I met her online.How did it start?I can't remember clearly, it seems to be because of my plan!The plan reads like this: "If I have ten million, I can buy a house. Do I have ten million?No. So I still don't have a house. If I have wings, I can fly. Do I have wings?No. So I can't fly either. Even pouring out all the water in the Pacific Ocean will not extinguish the fire of my love for you. Can all the water in the entire Pacific Ocean be poured out?no. So I don't love you. " In fact, this is just my occupational disease.I am a graduate student. In order to write numerical programs, my mind is always full of various logics.When the assumptions are not true, the conclusions drawn are bullshit.It's just like discussing the issue that eunuchs are more likely to have boys or girls, it is meaningless.Writing these far-fetched things in the plan proves that I am an extremely boring person, and in fact I am.So it's reasonable that he didn't catch any beauties, so that the pillow is still empty.

And she is an exception.She actually emailed me and told me that I am a very interesting person.interesting? How could such an adjective be applied to me?Just like describing Lee Teng-hui with honesty, it will make people laugh out loud.I think if she has a low IQ, she has a mental problem. Looking at her address, it doesn't look like her, her name is "Qing Wu Fei Yang", which is quite a poetic name. However, the titles on the Internet are always false and true, the false is true, and the real is false, so it is not accurate.In other words, the dinosaur will never say that she is a dinosaur, let alone that she lives in Jurassic Park, she will always try her best to lure you and mislead you.And a beautiful nickname is the best weapon for dinosaurs to hunt innocent boys like me.

Speaking of dinosaurs, it brings back my painful memories.I have seen a few netizens, and the result is that one is more vicious than the other, and they run away every time. I think I can join Steven Spielberg's production team and help him do special effects for movies.Roommate Artest’s experience is the same as mine. If we take the dinosaurs he and I saw as the X-axis and the degree of fright as the Y-axis, a linear equation can be obtained through regression analysis, and then the Taking the partial differential of X and taking the indefinite integral of Y, we can get the law of "there are no beautiful women on the Internet".So in theory, the internet is full of dinosaurs, the only difference being whether she was carnivorous or herbivorous.

Before introducing "Qing Wu Fei Yang", Artest must be mentioned first.Artest has been my buddy since college, but our personalities are very different.He was tall and handsome, and most of all, he had a mouth so sweet and oily that I doubt any female animal could not drown in his spout.I like to call him "Lady Killer" and he's a professional.There are countless girls who died tragically under his hands, and the victims are all over the island of Taiwan.He has won countless battles in the field of love, but he will never take prisoners of war. He said that he has reached the highest state in the field of love, that is, "passing through thousands of flowers without touching one's body."It is said that this is even higher than Xu Zhimo's "Wave a sleeve, don't take a cloud away".Xu Zhimo had to wave his sleeves to get rid of the girl who stuck to his hands, while Artest didn't even have his sleeves.

Artest always said that I was too honest, that I was cannon fodder in love.It's no wonder that I am neither tall nor handsome, and I wear a pair of highly myopic glasses on my nose, which makes my eyes look like a narrow line.I remember one time when I was in a fluency class, the teacher suddenly woke me up because he suspected that I was sleeping, and I was paying attention to the lecture at that time.Maybe the horoscope has something to do with it!Since I was a child, I have been surrounded by men who look like women, or women who look like men.Artest often said that there are four types of men: the first type is called "get something for nothing", that is, you don't have to chase girls, and you will naturally be paid back; It is easy to win the heart; the third type is called "hard work and hard work" type, you must rack your brains and exhaust 36 tricks before you will have spoils of war; and I belong to the fourth type called "self-seeking" type, you can only expect to meet To the girl whose eye was hooked by cow dung.

Artest is actually very good friends, he would often transfer some girls to me, but unfortunately I was too disappointing, always close to "sweet" and timid.But it can't be my fault, it's just because I have read a few more sage books, and I understand etiquette, righteousness, honesty and shame, and paying attention to etiquette, righteousness, honesty and shame is usually a taboo in military strategists when pursuing girls.For example, if I go to drink coffee with a girl who is not too thin, and I kindly ask her to order some more snacks, but she says she is afraid that she will get fat, then I will say that you are too late.

Last year, I went out to dinner with a girl. She boasted that her friends said she had an "angel-like face and a devil-like figure", but I told her seriously, "Your friend said the opposite". Fortunately, we were having a simple meal at that time, and I was just hit on the Tanzhong acupoint on my chest by the flying chopsticks.If it is a row meal, I think it will probably kill someone. After the experience of escaping from the dead, I began to experience the ferocity of dinosaurs.Later, Artest came up with an escape rule, that is, when meeting alone with any female netizens in the future, he must bring a calling machine.We will support each other and let the caller ring at the right time. If we encounter a carnivorous dinosaur, we will say "the dormitory is on fire";As a result, there were four fire alarms in Artest's room and six burglaries.I was lucky and only got stolen five times.

So before seeing "Qing Wu Fei Yang", my heart has actually been strengthened. Even if I encounter dinosaurs again, my heart rate can still maintain 72 beats per minute.Artest once reminded me that if she didn't have long hair, she would be a nympho, because there are only two places where girls fly when they dance: hair and skirts.Flying hair is of course beautiful; but if the skirt is flying, it means that she has a certain degree of sexual suggestion.But I've always thought she was different, and I don't mean particularly big of course.The book says that Scorpio people will have a very keen intuition, so I really believe in my sixth sense.As for Artest, although he can see a girl's bust at a glance, and determine whether it is an A cup or a B cup; or make a girl lie flat on the bed within a few days, he may not be able to really understand a girl.

Artest often quotes Shakespeare's famous saying: "Women are loved, not understood", to prove that understanding women is not a condition for being proud of love.In fact, this sentence really makes sense.I remember that I used to live with one man and four women, it was really miserable.All the details of life have to be taken care of for them, because girls only know about romantic affairs, not necessarily daily necessities.In order to protect their chastity, I have to take the roll call late every day. If I behave inappropriately, others will laugh at me as a self-confident thief; .After they take a bath in the summer night, I have to fight with heaven and man, which can be said to be seen but not eaten.After living with them for two years, I only realized one truth, that is, no matter how pure, lovely, gentle, innocent, dignified and small birds are, they roll up their trousers and count the hair on their legs in the same posture.And they all told me to stuff toilet paper under the toilet door.