Chapter 6 Chapter 6 is still missing

After going back that night, Bieqiong had a high fever in the middle of the night. She was shivering and wrapped in a quilt, grabbed a few pills from the drawer and threw them down her throat, drank a stomach full of boiled water and lay down on the bed, drowsy and sweating profusely.It didn't take long for him to be hot and cold again, top-heavy, like being in a snowy and desolate winter field, being hooked by someone with an iron hook, roasting on the fire, turning up and down, left and right, every inch of the pain.My whole body was weak and hurt everywhere, my waist, stomach, and legs were cramped, my throat was burning, and I couldn't speak.After finally staying up until dawn, I vaguely heard the key turning outside the living room. Guessing it was Shao Xiaowei who came back, he managed to lift his spirits and yelled twice.When Shao Xiaowei opened the door and saw her, he was so angry that he was almost unconscious.

It was her first time in an ambulance, and she heard Shao Xiaowei crying beside her, saying "Don't you will be fine, hold on, it's fine..." and other words, she remembered going down the stairs to pick up erasers when she was a child Duck, leaning forward uncontrollably, sliding down the steps, the mother who locked the door behind her screamed in fright and ran down and grabbed her leg, comforting her, baby, don't be afraid, mother is here, it's okay. In the middle of the night she fell off the bed, there was a loud noise in the dark night, she called her mother for help, her mother quickly got up and grabbed her, baby, don't be afraid, mother is here.

The floor just finished mopping was very slippery. She toddled and slipped off the sofa without anyone noticing. She staggered back and hit her head on the floor. She heard the sound of her mother saying, don’t be afraid of the baby, mother here I am. Riding a small tricycle to the park, I don’t know which shepherd dog is not on a leash, barking and pounced up, my mother quickly picked her up and turned around, the baby is scared, mother is here. ... So much so that she opened her mouth to speak, and when she heard her mother accidentally cutting vegetables in the kitchen and making a "ah" sound, the little people would run over and hug her tightly, and said as if they were serious: "Mom, don't be afraid, the baby is here!" Woolen cloth.

But she grew up slowly, and she no longer yelled like she did when she was a child when encountering anything. Like everyone else, she learned to be calm, no matter how big things were, she knew how to remain calm, and her expression was restrained; no matter how frightened or unhappy she was, she never showed it on her face.And mom won't say anything, baby, don't be afraid, mom is here. She had a long, long dream. In the dream, she stood at a certain point and ran non-stop. She heard a warm and sharp voice saying come to me. Looking around through the thick fog, she only saw him He was standing in the center of the circle and wanted to run towards him, but the wind was blowing under his feet, after all, he just kept drawing circles without getting close at all.Until Qiao Lei suddenly appeared, took her hand and said, let me run with you.He dragged her forward with exhausted strength, ignoring her muttering "I can't run, I can't run, I won't run, I won't run anymore", he pulled out a whip from behind, and he said, if you don't run, I will pumped you.

In this way, you will be refreshed and have the strength to run. I have other ways, as he said, he took out bees, scorpions, rattlesnakes, and awls one after another. Then, he brushed his fingers past his ears and tore off a piece of skin, revealing a skull, and pressed her passionately against her, scaring her so much that she turned her head and ran away... Waking up is a week later. When I opened my eyes, I saw that I was in a clean and white ward, with a drip hanging on my arm, and the transparent liquid was dripping into the blood through the long and thin tube.Xiaowei Shao in a white dress was talking and joking with a "white shirt" who was a full head taller than her, and they looked like a couple.The voice was so familiar until he came over and saw her wide eyes—

"Bie Qiong, are you finally awake?" Jiang Xiaoguang's voice was full of surprise, and he said to Shao Xiaowei, "Look, look, she's awake." ——When did the two of them become so familiar? "Bie Qiong, you scared me to death." Shao Xiaowei cried and laughed and rushed to the bedside, "Do you know that I saved your life? Bacterial infection caused by virus, high fever for a week, and you eat it yourself Wrong medicine, severe liver damage, blood test values ​​are all super high." She didn't know what to say. It turned out that after sleeping for seven days, she always felt that it was exaggerated when she saw such a performance in TV dramas.

Jiang Xiaoguang said: "Yeah, I scared everyone. Fortunately, the doctor said, you are just too tired. But it's hard work, Lieutenant. In the past few days, she has been with the bed and almost never leaves." Although it was a bit strange, she didn't care about other questions, and said awkwardly: "Little Captain, thank you." Shao Xiaowei's eyes were red, "Get out, did I ask you to say thank you?" "I ordered some hot porridge, and it will be delivered in 10 minutes. You two have a good chat. If there is nothing else, I will go back to the park first." Jiang Xiaoguang picked up the coat on the chair and walked out the door.

Bie Qiong remembered what Qiao Lei said that day, she stopped him, "Director Jiang, about Yasheng, I...I want to explain." "Yasheng?" He stepped back, "I forgot to tell you Bie Qiong, we have signed the venture capital agreement, and the related work is proceeding in an orderly manner these days." "Already... already signed?" She was so startled that she wanted to sit up, she hadn't eaten for a few days, and was supported by drips of nutrient solution, halfway up she was held down by Shao Xiaowei. "Lie down and talk if you have something to say, what's the rush?"

"But……" Jiang Xiaoguang's cell phone rang incessantly, and he didn't have time to say anything. He looked at the caller ID, "Bie Qiong, you deserve a lot of credit! I'll let you take a month off and rest well. When you come back, we'll fight side by side again." He hurried out. Xiaowei Shao sent him to the door, Jiang Xiaoguang finished answering the phone, the two talked for a while in a low voice, she became more and more confused lying on the bed. The takeaway brother brought nutritious porridge, Shao Xiaowei sat on the bedside and fed her with a light yellow disposable spoon.

She wanted to decline, but she didn't have any strength in her body, so she didn't bother to be polite. "Girl, are you stupid? Yasheng invested 40 million U.S. dollars to obtain 45% of the equity this time. The first batch of funds has been injected. Including the two directors appointed by Yasheng, there are five board members in total. The Jiang you often call The director of the garden is now the general manager Jiang. As for Zhang Dong, he is now the executive president." She has always been sloppy about these things, so she asked casually, "So what?" "You still don't understand?" Shao Xiaowei was very surprised.

"Understand what?" "Qiao Lei is the chairman of the company." What? The hot porridge choked into the trachea, coughing non-stop. "I thought you knew that this week, he came to see you every day. He didn't say anything, just moved a chair and sat by the bed, just looked at you silently." Shao Xiaowei looked suspicious, "He seems to have changed. " We often hate others saying that we have changed. How many people think they know how much they know about my appearance and my heart?My temperament, my thoughts, my clothes, my preferences?Or my attitude towards you towards others?Or, is it the life I once had or should have had in the future? On the one hand, we hate those who say this about us, but at the same time, on the other hand, we easily draw the same conclusion on others—— you've changed. If people often say this to us, what is the best reply? It's a pity that I couldn't give a witty and amazing answer. Maybe for someone like Bie Qiong, just one sentence-"Fuck your shit" is enough. Shao Xiaowei said, "Jiang Xiaoguang has made great contributions. A few days ago, Yasheng sent a core team to your park for the last on-site inspection. After the inspection, he gave a wonderful speech." "Really?" Bie Qiong's tone was not without regret, "It's a pity I wasn't there, I really want to know what he said." Shao Xiaowei took out his mobile phone, adjusted the content of the video, and his expression was rather smug, "I knew you would think so. Now, here you are!" She put the mobile phone in the center of the small dining table on Bieqiong's hospital bed, and pressed the play button , sat down next to Bieqiong's pillow, and leaned his head over, "Your colleague Guan Jiajia copied it to me when he saw you yesterday. He said you must be interested." On the mobile phone, Jiang Xiaoguang was standing in the largest conference room of "Sunflower". He was wearing a suit and leather tie, and he was wearing a white star-dot tie. Filled with confidence. With a light touch, a clear picture appeared on the huge projector behind him, and the slight sound of the machine running was faintly heard. "Everyone, before I start my speech, I would like to ask everyone to look at the following set of data——" He turned around and pointed at the projector behind him, the thick mid-range sound filled the entire conference room—— In October 2009, Sun Qiqi, a teacher at Xihu Kindergarten in Jianshui County, Yunnan Province, stabbed more than 20 disobedient 4-year-old children with syringe needles. In December 2009, at the Nanqu Road Kindergarten in Yuzhong District, Chongqing, an intern teacher forced a 5-year-old girl to lick and eat phlegm. On May 12, 2010, a vicious incident of children being hacked to death occurred in a private kindergarten in Nanzheng County, Shaanxi Province. Seven children were killed and 13 children were injured. In September 2010, Chen, a teacher at Tianma Children's Art School in Xuzhou, Jiangsu Province, beat a girl for more than ten minutes because of a dispute with her own daughter. In September 2010, he fell into a coma on the second day of kindergarten, and Xiaoxuan, a 22-month-old boy, died strangely. His father and doctors found multiple bruises, a fractured left collarbone, and a 3 cm long scratch on his head... In June 2011, at Tongxin Beijia Kindergarten in Chaoyang District, Beijing, a 6-year-old girl was stabbed in the leg by a female intern teacher with a sewing needle. In June 2011, 15 children from Jinan Century Jiayuan Dafengche Kindergarten were forced to squat in the toilet, locked in a small dark room, spanked, and watched horror movies. In August 2011, in the Nanguo Garden of Changsha Golden Sun Kindergarten, a two-year-old and seven-month-old girl ran around during her lunch break. She was slapped in the face by her homeroom teacher and picked up in the air. In October 2011, at Suwang Zaohui Kindergarten in Xi’an, a 4-year-old boy was cut off his wrist with a saw blade by the kindergarten teacher because he didn’t do exercises well. In December 2011, Xue Tongxia, the principal of Mogou Kindergarten in Xunyang County, Shaanxi Province, burned the hands of 10 children with tongs because the children could not recite the text. In February 2012, at Shangdi Love Kindergarten in Haidian District, Beijing, a 3-year-old boy accused the teacher of pricking a penis with a needle. In May 2012, at the privately-run Green Shuangyang Kindergarten in Yangpu District, Shanghai, a girl’s lower body was put into a kidney bean by a female preschool teacher named Lin. In October 2012, at Lantian Montessori Kindergarten in Taiyuan, Shanxi Province, a 5-year-old girl was slapped 70 times by a female teacher because she could not count 10+1. In October 2012, a female teacher at Blue Peacock Kindergarten in Chengxi Street, Wenling, Zhejiang, forcibly grabbed a child by his ears and lifted them up. The child’s feet were nearly 20 centimeters off the ground, with a painful expression and howling.After searching by netizen "Human Flesh", more photos of child abuse have been exposed: sticking tape on the child's mouth, putting buckets and garbage buckets on the child's head, what's more, throwing the child directly in the trash can middle… ... The people sitting in the conference room began to whisper to each other and there was quite a commotion. When the discussion gradually quieted down, Jiang Xiaoguang said seriously: "In recent years, kindergarten teachers have frequently extended their hands to young children, and incidents of child abuse in kindergartens have occurred frequently, which has led to a series of problems in kindergartens that are not qualified to run schools all over the country due to disorderly management. The reasons, I think, are mainly as follows. First, the qualification threshold for running a kindergarten is relatively low, especially when public kindergartens are difficult to enter, and private kindergartens are blooming everywhere, which directly leads to the uneven quality of early childhood education institutions. As we all know, To participate in the teacher qualification review, you must pass the study of pedagogy and educational psychology and pass the assessment, as well as pass the Putonghua test and obtain a second-level and second-class certificate before you can apply for the examination. Those who have completed these subjects must bring the above-mentioned subjects. The relevant certificates can only be approved by applying to the local education bureau.” "Should it be so strict? Have you passed the exam?" Shao Xiaowei interrupted. "Yes, yes, you don't know how difficult the exam is. You only passed the exam after two exams." Bie Qiong continued to read while answering her. "In many places in China, people don't realize the importance of early childhood education. They think that it's enough not to cry, make noise or starve, and raise their children in the way of raising pigs. The kindergarten teachers invited, let alone the kindergarten teacher qualification certificate, they I haven’t even participated in systematic education and training, and I don’t even know what a teacher’s morality and style are, let alone a sense of responsibility.” Shao Xiaowei interrupted again, "The day after you had a fever, a well-known event happened in Maicheng." "What's up?" "You know Little Sun Kindergarten, right?" Bie Qiong frowned and thought for a while, "The one on the first street? The one that claims to have the best food?" "That's right. When his kindergarten teacher and the school bus driver took the students to the kindergarten, they forgot a little boy over 3 years old on the school bus. When they sent the students home in the afternoon, they found that they had been smothered to death in the school bus." My God, Bie Qiong's scalp exploded, "Really?" "The kindergarten relied on its own knowledge of the leadership of the Education Bureau, and wanted to give some money privately. As a result, the parents posted on Weibo, and several big V reposted it. The mainstream media in various provinces followed up. In the past few days, the entrance of the kindergarten has been surrounded by people all over the country. The reporters who rushed over were all reported by China Central Television.” Because she likes children, Bie Qiong would go to the teaching area every day at work, looking at the lively children, their smiles can cleanse the soul, and I don't know how many of her inexplicable troubles have been swept away. As long as you have a little sense of responsibility, Bie Qiong thought, count the total number of people when you get on the bus, count the number when you get off, and finally look at it from beginning to end before getting off.Or the head teacher finds out that the person is not there, and calls the parents to inform the parents, which can be completely avoided. It's too late to say anything now. A fresh life has passed away, and at the same time, there is also the once happy family. Jiang Xiaoguang on the phone is still talking—— "Second, the relevant departments lack supervision and management of early childhood education. Everyone can understand from the reports of TV, newspapers and other media. Every time something happens, when the reporter interviews the relevant leaders, the speeches are the same. This kindergarten has no qualifications to run a school. , it is illegal to run a school without permission, it must be strictly investigated, and the relevant teachers must be expelled-I say something harsh, why did you go there so early? Then again, a good early childhood education institution cannot rely on supervision, the most important thing is self-improvement and strengthen management." Well said, Bie Qiong silently praised in her heart. "Third, why are there frequent child abuse incidents? Children smothered to death in school buses can be avoided with a little sense of responsibility. The most direct reason is that the number of kindergartens in various places has soared, and everyone has invested more in the construction of kindergarten buildings, ignoring the quality of teachers. And the salary of kindergarten teachers, which ranks the bottom three in all industries, has also caused some immature kindergarten teachers to have extremely negative emotions... This is especially serious in second- and third-tier cities, and over time, it will be vented on students..." "When I was young, I didn't eat well, and my teacher tied me to the railing with a rope, until my mother came to find me after school..." Shao Xiaowei gritted his teeth with hatred when he mentioned the incident. At that time, parents didn't pay much attention to these things, and it was OK if they didn't lack arms or legs. Everyone grows up silently with a stomach full of dark stories.It got even worse when I was in primary school—— "Hit when you should, and scold when you swear, don't be soft." Almost all parents have said this sentence, right? The slogan that students should not be punished corporal punishment has been chanted for so many years. Who dares to say no to corporal punishment?Unless you have the guts, think about where to transfer. Jiang Xiaoguang's speech has come to an end, "Early childhood education is very important to the growth of children. 'Sunflower' strictly abides by the approval conditions of private kindergartens in my country. In addition to good school building construction, we pay special attention to the quality of teachers. All the main class teachers, classroom teachers , and even parenting teachers, interviews are conducted three to five times, and even home visits are conducted to fully understand the person's personality, psychological quality, emotional control level, etc. from all aspects and details before being formally hired. , to go overseas for training for one month, and then join the job after a one-month trial. We will also organize kindergarten teachers to visit excellent kindergartens at home and abroad to learn and exchange from time to time. At the same time, a good salary and vacation system fully guarantees and stabilizes the quality of life of kindergarten teachers... " ... Shao Xiaowei said, "Hey, I haven't seen it here. I missed it when I went out to answer the phone. I didn't expect your kindergarten recruitment to be so strict." The mobile phone pops up a reminder: the battery is running low, please recharge in time, and the video is paused. Bijeong pressed the play button again. "As we all know, Montessori, who is known internationally as 'a truly outstanding teacher and a world-renowned early childhood educator', believes that the essence and significance of early childhood education is to help children grow up perfectly in their lives. She advocates that the purpose of early childhood education is not for To prepare for primary school, but to lay the foundation of wisdom and morality for their whole life, to cultivate good habits of lifelong learning, and to shape a perfect personality. Before the age of six, children develop good social behavior and personality quality, after the age of six, it is just Compulsive repetition. "Sunflower" is based on the Montessori concept, combined with the actual situation in China, to create a unique educational concept that is truly suitable for Chinese babies, helping babies actively adapt to the environment before the age of six, and develop good independence ability and learning ability.” Jiang Xiaoguang made an impassioned speech, "What is worth mentioning is that we have opened a remote monitoring platform for kindergarten video live broadcast in all the 'Xiangyanghua' branch gardens. It can basically meet the needs of parents. No matter where the parents are, they only need to log in to this platform with the password , you can see your baby at any time. In addition to the toilet, talk about class, eating, sports, entertainment... It is fully transparent and publicly displayed, clearly displayed on the computer or mobile phone." His tone sank, "Of course, for the vast majority of parents, the main purpose of using video is to ensure that their children have not been abused. We have hesitated to add this platform. To gain the trust of parents in this way, maybe It is not desirable. But I also think that maybe it is because of the lack of trust between preschool teachers and parents that this platform came into being. I believe that as the majority of parents have fully understood us, I have a good understanding of our "Sunflower" The teachers are full of confidence. Its main function will be to enable parents and our preschool teachers to witness the growth of the baby. After all, everyone has only one childhood, and they spend nearly 9 hours in the kindergarten during the day. Parents should not Don’t miss these beautiful and precious moments.” ... After the one-hour-long speech, the core members of Yasheng, consisting of lawyers, accountants, and investment consultants, asked free questions to the management team of "Sunflower", which lasted for more than two hours. Bie Qiong wasn't interested in listening, and of course, Guan Jiajia wasn't interested in recording either. She asked, "So Ascend signed the contract the next day?" "That's right," Shao Xiaowei said perfunctorily while holding the phone. Don Qiong thought, Qiao Lei is really crazy, didn't he say he wanted to cancel? Her train of thought was completely disconnected, and she was just recovering from a serious illness. She finally thought of the key point, "Aren't you going to work? Dai Chuan called me and said you got a boyfriend. When did it happen?" "Talk to the leader and ask for a week's leave. Anyway, I can work in the hospital. There is broadband, so he agreed." She had no choice but to repeat the topic again, "Boyfriend still wants to hide it from me?" "Nothing, it's good friends meeting and eating. Don't listen to his nonsense." Shao Xiaowei said so, but didn't dare to look at her, turned his face to the other side, pretending to look for something. Bie Qiong just wanted to be ashamed to waste her time, and insisted on pushing her away. Seeing that she was in good spirits, she gave a few words of advice, took out her charged mobile phone from the drawer and stuffed it to her, and left with half a push . There were several spam text messages on the phone, and Guan Jiajia asked her why she didn't go to work for a few days.There was also a text message from a stranger, asking her how she was doing, and without a signature, just ignore it. At two o'clock in the afternoon, the nurse added another bag of intravenous drip, which was infused until almost five o'clock, and told her to draw blood the next day, and if there was no major problem, she could be discharged from the hospital. As expected, his spirit was much better. After taking out the infusion needle, he simply got out of bed and went for a walk. Although he still felt very weak, the green grass outside the window was really fascinating, and the outdoor air was really fresh. She leaned back on the bench for the sick to rest on the edge of the grass and closed her eyes. A month off?Doesn't seem to be needed. Qiao Lei became the chairman?She couldn't control his attitude towards her, and hesitated whether to resign, but she loved this kindergarten, and there was only more. Suddenly there were hurried footsteps along the long aisle, and someone called her name. "Little goodbye, little goodbye." She closed her eyes and didn't move. The voice of the person who came was panicked, she was lifted up, her shoulders were pinched painfully, "You are all right, don't scare me." Before she opened her eyes, she had already shouted, "Doctor, doctor!" She had no choice but to open her mouth, "Okay, stop shouting, I'm not dead yet." Her eyes were still closed. The other party let out a long sigh of relief and asked, "What's wrong with your eyes?" "Too lazy to open." "Puchi!" Finally he laughed out loud, "You, ghost spirit, scared me to death." "There is another reason why I don't want to open it. It's because I'm afraid that after I open it," she said slowly, "Qiao Lei, I'm afraid of you...Suddenly, I changed into another one." Vice face." After a short silence, Qiao Lei said: "Bie Qiong, I just want to be angry with you, and you don't think about me, is it easy? I have been angry with you so much for so many years, and finally came back to meet you. I also want to try to be angry. The taste of people." "Does this taste good?" "No," he said, "it's worse than you being angry with me." Scratching his head embarrassingly, "I won't play like this in the future." ...Don't play like this anymore?Thanks to him being able to speak. "So, between us, reconciliation?" "Of course," he said, "after you left that day, I regretted not catching up with you. I think so did he. The two of us stood there for more than half an hour without saying a word, and each drove to our own car. The funeral committee meets." "But I didn't expect you to be so stupid. After such a long journey, you actually walked back alone. Does your foot hurt? I heard from Shao Xiaowei that your feet are full of blood blisters, and she dare not look directly at them." It's not stupid, she said in her heart, she just wanted to take a walk to see if she could continue walking on this road alone without hesitation. "I still want to know the answer to that question." "Which one?" "He... about dropping out of school." "Oh, to be honest, I really don't know. I only heard the exact news from my friend. He was indeed persuaded to leave. I think his good college entrance examination results must have happened to something that absolutely violated the school rules. Give this decision." "Big thing?" she asked back, "Are you alluding to what he did, fighting? Fighting? Whoring? Or stealing?" "Only he knows this. I heard that the school handles it very delicately and keeps it absolutely secret." "But..." Halfway through the words, she closed her mouth in embarrassment. He said it for her, "Do you want to ask, no matter how disgraceful the reason for being expelled, no one will know anyway, can he still continue to associate with you?" She didn't speak, which was her default. "Bie, boys and you girls have different thinking angles. After you girls fall in love, you can fill your mind with love 100%, every second. But for us, love occupies up to 30% of our lives. So you think I thought, when a noble boy like him was admitted to an ideal school and was persuaded to leave, he used all his connections and spent an unknown amount of money in his family to secure his admission to a university in Nanjing. All his future and ideals were far away from him. Gradually drifting away, there is a girlfriend who you suddenly broke promise with him and reported to A University, do you think, how much love is left in his head?" It turned out to be like this. "So, still can't forget him?" "Forget, maybe you can't forget, but you can always let it go completely. Qiao Lei, you don't know, it's not that no one pursued them during this period. A trace of luck is like a person who is accidentally pushed down a cliff longing for a tree to stick out and hang himself. Love me. But after we separated that day, I walked back from No. 13 Middle School by myself. I just wanted to try whether this road was the one I wanted to take. If so, I could still How long will I hold on. Can I really abandon everything, completely resolutely and desperately once?" He couldn't bear to listen any more, "Bie, let me take you back to the ward, what do you want to eat tonight?" "Listen to what I have to say. If you want to say it, say it thoroughly, and I will never say another word after that." She continued: "That road is so long and dark, you don't know how scared I am, there are so many cars speeding on the road, I just think, who are they, where are they going, is there anyone like me In this way, for love, for that person, it hurts my heart all day and all night. There are also kind people who stop and ask me if I want to give you a ride. He said girl, he said I don’t want money, don’t worry about not calling Fare. At the end, even the police cars stopped, thinking that I was mentally insane, or that I was abandoned and ran away from home." He couldn't help but laugh, "What happened later?" "Later, the police dragged me into the car. You didn't expect it. Within a day, I was not only in the police, but also in an ambulance." He couldn't handle it. "I've figured it out, Qiao Lei. From today on, let's completely break the story. I have to move forward." "Farewell," he took her hand, hooking her pale little finger with his finger, very resembling the movement of his friends playing games when they were young, "Hanging on the hook, it must not be changed for a hundred years!" "Can I not turn over this page of mine, my heart, you don't understand?" ——Qiao Lei, you are here again, you always choose to confess to me when I am most depressed, can you correct this problem? She patiently persuaded him, "Qiao Lei, don't be obsessed. I know you are good to me. You may not even realize that you have a good impression of me because you have received favors from me in elementary school. Then Then I magnified this kind of good feeling, thinking it was love. Listen to me, in fact, it is far from love, you will understand after you slowly figure it out." "It's not like this..." He stammered and explained, "When I went to the teacher's office to go through the admission procedures, the first thing I saw when I saw you..." She no longer wanted to listen, "Qiao Lei, I'm tired, take me back. Look, it's windy." He had to keep his mouth shut. After being discharged from the hospital, Bieqiong lay at home for two full weeks before recovering. After discussing with Qiao Lei, I was not in a hurry to go to work. Anyway, Jiang Xiaoguang rewarded her with a month's vacation. How could he be so generous in the future? My mother didn't know why, and always thought that she had gone abroad for training, so I caught her on the phone and urged her to go on a blind date. She, who had always been repulsed by this, fully agreed, which shocked her old man. "Oh, my little girl. Your mother heard it right, right?" She laughed so much that she could almost hear the trembling of the room on the phone, "You promised, you agreed, right?" Since when did my mother have such low requirements for happiness? She smiled and agreed, "Yes, I agree, hurry up and send over the resources of good single men from the old ladies around you." After thinking about it, she seemed to be in a good mood, "Waiting for the widows to meet them one by one." My mother is really unambiguous. Five men were assigned in a week, and I made an appointment to meet one of them a day. "I'll be gone on the weekend. I'll give you some time to think about which one is better." For the first blind date in her life, she was really nervous, so she called Shao Xiaowei and asked her to meet with her. Didn't she say long ago that she would be the most beautiful courtesan?Why did she refuse when she received the call, as if she was trying to harm her. Unable to hold back, she continued to plead, and finally agreed. The first man was a philosophy teacher at a certain university, five years older than her, and because he still had classes in the afternoon, the location was set at a tea restaurant outside the university. The person looks a bit like someone from an alien planet, with protruding browbones, a broad and thick nose, a square face, and a wide forehead, but it is not ugly, just a bit weird. It is very enjoyable to eat while eating, which makes the appetite of those who watch it soar.We chatted for a few words, but we didn't have nothing to say. Generally speaking, it made sense.Please don't ask for AA when paying the bill, be polite and elegant. Shao Xiaowei couldn't help sneering frequently, of course she didn't like him. Bie Qiong sent the other party away in a self-restraining manner. Today's era is the era of a golden moment, and the teacher's efficiency is extremely high. It didn't take long for her mother to call. "What is Aunt Huang? She introduced such a bastard to me. I thought she was a good person. I couldn't do square dancing. She even found a video on the Internet to dance with me. I didn't expect her to be this This kind of person, my old lady wants to break up with her..." She was confused and asked for a long time before she realized that the teacher man didn't like her. It’s all right if you don’t match, it will take a year and a half to make up your mind to sign a contract and pay the money when buying a house, not to mention choosing a partner with whom you will spend most of your life.But the key point is that if there is no match, out of politeness or self-restraint, no matter what kind of dissatisfaction you have with the other party or what kind of shortcomings you see, everyone will tactfully give a polite and passable reason. But the teacher man's reason was straightforward, and his reason for refusal was—— A little older. Bie Qiong was so angry that she wanted to flip the table, Nima, you are a bit old, I didn't pick you, but you picked me. Shao Xiaowei said: "What people say is correct. He is born in the 80s, and you are born in the 85s. He can find people born in the 80s and 90s. What about you? You can only find people born in the 70s and 80s. But people born in the 70s And the single men born in the 1980s, one day when the conditions are good, they have a good job, a house and a car, they are all willing to find a beautiful young girl born in the 90s, you can just say you, where is it good? Why do people put young and beautiful If you don’t look for a little girl, are you looking for an older single young woman?” "I……" "You want to say that you are pretty, you can do a good job, and you have a lively, cheerful and kind personality? Please, how much is this worth? People will say, I am young and beautiful and have big breasts. Do you have any?" She was about to refute, when she suddenly heard a low, suppressed laughter from behind, Shao Xiaowei stood up first, "Wen Chenrui, I sound like you, get out, why are you sneaking around?" "I didn't do it on purpose," Wen Chenrui simply walked over and sat next to Shao Xiaowei, "I came to the Book Wholesale City to see what new books are on the market. After shopping for a long time, I came here for dinner. As soon as I sat down, the two of you came in. Desire to fight Let's say hello, and I'm afraid that it will spoil the matter between the two of you." Bie Qiong, who was sitting opposite him, responded indifferently, "Oh." He must have heard it all, and she wished she could send someone to tell him. Shao Xiaowei found a reason to leave first, she grabbed her skirt, "No need, Xiaowei, you don't have to go, we have nothing to say alone." Unexpectedly, he said seriously: "Shao Xiaowei, I'm sorry today, I have something to say to her alone, so I'd better trouble you to go first." This is really a rare thing, Shao Xiaowei left with a smile. She cut to the point, "Tell me, what's your business?" "I heard you were sick a while ago?" "Ok." "Is it better now?" She shrugged, "As you can see." "Do you have to talk to me like this?" "Otherwise," she stared at him, "what kind of attitude do you think I should use to talk to you?" He looked away, and his frustration suddenly leaked out, very similar to the regretful expression when he found out the scores lost due to sloppy when handing out the papers in the student days, "It's nothing." "Wen Chenrui, don't play charades anymore. Since you bumped into it today, let's talk about it." She stirred the straw in the glass, "I don't want to pursue it because of some reason before. It's too meaningless and stupid. I don't I know why you came back, and I don’t know if you are single now. Now, I just hope to work hard and find someone to marry as soon as possible. I hope that when we meet again, we will still be friends. I wish your store a prosperous business.” These words have been accumulated for a long time, and when she speaks in one go, the words and expressions are very precise. "Bie Qiong, I..." He seemed to have made up his mind to say it, "Everyone said that the love in the student days was for the future married life, as a practice. But I never thought so , since I decided to hold hands, I was thinking about my life at the time. So when you asked me to go to the city of medical school, I was afraid that if you did this, it would affect your future, and if you did not do that, it would prove that you might not have you I imagined that I loved me so much. At that time, I... did have difficulties, but of course, in my eyes today, these difficulties seem extremely naive and powerless." He must have had a hard time these years, right?The young man who was domineering, confident, and in control of everything has disappeared. His chin is covered with blue stubble, which can be seen from the weather.When we were in love, there were only light stubbles on both sides of the mouth. At that time, she often touched it with her fingers mischievously, pricking it. It felt like touching the top of a child with a shaved head. It was the most suitable for killing boredom. . She heard him say: "In these years, I have stayed in Beijing, Shanghai, Guangzhou... I have been there for a while. There are many opportunities for business trips and the salary is not bad, but no matter how rich life is, when I wake up at midnight, there always seems to be someone The voice said to me, this is not your city." So, is that why he came back? "Over the years, some were introduced by colleagues and friends, and some were offered by girls. I have been in contact with several girls one after another. I thought, if they can accept it, I will try to date them. But every time I tell the truth, my partner seems to see a Strange person, pale with fright, or pretending to be calm, but quickly finds a reason to leave quickly, and has not had any contact since then." Is the answer ready? Bieqiong's heart was pounding, and it seemed to beat rhythmically. The beat became more and more urgent, and the sound became louder and louder, as if she wanted to break through her chest and break through the roof, enjoying the explosive strength and joy of breaking through all the bindings and obstacles. pleasure. “我用了这么多年的时间才想明白，别琼，我宁愿对别人说，也不敢找你透露分毫，我能够接受她们的拒绝，可绝对不是你，如果是你……”他的声音越来越轻，直至凝噎。 I do not know how long it has been. “如果是你，”他说，“对我来说，只意味着毁灭。” 她屏住气息。 “大一入学没几天，那时我们还在军训，校方组织大家去体检。结果我……被查出来，……是乙型病毒性肝炎。” 说完这段话，他的脸色煞白，垂着头，似绝症病人听医生交代病情。 “之前高考体检时还是正常，我想，也许是有次口腔溃疡，我在外头小贩吃了什么脏东西，传染上的吧。被查出来后，院长还曾为我说情，但因我选的专业要求，最后处理的结果是不对外宣布，他还好心地生平第一次动用了他的关系帮我改志愿，你知道的，当时我非医学院不报，我所报的专业因为体检结果，是没有一家肯录取我的。” I see. 她想起乔磊说他家中在政府那里有人脉，谣言真是可怕。 已过午饭时间，茶餐厅的客人寥寥无几，服务员们坐在最里侧吃工作餐，无人注意这对正在说话聊天的男女。 “这件事情，让一直意气风发的我性情大变。我又了解到很多企业在招聘时，严格要求查肝五项，不合格者一律不予录用，彻底对未来的人生充满了绝望。到了N大后，每天的日子，不过是混吃等死。我连自杀都想过……可一想到我爸，就又怂了。那时的我确实顾及不了你，看到任何人都觉得是仇人，恨不得找个炸弹抱住几个人轰上天，大家一起同归于尽，垫背的人越多越好。那时的我，恨你们身体健康，恨你们可以复读，今年考得不理想，复读再考来年还有希望。我恨你们可以放声大笑，恨你们有交好的朋友同出同入……我恨所有人。尤其恨你！” ……原来是这样。 “我是在那个时期特别介意你出尔反尔改志愿去了A大的，之前还能理解，可那时只有仇恨。说什么爱我，为我可以牺牲一切，不过都是骗人的。既然如此，还在我面前演什么戏？你越找我，我越恼怒……陷在怪圈里出不来，连宿打友鼾我都觉得是错的。” 她不知道要说什么，这答案来得太晚太突然，她需要好好消化一阵。 “目前全球3.5亿乙肝病毒携带者中，有近1亿是中国人，全球每年大约70万病毒性肝炎相关死亡人群中，我国占近半。有很长一段时间，我的脑子里，已经装不下别的东西，全部都是关于这个病情的冲击，生命、未来、前途、理想……全部是泡影，当时的我，哪里还敢去奢谈他妈的什么爱情！” 他压抑太久，说话的时候，嘴唇都是哆嗦的。 “大学毕业后，找工作屡屡受阻，社会对这个人群的歧视，远远超出我的想象。我曾经看过一组资料，提到对于感染乙肝病毒的影响，调查显示，8.5%的乙肝病毒携带者是因乙肝病毒感染而失业；15.4%的人因为乙肝病毒没有找到工作；44.8%的病毒携带者已经就业，但单位不知道自己的病情；只有19.6%的就业没有受到乙肝影响。如果知道自己身边的人感染了乙肝病毒，39.2%的人会像以前一样与之交往；23.6%的人表示会与感染者减少接触，并保持一定的距离；33.7%的人表面没什么，可是心里会介意；3.5%的人甚至会立刻避而远之。得知自己丈夫、妻子患了乙肝而闹离婚的这种行为，21%的人会选择离婚……这些，这些数据，会让你了解，我曾经过的是什么样的生活。” 她从未见到他这般萎靡不振的样子。 “算了，不说这个。”他苦笑着，“后来我遇到了一个好医生，虽然目前全世界都无药物能彻底根治，但慢慢对病情有了正确的认识。尤其得知，国家劳动和社会保障部、卫生部曾经联合发出《关于维护乙肝表面抗原携带者就业权利的意见》，明确要求医疗机构不得将乙肝病毒血清学检查作为体检常规项目。除饮食、托幼和军校等机构，其它用人单位不得强制要求应聘者进行乙肝检查。至于婚检，早就取消了。” 他的力量在慢慢聚集，“我想通了，如果这是我的命，那我也只好选择接受它。包括现在，虽然社会对乙肝病毒携带者还有一定的偏见和歧视，但过了这么多年，我早不是当年的我。” 他终于回归正常状态，“别琼，早就想找机会告诉你，可一直不知道如何开口，今天既然遇到，拣日不如撞日，那就和盘而出吧。” “现在讲出来，有舒服一点吗？”她不知道如何安慰他。 “有，当然，”他的眼睛有些湿润，“还恨我吗？” 在知晓全部真相后，只有百感交集。 她问：“之前你的qq签名，老婆会武术，我也挡不住，是……” 他惊讶于她耿耿于怀的居然是这个，“你一直记得？” "Ok." “是邵小尉给我打电话，说她不管什么原因我执意和你分手，你一直走不出来。让我改个签名，你看到了，也就彻底死心了。” 哈，邵小尉，居然是邵小尉。 “请原谅我，”他坦诚地看着她，“当时我年少，不够有担当，也不敢和家人谈，只顾逃避，迁怒他人。我顺风顺水惯了，从没跌过这么大的跟头。更别提什么积极的困难观。” 她唯有微笑。 “别琼，这些年，横跨在你我之间的事情有太多，我明白的，就算我们两个都想回到当初，恐怕也是有心无力了。” 他说这话时，也许是错觉，别琼觉得他的眼中似有流星飞速驰过，像极了绝症病人盯着医生宣布搞错了病历或是误诊，可那希望之光，一瞬即逝。 “听完你说的这些，让我对你的经历充满怜悯且敬畏，可如果回到感情这件事本身，你刚才问我，是不是还恨你，如果让我说心里话，那么我的回答是，是！当然！说穿了，你对我们之间的感情根本没有信心，诚然有你生病这个强大的借口，发生那么大的颠覆性的改变，不知如何应对，我都理解。可对我来说，我爱的人哪怕得了白血病、癌症……任何绝症，不论是他执意主动驱赶，还是我无情主动离开，生病都绝对不是让我和他分开的理由。” 眼泪夺眶而出，一颗一颗滴在面前的透明玻璃餐桌上，“不论有着多么大的改变，如果我们分开，一定是我们当中的任何一个变了心。你对我、对我们的感情没信心，我不责怪你，我也没有资格责怪你。要怪，只能怪，那时我们年少，心智不成熟，对爱情的理解和表达方式也不同，更因为，”她停顿了好一会才说出，“也许是，你我从来都不曾懂得，什么，是奋不顾身，爱上一个人。” 他默默看着她。 “比起'奋不顾身爱上一个人'，在这场恋爱中，我们都是最自私的那个，我们都更爱自己多一点。” 纠结、不甘心了这么多年，也许这才是别琼追求的真相吧。 她想起生长在中国沿海及东南亚各地近陆的浅海泥沙中的一种名为“血蚶”的贝类，壳形似心脏，上下两壳质厚而隆起，因肉柱呈紫赤色、多血，而得名。潮汕和部分其他沿海城市的居民，喜欢浇上滚烫的开水直接吃，血蚶受热开壳，常常血流满野。她在同学家第一次看到同学全家围坐在地板上，边看电视边吃，个个满嘴鲜血，说话时露出的牙齿、牙床也如是，吓得她误以为入食人族一家，半天不敢动弹。 在同学反复游说下，她尝了一个，入口鲜美至极，随后大笑着加入“茹毛饮血”队列，同学故意将“鲜血”抹满她脸颊、双臂，同学母亲嗔怪着阻拦，最后全家均加入战争，闹成一团，好不畅快。 回到麦城后偶尔想起这美味，嘴馋网购，隔日上午收到，拆开卖家封好的泡沫箱，取出上面覆盖的保温用的冰袋，下面的血蚶满是泥沙，脏得要命。初时小人之心以为卖家为占分量故意为之，不由怒火中烧，正欲打电话跟店家理论，突然发现最下面夹带了一张白纸，上书—— “我们没有清洗血蚶的泥沙，是因为这样成活率高，保证血蚶味道的鲜美。请大家不要误会我们是为了多占分量。另：我们每斤实际发的是一斤三两。” I see. 也许她和温沈锐之间曾让她觉得荡气回肠的爱情，正因为迟迟没有得到解答，就似这血蚶身上的泥沙，才得以使得她心心念念放不下如此之久吧。 洗净泥沙去掉层层包裹的想象之光，终于照见真相。 如初见血蚶时的骨寒毛竖，到现在的坦然接受，她潘然醒悟，原来解脱的感觉竟是这样好。 所有让人深恶痛绝的言行：出尔反尔，背信弃义、口是心非、阴险狡诈、卸磨杀驴、同流合污、过河拆桥、挑拨离间、为虎作伥、无恶不作、心怀叵测、小肚鸡肠、两面三刀、恩将仇报、暗箭伤人、落井下石、无事生非……使我们曾有过这样愤怒、痛苦、绝望的时刻，我们也曾，采取了上述文字中提到的方式去安慰身边的亲朋好友。 但终有一天生活会以你意想不到的方式，如闪电劈中风雨中摇曳的大树，如高楼坠物砸向正常行走的路人，如漫过堤顶卷走筑堤泥土顺流而下的洪水淹没村庄，总要发生在自己身上，以惨重无法挽回的代价，才能明白什么是瞋目切齿、暴跳如雷、令人发指、怒不可遏、七窍生烟、肝肠寸断、哀哀欲绝。