Chapter 13 12

Let's go back to Shen He.Shen He was sitting in the living room of No. 3 Taoli Street that year, Lu Yihan's guest and Cong Wei's editor.Jing doesn't remember much about what he looked like at that time, but he was much thinner then than many years later.He and Lu Yihan are actually university alumni, both graduated from S University in this city, Lu Yihan graduated from the art department, and Shen He graduated from the Chinese department.So the two feel more intimate with each other.When they talked, they came and went slowly, but Shen He was young and mature, and there was a tacit understanding when talking with Lu Yihan, so it didn't matter how much they talked.I remember that time, they hardly mentioned Cong Wei, they only talked about the unimportant travel.It was Shen He who mentioned that he and a few friends had just returned from Tibet and Yunnan.Carrying a large travel bag, hiking long distances, etc.

If it is now, going to Tibet and Yunnan are very common things, but at that time, about ten years ago, going to Tibet still sounded a bit heroic and brave.At that time, a big boy like Shen He who had just grown up was so arrogant and unruly, singing Zheng Jun's "Back to Lhasa", and had inexhaustible enthusiasm for all kinds of things that he had never tried.Lu Yihan smiled and said to Shen He, I envy you very much, if I were as young as you, I would go far away without care.Shen He disagrees: You can still go now, as long as you are still young.They may not agree with each other, but they all smile.

Fourteen-year-old Jing has never left the city.When she listened to Shen He's description of the wonderful trip, she couldn't help asking: Is it very far there?Is it hard to get there?Can ordinary people go?can i go Yes, as long as you travel with your heart and soul, you will be as good as a traveler.Shen He said.He looked full of life, as if he had inexhaustible strength. When Jing grows up, let Shen and brother take you on a trip to Tibet, okay?Lu Yihan asked with a smile. really?Jing turned to Shen He. Ok.Okay.Shen He said. What Jing was actually thinking about was to travel with Lu Yihan.In Jing's little head, "going to Tibet" means the same thing as "adventure" and "wandering".The picture that appeared in her mind was the big horse and the wilderness. She was sitting in front of Lu Yihan, and Lu Yihan was driving the horse, hugging her from behind, so that she was safe.As far as they could look, they saw the bright autumn sun setting on the edge of the horizon.Jing's imagination can only be limited to this, and she can't think of a richer scene, but she already feels the sweetness in her heart.

When she was a teenager, Jing always felt that Shen He and Lu Yihan were people connected in some places, and they should be able to become good friends, but for some reason, they always seemed to be separated by something and could not get closer. Shen He's family is rich and he doesn't have to worry about the worries of life. Therefore, it is possible for him to spare no time and energy to find Cong Wei and publish books for her.He is not confident that he has a keen eye, but because he likes Cong Wei's books.Shen He, who was born in the 1970s, is like many literary youths born in this era. The way they accept a thing is first of all picky, resistant, and disgusting.Shen He's range of interests is very narrow, whether it is the person he likes or the novel he likes.When he first came to work in the publishing house, he read the backlog of manuscripts and several manuscripts that had been approved for publication. He was very upset because he didn't like any of them. In his opinion, these books were terrible.The director of the editorial office to which he belonged, the thin middle-aged woman, looked at him very sadly and said: A person like you is not suitable to be an editor—and Shen He understood that what she meant was actually not suitable to be an editor. Her editorial office does the editing, so that's going to hold them back.However, who would have thought that Shen He, who was considered to be a drag on everyone, would edit a sensational bestseller more than a year later.The cooperation between Shen He and Cong Wei has been out of control since then.It can be said that Cong Wei's creativity is sinking and awakening. After "The Shadow of the Narcissus", she wrote several novels in succession, each of which has a great change compared with the previous ones. Her works are always the most shining women, But the women are different, some are gentle and helpless, some are reckless and tough, violence, killing, abnormal love, soul possession...all of them.These works are as gorgeous as flowers, which makes people even more curious about what Cong Wei is like after the works.But Shen He remained silent all the time, keeping his mouth shut about Cong Wei's news.

Jing's writing started at this time.Writing seems to be a potential ability hidden in Jing's body. It has been sleeping for more than ten years, but it was suddenly awakened by Cong Wei. Lu Yihan bought a thick cloth grid diary for her and Xiao Zhuo alone.Jing's is a small purple and black grid, while Xiao Zhuo's is a small navy blue and light gray grid.Jing was reluctant to use it to keep a diary.Because they have the rule of handing in the diary to the language teacher every week.She doesn't want the teacher to use a red ballpoint pen to leave the word "read" and some innocuous comments on her notebook.So she handed in another very simple lined notebook, but this diary has been reluctant to use it.Until one hot noon later, I dreamed of my grandma during a nap.Grandma stood by the stove peeling garlic.She seemed to be possessed by an evil spirit, and she kept repeating her movements, unable to stop no matter what.Her hands are fast, like a robot on an assembly line.But her feet were no longer stable, and her body began to sway from side to side.The oil pan on the stove was already hot, but she didn't seem to notice it at all.Jing knew that grandma was about to fall, so she cried and called her: Grandma, what's wrong with you?Grandma, what's the matter with you?Grandma still didn't stop, her body began to shake more violently, and Jing felt that she was about to fall down like a broken dead tree.

wake up.Jing was still yelling dryly: "Grandma, what's wrong with you?" Jing sat up, sweating constantly.Not knowing how to control her emotions, she jumped up and wanted to run out of the room.But she suddenly saw the diary beside her pillow.The dark purple grid tempts Jing like a deep empty room.Jing stopped, turned around, walked to the bed and picked it up.She held it in her arms as if she were holding a child who was all hers.Jing's heart was pressed against it, and she could feel it beating chugs, echoing her heartbeat so meticulously.Its appearance suddenly calmed Jing down.She went to the desk, sat down, spread it out, chose a favorite light blue fountain pen, and finally decided to write on it.

Jing sat quietly in front of the desk throughout the afternoon, holding the light blue pen tightly and kept writing.In the evening, she finished writing 5,000 words, and the title was "The Stove of Love".In that text, Jing remembered her grandma, and she recalled the little things her grandma had done for her, including her death.When Jing wrote that grandma's feet were so aggrieved and cried like a child, Jing lay down on the table and cried. When grandma died, she had never cried like this.The light blue writing was wet with tears, and those past events jumped out like this raised paper.Later, Jing finally understood that when she was immersed in literature, she would have more emotions than usual.After finishing writing, Jing felt unprecedented lightness.

Song, she went to take a hot bath, and then had dinner with them.After that she went back to her room to do her homework.She was extremely focused that day.I fell asleep deeply at night and didn't wake up in the middle of the night to overeat.Everything was peaceful and unexpected.Jing could hardly believe that this was the change those five thousand words brought to her.Their outpouring gave her a peace she had never known before. Waking up the next morning, Jing sat by the bed in a daze.Then she jumped out of bed suddenly and ran to the desk to read her diary.It is still there, and those words are still there, revealing a touch of sadness.Jing put it in her schoolbag and took it to school.It was the first time that writing brought her the pleasure of flying into the sky.From then on, she will take this diary with her wherever she goes.Jing wrote one story after another on it.Her father, her former home, her elementary school, Uncle Lu and Xiaozhuo.

But Jing never showed her notebook to others.Those things are just written to make myself feel better. It was not until a long time later that Xiao Zhuo told Jing that he had quietly been to her room and saw her notebook.He couldn't help opening it, so he knew these stories.Jing had already graduated from junior high school when Xiao Zhuo told Jing.They sat in a cramped soda shop eating ice cream.Xiao Zhuo suddenly apologized to Jing.He said, there is one thing I have been hoping for your understanding.Jing said, what is it?Xiao Zhuo said, I read your diary.Jing looked at him, speechless.But I don't know how to blame him.But he was very calm, and continued: Miss, I think those stories are really fascinating.You have a gift for writing.I didn't think about it that way, Jing murmured.But thinking about it now, this is where she wants to thank Xiao Zhuo again, because he is also the first person in the world to say that she writes well, and Jing will always remember that he held her diary, his eyes were shining, Those stories, he said, were fascinating.

However, this is not the case. Jing did think about writing all the time.Because this is the only thing Jing is willing to do. "It will be turned into a book in the future." Xiao Zhuo stroked Jing's diary and said firmly. Book?Jing raised her head and looked at Xiao Zhuo blankly.She thought of Cong Wei.She is like a princess living in a distant palace, so high above, Jing doesn't know how much effort and how long it will take to get to her position.In the future, that is a path without light and heat, and Jing lost the courage to give it a wonderful fantasy.But now, at the age of fifteen, Jing is still useless, with not-so-bad homework and no friends.Worst of all, she also suffers from binge eating.Eating excessively is like a child possessed by starving to death.At this time, Jing already knows how to avoid: she has a great fear of all scales.She is also particularly resistant to words like "pig", "fat pig" and "bear".Jing tried her best not to let this season's emerging dresses with small waists attract her attention.

If possible, Jing hopes to find a house to lock herself up.She read and write in it, morning and night.Never, ever, never see those people out there who belittle and mock her again.