Chapter 23 Chapter 22 Son, I Hope You Are Strong

I have returned to my mother-in-law's home.But it's like a hotel for me, I just go back to sleep every day. It's not that I don't love this place, but that it's not mine after all. I've tried to make it mine too, but it just didn't work out. Should the stool be placed on the east side or on the west side?I have no say. Only my son can inspire my enthusiasm to come back here. In the afternoon, I received a call from Zhou Yuan, saying that her uncle had passed away, and she and her parents were going to the funeral, and asked me to pick up my son and hold a parent-teacher meeting by the way.

My son is in the middle class of the kindergarten. I used to hold parent-teacher meetings. If I could not go, I always refused to go. Zhou Yuan would go, or my son's grandparents would do it for me. I don't like to appear in front of the public, and I don't like to appear in front of acquaintances. Probably the more poorly a person is, the more he likes to wrap himself tightly. I always think that any party is for people who get along well, and the parent meeting is the same. I admit that my psychology is very dark, but I can't get out. I often look forward to the day when I can be the center of the party dressed in smart clothes, but every time I curl up in the corner of the party, licking the wound of my own loss.

I also try to be more gracious, but years of suffocating have shaped me into a humble character. Therefore, this parent meeting, I am still silent. The teacher suggested that parents pay attention to the cultivation of their children's specialties, and launched extracurricular remedial classes such as painting, English, abacus and mental arithmetic. To be honest, I am not very supportive of this kind of extracurricular tutoring.The child, it is better to let him grow naturally, too much training will only backfire, and nothing will be achieved in the end. But there are many parents who want their children to develop according to their own thinking, and hope to carve their children into their ideal works, perfect.

Therefore, under the guidance of teachers, many parents enroll their children in extracurricular remedial classes.One of our downstairs parents, my neighbor, enrolled his daughter in three courses in one go. I did not report.The kindergarten teacher looked at me strangely, and said insinuatingly: "I hope parents will think more about the healthy development of their children in the future. If you don't learn much when you are young, you will not learn anything well when you grow up." I don't quite agree with the teacher's point of view.In my opinion, children in kindergarten should learn rules, learn to be human, and hone their character, instead of learning skills.

Forgive me for summarizing all tutoring as technology. We can teach children a lot of technology today, but are you proficient in these technologies?If you are not proficient yourself, how can you teach your children well?Will he be able to use it later?Wouldn't it be a waste of your child's energy if you don't use it?Is it what he wants?If the child doesn't like it, is it good to force the child to learn? Therefore, I am not very interested in all kinds of extracurricular tutoring in the name of developing children's intelligence and clamoring "don't lose at the starting line".

Except for me, other parents have enrolled their children in one or more courses. Seeing that I really didn't intend to sign up, the kindergarten teacher began to ask me directly: "Which class do you plan to enroll your child in?" I smiled and said, "I haven't thought about it yet, why don't I discuss it with my son?" My neighbor came over and said, "What does the child know, just give him a class." Damn, are you buying a toy? Seeing that I didn't report, the other parents gathered around, chattering and urging me to sign up for their son. If I didn't report, it would be like I was abusing my son.

Some female parents who are grumpy and even love to complain, even complained next to them: "What kind of parents don't even raise their own children, what are they doing to earn money?" I blushed.I want to explain to everyone the reason why I don't enroll my child, but this will inevitably demolish the teacher. When I was embarrassed, I heard my neighbor whisper to the teacher: "I heard that his financial conditions are not very good, so it's fine if you don't report it." This word spread like a plague, and the parents immediately adjusted the atmosphere, from incomprehension to sympathy, even pity, and kept saying something to enlighten me.

I would rather be blamed by everyone than listen to words of sympathy. These are two different types of pain. The former is an equal opposite, and the latter shows that you are a typical weak person. The teacher began to smooth things over, saying, "It's okay if you don't report it, it's voluntary. Don't hang around here, the parent-teacher meeting is over, you can leave." I said: "Teacher, I want to enroll my son in two subjects, abacus and mental arithmetic and English." There was another burst of surprise, chirping, chirping. I took my son's little hand and walked on the road with heavy and sad steps.

My son still doesn't know what poverty is, he is still young.In less than two years, when he is a little older, he will know how to compare. What other people's father does, how much money he has, and what kind of car he drives, he will compare it with me in his heart, and then he will be disappointed in me, and then he will feel inferior. Maybe it will be self-closing because of it. What I have to do is to let the children understand as early as possible that it is good to have money, but sometimes you have to accept the reality of not having money. But for kids, it's an esoteric topic.

I asked my son, "Son, what do you want to be when you grow up?" I reported abacus and mental arithmetic and English to him, and I hope my son's answer can have something to do with these two things. I despise myself for this kind of thinking in my heart-I am too practical. The son thought for a while and said, "I want to be as tall as my father." The text is off topic, fuck it. Ask again, the son said: "I want to go to the zoo with my father." There was something strange in my heart.I have never been to the zoo with my son. there has never been. Because I was living poorly, I always wanted to change my situation, so I only saw and thought of myself, but ignored my dearest son.Even going to the zoo once became his wish.

In winter, it got dark earlier, and it was getting dark when I was walking on the road. I decided to take my son to the zoo right away. I can't wait.Sitting on the bus to the zoo, making out with my son, but hating the bus driving so slowly. When we arrived at the zoo, it was already dark, and the people at the ticket office were off work, so my son and I had to look inside through the big iron gate. I pointed to a large area of ​​night in the iron gate, and told my son, where is the tiger, where is the peacock, and where is his favorite giraffe. In fact, I have never been to a zoo in C city for so long. My son opened his eyes wide and followed my fingers, as if he really saw it.Looking at my son's expression, I feel like I'm a liar.I just want to complete the task of accompanying my son to the zoo and seek some psychological comfort.In fact, the son saw nothing. I said to my son, "Dad will come with you again on Sunday, and let you see enough." The son nodded happily, running non-stop in the square outside the zoo. At night, my son slept very soundly next to me, with slight sweat on the tip of his tender nose.I wiped him gently with a paper towel, which probably alarmed him.He turned over and fell asleep again.Carefree age, happy like a flower. I hope that my son will not grow up, as he is now, without having to experience the hardships of life and the dangers of society, without comparison, or even with struggle. But he has to grow up eventually, and finally has to bear the pressure that society brings to him.If he is strong, he will overcome the pressure and get the position he deserves; if he is weak, maybe, he will live like me. I don't want him to make the same mistakes as me.I hope, I hope he is a strong man, I hope he is good in everything.