Chapter 3 black cat don't sleep

Chenmu, Momo has been singing in my heart, you may never understand. --Inscription I stood in the tall green grass, holding the young black cat who likes to look up at the sky.I am wearing a long dress that is so soft and white that it has no boundary with the clouds, and the slender white tassels are entangled with the slender green tall grass.Behind me is a half wall covered with wild roses.I have a fresh smile that goes well with flowers. ——This is a picture that Chenmu took for me. In fact, I am not beautiful, but I think I am beautiful.Chenmu also thought I was beautiful.I think that's enough.

On this rainy afternoon, I returned to the city, to my old home on the outskirts of the city.I held up a bright orange umbrella, and comforted myself with its warm orange color on days without sunshine.Then I saw this photo of myself on a utility pole five meters away from my home.The rain was spreading on that face of mine, and the smile seemed to have faded.A missing person notice.It was Chen Mu who was looking for me like crazy. This is a very important girl to me, please let me know if you see her.Chen Mu put it simply above. important.I pondered the meaning of the word.I admit to being moved by this photo of looking for me.I want to throw away the umbrella and cry bitterly holding the telephone pole.The faint soapy scent of morning wood seems to be approaching, he may be calling me.Little princess, he said, continue to love each other.

I can not.Because there is a cat in my heart that does not sleep day and night, singing endlessly.It is black, so dark that it makes people feel distressed and desperate.It's my ink.It's not a cat with nine lives, it only has one life, and it dies.It is a wound that Chen Mu and I cannot heal. I didn't read the notice, turned around and ran away.The walls of the house are still the sky blue that I once painted, with the ubiquitous air-conditioning. I live in a patriarchal family.My father walked with his head held high and his voice was loud.He never crowded the bus, and he never went to the market to buy vegetables. When he was angry, he would pull my mother's long hair and beat her.But my mother still has smooth long hair.She wears an apron or a cotton shirt, cooks complicated meals, plants a garden of flowers, is raised at home by her father, laughs and cries very lightly.I learned at an early age to address my father with respect and compliments, and to run away a second before he exploded.

I have a cat named Momo.She was as dark as night, her eyes were bright, always wide open in terror, and she seldom slept.I think this kind of black makes me quiet and sinking.I took her to run in the tall grass in summer, and counted seconds against the sunset on the kindergarten swing.She is my soul outside my body. My dad warned me the first time I brought her home that black cats were mascots and that if he got into trouble because of this cat, he wouldn't let me go.The two children, Momo and I, lived under the low eaves in a depressing and trembling manner.I think this may be the reason why Mo Mo rarely sleeps.

Morning Wood, with her Prince William smile, lives next door and goes to the same high school as me.He likes photography and weapon magazines, likes to wear T-shirts with the brand on the lower left corner, likes the sky, wheat fields and the sea. But then he said he still likes me the most.Chen Mu said, little princess, let us love each other when we were children, and let's walk step by step until we grow old. No one has ever called me a little princess. At home and at school, I am more like a Cinderella who has no capital to develop into a princess.I hugged Momo and asked fearfully, would you love my cat too, would you not yell at me or scold me for loving me forever, would you pull my hair and hit me, would you always make me wear an apron, Stay home, can you give me a warm home and allow me to paint the walls blue?

He said, little princess, I will let you live in a blue palace, wear a spotless long dress, and feed Mo Mo into a pig that can't walk. I wept with joy.I think Chenmu will always wrap me and Momo in happiness, and I can't live so vaguely like my mother who is changing slippers for her man at home. I keep Momo stubbornly, and I love Chenmu stubbornly. One day when my mother was cooking, I leaned against the door and said to my mother, I like morning wood.Mother smiled dully.You have to learn to cook first, she said with a smell of oily smoke: This will be your career. Father suddenly lost his job.Grandmother died of an unknown disease.At her funeral, I shed tears for this old woman who had been a lifelong slave for her husband and son, and I also cried for the fate of me and Momo.My father was like a bomb with a wick that could spell the end of us at any moment.

When Mo Mo reached the estrus period, he slept even less, opened his eyes quietly at night, and screamed until dawn.I often take her out for a walk, thinking in my heart: Mo Mo, find your lover quickly, your cry will detonate my father sooner or later. Finally, in a dead night, the incessant screams cut my skin like a blade.Father suddenly sat up from the bed.He rushed to the living room, and then Mo Mo's cry on the verge of death.I ran over, and my mother's man—that's all I could call this fierce madman in front of me—was opening the door, trying to kick Momo out with his feet.Momo fell by the door, pawed at the door tightly and refused to leave.Her stomach was kicked, her skull was kicked, her back was kicked, her tail was motionless, like a dead rope.She couldn't open her eyes or breathe during the series of kicks and kicks. She insisted on not letting go of her claws and not escaping.All she can do is bleed.Silly Momo, let go of the door and run for your life, this kind of home is not worth your nostalgia.Stubbornness will only get you killed.

Immediately I fell to the ground and hugged the horrible man's foot, which was ravaging the dying cat with alarming frequency.The foot kicked me back, and rained down on me.I hit the corner, my head like a flower blooming in despair.Dear Momo, I may be dying too.It was getting darker and darker before my eyes, and I saw my mother slightly stopping my father, with hesitation and timidity.I called to Chen Mu: Chen Mu, you are a superman, come and save Mo Mo.I fainted in despair.In my dream, Mo Mo, who is so black that there is no boundary with the night, is singing.Chen Mu caressed my face and said, little princess, Mo Mo will not die, please wake up.

Woke up to another bright day.The mother stayed by the bed, her sadness was still very light.I stared at her, afraid to ask that life-and-death question.She said that Mo Mo was not dead, and Chen Mu was looking at her. Momo still didn't sleep.The white towel she was lying on was covered with deep and shallow bloodstains.She huddled her body like a blooming velvet flower.Her mouth could not close, and all four of the long, sharp cat teeth were broken, leaving jagged, bloody stubble.She has been dumb ever since, she can't cry or sing anymore.It was difficult for her to stand, her front leg was broken, and her little paw was shaking violently.She licked my fingers with her bloody tongue, her shaved tail wagging like a flag of surrender.I burst into tears, little Momo, you should have run away, you are still so young, you were hurt like this before you became a mother.

I turned around and threw myself into Chenmu's arms, and said: If you love me, take Momo away. Mo Mo was settled in Chen Mu's house.She recovered enough to walk slowly, bouncing and bouncing.We found her a quiet white tom as a mate.The incomplete Momo soon became pregnant. I couldn't escape this circle of incompetent mothers and brutal fathers.I no longer spoke to my father, and I rarely spoke to my mother.My greatest joy every day is to go to Chenmu's house to see Momo after school. Chen Mu's face was very dark, much like my father.His father was in a car accident and had a broken rib.The first time he came back from the hospital, he said to me with a cold face: The adults are right. Black cats can only bring bad luck and disaster. Your family, my family, and even herself cannot escape.

I said, Chen Mu even you said the same, she is just a simple cat, she has no magic power, she can't even protect herself.You promised me to take good care of her, if you still love me. Winter is here, and Momo's stomach is getting bigger.Chen Mu's father is still not well.Chen Mu started yelling at me, he forgot the oath he had made, and Mo Mo has become his burden.I started to treat Chenmu like my mother treated my father.Help him cook for his father in the hospital, and help him comfort his haggard mother.I let him scold without saying a word, and swept up the shards of glass he threw. On a snowy night, I dreamed of Momo again, and she sang.Mo Mo also said to me, you know, I am very tired and I want to sleep. In the early morning of the second day, the sun was not out, and I was sweeping snow in the yard.Chen Mu walked towards me and told me blankly that he kicked Mo Mo out of the house last night.I stop and stand still.I said, Chen Mu, are you kidding, there was so much snow last night, Momo was pregnant, she has no teeth, she can’t walk steadily, she can’t even cry for help——I know this is not a joke , I cried while talking.I thought about it, and asked hopefully, did she stay at the door all this time, and you carried her into the room again this morning?No, Chen Mu said, I carried her to a bush far away last night, and dropped her from there.My mother said that if she was thrown away, my father's illness would be cured. The same Chenmu, said that he would give me a life like a princess, that he would love me forever, and that he would feed Momo into a pig that couldn't walk.He is the God who saved me, and he also saved my Momo once.At this moment, he has a different expression and a distorted face.I can no longer see my morning wood. I begged Morningwood, who had no love in his chest, to take me to the bush.Otherwise, Momo would freeze to death or starve to death. I have searched far, far, for a long time.Mo Mo melted away like that snow.My prince also took his promise and stayed away from me with the winter.I will always be a lonely Cinderella who cannot transform. In early spring, kindergarten started.A little girl who had seen me and Mo Mo came to me.she cried.She said that there was no one in the kindergarten for a holiday, and after school started, they found a dead cat beside the swing in the backyard.She said it seemed to be Momo. I saw my Momo again.She stretched out on the wet dirt after the snow melted.Surrounded by a string of footprints like small peach blossoms.Her body was narrow and her stomach was deflated—she must have given birth.There are black ants all over her, eating her.Her body has long been hollowed out.Her eyes were empty too, with ants crawling in and out of her eye sockets.When she died, her eyes should still be wide open, in peace. The little girl hid behind me and cried timidly. She asked me, is the little black cat rotting?I knelt down and hugged her like I hugged Momo in the past.I said that decay is not terrible at all, we are alive, and we are also rotting.Human life is actually a rot. Mo Mo did not find the way home, but she found the swing we used to watch the sunset.Good ink. Momo hadn't slept all the time, and was always very tired.Now she is finally asleep.Mo Mo, it must be a good feeling to travel in a dream. I said in my heart that the ants who are not related to Mo Mo are eating Mo Mo, but my favorite Chen Mu is also eating my heart.The boy I love promised to take care of the cat I love, and he took care of her and fell asleep. My cat is not a cat with nine lives, she only has one life, and she dies. My father soon had a new job and a lot of money.He triumphantly said that it was because Mo Mo died. I still used his money and went to a boarding school in a distant city.That city never snows that makes me sad. The father also moved to the beautiful seaside with his docile wife. Before leaving, I painted the room sky blue.In my whole life, it is impossible for Chenmu to give me such a blue home. I didn't say goodbye to him, because it didn't matter to meet again. Today I came back here again by a strange coincidence.Morningwood has moved away long ago, and it looks like a ruin here, and I can even believe that there are graves hidden in the tall green grass.I shut myself in the house, missing Momo and Chenmu. It rained for three days.I can't forget that announcement-the prince didn't forget his Cinderella, he used a photo instead of a glass slipper to find her.I couldn't help but look at that lovely photo and the few words left by Chen Mu again.The rain washed out the photos, and half of the entire advertisement was missing.But I still saw a crucial line: little princess, I found Momo's children, and I have been raising them. At that moment, I thought maybe the rain stopped and a rainbow appeared.Yes, Chen Mu still has love, love me, love Mo Mo.Maybe I'll never forgive him, but right now I want to see him and Momo's child.I searched for Chenmu's address on the notice, and there was only the impressive address, and the rest of the content was knocked down by the rain, and I don't know where it went. God's will tricks people. I stood in the middle of the overgrown weeds, and the hallucinating cat began its immortal sleep song again.Chenmu, will we meet again?