Chapter 9 piece of pork liver

Half of Dazhonghua's body cavity has been trampled by the devil's feet, and Dazhonghua's head has been crushed by the devil's fist, leaving only the pitiful, brave and irregular heart still trembling.This atrium has the Yangtze River as its blood, and the three towns of Wuhan as its heart valves: every beat is related to the rise and fall of the nation, and every opening and closing trembles to convey the news of the continuation of history.It is the home of refugees and wounded soldiers, and it is also the starting point of the reorganization of the country.How many vehicles and boats have brought thousands of men and women who have lost their country and abandoned their homes. When they arrive here, they can't help but feel a little bit more courageous, and they have a little hope.Just looking at the rolling Yangtze River and the magnificence of the mountains and rivers is enough to make people swallow bitter tears, but there is no need to be pessimistic when thinking of the outstanding people in the land.

Snowflakes were flying on the river, and the gray-yellow river water supported primitive wooden boats and steel ships, flowing mighty and mightily to the east; as if filled with infinite indignation, it made depressed and uneven waves from time to time.A white gull follows a small boat, like a large piece of snow, undulating on the waves.There is a pair of handsome eyes on the Yellow Crane Tower, which is turning with the snow that is not easy to melt. A few days ago, Lin Lei came to Wuchang on a boat with more than 2,000 refugees from Xiajiang. It was difficult for him to admit that he was a refugee. He had knowledge, aspirations, and a future. of the common people.However, where did the knowledge, volunteers, and future go?He escapes, he squeezes, he is dirty, he is hungry, he has no ability or means, and he is no different from them.When he saw Wuhan, he faintly heard the cannonade and saw the flames of the previous few days.In the blink of an eye, both Jianghan Pass and Yellow Crane Tower were in the shadow of the flames, emitting black smoke soaring into the sky.In the blink of an eye, Hokage and smoke are gone; he is alone in a foreign land.He was wearing a thin suit, and his leather shoes were covered with mud of various colors, and he was carrying a ridiculously simple small bedroll alone.who?What are you doing?What's going on?he asked himself as he walked.Not refugees!He answered firmly himself.The hotel was hard to find, with many faces like iron, who said to him, "No room!" A black hole slightly larger than a kennel.Absolutely disrespectful, he slept on the wooden plank all night, not as vigilant as a dog.

After waking up, he took out the small mirror that had not been lost from his pocket, and he smiled.There is nothing left, but there is still this little mirror to look at himself.He has lost a lot of weight, but his nose and eyes are still so handsome, but his cheeks are sunken a lot, and two deep grooves appear at the corners of his mouth, which seem to be carved, with slight shadows.It's me, but it's not quite right—it's not a refugee after all! Putting down the small mirror, he decided to forget all the past.He was not an ordinary person before, and he cannot be a refugee now, and he must become a promising person tomorrow.This is consistent, and we must immediately plan for the future.

He crossed the river to see Hankou.The galloping of carriages and horses, the clamor of people, the unfamiliarity of the streets, and the coldness of his body made him unable to think or plan anything.He just felt lonely and depressed.I didn't meet a familiar face on the street, and I didn't hear a word of sympathy all day long. Holding all my past aspirations and glory, I have nowhere to complain to today.This place has no future.In any case, I would never join with refugees.Bought a newspaper, but saw nothing.He can't be a homeless person who doesn't beg for money in the crowd like this, he must find a quiet place and think carefully.Throwing away the newspaper, trying to buy a publication to take back to the hotel to read - the black hole is not a place to read, forget it; very crappy!However, each publication has its own position; I also have my own position; it doesn't matter if I don't read it.One's own position is the basis of all activities - personal and national.This, ordinary people will not have, so they are only qualified to be refugees, and they have nothing to do with themselves or the country.

On the Yellow Crane Tower, looking at Xingsheng in the three towns of Wuhan, the plans in his heart for himself and the ideas he usually held in his mind seemed to be too small. The scene in front of him forced him to forget himself, like that bird Like a white gull, I am just a small part of the landscape; if there is no Yangtze River, which flows through the ages and spreads across the vast expanse, everything would not exist; gulls and birds sail...not even history.The snowflakes flying on the cold river, the huge waves, the arrogance and coldness of Wuchang, the prosperity and compactness of Hankou, and the humility and beauty of Hanyang made him think of China, China's history, and China's great potential power.Even those foolish and ignorant fishermen seemed to be supporting something there, neither accidental nor useless, following the white gull.He felt an indescribable emotion, infinite and vague, which made his heart warm and his eyes slightly warm.

However, this is of no real use.He must think for himself; the vast Yangtze River and the vast scenery must take himself as the center, and if he has his own way, all talents will have a way.One's own opinion is the starting point of one's career and the key to turning the country from crisis to safety.Looking down along with one's own ideas and opinions, the broken country can be sorted out immediately, in order and in a logical manner.He let out a long breath.Scattered snowflakes are still falling on the river; the white gull has drifted away with the waves of the river. Yes, he knew his mind was moving forward.He should naturally take on the responsibility of saving the nation and preserving its existence.He saw a white light in his heart, longer than the Yangtze River, illuminating the whole of China, without any dross, not a single speck of dust, the whole thing was like a crystal, with green pine and bamboo and golden rivers printed inside.Don't budge, don't move!This white light must be shot out!He straightened out his chest, his twenty-five-year-old chest exhaled with great pride.

The snow stopped.Seeing the Yangtze River every day, strengthening myself every day, squeezing through the crowd every day, stepping on muddy shoes every day, and finding nothing to do every day.Lin Lei's aspirations are still great, and his proposition is still very firm, but there is no chance, no chance at all!He will be discouraged, but not happy either.Material enjoyment, due to money constraints, dare not try it; decided not to go to Hankou, lest seeing those enviable things will cause shortness of breath and sadness, ordinary labor and things, disdain to contribute; spiritual Comfort only relies on making up one's mind and never compromises.If there is an opportunity to get a big job done, you can not only show your arms, but also have material enjoyment, that would be great!It is not bad to be able to get what you want spiritually and suffer some physical pain; if you only suffer some pain in vain and have no ambitions, then it is better to be idle.Although it's uncomfortable to be idle, but in the end, I won't go with the refugees, begging for a bowl of food like a dog.

I bought some publications and took them to Snake Mountain to read when it was not raining.Every time he read a text, he tried his best to figure out, guess, and criticize.Every time he reads several articles, he divides them according to the criticism of each article: which article is the proposition of which party or faction, which article corresponds to which article, or is different from each other. .He is confident and unique, and he can see clearly the door and banner of the ideological struggle of the great era, so he considers himself a member of the fighters.This made him happy and proud; the soldiers who had just come out of the interior and the beggars in exile from all over the place in front of him were not worth looking at; he almost forgot how many thousands of regular troops and volunteers were fighting with the enemy in the ice and snow on the front line. He almost forgot that his hometown had been burnt to ashes by the enemy; on the contrary, he vaguely felt that he was sitting on the sofa in a bright and warm hall, smoking Three Fortress cigarettes, with some young and beautiful Men and women, discussing revolutionary theories and national salvation plans: the fragrance is warm, lively, comfortable and intense.He fantasizes that he has become the leader of the group of young people, guiding them to speak in a spirited manner, pondering their words, each word contains a strong fighting force, and a single word can overthrow the How many political enemies, sweeping away some incorrect concepts.Thinking of this, he couldn't help but think of many imaginary enemies. A certain person is a certain party, a certain person is a certain faction, and they should be defeated with the most vicious words.His eyes lit up.Standing up, he tugged at the lapel of his suit vigorously, straightened his chest, and looked around.The whole city is in his eyes, and he feels that there may be many political bandits and enemies hidden on the left and right of the mountain; the smoke on the roof seems to be some ghosts, and it must be cleared away immediately.

Standing in front of Baobingtang or on the back of Snake Mountain like this, he vaguely thought that his heroic appearance was worthy of engraving a full-body bronze statue, standing on the mountain, and being immortal—a revolutionary martyr.However, every time he returned to the small hotel, his heat would sink, and all the theories, propositions, and positions could not brighten the black hole a little bit.He seemed to have suddenly fallen from heaven to hell.Only then did he feel extremely embarrassed that he did not have the strength to overcome any difficulties, and that what really forced him to come here to suffer was Japan, not some phantom imaginary enemy.Only then did he recall the feeling and stimulation he had received at the top of the Yellow Crane Tower; it seemed the best way to unite the power of the whole of China to fight Japan; the internal friction was just mischief.He thought of this, but he couldn't believe it, because actually going to war and sacrifice seemed too far away from him; if he tried so hard, he would be a bit like a dog picking a mouse, meddling in his own business.He was born in an era of party struggle, and his knowledge and aspirations came from struggle and vanity on paper.His suit is only suitable for sitting in a room with heating pipes. He can't understand what is meant by "battlefield" and what is meant by "bleeding".He has the term "people" in his heart, but he must never have a word with the people who spit on the ground.

He wanted to write some articles with peace of mind and submit them to publications that were consistent with his views. Each article, he decided, must be an attack or question on some text he had read.Splitting other people's articles, he did not hesitate to take a sentence or two out of context to criticize desperately, in order to break through a little bit and cause the entire enemy army to collapse.On the one hand, he dismantled other people's articles in this way, and on the other hand, he calculated his own writing style; it took a lot of work, but it was not easy to put together an article.He was a little anxious, but he decided not to be discouraged; the more difficult the delivery, the more he could see the conscience of literature and art.

He sometimes walked for miles in the streets to think over a word.All the people and things on the street are like fog, which is only enough to obscure his sight, but has nothing to do with him at all.Just as he was walking frightened and wandering like this, from a distance he saw a familiar figure from the back, with neat hair covering the collar, a long and straight neck, shoulders slightly hugged in, but the back was not stretched forward. She has a beautiful slender waist, and the back of a short blue coat dangles around her knees, revealing her long and bulging calves underneath.The back figure is all gentle, neat, natural, and pure; Lin Lei suddenly forgot everything he was thinking about, and matched it with a long and handsome face, with two watery eyes, he could never stop His expression is either slightly angry or slightly smiling; the small nose and tight mouth are always light, cute and majestic.He wished he could catch up with him one step at a time, to prove that the face was exactly as he remembered it.And there are some expressions that he has never seen but can be imagined: surprise, kindness, slightly wet eyes, trembling lips, revealing some smooth and beautiful teeth, speechless for a while... That back view is unmistakable, that piece The blue short coat was unmistakable; he had only to, must, catch up, and the face was unmistakable, and it must give him infinite comfort and sympathy.How lonely and miserable he was! But his feet couldn't move forward briskly.Next to the back is another back: like a character in a freehand painting, the uncapped head is just a not very round circle, and a bloated gray cotton coat is casually draped underneath.Lin Lei couldn't think of the most appropriate image of this back at the moment, he just thought it was a cloth bag, or an unbound bedroll, leaning against her, it was her fatal burden.She was actually very close to this cloth bag, walking forward slowly!He couldn't catch up, and couldn't make Budai share her sympathy and beauty with him.He imagined that if his face could be turned upside down and she saw him, she would definitely abandon the luggage with legs and run towards him.As this was never going to happen, his pain gradually became contemptuous and cruel: she was not so pure and beautiful as he imagined.Maybe, maybe she became a prostitute because of her escape!No, she must not be a whore!He regrets it.Even if it's a whore, he has to go find her and pull her out of hell.He was graduating from college, and she had just finished her sophomore homework... Looking at those two backgrounds, he thought of the sweet realm of the past.The two years of classmates, how many times of contact, the innumerable small intimacies——accumulated a heart history that will never be erased.Is everything about her fake?Why leaning shoulder to shoulder with a wounded soldier?Follow her and see where she goes! On the road came a group of female soldiers.With just one look, how many pure faces, righteous eyes, unseemly uniforms, and short legs that are trying to move forward can be seen in him.She—he hastily put his eyes on that figure again—is she also a female soldier?He quickened his pace and almost caught up with her. She and the wounded soldier entered a dilapidated temple. When they went up the steps, she held the wounded soldier's left arm; the right arm was missing, no wonder it looked like some unbound luggage roll. Woolen cloth.There is a wooden sign hanging on the door stack of the ruined temple - ×××× Hospital for Wounded Soldiers. Lin Lei couldn't sleep well all night.Those two figures from the back seem to be more difficult to analyze than anything else. Without a detailed analysis, it is extremely difficult to come to a conclusion.In his mind, it is easy to come up with the great plan of saving the nation; as long as he has a certain standpoint and clear thinking, he will have good speeches and articles; everyone will follow the instructions in the articles, and things are simple.Those two back figures are extremely difficult to guess.He tried his best to think positively: what's the point of her giving up her life as a young lady to join the army and become a nurse?Tens of thousands of professional soldiers have been defeated; what good is it to add half an extra female soldier or nurse?Women are really simple animals! Early in the morning, he stood in front of the ruined temple, not daring to go in, nor could he think of a way to see her.He just felt dizzy.There was a thin cloud in the sky, there were not many pedestrians on the street, and the breeze was very cool. He shrugged his shoulders and looked at the two broken temple doors intentionally or unintentionally. There were footsteps in the door, and he hurriedly dodged.A soldier with a broadsword on his back opened the temple door, and stood in front of the wooden sign with his eyes fixed, as if he had no thought or expression, and was just waiting to get angry and fight at someone.No matter what, Lin Lei couldn't mix her—if she really worked here—with people who were as simple as a piece of wood.Some pieces of dry wood, and a flower; how can a daughter with revolutionary ideas live in the same place with a group of big men who are good at fighting? He started to walk back, putting his hands in his trouser pockets, looking down at the white gas coming out of his nose.His right shoulder suddenly sank, and the long and handsome face was only half a foot away from him, but her eyes were not wet, and her lips were not trembling; All the support is lively and generous, very real, and ethereal, as if not to drive some deep meaning into his personal heart, but to rejoice for something broader and broad. "Lei, how did you come here?" Lei couldn't answer a word.Her face was rougher than before, her hair hadn't been permed for a long time, and her expression was quite different from before; he had to think about it before he could definitely admit that she was indeed the old concubine.Thinking about it this way, there is some alienation and pain hidden inside. "Lei, what's wrong with you? Why are you in a daze?" Guang Gui caught up with his pace and leaned on his shoulder. He remembered the cloth bag. "How is the family?" She looked at his face. Lei inserted his hand deeper. Guang GUI lowered his head: "My family is all ruined! My parents escaped because they escaped, so far there is no letter!" "But you are very happy?" Lei's lips trembled, he pulled out one of his hands, and wiped his nose. "I'm very happy!" She frowned. "When I was fleeing, my parents were separated and I had no money. I only felt poor and weak, like a fallen leaf in a storm. Later, when I met a group of wounded soldiers and soldiers, Some of them have broken arms, some have limped legs, some cannot bleed, and some are in unbearable pain. They still want to live, and they want to recover from their illness before going to the battlefield. They are simple, really simple, they only have one life, Only one mind lost my life on the battlefield! I have nothing left, but I still have this life. This life, I thought, must be put in one mind; I have to do something. I just follow them came here; and became their sisters." "Who are they fighting for? They don't know." Lei opened the floodgates to the full of complaints: "They were injured, they died; why? I don't know; when you go to rescue them, what stand do you stand on, what overall plan do you have? Ugh , can you turn defeat into victory by wrapping the arms of one or two wounded soldiers?" Guanggui smiled. "I don't have any position or plan. I just want to sell my personal strength. If I save a soldier, I can save a little more combat power. My parents can die, my family property can be lost, and my standpoint can be put aside. I want to do what I can do right away. I have only one ideal left, which is that everyone contributes, and the country will never perish. The country is my parents, and everyone is my brothers and sisters. Whether it is the First Army or the Seventh Route Army, anyone who bleeds for the country is Heroes; whoever pays attention to the lineage of the army and puts some weight on it is a fool." "It's exactly the same as the fools of the YMCA and the Red Cross." Lei's laughter was high and cold: "The kindness of a woman!" "Yes, I will never let go of the kindness of this woman." She didn't smile, and she didn't get angry: "I believe that I am not empty now, because I have a close relationship with the wounded soldiers: I saw the important country. The fact is that I don’t want to die, so my flesh and blood must be cast in the tide of battle. If the soldiers want my body in addition to my care and labor, I will never begrudge it; my flesh is no nobler than theirs. However, They all respect me; I spend a dime in my pocket for them, and they give me a few peanuts for a penny. Here, I understand what is pure and what is enthusiasm.” "You don't even read newspapers?" Lei asked maliciously. "Not only to read, but also to explain in detail by me: During the explanation, they told me many military achievements, names of people, places, scenery, and products. What they don't understand are those new terms. What I don't understand are Chinese people, places, etc. They are the real Chinese; they were born in China, died for China, and understand Chinese affairs. We," Guang Gui smiled again, "we only care about translating foreign books, but we don't know anything about Chinese affairs. What kind of party, we also followed, but we don’t know that it’s a daytime haunting!” She suddenly stopped, “Yo! Passed by.” “Passed by what?” "The butcher shop! I'm going out to buy pork liver for 20 cents for Platoon Leader Liu." She turned her head and walked back, took two steps, and then turned back. "He's bleeding too much, and there's no preferential food in the hospital; so I have to buy him some pork liver. Do you have any money? Here's my last twenty cents!" Lin Lei took out a one-dollar bill.She took it, laughed, danced, and went into a small butcher's shop.The thin clouds in the sky split a long slit, and some sunlight came out.He also saw his own shadow lying on the ground slender. "Women have no ideals," he said softly to himself: "The worst child is also a mother's baby! Whoever sends her a bouquet of flowers is a lover; until now, whoever bleeds is a hero." !" He wanted to tell her this unceremoniously and teach her to think about it. She jumped out of the small butcher shop nimbly, holding a piece of purple liver in her hand.Her eyes were fixed on her liver, and there was a little smile on the corner of her mouth, as if she was looking at the face of the cutest child. He hurried away.The sun was covered by clouds again.From time to time, a piece of purple-red pig's liver appeared in front of his eyes - there were people and things on one side of the pig's liver; there was nothing on the other side of the pig's liver; it seemed like two small worlds, one alive and the other dead.