Chapter 13 Thirteen, December, leave

I saw his shining eyes, I saw his wings, Seeing that old car belching flames, Burning on the road, it passed through the fields, across the city, Destroy bridges, burn dry rivers, and race westward like crazy. — Jack Kerouac December, the cruel season, no lilac blooming in the century-old courtyard, no beauties dancing naked across the stone steps and painted corridors of Takashi’s "Le garconchimis" garden on Hengshan Road, no pigeons, no ecstasy, no jazz music shades of blue. The winter rain is gloomy, and there is a slightly bitter taste on the tip of the tongue. The humidity in the air will make people rotten, rotten to the heart. Winter in Shanghai is like a woman's period holiday, which is wet and disgusting.

Tiantian decides to go on a trip. He always leaves Shanghai for a period of time at this time of year. He can't stand the cold and wet weather. Even the occasional sunlight is gray and hairy when it shines on him. "I want to escape for a while. ,” he said, “where are you going?” South, where the sun is stronger and the sky is bluer.For example, Haikou. "Want to go alone?" He nodded. "Well, take care of yourself, you have an IC card, you can call back anytime. I will stay in the house and continue writing novels." The thought of never being able to finish the novel terrifies me, and I can enjoy a more intimate space, a physical sense of space, after every day is gone.I don't know if Tiantian is also aware of this, whether he chooses to travel because he also wants to temporarily avoid some kind of danger brought about by our daily relationship, he is a hundred times more sensitive than ordinary people, and sometimes, that kind of unexplainable emotion The time when you get two people so entangled that you can't breathe freely and lose your creativity may also be the time to go on a trip.

What's more, Mark grows from the weakest link of our emotional life like a growth, and it cannot be easily removed. The reason for its existence is that a virus broke out somewhere in my body. This virus is called "passion". In the eyes of many people, lust and love cannot be confused. In the eyes of many emancipated women, finding a person who loves each other and a man who can give her orgasm is the most perfect pattern of private life.They will say: the separation of love and lust does not conflict with the attitude of pursuing a pure life. The daily life that consumes your life day by day guides women's intuition and will, and they look for any way of life that makes them feel safe.They put the keys to the secrets of life under their pillows. They are more free than women 50 years ago, more beautiful than women 30 years ago, and have more orgasms of different types than women 10 years ago.

The Volkswagen taxi I booked on the phone stopped downstairs. I checked Tiantian’s suitcase for the last time, a pair of Tedlapidus cigarettes (it seems that only certain counters in Shanghai can buy them), Gillette razors, mouthwash, seven packs White underwear, seven pairs of black socks, a Discman, an anthology of poems by Dylan Thomas, Dali’s Diaries, “Hitchcock’s Stories”, a framed photo of us together, and the other bag that he insisted on bringing Then we got into the car together with an umbrella, because he gave up taking the plane with the cat and was about to fall asleep on the sleeper train to Haikou.

The rain hit the windshield of the taxi, the streets were gray, and the shops and pedestrians looked like piles of dried paint in the rain, with distorted lines.Tiantian has been drawing the water vapor on the window glass with his fingers, drawing strange symbols.The radio in the taxi was playing sweet and greasy pop songs, and Ren Xianqi, who was in his late thirties, was still playing naughty and singing "Look at the girl on the opposite side". Uneasy, holding my hand on his knee every day, we will be separated for nearly two months, we will suddenly find that the other is not next to the pillow, and there will be no one knocking on the bathroom door, clamoring to take a shower together , there is no need to prepare two servings of food, wash two people's clothes, and there is no need to worry about jealousy, tears at any time, and no need to hear each other's dreams.

There are still many migrant workers wandering in the rain on the square of the train station. I remind Tiantian to put away their ID cards, peony cards, IC cards, and train tickets.Taking the elevator up to the waiting hall on the second floor, the ticket check has already begun. Tiantian waved at me, with a bag containing thread balls on his right shoulder, and a suitcase on his left shoulder, rushing to a door with the flow of people. The rain outside had stopped, and when I took the bus to Maison Department Store, I jumped off.This section of Huaihai Road has a civilian atmosphere, and you can see groups of fashionable children.Huating Road has always been a street for young children to grasp the trend of fashion and receive the most cutting-edge fashion information. This street is so small, but the nature of Shanghai people who are good at making use of every inch of space is reflected. They are full of charming and cheap clothes. There are leather bags, shoes and hats, handicrafts, and toys. This street, which is written in the guidebook for overseas tourists to travel in Shanghai, closely follows foreign fashion, and the prices are much cheaper.Once I saw a beaded silk handbag with a price tag of 250 yuan at the "Hong Kong Expo" in the Shanghai Exhibition Center. I saw the same handbag on Huating Road in the afternoon and bargained for 150 yuan.Whenever I’m in a bad mood, like other girls, I come to this street to shop around and buy a lot of beautiful and light things to go back. Most of the clothes are only worn once or twice, because these They were all bought in a frenzied mood, and the styles were all exaggerated and pornographic. They were only suitable for being alone in the room and looking at the mirror as Marilyn Monroe for yourself, and entertaining yourself.

On Huating Road, there were many Chinese and foreign teenagers dressed up as flying girls. A group of Japanese boys wore roller skates, showing off their skating skills and hair dyed like feather dusters like stuffed butterflies.A Shanghai girl with dark lips walks beside her companions with silver gray lips, they are eating "Zhenbaoguo" brand lollipops (children, big and small, each hold a lollipop, which was once part of Shanghai's fashionable image), always worried They will die of poisoning from eating too much cheap fluorescent lipstick. Of course, there is no official report that a little girl in this city ate herself to death because of lipstick.

A group of well-dressed office men came from the crowd, and one of them waved to me enthusiastically. I think he must be waving to the people behind me, so he continued to ignore me.He was still waving and calling my name, and I stared at him in surprise. "I'm a spider." I wonder if today is April Fool's Day. In my impression, this spider is a social youth with a criminal impulse and a terribly high IQ. I don't see him these days. I do small jobs all the time, and at night, I watch the computer and become obsessed with the Internet. But the young man in front of him is wearing a pair of rimless glasses that white-collar men like, his teeth are very white, and he has a healthy smile. "I'm going to die, you can't recognize me."

So I laughed, "You look pretty," I said. "You're pretty too." He said, without a trace of joking expression on his face, and his every move was measured. Manabe coffee shop on the side of the road.We sit opposite each other, and the aroma of coffee can make people poisoned slowly.So many people are addicted to sitting in coffee shops for an afternoon, even if they spend one-fifth of their lives in coffee shops, as long as they have the illusion of being free from the burden of work.There's quiet music, waiters with gigolo faces, and we talk about Lotte's Café. "It's really a nice place," Spider said, "It's a pity that I didn't enjoy being there at the time, and I only thought about working to make money."

"And how to crack the safe." I teased him. "I'm going to die. I can't talk about this again. I'm a good man now." He laughed, and the business card he handed me said Golden Apple Computer Company, which was founded by him and a few college classmates. A small company, specializing in software development, network installation and sales of computers, has just started to pick up. "It is estimated that there will be considerable profits by the end of the year." His desire to make money is still expanding, but he is more calm. "By the way, how is that Meier? Is there still contact?" I thought of his former online girlfriend.

"We often drink coffee, watch movies and play tennis together." "Thank God, my premonition was wrong. This Meier seems to be quite compatible with you. Will you marry her?" "Oh no, Meier is a girl online, but she is a man in real life." He quickly corrected me.With a surprised expression on my face, I said, "Of course we are just friends, nothing else!" He laughed, whether I believe it or not. "He pretends to be a girl online to attract boys, so he must be mentally eccentric." "Yes, he has always wanted to have sex reassignment surgery. Of course, I just feel that he is kind and enthusiastic when I date him. He has ideas. He knows that I am not gay, but he can still be friends, right?" "I really want to meet this Meier, it sounds unusual."