Chapter 10 chapter Ten

It was ten o'clock the next morning when John came downstairs.Breakfast was at the table, and Gerda had already eaten it in bed, and was quite disturbed by it, because she felt that perhaps she was "causing trouble to others." Nonsense, John said.People like the Angkatells who still manage to keep housekeepers and servants, we have reason to give them something to do. He felt that he had been very gentle with Gerda this morning.All the anger that had been making him restless and nervous lately seemed to have subsided and disappeared. Sir Henry and Edward had gone out to shoot, Lady Angcartel told him.She herself was busy with a garden basket and a pair of willing gloves.He stayed there talking to her for a while until Gjayn approached him with a letter on a tray.

"It has just been delivered by hand, sir." He raised his eyebrows slightly and took it over. It's Veronica! He strolled into the study and opened it. "Please come over this morning. I must see you. Veronica". As bossy as ever.He really didn't want to go.Then he thought, he should go and get this over with.He set off immediately. He took the path opposite the study window, past the swimming pool.The swimming pool was a center from which many paths radiated in all directions: one leading up the hill to the woods; .A few yards further down the country road is the cottage called The Dovecote.

Veronica was waiting for him.From the windows of the white half-timbered building she called out: "Come in, John. It's cold this morning." A fire is lit in the living room, which is furnished throughout in beige, with cushions in a pale primrose pattern. He had looked at her critically this morning, seeing something different from the girl he remembered than he had been able to see last night. Strictly speaking, she is even prettier now than she was then.She also has a better understanding of her own beauty, and cherishes and improves it in various ways.Her hair, once blond, was now silvery white.Her eyebrows are also different than before, adding more maturity to her expression.

She was never the empty-headed beauty.He remembered that Veronica had been described as one of our "wise actresses."She has a university degree and has her own opinions on Strindberg and Shakespeare. He understood now something that had seemed vague to him in the past—she was a woman who had defined herself to the point of being unnatural.Veronica was used to having her own way, and beneath the soft and beautiful outline of her flesh he seemed to sense an ugly firm determination. "I'll send you that note," Veronica said when she handed him a pack of cigarettes, "because we have to talk. We have to make arrangements. For our future, I mean .”

He took a cigarette and lit it.Then he said very kindly: "But do we have a future?" She gave him a stern look. "What do you mean, John? Of course we have a future. We've wasted fifteen years of our time and there's no need to waste any more." He sat down. "I'm sorry, Veronica. But I'm afraid you've misunderstood everything. I was very happy to see you again. But your life and mine are not in touch anywhere. They are quite different." "Nonsense, John. I love you and you love me. We've always loved each other. You were unbelievably stubborn! But it doesn't matter now. Our lives don't collide anymore, and I don't mean going back to America. When After finishing the film I'm working on, I'm going to do a play on the London stage. I have a wonderful script - Elderton wrote it just for me. It's going to be a huge success. "

"I sure will," he said politely. "And you can go on being a doctor," she said, her voice kind and condescending. "You're very famous, they tell me." "My dear girl, I am married and have children." "I was married myself at the time," said Veronica, "but all these things were easy to arrange, and a good lawyer could get things done." She smiled at him charmingly, "I've always been Want to marry you, darling. I don't understand why I have such strong feelings for you, but I do!" "I'm sorry, Veronica, but there aren't going to be good lawyers to settle anything, and your and my lives have nothing to do with each other."

"Irrelevant after last night?" "You're not a child anymore, Veronica. You've had several husbands, and the papers say you've had many lovers. What did last night actually mean? Nothing, and you understand that." "Oh, my dear John." She was still smiling. "If you ever saw your own face--in that stuffy drawing room! You must be back in San Miguel again." John sighed.He said: "I was back in San Miguel. But try to understand, Veronica. You came out of the past and came to me. Last night, I, too, was in love with the past, but today —Today is totally different. I am a man fifteen years older than I used to be, a man you don't even know--and I'm sure you wouldn't like him if you did know .”

"Do you prefer your wife and children?" She was genuinely surprised. "You might think it's weird, but it's true." "Nonsense, John, you love me." "Sorry, Veronica." She said in disbelief: "Don't you love me?" "We'd better get these things out of the way. You're an unusually beautiful woman, Veronica, but I don't love you." She stood there quietly, like a wax figure.This silence of hers made him a little uncomfortable. When she spoke again, the vicious tone shocked him. "Who is she?"

"Her? Who are you referring to!" "The woman at the mantelpiece last night?" Henrietta!he thinks.How on earth did she recognize Henrietta?He said aloud: "Who are you talking about? Mitch Hardcastle?" "Mitch? That's a square-faced, brown-and-black girl, isn't it? No, I don't mean her. And I don't mean your wife. I mean the haughty one leaning against the mantelpiece." The devil! It was because of her that you rejected me! Oh, don't pretend to be moral to your wife and children, it's that woman." She stood up and walked towards him.

"Don't you understand, John, that I've been thinking of you since I came back to England eighteen months ago? Why should I come here and buy a stupid house? Just because I see you come here on weekends and The Angkatells stay together!" "So everything was planned last night, Veronica?" "You belong to me, John. You always belong to me!" "I belong to no one, Veronica. Hasn't life taught you by now? You can't own other people's body and soul! I loved you when I was a young man, and I wanted you to come with me Sharing my life. You didn't!"

"My life and career is much more important than yours. Anyone can be a doctor!" He's getting a little angry. "Are you as good as you think you are?" "You mean, I haven't reached the pinnacle of my career yet. I will! I will!" John Crystal looked at her with a sudden, very calm interest. "I don't think you would, you know. There's one thing you lack, Veronica. All you have is grab and grab—no real generosity—and that's what I think you lack." Veronica stood up.She said in a calm voice: "You rejected me for fifteen years. Today you rejected me again, and I want you to apologize for that." John stood up and walked to the door. "I'm sorry, Veronica, if I hurt you. You are very sweet, my dear, and I loved you very much. Can't we just let it go?" "Goodbye, John. We won't let it go. I think I hate you more than I hate anyone." He shrugged. "sorry, see you again." John walked slowly back through the woods.Went to the pool, where he sat on a bench.He didn't regret his attitude towards Veronica at all.Veronica, he thought calmly, she was a rather dirty work of art.She's always been a pretty filthy craft, and one of the best things he's ever done is clear her out just in time.God only knows what would have happened to him by now if he hadn't! And it was not being bound by the past that gave him that sense of beginning a new life.Those old entanglements of the past year or two had made life extremely difficult for him.Poor Gerda, who has been pleasing him with her unselfish and constant enthusiasm.He will treat her better in the future. He wouldn't try to say anything aggressive about Henrietta now—she wouldn't be treated that way again.The storm stopped above her head, and she sat there, contemplative, her eyes watching you from afar. He thought: "I'll go and tell Henrietta." Startled by some small, unexpected sound, he looked up warily.There were gunshots in the woods, and in the woods, the cry of birds, and the usual small sound of the slight melancholy falling of leaves.But it was a different kind of sound - a very faint, quick clicking sound. Suddenly, John was keenly aware of the danger.How long has he been sitting there?half an hour?Still an hour?Someone is watching him. The rattling was—of course it was— He turned around abruptly, and a man was already standing behind him.His eyes widened in surprise, but he didn't have time to cry out. The shot rang out and he fell, awkwardly, sprawled on the edge of the pool.A dark smudge gushed from the left side of his body and slowly dripped down the edge of the pool, red blood flowing into the blue water.