eyes faltered and couldn't meet anyone I knew...they weren't here... I remember when Quanmin was writing the classmate records in the third year of high school, E once wrote to me: You and Shu Mei are so close, you will be admitted to two universities in the future, and you still have to stay together every day, so you have to be in the two universities. Find a midpoint on the connection line, and then the two of you will walk an equal distance every day, do your homework together at this midpoint, do your homework well, and let Shumei wash your mind.I read this passage and laughed poorly. B also laughed, saying why E was written like a physics problem. C said, if you really want to find a midpoint, the midpoint must be on the elevated road.I laughed again. B said beside him, well, it makes sense.

Since B and C broke up, I always feel far away from C. Two days later, A really brought C to see me.They called the dormitory and told me to pick them up at the school gate.I ran all the way to the school gate and saw the two of them sitting crookedly on their bicycles.I went up and knocked on C's head, and said in amazement, ah, you guys came here by bike? C touched his head and yelled, my head! A smiled and pointed at C, and said, he must ride a bike, he's crazy .I said, then you go crazy with him. A smiled, so say I am good.Either you swing, he rides a bicycle, or we are always doomed to a 25,000-mile long march.

It was the time when get off work and get out of class were over, and many people who were going home wanted to get closer and crossed directly from the university.The school gate is a bit crowded.I didn't care about the crowd, so I tilted my head to look at C behind A. C stared at me and said, what are you doing? I said, nothing, Zhang Lan, I want to see you. C said to A, hey, this is what she said, and I can't blame me! So I looked at A with C - he smiled generously.The two of them were each holding the handlebars of their bicycles, and I reached out to grab A's hand on the handlebars.Cycling from such a long distance, the three of us finally met again—it was not easy. We looked at each other, excited and tired, as if our revolution had already won.

C said he wanted to take a look at my student apartment building, and I said it's not like you've never been here before.He said, no, I want to take a look.I said, you've seen it before, but you can't go in anyway.He insisted, no, you must see it, I have a relationship with your apartment building, and I will go to see it after a while.A and I laughed out loud, and I laughed so hard that I leaned over A's handlebar. A said, "Hey, calm down, it's so heavy, I can't push it anymore!" C gloated and said, "Is it heavy?" , I swung a bag of rice last time, ("Dang" means riding a bicycle to lead people in Shanghai dialect.) She is heavier than a bag of rice.The three of us laughed unscrupulously on the road on campus again.

So I took C to see the student apartment building.Along the way; I told him that I didn't like this new house at all, that the people who built it didn't think well of the people who lived in it. A said, that's because even if you are not considerate for you, you have nothing to do with them.I said yes yes yes.We walked around cynically like this and got downstairs to the apartment building. There was a bulletin board at the door of the apartment. C ran over to look at it, and A and I followed. C asked: "What's on the inside?" I said: "I don't know." A said: "You live here, why don't you know?" I said: "I live here, so I must look here

The bulletin board?" C didn't pay any more attention to us, and stood in front of the bulletin board, put his face on it, sniffed it, and began to read: "Party commitment letter..." Suddenly turned his head to me, and pointed his hand towards me. Pointing to the bulletin board at the back of my head, I asked: "What does this mean?" I shook my head. He turned around and continued: "Guo-qiao-mei. I laughed and reached out to pat A on the shoulder. A grabbed my hand and told me not to pat me, and then said to C: "Here, don't be stupid."If you are stupid, I will be unlucky. C argued innocently: "It's a person's name."It is the signature of the person who wrote the party commitment letter.It's Guo Qiaomei. I laughed so hard that I squatted down, put one hand on the ground, and was about to fall. A pulled me up, and the two of us went up to watch together. I said, "Fart! It's Shu! It should be Guo Jiaoshu!" A He said, "No, it's a bridge.You see, it's next to the wooden characters. "I said:" Impossible. C said: "It seems to be."But why is it called this kind of name? Is it wrong?" I said: "How can I write my name wrong?" A said: "Maybe someone else wrote it for her?" C said: "I wrote it myself. of. "

We stood downstairs in the girls' apartment building like this, arguing with each other for a long time on the bulletin board.At the end A said: "Hey, are we bored? Why are we discussing this kind of thing here?" After he finished speaking, he laughed with the two of us.I looked at A for a while, and C for a while—they opened their mouths wide when they laughed, and even the concrete pillars around them looked bright and pleasing to the eye—talking boring things and doing boring things with them It's so exciting, just like when we were together all day long, I don't want to say anything interesting anymore. At this time, C's caller rings.He looked at the call machine, looked at me and A in turn, and said, "It's Shumei." I pointed to the door of the apartment building and said, "There is a coin-operated telephone in the door room. You tell Shumei, I miss her very much." He stretched his head through the door and wanted to go in, but I held him back and said, "Don't forget, say I miss her." He smiled and said, "Got it." C goes to make a phone call.A and I stood at the door.Everyone who passed by looked at me, then at him.A few people who knew me would smile at me, then smile more happily at him, and he would smile back—I just like how generous he is. I said: "Zhang Lan seems to be very excited now." A said: "Everyone knows this. He has to pretend to be very happy all day long - it can't be said that he made it now, anyway, he just got used to it. This way." I looked at the distance, the boundary line between the building and the sky, and let out a long sigh. A asked beside her: "Where is Shu Mei? How is Shu Mei doing now?" I said, "Aren't you in the same school as her? How come you ask me." We looked at each other and smiled.I touched his arm with my fingers and said, "Is she and Van together?" When I said that, I turned my eyes back to look at the boundary line between the sky and the building, waiting for his answer.But he didn't answer.The boundary line looks very blurry at the beginning, and it often jumps out of sight, and you have to find it again; after watching it for a while, it becomes clearer and deeper, and in the end, it seems to be the whole world The most real thing—the most real thing in the whole world is this high and low line. At some point, A quietly put his hand on the back of my neck.When I reacted, I suddenly felt warm all over my body, as if I was hugging his coat again, my nose was wet, and my head was full of his hot smell. We stood silently until C came out. A said, why is it so long? C smiled and said, nothing.I patted C and asked him, have you already said it? He said, I have said it.I said, what did she say? He said, nothing, she said it was fine. I took a look at C.In my opinion, when he came out of the door room this time, he was not as happy as before, and he looked a little wilted all over his body.I want to ask A's opinion, but C is present, so I can't ask.In fact, I also know that when B heard that I miss her, he wouldn't say anything at all, maybe he didn't even say "it's fine", maybe C forgot to tell her that I missed her a long time ago, everything was fabricated by him. A and C walked in front of me - the two of them were whispering to each other, discussing something, and with a very attentive expression, they would not let me hear.I exchanged objects and looked at their backs, and as I walked, I suddenly said, Shu Mei is at the school gate now. C was startled, and turned his head to stare at me in surprise.I laughed, I'm talking nonsense. A also looked at me, put his hand on C's shoulder, and said, don't pay attention to her.After speaking, the heads of the two people came together again.I yelled, neuropathy neuropathy neuropathy! Every time I yelled, I missed B even more.I really want to see her. After six o'clock, C said he was going back.I said, don't go, it's still so early. C looked at his watch and insisted on leaving. A patted my head and said, just let us go. C laughed and said to A, or I will go first, and you can stay with her for a while. A thought about it and said, that's fine.So A and I sent C to the school gate. Before jumping into the car, C glared at us and smiled, then suddenly reached out and tapped on my head, saying, Give it back! I didn’t have time to fight back, so he rode away from us for a long distance . A laughed. I covered my head with my hands, and followed the back of C riding a bicycle with my eyes - he was so fast that my eyes stumbled all the way.On the road, the street lights were already on. Because of the darkness, there were small dark blue particles floating in the yellow light. The eyes were full of yellow and blue, and it was difficult to tell which was which.Far, far away at the end of the road, cloud after cloud of smoke faintly rose, like the edge of a stage, where vaporized dry ice flowed out endlessly, gurgling sadly, and could not stop for a minute. In such a light, C rode straight towards such a smoky end.He was wearing a long coat, the hem of which was blown by the wind like the wings of a great bird—the light cast shadows, now in front of him, now behind him, also like a pair of wings.This handsome C whom I admire infinitely—it turns out that he has two pairs of wings. A didn't know when to put his hand on my head again.A lot of admiration for C evaporated in my heart, and I wanted to pop out from the top of my head, but was completely blocked by his palm.So I reached out and took his hand off, held it with both hands, and then continued to look at C's back, and said with infinite fascination: "I found that Zhang Lan is really beautiful. It's crazy. And he is getting more and more beautiful now." , looks even better than before. If Shu Mei can keep getting along with him, that would be great." I held A's hand tightly and continued to look into the distance until C's unique figure completely disappeared from my field of vision. I had to sigh out the deep breath in my throat and repeat: "It's really good." A gently pulled out his hand, touched my head again, and said softly: "You have a poor vocabulary." I fixed my eyes on the end of the smoky road, and said with a smile: "I think so too. I would say, okay, you’re so good, you’re so good.” I felt the temperature in the palm of A’s hand that was perfect for me, raised my head and said to him: “Xiangmeicheng, you’re really good, you’re so good, It’s so good.” A stared at me and grinned—my soul suddenly flew nine days away... It’s been a long, long time since I saw him smile like this! The only thing I can remember clearly is the time when I went to the art museum... …he laughs, his hair and eyes singing in the wind...my A doesn't smile like that often, and he laughs like a fairy! I put my hand on his cheek and said: "Xiangmeicheng, take me out for a drive." He kept laughing, laughing so much that the sky would turn upside down.I looked at him fascinatedly, and said to his smiling face, "Xiangmeicheng, I love you!" Then we hugged.In his arms I smelled his coat - and now I was soaked in warm moisture. Greedily, I poked my face into the depths of his embrace—and now, in my long delirium, it seemed as if the whole world was the zigzag texture of his sweater. A sat me on the rung of his bike so he could take me for a ride.I refused to sit in the back, on the bag shelf.He said, then you sit on it.I just sit on it.He said while stepping on the car, really, you are quite heavy.I said, fart! He didn't refute, just smiled with a good temper.I looked at his back, couldn't help but reached out and tapped him, and said, hey, is it allowed to take people by bicycle here? He said, as long as you dare, you are allowed to take people by bicycle anywhere.I smiled poorly. A took me and flew across one yellow and blue road after another. I screamed and screamed behind him.This area is relatively secluded. At night, the police uncles are off work, and there is no one on the road. My shouts and laughter are overwhelming, and my knees are soaked all at once. When there was a big turn, two large trucks turned around one after another, and A shook violently.He said, "Look to see if there is a car behind you." I said, "Oh, I can't see it." He said, "Sit down and don't fall off." It's over! The car crashed and people died!" Then the two of us laughed and slid across the intersection.I said, "I'm still worried about being caught by the police. You're taking people by bike now." He turned around and said, "Then let me say that the people in my car are not people." I smiled.I only heard him continue to say vigorously: "Xie Yi, at that time, remember to help me." I also worked hard and echoed: "I quickly told the police uncle, I am not human, I am not human." He said loudly: "Hey, yes yes!" We laughed poorly. After turning the dangerous intersection, A suddenly stabilized.I was surprised and said, "Hey, why are you so stable now?" He laughed and said, "I scared you!" I said, "Bah!" and knocked him on the head.He laughed silly a few times, like Winnie the Pooh. I put my hand in front of A and put my arms around his waist.He turned his head and asked, "What?" I pressed my face against his back and said, "What happened to Zhang Lan just now? Shu Mei called him, what's the matter?" He didn't answer me right away, and only said after I urged him once. "It's nothing. Don't mind other people's business." I raised my voice and said, "Shu Mei's business, why is it other people's business? If you don't tell me, I will ask Shu Mei." He sighed loudly and said, "You This man! You this man!" I hit him on the back and shoulders on the schoolbag rack, like a pendulum movement, rhythmically, once, again.He stretched his hand behind me, and I dodged him, making a determined circuitous struggle with him.In the end, he couldn't bear it anymore and said, "What else is there? Liu Shumei is in a bad mood." I froze for a moment, as if something had flowed from my arms, but I couldn't describe it, and couldn't help feeling a little dazed.After a while, I said softly, "If Shu Mei is unhappy, why can't she come to me?" A said, "Have you ever been in love with her?" I thought about it, and suddenly became slightly excited, and said, "So, Shu Mei Will Mei reconcile with Zhang Lan?" A paused, then said, "Why do you care about this?" After speaking, he stepped on the car vigorously.Not reconciled, I immediately asked: "Just now Zhang Lan wanted to go back, was it because of Shu Mei?" A seemed to be thinking about something, and even the back looked very calm.I heard him say slowly: "You can say yes." After a while, he said: "It's hard to say. Maybe Liu Shumei is going to be with Van. Zhang Lan didn't think it through himself." The draft, "swish" straight through my hot mind, I tried to stretch out my arms, but I couldn't catch anything. Because of the small number of people, this road looks very wide.My wife sat flatly on the schoolbag rack of A’s bicycle, looking straight at the opposite side of the road, houses passing by one after another, everything was shrouded in that kind of yellow light, and there was still something in the air. The dark blue night is drifting away. A's words went round and round in my mind, and my soul followed behind it, hands behind their backs, round and round, and again. After a long time, I plucked up the courage to ask A: "How do you know that Shu Mei is going to be with Van?" A replied a little impatiently: "I don't know either. It was C who said it. He didn't say much, just listened. Come out with such a meaning. You see he is so restless." After saying this, he stopped at the crossroads and looked at the red light on the other side of the road. On the motorway, there was a bus parked. It turned from the previous intersection and overtook us.I sat behind A, bored, and began to look into the car compartment.The car was quite empty, except for two people, the other passengers were sitting, the yellow color of the street lamp was thinly applied to the seats, everyone's face looked as gentle and lonely as the night.I heard A say: "Zhang Lan still needs to think carefully. In fact, he still values ​​Liu Shumei very much, but he doesn't know if he can go back and be with her again..." The two people standing on the bus were originally With their backs to my side, while A was speaking, they turned around, walked to the window on this side, and cuddled together—their gentle and lonely faces at night against the wet streetlights behind them Light, very slowly, as if the river was slowly flowing away from their faces, and the truth emerged, and their faces protruded from the night one by one... The first thing I saw was Van's special face covered by curly hair... Immediately, on his shoulder...is B's softest face, which seems to be covered with a layer of mist... ...In an instant, as if the curtain fell, thousands of lights lit up.I could not see B's pale face more clearly in the brightest and clearest light. And she saw me too. We stand very very close. When the bus she was on passed me and A, it seemed that we were retreating quickly and passing her.I watched her face disappearing from my field of vision little by little, becoming more and more indifferent, gradually disappearing into the river.In the end, that bus also disappeared at the smoky end of the road. The world is like a huge waterfall, flowing towards the end of the smoky road without stopping, flowing away sadly.I suddenly remembered the "Smoke Gets In Your Eyes" that C used to sing - I wanted to die and go crazy about his voice, his posture on the stage, his singing expression, and the one he stared at for a long time b. A is calling my name.I hugged him tightly and said softly, "I want to hear Zhang Lan sing." And then, I don't know what A Jiligulu said - vaguely, from the end of the road, it seems that Zhang Lan's singing really came.