Chapter 8 Southward 2

5. Moonlight Yi Ren returned to the place where he lived, and saw B sitting on the porch in a daze, watching the dark coast through the pine forest.Hearing Yi Ren's footsteps, she turned her head and called him: "Yi Jun! Where did you go? We had only four people when we sang poetry today. You didn't go, nor did the two good-looking female students. It was just me and K-jun and the ugliest female student, C. Where is Madam asking you!" "I'm sorry, I went for a walk in Tateyama, so I couldn't come back in time. Have you had dinner yet?" "I've eaten. The bath soup is ready, the master is waiting for you to take a bath."

After taking a bath and having dinner, Yi Ren wrote a long diary under the lamp.I also remembered Mignon's song, and what she said, the scenery of the coast at sunset, the sad mood, his tears, her slender hands, the smile of Mount Fuji, the ripples of the waves, the Footsteps, all the places he saw, heard and felt in this afternoon were recorded.After writing for more than two hours, he found it more and more interesting as he wrote it. After he finished writing, he read and reread, revised and revised, and it took another hour. The people in the villages on the coast had already fallen into a deep sleep.The air in the cold and silent room was pressing on his head and shoulders. He looked back into the room, only his enlarged shadow on the wall was moving there, except for the sound of rats fighting on the roof. No other sound vibrates the air.The fire in the fire bowl also disappeared. Sitting in the house, he felt uncomfortable, so he opened the door gently, dragged the straw sandals, and went down to the courtyard. The mountain has gone.Stepping under the shadow of the pine tree, covered with gray moonlight, he went through the pine forest again and walked to the seashore.The scenery on the quiet seaside has a more miserable and clean atmosphere than in the daytime.In the moonlight that was not yet setting, he walked back and forth once, and he walked to the place where he and she walked during the day.When it was almost time, he stopped and turned to look at the footprints of the two of them on the beach during the day.Like a dream seeker, he searched for a long time but couldn't find the footprints of the two of them.He stood up and walked westward for a while, then fell down to search, and found the footprints of his own rubber shoes.Following his footsteps, her footsteps were also found.His chest seemed to be jumping, and he suddenly thought of two verses in the Bible.

But I say untoyou, that whosoever look the woman tolust after her hath committed adultery with her already in hisheart. And if thy right eye offendthee, pluck it out, and castit from thee; for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. Although Yi Ren has been in contact with the woman several times, at this moment, he feels that his body has returned to the time when he was a virgin. He feels that his heart towards O is really pure and noble, without any evil thoughts. So, when he thought of these two verses, he felt another conflict in his heart.He stood up and closed his eyes, thinking silently.He wanted to ask God to help him, but his philosophical rationality would not allow him to pray. He closed his eyes and stood there for four or five minutes. He shook his head, sighed, and walked back.As he walked, he turned his head to the woods to the south, looking deeply.There are no lights to be seen there, only a dim layer of moonlight, covering the top of the woods, a black shadow of the woods, reminding people of mysterious events.He looked at it once, and said to himself:

"She must live in this forest. I don't know if she sleeps or not. She may be watching the moonlight there. Oh, pity my life. Pity my long and failed career!" The moon was lowered for a while, and the light became grayer. There seemed to be a ship sailing across the sea. He glanced at it. In the gray light, he saw a black shadow like a monster moving slightly on the sea. He suddenly Feeling scared, a gust of cool wind swept across his face again, he suffered from a cold spasm, and walked home with his head bowed and three steps.After falling asleep, he felt a woman's voice calling him outside the door!After listening carefully, it was indeed the voice of Mignon's song.He ran out and followed her to the beach.The moon was about to set, and the western sky turned red and black.He looked around and felt that the sea, woods and beaches had also turned red and black.He looked at her and saw that her face was reflected by the red and black around her, and she was as pale as a dead person.He wanted to talk to her, but couldn't think of anything to say.She only had tears in her eyes, and looked at him silently.In the middle of the silence, the two of them stood still for a while, then she turned around and walked towards the woods.He immediately chased after her, but when he reached the mouth of the woods, he suddenly met the whore who cheated him last summer, and she walked out of the woods with a smile on her face.With a yell, he wanted to run back home, but his feet couldn't run no matter what. After a while of distress, he woke up from the dream.His body was covered in cold sweat again, and he could no longer sleep that night.He recalled what happened last summer.Last summer he was still in good health. He graduated from a high school and planned to go to university. There is still a lot of hope for his future.The hope and curiosity we felt when we changed to a higher school or moved to a better place were also brewing in his chest.At that time, his financial situation was also better than now. More than half of the 500 yuan remitted by his family was stored in the bank. He moved from N City, where he was a senior high school, to Tokyo, and stayed at the Akakura Hotel in Shiba District. After working for a week, one morning I saw an advertisement for rent in the newspaper.Since the place advertised for rent was in front of the First High School, it was not too far to go to the university.He took the tram and went to the place to have a look. It was a middle-class family.The owner surnamed N was a strong old man in his fifties or sixties, with a huge body. Although his appearance was ferocious, he responded with great respect.The two rooms on the upper floor were rented out. Yiren went upstairs to have a look and felt that the room was still clean. He was sitting down and talking to the old owner when he went up the escalator to a twenty-three-four elegant man. The woman comes.Holding a pot of tea fruit in his hand, he walked up to Yi Ren and knelt down respectfully and saluted Yi Ren.Yi Ren glanced at her, and she smiled, and gave Yi Ren a wink.Yi Ren felt shy instead.She went downstairs as usual, as if she had won a victory.After Yi Ren decided on a room, she came downstairs, and when she went out, she knelt at the door again and saw him off there with a smile on her face.Although he couldn't observe carefully, as far as he could see, the woman just now was indeed a beauty.She has a small figure, a long round face, and a bunch of black hair falling on her delicate white forehead.The eyes were very wide and very large, and Yi Ren had a lot of fantasies on the tram all the way back to his hotel.

"I also have a reputation. I have been a student of Imperial University since September. I can also support money for a year, and I still have more than 280 yuan in my savings. The third condition is a woman. Ah, money, love and fame!" Thinking of this, he unconsciously showed a smile on his face. A middle-aged woman sitting opposite him in the tram seemed to be watching him. He took out a newly published Japanese book in his suit pocket. Read the novel "Awoman". The next morning, he moved from Akakura Hotel to N's house in Hongo early in the morning.Because it was still very early, the woman I saw yesterday hadn't combed her hair yet, and her appearance with rough clothes and disheveled hair was even cuter than her appearance after makeup. When he saw her, he blushed and couldn't speak a word. come out.She just smiled and helped him sort out the things he moved from the hotel.A book box was so heavy that Yiren couldn't move it by herself, so she ran over to help Yiren move it upstairs.When moving up the escalator, Yi Ren took a step back, but she rushed into her arms, so she hugged Yi Ren gently and said:

"It's dangerous! If I'm not here, I'm afraid you're going to roll down." Yi Ren felt a layer of woman's electricity slightly spread to his body.His self-control was gone, as if he suddenly went into a hot and foggy bathroom in the cold winter, Yi Ren could only say in a daze: "Danger, danger! Thank you, thank you! I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." After Yi Ren walked away in a hurry, she was still smiling there. Seeing Yi Ren's shy look, she asked him: "Are you shy! If you're shy, I'll go downstairs!" When Yi Ren was about to reply, she turned around and went downstairs.

The heat of summer was increasing day by day, and Yi Ren's neurasthenia was getting worse day by day.Yi Ren lived in N's house for two weeks, and he knew everything about the family. Old man N is the adoptive father of the woman. The woman's name is M, and she is the biological daughter of old man N's friend. M has a man who is the son of a man. He is now a teacher in a middle school in the countryside, so he doesn't live at home. . Every day when the woman was grooming, she always took off all the clothes on her upper body, exposing her nipples and chest.When Yi Ren gets up to wash his face, he has to be tempted by her nakedness every day, so his brain disease has to get worse day by day.

One afternoon, when Yi Ren was taking a nap there, M walked up the escalator and sneaked into his tent by himself.Yiren woke up as soon as she entered the tent.Yi Ren smiled at her, and she also smiled at Yi Ren and said softly: "There's no one down there." Yi Ren stretched out a hand from the blanket covering her body, and she leaned on Yi Ren's hand and turned her body sideways into the blanket. On the second day, she and her father asked Yiren to take Kamakura to take a sea bath.Because Yi Ren doesn't like sea bathing, he said: "Sea bathing is very vulgar. We might as well go to Hakone Onsen."

Two days later, Yiren, M and M's father left Tokyo for Hakone.On the second day of staying at the Naraya Hotel in Miyashita, M decided to go to Luhu with Yiren. Old man N went back to Tokyo after lunch that day because he couldn't leave the house. After lunch, I sent old man N to the car, and Yiren went to Luhu with her.The uphill road going backwards could not last more than an hour, and she couldn't go.After finally arriving at Luhu, Yiren and her went to live in Jiguoya Hotel again.After changing clothes, sweating, and eating two cups of ice cream, she felt refreshed, closed the paper window, and fell asleep with Yiren again.

After one o'clock, when the sun was setting, Yi Ren went to take a bath with her again.After eating supper and sitting there for 20 to 30 minutes, when the upstairs was still very lively, M turned off the lights. The next day was very hot, Yi Ren and her lived in Luhu for another day, and they returned to Tokyo in the afternoon of the third day. When Yiren and M returned to the door of their home in Hong Kong, old man N greeted them and said: "M! Mr. W came out of the hospital!" "Ah! This... Is the disease cured, is it completely cured!" There was a very happy expression on M's face. Yi Ren thought W was her relative, so he was not surprised. After walking to the house, he saw a man in his thirties sitting in her room.The man's body was very majestic, and his face was full of wine and flesh. When he saw Yi Ren coming in, he started a salute with Yi Ren. Old man N said to Yi Ren:

"This person is Mr. W. He has lived in our house for two years. He has graduated from a liberal arts university this year. He also knows your name and name, because he studies Chinese, so he has read your article in a magazine. poetic." While talking to W, M took off his clothes, took a towel and wiped the sweat off his body, and after wiping, handed the towel to Yiren and said: "You wipe it too!" Yi Ren didn't think it looked good, so he reluctantly wiped the sweat off his face.Although Yi Ren and W met for the first time, they always felt that they could not be with him.For some unknown reason, Yi Ren always felt that W was his enemy.After a few gossips, Yiren went upstairs to get a towel and soap, and then went out to take a shower.After taking a shower and coming back, Yi Ren heard M talking and laughing at the door, as if he liked it very much.After Yi Ren entered, M said to him: "Mr. W invited us to eat chicken tonight, because he recovered from his illness, and today is the anniversary of his leaving the hospital." M also said that W suffered from kidney disease and stayed in the hospital for two months, and was released from the hospital today.Yi Ren vaguely agreed and went upstairs.That night, Yi Ren suffered from insomnia again, opened his eyes, but couldn't sleep at all.At twelve o'clock, he heard the door of M's room downstairs gently open, and M's footsteps walked step by step into W's room next to her.After chattering a few words, M's characteristic whining sound came out, and Yi Ren seemed to have been splashed with cold water, his beating heart stopped, and the blood in his brain also congealed. Living.His ears stood up like big ears, and he seemed to be able to tell every move downstairs, W's fat body, M's half-opened and half-closed eyes, her hair scattered on the pillow, her Her lips and tongue, her scent of powder mixed with sweat, the trembling of her lower body... He couldn't stand it anymore when he thought of this.The more I want to sleep, the more I can't sleep.The rumbling sound downstairs was transmitted from the floor to his eardrums.He didn't dare to make a sound, and he didn't dare to move his body.The anguish and regret in his chest suddenly rose up like a storm, and two cold tears flowed from the corners of his eyes to the base of his ears, and then dripped onto the pillow from the base of his ears. When it was about dawn, she went back to her own home with her feet and hands. Yiren listened for a while, and felt that the sound downstairs had died down.After tossing and turning several times, he fell asleep.After not being able to sleep for more than one hour, he woke up again.When I went downstairs to wash my face, both M and W were still sleeping there. Only the old man N came down from a hut across the yard (it turned out that the old man slept in this hut), wiped his eyes and said to Yi Ren: "Good morning!" Yi Ren agreed, finished hurriedly, put on his leather shoes, and ran outside.His mind was a beehive, and he didn't know what to do.He walked wildly for a while, but he came to the intersection where the trams in Kasugamachi interchanged.Regardless of his innocence, he jumped on a tram and rode there, changed cars several times in a daze, and the tram arrived at the end of Meguro.The sun was already very high, and after walking up and down Tiancheng Road for more than ten minutes, he felt his head hurt from the sun. He touched it with his hand and realized that he hadn't brought his hat with him when he came out.Looking at his body and feet, he himself felt amused.He only wore a white silk pajamas, and a pair of white leather boots on his bare feet.He felt so ashamed that he wanted to go back, but he couldn't go back. After walking around for a while, he sat down on a grass under the shade of a tree.I took out the wallet next to me and took a look. There were three five-yuan bills and two or three yuan change in the bag. Fortunately, the account books of Xixi Bank were also in the wallet. When I opened it, only one hundred and twenty yuan were left. .He sat quietly for a while, thought for a while, and suddenly remembered the Chicang Hotel where he stayed a month ago.He stood up and walked, crossed several village roads, found a rickshaw driver's house, took a rickshaw, and then rushed straight to Chicang Hotel.Under the front curtain of the car, he thought about the daydream he had imagined on the tram when he came back from seeing the house a month ago, and unconsciously shed two big tears. "Fame, money, women, what do I have now? Nothing, nothing. I... all I have is my dying body." When we arrived at the Akakura Hotel, the servants in the hotel saw him and laughed at him: "Mr. Yi! Have you been robbed by robbers?" Yi Ren couldn't answer a word, so he went up to the account desk and wrote a note, saying to the servant: "You took this note and went to N's house at No. XXX, XX Town, Hongo, and moved my things here." Yi Ren silently went to sit in an empty room for a while, all kinds of sad things came to his heart like a spring tide.The more he thought about it, the more he hated it, almost wanting to kill himself, two tears dripped down his cheeks one after another. After two hours the footman came back and said: "Mr. Yi, you are very kind. That woman said that you bullied her, and now you want to run away. She refused to hand over your things to me. She said that there are important matters and Your mother said, I want you to go home once. A man in his thirties who looks like a cow said you were too rude. Because of his bad words, I had a fight with him. The cow probably belonged to her man?" "What else did she say?" "She talks a lot! She says you're cowardly! Not a man. That's what she said when she read your note." "Is that so, I'm so sorry, I asked you to run for nothing." While saying this, Yi Ren took two banknotes and stuffed them into the servant's hand.When the servant was about to go out, Yi Ren called him back again and asked him to fetch some letters, envelopes, pens and inkstones.After the pen, inkstone and letter paper were brought, Yi Ren wrote a long letter to M. At ten o'clock in the morning on the third day, Yiren stood there blankly on the second-class board of the Kasuga Maru ship departing from Yokohama.He stood beside the iron railing, watching the gradually shrinking land without turning for a moment.After the ship left Tokyo Bay, he was still standing there blankly, but he could no longer see the land, because when the ship left Yokohama Port, his eyes became blurred, and the pearl-like water balls on his eyelid hairs, There are still a few that are not dry, so he can't go down to talk to other guests. The wall clock in the main room across from him struck twice, and a few more tears fell from Yi Ren's pillow. He remembered clearly what happened that afternoon, what happened at the Hakone Hotel, and what happened the night he returned from Hakone. Same thing as yesterday.The annoyance of standing on the Kasuga Maru ship in Yokohama port came alive again in his chest, and he had to taste the bitterness he had tasted at that time again.Shaking his head and turning around, he said softly: "Oh, oh, you are my angel, you should come and save me." Yi Ren remembered the song of Mignon that she sang on the beach during the day: "You poor child, did they bully you? Alas!" "Was hat man dir, du armcs kind, grtan?" Yi Ren shed tears for a while, and his heart gradually became peaceful. When the wall clock in the opposite room struck three o'clock, he had already hissed to sleep. Six, on the cliff It was past nine o'clock when Yi Ren woke up.It seemed to be raining outside the window, and the dripping sound of the eaves leaked to the ears of Yi Ren who was sleeping in the quilt.After opening his eyes and falling asleep for another quarter of an hour, he woke up.When I opened the door, a layer of light rain covered the houses, forests and coasts like ink paintings.After Yi Ren washed his face, he took out a novel by George Meah, leaned on the fire bowl and read a few pages, and breakfast came.After breakfast, they stopped for 30 to 40 minutes. K and B chatted. Yiren asked them if they had Bible class today. They said no, and the Bible class was only available on Tuesday and Friday.Yi Ren wanted to meet O wholeheartedly, so he was willing to go to Mrs. C's house a little earlier. After hearing what they said, he also felt a little disappointed. B and K went back to their own rooms when it was time for lunch. After lunch, Yi Ren read an article of George Marry's "Memory of My Dead Life", and the bell rang again.Yi Ren walked to Mrs. C's house as if running. K and B also came, as did the two female students, only O didn't come, and Yiren couldn't calm down.One minute passed, five minutes passed, and O did not come after all.The hymns were sung, the prayers were over, and everyone was about to disperse. Yi Ren wanted to ask them, but he couldn't speak after all.When the two girls were leaving, K asked them: "Why isn't Mr. O coming today?" A younger female student replied: "She's hot again today." Yi Ren had been dreaming all kinds of things there, but when he heard this, he seemed to have been sentenced to death, and the blood vessels in his body felt bursting for a moment.He put on his shoes and hurriedly followed the two female students out.When no one saw him, he caught up and asked the two female students: "I'm very sorry, where does Mr. O live, can you lead me to see her?" The two female students were walking in front, and they didn't notice that he was following them. They turned around to look at him as if they were surprised by his question. "Ah! Why didn't you bring an umbrella? We also went to Mr. O, so please go with us!" The two female students took an umbrella and lent it to him, and the two of them shared one and walked forward.After walking for ten or twenty minutes in the smoky light rain, the three of them came to the door of a newly built one-story house with a nameplate of O hanging on the door. The small house is commensurate.After the three of them opened the door and went in, an old woman came out and said: "Please come in! It's raining like this, and you still come to see her. I'm really sorry." Yi Ren followed them in and sat down in the living room first. When the old lady brought out tea, she pointed to Yi Ren and asked the two female students: "This one is..." Having said that, she saluted Yi Ren.The two female students also apologized while talking. "This one is from Tokyo. Mrs. C's friend is also a Christian.  …" Yiren also said: "My surname is Yi, we met for the first time, please take care of me in the future..." After the first meeting ceremony was over, the old woman led Yiren and the two female students to O's bedroom. O's bedroom is on the wall of the living room. Yi Ren went in and saw that O was blushing, sleeping under a crepe quilt of red flowers, with a book spread out beside the pillow.There is a fire pot behind the feet, and there is a futon beside the fire pot, which is about where the old woman is sitting.In the iron bottle on the fire bowl, there is a bottle of boiling water, where steam is generated, so the room is very warm.As soon as Yi Ren entered the bedroom, she could smell the fragrance of perfume and powder, which was probably the peculiar smell of a virgin's boudoir.After the old woman led them in, she moved the fire bowl forward, brought three futons from the living room, and invited them to sit down.After Yi Ren entered the ward, he felt a sad premonition, as if someone told him in front of his ears: "Poor young girl, there is no hope. Why do you bother her again by visiting her again?" Seeing her thin face flushed by body heat and her gentle and sad smile, Yi Ren felt even more uncomfortable. His eyes were red and he couldn't speak for a long time, only listening to the three of them talking softly there. : "Ah! It's raining like this, and you still come to see me. I'm really sorry." (O's words) "Wherever we are, we'll be fine at home anyway." (The first female student) "Has Mrs. C been here?" (Second female student) "Mrs. C hasn't been here yet, so why bother her with such a minor illness, you don't need to tell her." "But we've told her." "Mr. Yi only knew that you were not good after listening to us." "Ah! I'm so sorry for you to come to see me like this, but I'm afraid I'll get up tomorrow." Yi Ren felt that O's gaze, just like his own, was dodging there.So Yi Ren just bowed his head and listened to their gossip. Later, the youngest female student said to Yi Ren: "Mr. Yi! When you go back, you can tell Mrs. C that Mr. O's illness is not serious." Yi Ren sincerely raised his eyes and glanced at O, then immediately lowered his head and said: "Although it's a minor illness, it needs to be taken care of..." At this point, he felt unable to continue. The three of them sat for a while, talked a lot of gossip, then stood up and left. "Please take care!" "Maintenance!" "Be careful...!" "Thank you, thank you, I'm sorry!" Before Yi Ren left, he took another deep look at O, and O's eyes also hesitated for a while on his face.The three of them came back. Sunday was sunny and much warmer.After breakfast, Yiren and K and B walked from the village road lying in the sun to the chapel in Hojo City to worship.The countryside after the rain is full of fresh scenery.A village road made of sand, mud and silica, washed clean by the rain, reflecting the sun's rays there.The dead tree beside the road, with the blue celestial body as the background, has straight branches, and she seems to have a new energy stored there, and the time for germination is probably not too far away.The shadows cast by the dead trees in the open space are the same as the old Nanhua's pink book.Yi Ren talked to K and B for a few words, and looked at the short-sighted K, who seemed to express dislike on his face, so he stopped talking. When he arrived at the chapel, a short, short bearded priest in his thirties greeted him.This pastor and Yi Ren met for the first time. After talking for a few words, Yi Ren felt that he was also a quiet and good man.The pastor is also short-sighted and wears a pair of wire-rimmed glasses. When he speaks, his voice is very gloomy.After singing and preaching, it is time to preach freely.K, who was short-sighted, jumped onto the altar and said: "We Orientals can't do it. Our beliefs are all false. Some people believe in religion because they want to learn a few foreign words or want to socialize with female church members. So we Orientals can't do it. If we want to believe in religion, we have to believe in the same way as the original Christians. There is no need to speak foreign languages, and there is no need to socialize with female church members." Yi Ren felt that his face immediately blushed. K's words were clearly attacking him there.First, why not say "Japanese" but "Oriental"?Apart from Yi Ren, who is not Japanese here?Speaking foreign languages ​​and socializing with female congregants are Yiren's recent experience. After K.'s speech, everyone got up and prayed, and when the prayers were over, the service was over.Yi Ren just didn't understand why K opposed him to such an extent.The people who came to the church, except Mrs. C and the two female students, were all residents of Hojo City, so K's speech might not be ignored by everyone. Thinking of this, Yi Ren felt a little relieved.Before the crowd dispersed, Yi Ren took B's hand and hurried out of the church.After walking through the busy streets of Hojo, when turning east in front of the station, Yi Ren said to B: "Mr. B, I want to ask you a few words. Let's go straight, pass the station, and walk to the coast." When walking through the station to the beach, Yi Ren asked: "Mr. B, do you know who is referring to what Mr. K said just now?" "That's what you said." "Why did K attack me like this?" "You have to know where K is thinking about O. You went to Tateyama with her the day before yesterday, and he knew all about her visit to her house yesterday. He even talked about you in front of Mrs. C! " After hearing this, Yi Ren remained silent, but the sad look on his face was there to explain his psychological state.After walking for a while, he asked B again: "What's your opinion on this matter, do you think I shouldn't communicate with Mr. O?" "It's hard for me to say that, but speaking from my conscience, I sympathize with Mr. K." Yi Ren and B walked in silence for a while, and Yi Ren said to himself: "Ah! I'm Roudine again." The sun shines on the coast, and the silica in the sand glows white like diamonds.The thin waves of a layer of blue transparent sea water hit their feet.Yi Ren bowed his head and walked for a while, looked up at the sky, and felt a sense of desolation and loneliness filled his chest, the sentiment in the "Walking of the Lonely Man" written by Lu Sao that he had read, The same tide came to his mind, and he said to B: "It's almost twelve o'clock, let's go back sooner." 7. Southbound On Sunday night, there was another prayer meeting in the church in Hojo City. After the prayer, the pastor invited Yi Ren to speak on the altar.Yi Ren picked a line from "Commandment on the Mountain" as the title of his performance: "Blessed are the poor in spirit; for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven." "Blessed are the poor, and the kingdom of heaven is theirs." "When it comes to the word 'heart', it is translated as Spirit in English, Geist in German, and Esprit in French. It is probably always about 'spirit'. Blessed are those who suffer spiritually, because what Jesus suffered, It is also spiritual suffering. Speaking of the word "poverty", I think it has two meanings. The first is what we usually call "poverty", which means suffering from material to spiritual. The second is the meaning of loneliness, which is completely spiritual suffering. In my opinion, both of these meanings are included in Jesus’ words. Tolstoy said that the preaching on the mountain is Jesus The central point of the teaching. The doctrine of Jesus is nothing more than the commandment on the mountain. The arguments of the theologians in later generations are all far-fetched and heresies that deviate from the right way. Those branches and leaves are all arguments that conceal the true meaning of Jesus. , is not a candle to show the truth of Jesus. I think these few words in Tolstoy's theory of faith are very valuable. The teaching of Jesus has actually been exhausted by Jesus on the mountain. If you say The teachings of Jesus are all contained in the preaching on the mountain, so I dare say that the preaching on the mountain is all in this sentence of "blessed are the poor". Because "blessed are the poor" is the outline of the sermon on the mountain, and Jesus walked up the mountain silently Go, what he thought in his heart was a sentence that could sum up his meaning. He saw that the crowd followed him, and after sitting down on the mountain, he opened his mouth and said the outline of what he wanted to say. " "Blessed are the poor, and the kingdom of heaven is theirs." "The following sermon is an explanation and deduction of this program. I think you have studied the Gospel of Matthew, so I don't want to go on. Now I want to explain what I have to say about this program. Feelings, where can I find the proof of this sentence, and let you listen to it, it can be used as a reference for you. Our spiritual suffering is partly caused by material dissatisfaction. For example, the theft of Jean Valjean, the protagonist in "Agois Miserables", was due to material poverty, and the distress he suffered later became spiritual distress. Some economists, based on materialism, want to attribute all world-weary thoughts to material dissatisfaction. They say that if Schopenhauer had an ideal lover, his philosophy "The world of will and appearance (Dieweltals Wlleund Vorstellwi)" is gone. This is an extreme theory, but there is also a half-truth there. Therefore, material dissatisfaction can lead to spiritual distress. The words of Jesus "Blessed are the poor", which teaches us to endure poverty and not to be greedy for material satisfaction. One of the great strengths of Christianity is to teach people to respect poverty and not to be greedy for wealth in the world. There is a passage in the Bible that says , rich people have to throw away their money to enter the kingdom of heaven, because the gate of the kingdom of heaven is very narrow. St, Francis of Assis of Assis is an example of respecting the poor and despising the rich He discarded his father's and grandparents' wealth, willing to be the company of the poor, and married the poor according to his own family. What perseverance in this matter! When he took off his clothes in court and returned his father Can you not be moved by him! This is a speech that turns material poverty into spiritual poverty. Jesus taught us to despise the rich and respect the poor, just to save us from this level of spiritual suffering. From this point of view, Jesus After all, Christianity is the religion of the poor, so Christianity cannot be at odds with the current rich people and powerful people without conscience. Now we have to talk about pure spiritual poverty. Pure spiritual poverty The poor are those who are sad, kind-hearted, and thirsty for justice, and those who love peace, give favor, and are persecuted for the sake of justice. These people in our East are The so-called virtuous people, the ancients said that virtue is not alone, there must be neighbors, but now it is opposed. For the sake of peace, those who persuade people to stop fighting will go to prison instead. For the sake of justice, for the laborers Those who hold injustices will instead be imprisoned and serve hard labor. Those who resist the unreasonable legal system of the country will be burned and killed. We read the history of Europe and read that the Puritans were tortured and killed, and Ruth was persecuted by the German monarch at that time Who can not be angry when the time comes. These people who are willing to suffer the abuse of the society and are willing to make sacrifices for the people are those who feel poor in spirit! So Jesus said: "Blessed are the poor in heart, and the kingdom of heaven is their kingdom." Also.' Finally there is aA person who is poor in spirit is a person with a pure heart.This kind of person has a pure spirit and wants to love others and things, but because of social habits, national customs, and international prejudices, they cannot fully realize the love of Jesus. In this kind of human spirit上，不得不感受一种无穷的贫苦。另外还有一种人，与纯洁的心的主人相类的，就是肉体上有了疾病，虽然知道神的意思是如何，耶酥的爱是如何，然而总不能去做的一种人。这一种人在精神上是最苦，在世界上亦是最多。凡对现在的唯物的浮薄的世界不能满足，而对将来的欢喜的世界的希望不能达到的一种世纪末的病弱的理想家，都可算是这一类的精神上贫苦的人。他们在堕落的现世虽然不能得一点同情与安慰，然而将来的极乐国定是属于他们的。 " 伊人在北条市的那个小教会的坛上，在同淡水似的煤汽灯光的底下说这些话的时候，他那一双水汪汪的眼光尽在一处凝视，我们若跟了他的视线看去，就能看出一张苍白的长圆的脸儿来。这就是O呀！ O昨天睡了一天，今天又睡了大半日，到午后三点钟的时候，才从被里起来，看看热度不同，她的母亲也由她去了。O起床洗了手脸，正想出去散步的时候，她的朋友那两个女学生来了。 “请进来，我正想出去看你们呢！”（O的话） “你病好了么？”（第一个女学生） “起来也不要紧的么？”（第二个女学生） “这样恼人的好天气，谁愿意睡着不起来呀！” “晚上能出去么？” “听说伊先生今晚在教会里说教。” “你们从哪里得来的消息？” “是C夫人说的。” “刚才唱赞美诗的时候说的。” “我应该早一点起来，也到C夫人家去唱赞美诗的。” 在O的家里有了这会话之后，过了三个钟头，三个女学生就在北条市的小教会里听伊人的演讲了。 伊人平平稳稳的说完了之后，听了几声鼓掌的声音，就从讲坛上走了下来。听的人都站了起来，有几个人来同伊人握手攀谈，伊人心里虽然非常想跑上O的身边去问她的病状，然而看见有几个青年来和他说话，不得已只能在火炉旁边坐下了。说了十五分钟闲话，听讲的人都去了，女学生也去了，O也去了，只有与B，和牧师还在那里。看看伊人和几个青年说完了话之后，B就光着了两只眼睛，问伊人说： “你说的轻富尊贫，是与现在的经济社会不合的，若说个个人都不讲究致富的方法，国家不就要贫弱了么？我们还要读什么书，商人还要做什么买卖？你所讲的与你们捣乱的中国，或者相合也未可知，与日本帝国的国体完全是反对的。什么社会主义呀，大政府主义呀，那些东西是我所最恨的。你讲的简直是煽动无政府主义，社会主义的话，我是大反对的。” K也擎了两手叫着说： “Yes，yes，allright，misterB．goon，goon！” （不错不错，赞成赞成，B君讲下去讲下去！） 和伊人谈话的几个青年里边的一个年轻的人忽站了起来对B 说： “你这位先生大约总是一位资本家里的食客。我们工人劳动者的受苦，全是因为了你们资本家的缘故吓！资本家就是因为有了几个臭钱，便那样的作威作福的凶恶起来，要是大家没有钱，倒不是好么？” “你这黄口的小孩，晓得什么东西！” “放你的屁！你在有钱的大老官那里拍拍马屁，倒要骂起人来！………” B和那个青年差不多要打起来了，伊人独自一个就悄悄的走到外面来。北条街上的商家，都已经睡了，一条静寂的长街上，洒满了寒冷的月光，从北面吹来的凉风，夹了沙石，打到伊人的面上来。伊人打了几个冷痉，默默的走回家去。走到北条火车站前，折向东去的时候，对面忽来了几个微醉的劳动者，幽幽的唱着了乡下的小曲儿过去了。劳动者和伊人的距离渐渐儿的远起来，他们的歌声也渐渐儿幽了下去，在这春寒料峭的月下，在这深夜静寂的海岸渔村的市上，那尾声微颤的劳动者的歌音，真是哀婉可怜。伊人一边默默的走去，俯首看着他在树影里出没的影子，一边听着那劳动者的凄切的悲凉的俗曲的歌声，蓦然觉得鼻子里酸了起来，O对他讲的一句话，他又想出来了： “你确是一个生的门脱列斯脱！” 伊人到家的时候，已经是十一点钟光景，房里火钵内的炭火早已消去了。午后五点钟的时候从海上吹来的一阵北风，把内房州一带的空气吹得冰冷，他写好了日记，正在改读的时候，忽然打了两个喷嚏。衣服也不换，他就和衣的睡了。 第二天醒来的时候，伊人觉得头痛得非常，鼻孔里吹出来的两条火热的鼻息，难受得很。房主人的女儿拿火来的时候，他问她要了一壶开水，他的喉音也变了。 “伊先生，你感冒了风寒了。身上热不热？” 伊人把检温计放到腋下去一测，体热高到了三十八度六分。他讲话也不愿意讲，只是沉沉的睡在那里。房主人来看了他两次。午后三点半钟的时候，C夫人也来看他的病了，他对她道一声谢，就不再说话了。晚上C夫人拿药来给他的时候，他听C 夫人说： “O也伤了风，体热高得很，大家正在那里替她忧愁。” 礼拜二的早晨，就是伊人伤风后的第二天，他觉得更加难受，看看体热已经增加到三十九度二分了，C夫人替他去叫了医生来一看，医生果然说： “怕要变成肺炎，还不如使他入病院的好。” 午后四点钟的时候在夕阳的残照里，有一乘寝台车，从北条的八幡海岸走上北条市的北条病院去。 这一天的晚上，北条病院的楼上朝南的二号室里，幽暗的电灯光的底下，坐着了一个五十岁前后的秃头的西洋人和C夫人在那里幽幽的谈议，病室里的空气紧迫得很。铁床上白色的被褥里，有一个清瘦的青年睡在那里。若把他那瘦得骨棱棱的脸上的两点被体热蒸烧出来的红影和口头的同微虫似的气息拿去了，我们定不能辨别他究竟是一个蜡人呢或是真正的肉体。这青年便是伊人。 一九二一年七月二十七日