Chapter 35 Section thirty-four

In my short twenty-two-year-old life, I have never heard such a sentence that made me——I didn’t sleep well for a week... Even when I fall asleep, I still have some messy dreams. I dreamed of Zhuang Xu again. In fact, I can't say I dreamed of him, because he never appeared in my dream. I dreamed that Jiang Rui and I were in the small garden of my uncle’s house, and I confidently asked Jiang Rui: "How is it, is it almost the same, please help me analyze it from the perspective of a boy, is it safe to confess now? " Jiang Rui is more confident than me: "You should have rushed up a long time ago, what kind of favorability degree do you still need, does my sister need it?"

Then I was walking in high spirits on the way to find Zhuang Xu. Then I got hot sex. I sat on the bed with the quilt in my arms, and I was extremely thankful that I added an extra blanket on a whim today, otherwise the next scene would be the scene of my confession being rejected. I don't want to recall that scene at all. Although I didn't feel embarrassed or even discouraged at the time, I immediately prepared for the next fight with full confidence. The real ugly and discouragement is after knowing the relationship between Rongrong and him, after sending an apology message but not being answered, after he watched me coldly and being accused by Rongrong, and every moment after the accumulation of time...

Speaking of which, at that time, I also carefully planned... Seriously collect his information, ask his childhood sweetheart what he likes, ask Jiang Rui to help me find out what kind of girl I like, lie on the bed at night and compare myself, laughing and worrying for a while... Lin Yusen said that he stayed overnight to demonstrate the annual plan... Is that also the case? I climbed out of bed, took out my phone, and dug out the photos and text messages he sent me when I was in Shanghai. The Huangpu River under the night, half a glass of red wine on the balcony, the originally emotionless picture, looking at it now, suddenly makes people feel sour.

"I'm thinking about how to adjust the annual plan." His text message said so. How would he feel when he said this? When he said later, "I let you choose", how would he feel? I used to like Zhuang Xu so much, but if I ran to him and said, I let you choose between me and Rongrong, then I would rather kill me. Lin Yusen, why did you say that in such a firm tone? I put down my phone and lay down on the table, obviously very sleepy, but I know that I won't be able to sleep again tonight. The result of lack of sleep is that I am listless all morning. Fortunately, today...the leader is not here.I went to the cafeteria to eat at noon, and the aroma of the food did not lift my spirits.

"Xiguang, you're going to Shanghai to attend the wedding this time, so you won't have any trouble with Vice President Lin again?" I was startled suddenly, and the dishes I just picked up fell on the table. Yin Jie suddenly felt distressed, "Oh! You waste food, you are willing to throw away the braised pork so delicious, don't order it if you think it is fatty!" Who thinks there is fat...I'm not scared by you!Have a good meal and suddenly say what key words! Seeing the braised pork on the table, Yuhua also gave me a condemning look: "That's right, if you think it's too fat, you can give it to Yin Jie and me. The braised pork cooked by the new chef is very good. There are many restaurants outside. It’s not as delicious as it was burnt.”

"He was hired with a high salary." Yin Jie said vaguely while eating, "Didn't the company start to increase the subsidy for each meal this year? Hey, let me tell you, the company is so generous now, and the salary increase at the end of the year will also increase." Won't it be low?" "It's hard to say. I heard from old employees that there was basically no increase last year." "The profit in the fourth quarter of this year is so good, it should not be possible. Vice President Lin's style is different from the previous one. You can see that the cafeteria is delicious when he comes here."

"It's not something he can decide alone, right? It needs to be approved by the headquarters." Seeing that the topic turned to salary increase, I secretly breathed a sigh of relief, but on the way back to the office after dinner, Yin Jie changed the topic back again. "Xiguang, why did you offend the vice president?" "…No." "The day before yesterday he asked you to take the minutes of the meeting. What do you mean by pretending to have a stomachache and being unable to come out of the bathroom?" "All the things that are ready are stuffed here. What's the matter with asking me to sign for Vice President Lin?"

"Yeah." Yu Hua added, "Last time I was working with you on the elevator, as soon as Mr. Lin came in, why did you immediately look at your feet? Why did you run away before reaching the floor?" I just wanted to ask, why are you observing so carefully! I just don't want to exercise my little heart, can't I? I watched them silently for several seconds, and finally made a difficult choice between "silencing" and "gagging them". "How about we go out to eat tonight, squirrel mandarin fish and chicken head rice?" "Don't try to shift the focus! Actually, I don't think you offended the vice president, it's not... oh, why are you beating me? I didn't have time to say anything, you are a guilty conscience!"

Yin Jie was muttering when my cell phone rang.I went to the side to connect, and Dr. Fang's sad and angry voice came immediately: "Xiao Nie, please treat me to dinner! I want to break the news for you, that bastard, junior brother, said to help me write a thesis, just hang up on me right now. He crossed the river and demolished the bridge!" So in the evening I released Yin Jie and Yu Hua's pigeons, and sat face to face with Senior Brother Fang in a certain restaurant on Guanqian Street. "Asshole, I've helped him so much, and he hung up on me as soon as he said! Xiao Nie, you must recognize the true face of others!"

"He put you in the hospital for ten days. He did it. I have good medical ethics." "..." "And he insisted on discussing the case with us in the hospital. Of course, he also helped me write the case and discharge diagnosis... What else? Oh, have dinner together? You must know that he did all this, and kidnapped you to participate I don’t need to talk about shameless things like junior sister’s wedding, do I?” "...No need." I took a bite, "But, that, Senior Brother Fang... Are you really here to break the news?" Dr. Fang blinked, and said "Ouch", "Xiao Nie, you have been with my junior brother for a long time, and you have made progress, not bad!"

Without revealing his embarrassment, he said with a smile: "As for me, it's purely boring. With his current appearance, I'm afraid it will affect the temperament of my thesis, you understand!" …Actually, I don’t quite understand. Does the thesis still have temperament? I poked at the head of the fish that I accidentally caught, "He... told you?" "He is very sullen. If he hadn't asked for my help, he wouldn't have told me when he was chasing girls. What about the current situation, is there any need to talk about it?" Senior Brother Fang groaned, "Call me He just hung up after saying 'busy', which is obviously shameless to see Jiang Dong's elders." It turns out that there really are Jiangdong fathers... Senior Brother Fang looked at me curiously, "Xiao Nie, you still don't like my senior brother, how high-sighted you are." "..." By the way, why do I want to discuss my relationship with Lin Yusen's senior brother here, but why do I feel that there is nothing wrong with Fang Senior Brother's gossip? "The benefits can only be enjoyed by paying insurance premiums." I whispered. There is nothing in this world more disturbing than getting something for nothing. "What welfare? What insurance money? Xiao Nie, I can't understand what you said. This profound feeling is more and more like my junior brother." "...Brother, eat fish!" I graciously used the serving chopsticks to pick up a chopstick of squirrel mandarin fish for him. Senior Brother Fang ate very fast. After the two bowls of rice went down, he put down his chopsticks and said contentedly, "Well, I'm on duty night today, so I won't see you off. I sent a message to Junior Brother. He will come and deliver it for me in a while." You go back." I was dumbfounded for a long time: "Brother, you are too obvious..." Senior Brother Fang said without any shame: "Speak? Oh, I'm sorry, we surgeons are usually too delicate in operations, but in life, they are very simple and rough. I'm used to applauding!" While listening to his nonsense, I suddenly raised my head and saw Lin Yusen walking towards us through the noisy lobby. Senior Brother Fang followed my gaze and looked back, and then turned back with a tut: "See, my junior brother, when he took a lunch box to eat, he could knock down a cafeteria. Although he is a little older now, he is not too handsome Is there any less coquettishness in the past?! Xiao Nie, think about it, if you take him down, all the seniors and sisters in our medical school will travel all the way to envy and hate you. Thank you for being so grateful! Not excited? Are you happy?" "Brother, don't scare her away." Accompanied by the pleasant voice, Lin Yusen has already come to the front, and the light gray coat casually brushes the hair on my shoulders. I suddenly felt that the whole air was different. He took off his coat and put it on the chair next to him, and sat down gracefully: "I haven't eaten yet, do you mind if I eat the rest?" "Xiao Nie treats guests today, if she has no objection, I have no objection." I shook my head quickly, and then started staring at the fish head in my bowl, seriously studying how to eat it. When I figured out what to do, Senior Brother Fang wiped his lips and ran away.Lin Yusen ate without saying a word, as if he was very hungry.Also, near the end of the year, the company already has a lot of things to do, and something went wrong with the expansion, and he has to go to the Shanghai headquarters to hold the annual meeting. Mr. Zhang doesn't care about things, he is very busy... If he wasn't so busy, I wouldn't be able to hide from him so smoothly... "Let's go." "Ah...Okay!" I quickly stood up and reached for my wallet, but Lin Yusen held it down with one hand. I couldn't help but look up at him, meeting his eyes for the first time today. It was obviously a short moment, but I suddenly noticed many details that I hadn't noticed before, for example, his eyelashes were actually very long, which made his eyes look particularly bottomless. "I come." "But, today I am asking Senior Brother Fang..." His bottomless eyes stared at me, "I used to play around with you, but now it's all about the horses and horses, can I still let you pay the bill?" I didn't know how to answer the conversation, so I silently withdrew my hand.Watching him swipe his card to pay the bill, he followed him out of the restaurant. The cold and the liveliness came at the same time. I flinched a little, Lin Yusen glanced at me, "My parking place is not far away." "Oh." I replied. After walking a few steps, Lin Yusen said, "I didn't know he was looking for you today. You don't have to pay too much attention to what he said." Don't worry? "He said that at that time I didn't have to stay in the hospital for ten days at all." Lin Yusen let out an "ah" and smiled, "It turned out to be a small report by leapfrogging." "Is that so?" "That's right. At that time, scheming and medical ethics didn't matter. I agreed to any unequal treaty." I can't answer the phone again.I found myself underestimating Lin Yusen's calmness and...shameless, I thought he would at least feel embarrassed.However, I suddenly thought of myself a long time ago, who seemed to be so frank and direct when I liked someone. I couldn't help but began to think, what would it be like if the first person I met was Lin Yusen? Will I fall in love with him at first sight? Did he like me first, or did I like him first? Two people are so straight to the point, will hit it off... That's probably fine too... "If only I knew you first." As soon as the words fell, I was annoyed, why I said what I thought in my heart without knowing it.This is really, not very appropriate. Really, why do I behave abnormally when I meet Lin Yusen now? Sure enough, Lin Yusen fell silent for a long time, the lights on the side of the road cast a shadow on his face, his expression was extraordinarily deep and unpredictable.I was a little uneasy, so I deliberately found a topic and said, "You want to help Senior Brother Fang write a paper?" It took him a while to answer me, a little lightly: "Well, his thesis is related to a topic I studied before, and I just give some advice." I suddenly remembered a long-standing doubt: "Brother Fang, do you know that you..." Lin Yusen quickly grasped my unfinished meaning, and still said lightly: "I know, I had a car accident on the highway before, and it was the closest to Suzhou, and I was sent directly to his hospital." I suddenly got a little annoyed with Dr. Fang. "Then he still asks you to write a paper!" Isn't this exposing scars! He turned his head in surprise, smiled suddenly, and dispelled the gloom: "Facing the handicapped life. It's enough to be hypocritical for more than a year, can it be hypocritical for a lifetime?" I was slightly taken aback. This person always and inadvertently exudes a heart-wrenching momentum. "Actually, I have reflected on it these few days." He sighed slightly and said, "I was too impulsive that day, and I scared you." He suddenly jumped to this topic, and I pretended to disappear naturally, and said a little stumbled, "No, no." "Where is it? It's only been a few days, and the dark circles under my eyes have come out." He looked at me tenderly and blamed himself, "Xiguang, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said those things when you were unprepared. I'm sorry for the inconvenience." I stood up abruptly and stared at him blankly. Why is this sentence so familiar, as if... I have said it myself. ——Sorry, I didn't know you were with Rong Rong, otherwise I wouldn't have told you that.Hope it didn't bother you. Suddenly a wave of sadness hit me. The worst apology in this world is to apologize for what you like. "do not talk like that!" How should I tell him that his love is very precious, although I dare not accept it, but I cherish it, respect it and move it, and I am restless and tossing and turning because there is nothing to repay, not to avoid it. But as clumsy as I am, I can only repeat over and over again, "Don't say that." He also seemed to be stunned for a few seconds, probably my reaction scared him.A hint of annoyance appeared on his face, and he looked a little helpless: "Okay, I won't say that. But what did I say? It made you almost cry. Are you crying so much?" "Don't apologize." "Okay, I don't apologize. I just...see you hiding from me so hard." He smiled. "I won't be like this in the future, I promise." "Then don't hide from me, okay? You're tired, and it's hard for me to cooperate and let you hide." Uh? Isn't it because I'm smart and clever that I managed to avoid him these days? He smiled wryly, "I try to find a way to go to the factory and Shanghai every day. I can't think of an excuse to go to Shanghai tomorrow, so why don't you go?" I suddenly felt guilty, and nodded indiscriminately: "No." "real?" Nod again. "Well, why don't you work overtime with me today?" I nodded... halfway through, "Huh?" I finally found the rhythm of getting along with Lin Yusen in the "daily" overtime.At night after working overtime, I finally didn't suffer from insomnia anymore and had a good night's sleep. When I got up in the morning and looked at myself in the mirror, the dark circles under my eyes had disappeared. I seriously thought about the possibility that I had already suffered from overtime obsessive-compulsive disorder. Why did I look good when I worked overtime, and I was listless when I didn’t work overtime? ? It was a busy day as usual. Lin Yusen has not been in the office for several days, and he has accumulated a lot of work. He has been sitting behind the desk all morning. I just need to turn my head to see his tall and straight figure behind the glass window. Of course I won't turn my head away. I also have a lot of work to do. I have to make a budget in the morning, and the prizes to be distributed at the annual meeting in the afternoon have been delivered. My colleagues in the logistics department and I are downstairs to collect some prizes. The colleague in the logistics department is called Xiao Duan, and I am quite familiar with him. He ordered the goods, and I checked the list and chatted occasionally.While chatting, Xiao Duan suddenly mentioned a movie, "I don't know if you have seen it, I heard it is very exciting, if you don't watch it, it will be off the list, on Saturday I..." "This movie is not for her." A warm voice suddenly sounded from the side. Xiao Duan and I turned our heads to look at the past, and the vice president of Linyu Forest and several directors of the factory department were standing behind us. All eyes were on him. He looked calm and composed, and added without haste: "Last time, she fell asleep halfway through watching it in the movie theater." I:"…" Very good, now everyone's eyes are on me, except Lin Yusen. He seemed to have never said those two sentences, "You communicate with the construction party, the drainage system plan needs to be revised..." If it weren't for the wandering expressions of the supervisors, I would have suspected that the two words just now were just my hallucinations. The group of them left quickly. Xiao Duan and I were left looking at each other, and finally Xiao Duan smiled awkwardly: "Did you really fall asleep watching this movie?" "yes." As if... still leaning on his shoulder. "Actually, I just want to ask you if you've seen it, whether it's good or not. I want to go see it with my girlfriend on Saturday." "Actually, it's not bad, at least the first half is pretty good, when I fell asleep because..." Because the breath next to me is so reassuring... After the prizes were collected, Xiao Duan ran back upstairs to ask someone to come down and move the things. I stayed behind and guarded the things before reviewing the records and making notes. For a while, I was the only one left at the gate of the office building. After writing the notes for a while, I stopped writing and stood alone, thinking about it, and then laughed. Suddenly, he was slapped heavily on the back. Turning around, Yin Jie rushed towards me, "Ah, I've heard it all, Nie Xiguang, if you deny that Vice President Lin is chasing you, I'll break up with you!" Just like what Lin Yusen said, it is not my burden that he chases me, and there is nothing invisible.Even if I haven't let go and can't accept it now, there is no need to be so coy and evasive. I once pursued someone so bravely, why can't I be pursued by someone bravely at the same time? I sighed for a long time, as if I suddenly let go of the shackles that appeared in my heart at some point. Yin Jie was still grabbing my arm to change it, pressing me for an answer.I smiled at her, and in her expectant eyes, said two words seriously—— "you guess?"