Chapter 12 Chapter Ten Schweik Became the Priest's Herald

{{1}} Two soldiers held bayonet-mounted guns, and Schweik, escorted by their honor, resumed his adventure.They are sending him to the priest. Due to their physical characteristics, the two escort soldiers just complement each other: one is long and thin, and the other is short and fat.The slender man was lame in his right foot, and the stout warrior had a weak left foot.Both of them were members of the militia, and they were completely exempted from military service before the war. They walked sullenly along the pavement, and from time to time stole glances at Schweik, who was walking among them and bowing to everyone.His civilian clothes and the military cap he had worn when he went to enlist were lost in the storage room of the internment camp, but they gave him an old uniform before releasing him.The original owner of this suit had a belly as big as a pot and was a head taller than Schweik.The trouser legs were fat enough to hold three Schweiks, and the waist of the trousers was higher than his chest. The whole body was full of checks, which attracted the attention of everyone in the street.The military cap, also exchanged from the internment camp, just covered his ears.

People walking in the street smiled at Schweik, who responded with his own sweet smile and kindly, good-natured eyes. In this way, they walked towards Carlin, where the priest lived. They walked across Charles Bridge in silence.As they were passing Charles Street, the dumpy man said to Schweik: "Do you know why we took you to the priest?" "To repent," Schweik answered casually. "Tomorrow they're going to hang me. It's the usual thing. They call it consolation." "Why did they want you...?" asked the thin man cautiously, while the fat man looked at Schweik with pity.

"I don't know," replied Schweik with a pleasant smile on his face. "I don't understand anything. I guess it's fate!" "You're not a National Socialist, are you?" the dumpy man began to speak cautiously.He thought it best to speak up. "It's none of our business anyway. Look, there's a lot of people around here staring at us. The bayonet must have caught their attention. Maybe we'll try to pull it out somewhere where no one's seeing it. Don't you slip." Wow! If you did slip, it would embarrass us to death. Don't you, Tunick?" With that, he turned to look at the thin man.The thin man said in a low voice, "Yes, we can take out the bayonet as well. After all, he is one of us."

He was no longer suspicious of Schweik, and his heart was filled with pity for him.So they found a convenient corner and pulled out the bayonet.At this time, the fat man asked Schweik to walk beside him. "You must want a cigarette, don't you? I mean, if..." He was on the point of saying, "If they let you have a cigarette before you hang," but he didn't finish the sentence, feeling that the situation , then I am afraid it is not very appropriate to say. They all smoked a cigarette.Those who escorted Schweik began to talk to him about their wives and children, about their five acres of land and a ox.

"I'm thirsty," said Schweik. The thin man and the fat man looked at each other. "Maybe we'll order a quick drink somewhere," said the fat man, who intuitively knew the thin man would agree. "But you have to find an inconspicuous place." "Let's go to the Violet Tavern!" suggested Schweik. "You can throw what you have in the kitchen. There are still people playing the violin and the harmonica," Schweik went on. "People who go to drink aren't bad either—whores and people who don't want to go to really rich places."

The thin man and the fat man looked at each other again, and then the thin man said, "Then let's go there right away. It's a long way to Carlin!" On the way, Schweik told them some interesting stories.They were all in high spirits when they reached the Violet Tavern.Once inside, they did as Schweik suggested.They put the rifles in the kitchen and went into the bar.There, a violin and harmonica were playing a popular tune. Near the door, a soldier was sitting among a group of ordinary people, talking about his injuries in Serbia.His arms were bandaged and his pockets were full of cigarettes they had given him.He said he couldn't drink any more, and a bald old man in the crowd kept persuading him: "Bring me another drink, boy, who knows when we'll see each other again! I'll ask them to play it for you." How about a tune? Do you like 'Orphan'?"

This is the favorite tune of the bald old man.Then, the harmonica and the violin played that sad tune together.The old man wept and joined the chorus with a trembling voice. Someone at the table over there said, "Hey, can't you just put that tune away? Get the hell out of here with your nasty orphans!" Schweik and his escort watched all this with interest.Schweik recalled how he used to take care of the place before the war, but his escorts had no such recollection; it was something new to them, and they all began to love the tavern.The first one to drink and play was the fat dumpling.The tall and thin man was not willing to give up.

"I'm going to have a dance with it," he said when he finished his fifth drink and saw couples polka-dancing. Schweik drank continuously, and the tall, thin man brought his partner to the table when he finished dancing.They sang and danced and drank without stopping.In the afternoon a soldier came up and said that for five crowns he would give them blood poisoning.He said he carried a syringe with him, and he could inject gasoline into their legs or hands, enough to keep them lying down for at least two months. If they kept spitting on their wounds, they could even lie in bed for six months, possibly avoiding military service altogether.

When it was getting dark, Schweik suggested that they continue on the road to find the priest.At this moment the fat little man began to slur his words, and advised Schweik to stay a little longer.The tall, thin man also said that the priest could wait as long as he wanted.But Schweik has lost interest in the Violet Tavern.He threatened that if they did not go, he would go on his own way. That's how they set off.But he had to promise them another place to rest on the way.So they went into a little café again, where the fat man sold his silver watch so they could go on drinking.After going out, Shuai Ke walked by the arms of the two men.This caused him a lot of trouble.They kept falling down on their feet, and they kept expressing their desire to drink it again.

The fat little man almost lost the letter to the priest, and Schweik had to keep it in his hand.He also had to be careful everywhere so that the officers and non-commissioned officers wouldn't see him.After a lot of trouble, he led them safely to the priest's house. On the second floor, a business card that read "Military Priest Otto Katz" told them that this was the place where the priest lived. A soldier opened the door, and loud voices and clinking glasses could be heard inside. "We—Report—Sir—Officer—" said the tall, thin man with difficulty in German, saluting the soldier who opened the door. "We - bring - a letter - and a person."

"Come in," said the soldier. "Where did you get so drunk? The priest happened to be a little drunk too," spat the soldier, and took the letter away. They waited in the aisle for a long time.At last the door opened, and the priest entered hastily.He was wearing a shirt with a cigar between his fingers. "So you've already arrived," he said to Schweik. "This is the man who brought you here. Hello, do you have any matches?" "Report sir, I have not." "Oh, why not? Every soldier should have a match with him. A soldier without a match is—what is he?" "Sir, he's a man without matches," replied Schweik. "Well said. A man without matches can't light someone's fire. Well, here's one. Number two on the order. Do your feet stink, Schweik?" "Report sir, it doesn't stink." "That's enough. Number three, will you drink the brandy?" "Report sir, I don't drink brandy, I only drink rum." "Okay. Look at that guy. I borrowed him from Lieutenant Fieldhuber for today's service. It's his horse-bend. He doesn't drink a drop of alcohol.He's a so-so-alcoholist, that's why he was sent to the military.Because—because I don't want someone like him. " At this moment the priest turned his attention to the escort of Schweik.The two soldiers tried desperately to stand up straight, but their feet were always wobbling, and they couldn't rely on their rifles for support. "You—you are drunk—drunk," said the priest. "You were drunk on your business trip, and now you're going to be punished, and I won't let you go. Shuik, hand over their rifles. Tell them to march to the kitchen and watch them with their guns until the patrols come and take them out." They're taking it away. I'll tel- tel-call right up to the barracks." In this way, Napoleon's famous saying that "the situation of the war changes rapidly" came true again.Those two soldiers had escorted Schweik that morning with bayonet-tipped guns in case he escaped, and then led him on his way; now Schweik took charge of them with guns. They only began to notice the change when they sat in the kitchen and saw Schweik standing in the doorway with his bayonet raised. The tall, thin man stood up and staggered towards the door. "Man, let's go back," he said to Schweik. "Stop being a fool." "You go? I have to watch you," Schweik said. "I can't talk to you now." Suddenly the priest appeared at the door. "The barracks phone doesn't work. So you better go back! But remember--remember, you're not allowed to drink--drink while you're on duty. Run!" To do justice to the priest, we should add here that he didn't call the barracks, because he didn't have a telephone there.He just babbled to the lamp holder. {{2}} Schweik has been the priest's orderly for three full days.During this period he saw the priest only once.On the third day, an orderly from Lieutenant Helmitch called Schweik to fetch the priest. On the way, the orderly told Schweik that the priest had a quarrel with the lieutenant, broke the piano, and was so drunk that he refused to go home. Lieutenant Helmich was also drunk and drove the priest to the In the passage, the priest fell asleep on the spot by the door.Schweik arrived at the scene and shook the priest awake.The priest opened his eyes and muttered a little.Schweik saluted and said, "Sir, I'm coming." "What are you doing here?" "Report sir, I'm here to pick you up." "Ugh, so you're here to pick me up? Where are we going?" "Sir, go back to your house." "What am I going home for? Am I not at home?" "Report sir, you are lying on the floor of someone else's house." "But—how did I—get here?" "Report sir, you are here to visit." "No-no-not a visit, you-you're wrong about that." Schweik lifted the priest up and stood him up against the wall.When Schweik supported him, the priest staggered, leaned against him, and said: "You made me fall!" Then, with a smirk, he added: "You made me fall!" Schweik finally pushed the priest up against the wall.He dozed off again in this new position. Schweik woke him up. "What are you doing?" The priest tried in vain to sit up against the wall and rubbed forward. "Who the hell are you?" "Report sir," replied Schweik, pushing the priest back against the wall. "I am your horse." "I don't have a horse," said the priest with difficulty, and this time he wanted to fall on Schweik.The two struggled for a while, but in the end Schweik completely won.He took advantage of the situation and dragged the priest downstairs.In the hall, the priest tried desperately not to let Schweik drag him into the street. "I don't know you," he said to Schweik, pestering him. "Do you know Otto Katz? That's me." "I have been to the Archbishop's mansion," he cried, holding the hall door firmly. "The Pope takes me very seriously, do you understand that?" Schweik agreed, and at the same time he spoke rudely to the priest. "I told you to go away," he said, "or I'll beat you up. We're going home now, and you shut up!" The priest let go of the door, but caught Schweik again.Schweik pushed him away, then dragged him into the street and dragged him along the sidewalk in the direction home. "Who is that fellow to you?" asked one of the onlookers in the street. "It's my brother," Schweik replied. "He came home from vacation and was so drunk when he saw me because he thought I was dead." The priest understood the last few words, stood up straight, and said to the passers-by: "If any of you die, you must report to the police station within three days, so that I can bless your corpse." Then he fell silent again, trying to hit the pavement.Schweik helped him to pull him back, the priest's head drooped forward, his feet trailed behind him, and he dangled like a bowed cat.Along the way, he was still muttering: "Dominus vobiscum-et cum spiritu tuo. Dominus vobiscum..." (3) When he came to the place where the carriage was hired, Schweik helped the priest to sit against the wall, and then he came to bargain with the coachmen. After talking for a long time, a coachman agreed to take them. Schweik turned around and found that the priest had fallen asleep.Someone took off his bowler hat (for he always wore civilian clothes for his walks) and took it away. Schweik woke him up, and the coachman helped him carry the priest into the carriage.The abbe entered the carriage almost completely unconscious.He took Schweik for Colonel Just of the Seventy-fifth Infantry Regiment.He kept muttering: "Sir, please hold your hand high, I know I'm a ruffian." After a while, it seemed that the collision between the carriage and the sidewalk woke him up.He sat up straight and began to sing a few lines that no one understood, but then he fell unconscious again.He turned his head and winked at Schweik, and asked: "My dear madam, how are you today?" After resting for a while, he said, "Where are you going to escape the summer heat this year?" He was evidently bewildered by what he saw, for he then said: "Oh, so you have such a big son!" he said, pointing to Schweik. "Sit down," cried Schweik.The priest was about to climb up on the seat. "Otherwise I'll teach you some rules. I mean what I say." The priest immediately fell silent.He stared out of the window with pig-like eyes, marveling at everything around him.Then, with his hands on his cheeks, he sang sadly: It seems that I am the only one who loves no one. But he stopped immediately and wanted to light up the cigarette holder. "It won't strike," he said wistfully, after he had struck out the matches. "It's all you, I click once and you blow once!" But he immediately couldn't catch the ballast again.He started laughing. "I've lost my ticket," he cried. "Stop the tram, I have to find my ticket." Then he made a resigned gesture and said, "Well, then, let's drive down!" Then he babbled again: "In most cases... yes, you can... in any case... you're wrong... the second floor... that's just an excuse... dear lady, that's Your business has nothing to do with me...please open the account...I drank a cup of black coffee." In this sleepy state, he began to quarrel with an imaginary rival who had fought him for a window seat in a restaurant.Then, using the carriage as a train again, he leaned out and shouted in Czech and German: "Ninberg is here, change trains." Schweik then dragged him back.The priest again forgot about the train ride and began to imitate the sounds of the farm.He made the longest sound when he crowed like a rooster.His trumpet-like voice from the carriage was clear and loud.For a while, he was so active that he couldn't rest for a moment, and he wanted to jump out of the carriage, and cursed the passers-by who passed by the carriage.After that, he threw his handkerchief out of the cab again, and called the coachman to stop, because his luggage had been lost. Along the way, Schweik dealt with the priest mercilessly.Whenever he resorted to all sorts of ridiculous attempts to jump out of the carriage, or smash the seats, etc., Schweik hit him in the ribs several times.The abbe had grown indifferent to this treatment. Suddenly, the priest felt sad and began to cry.With tears in his eyes he asked Schweik if he had a mother. "And I, friend, am alone in the world; have pity on me!" he cried from the carriage. "Stop rambling," said Schweik. "Shut up, or everyone will say you're drunk." "My man, I'm not drunk," said the priest. "I was sober as a judge." But suddenly he stood up and saluted. "Sir, I'm drunk," he said in German, which he repeated ten times in succession, with despair, "I'm a dirty dog." He kept begging and said, "Push me out of the carriage. Why are you taking me away?" He sat down again and muttered: "There's a circle around the moon. I say Captain, do you believe in the immortality of the soul? Can horses go to heaven?" He started laughing out loud.But after a while, he was disappointed again.He looked at Schweik boredly and said, "Oh, I'm sorry, we seem to have met somewhere. Have you ever been to Vienna? I remember you came from the seminary." He entertained himself by reciting some Latin verses. "Aurea prima satis oetus, quoe vindice nullo." (4) "It won't work," and he added, "Push me down. Why don't you push me down? I won't fall." "When I fall I must put my nose on the ground," he said firmly.Then he begged, "Hey, old man, give me a slap in the eye." "Do you want one slap or several slaps?" Schweik asked. "Two slaps." "Okay, let's fight then!" The priest counted aloud while he was being beaten, and his face was full of joy. "It's good for you," he said. "This will help digestion. You can put it on my mouth again." Schweik immediately did as he wanted. "Take care!" he shouted. "I'm quite content now. Come, tear off my waistcoat, please." He made all kinds of outlandish demands.He wanted Schweik to disjoint his ankles and suffocate him for a while; clip his nails and pull out his front teeth.Expressing an eagerness to be a martyr, he demanded that his head be cut off and thrown into the river in a sack. "I'd better have a circle of stars around my head," he said cheerfully. "I need ten." Then he talked about horse racing, and then ballet, but he didn't linger long on that subject. "Can you dance Zadas?" he asked Schweik. "Can you dance the bear dance? That's how..." He wanted to get on top of Schweik.So Schweik beat him up again and put him down on the seat. "I want something," cried the priest. "But I don't know what I want. Do you know what I want?" As he spoke, he drooped his head down. "What do I want, what does that have to do with me?" he said solemnly. "That has nothing to do with you. I don't know you. Why do you stare at me like that? Can you compare swords?" For a while he became more ferocious and tried to push Schweik out of his seat.After Schweik honestly subdued him with his superior arm strength, the priest asked, "Is it Monday or Friday?" He was also anxious to know whether it was December or June.He seemed good at asking all sorts of questions, like: "Are you married? Do you like Gorgonzola cheese? Do you have bedbugs in your house? Are you really not sick? Is your dog mangy?" He talked more and more.He said he hadn't paid for his riding boots, whip, and saddle to this day, and that he had a disease some years ago which he cured with pomegranates. "No time to think about anything else," he said, followed by a hiccup. "You may find it troublesome, but, huh, huh, what shall I do? Huh, huh, tell me; so you must forgive me." "The thermos man," he went on, forgetting what he had just said. "It is a container that can keep drinks and food at their original temperature. Which game do you think is fairer, bridge or poker?" "By the way, I saw you somewhere," he cried, trying to hug Schweik. "We used to go to school together." "You're a good boy," he said softly, patting his foot. "You have grown into an adult since we broke up. All my troubles will not be in vain if I can see you." As he spoke he became poetic, and began to talk of being back in the sunshine of happy faces and warm hearts. Then he knelt down, praying and laughing. The carriage finally arrived at its destination.It was not easy getting him out of the carriage. "We're not there yet," he yelled. "Help, help! I tied tickets for them. No, I have to keep going." As hard as a boiled snail is dug out of its shell, so the priest was dragged from the carriage.For a moment it looked like he was going to be torn in two because his heels were getting tangled up in the seat.Finally, he was dragged into the hall, up the stairs, and pushed into his room.There, he was dropped on the couch like a sack.He said he would never pay for the carriage, because it wasn't his call.It took a full quarter of an hour to explain to him that the carriage was still sitting.Even then, he continued to argue. "You're trying to trick me!" he said, winking at Shuike and the coachman, "We've come all the way." But suddenly he became generous again, threw the purse to the coachman and said, "Okay, take it all. I don't care if there is more or less." In fact, to be more precise, he should have said thirty-six copper coins, and he didn't care about one more or less, because there were only so many in his purse.The coachman searched the priest, and said he was going to box him. "Well, hit me," said the priest. "Do you think I can't take it? I can take five blows from you." The coachman took another five-crown piece out of the priest's waistcoat pocket and left, complaining all the way that he was unlucky, that the priest was wasting his time and giving him less money. The priest was awake for a long time, because he kept playing new tricks.He wants to do everything: play the piano, practice dancing, fry fish and so on.But at last he fell asleep. {{3}}When Schweik walked into the priest's room in the morning, he was very depressed when he saw him reclining on the sofa. "I can't remember how I got out of bed and onto the couch," he said. "Sir, you've never been in bed at all. I put you on the couch as soon as we got here. I can't help you anywhere else." "What did I do? Did I do anything? Am I drunk?" "Sir, you are quite drunk," said Schweik. "To be honest, you had a little convulsive bout of drunkenness. I think, sir, you'd better change and wash your clothes. " "I feel as though I've been given a good beating," complained the priest. "Besides, I'm very thirsty. Did I make a fuss yesterday?" "Oh, it's nothing, sir. As for your thirst, it's because you drank too much yesterday. It's not easy to cure. I know a table and chair maker who, on New Year's Eve, 1910, had it for the first time in his life." Drunk. The next New Year's Day, he was very thirsty and upset, so he bought a herring and ate it, and then drank it again. He did this every day for four years, and there was nothing he could do, because every day On Saturdays he always buys a few herrings and eats them for a week. This is a story about a vicious circle that our old Sergeant Commander of the 91st Regiment told." The priest was listless and bitterly chagrin.Anyone who heard him talk in those days would have thought he was a frequent visitor to teetotalers. "Brandy is poison," he affirmed. "It has to be genuine. Cordials are the same. Good rums are rare, and if I had some real cherry brandy now," he sighed, "my stomach would be healed in no time." So he felt in his pockets and looked at his purse. "Good guy, I only have thirty-six copper coins left, can I sell this sofa?" He thought for a while. "What do you say? Anyone want to buy a sofa?I can tell the landlord that I have lent it to someone; or that someone has forcibly removed it from me.No, let the sofa go.I'm sending you to Captain Schnabel and see if he'll lend me a hundred crowns, for he won some money at cards the day before yesterday.If he won't borrow it, try Lieutenant Mahler at the Wersovich Barracks.If that doesn't work, try Capt. Fisher at Harald Canny.Tell him I've got to pay for the feed, and I've spent all my money on the wine.If he doesn't answer, then we'll have to pawn off the piano, what the hell!Don't let them put you off by saying I'm at the end of my rope.Make it up as you like, as long as you don't come back empty-handed, or I'll send you to the front.Ask Captain Schnabel where he got his cherry brandy, and buy me two bottles of it. " Schweik did things beautifully.His innocence and his honesty made people believe everything he said.He thought it inappropriate to say to Captain Schnabel, Captain Fisher, and Lieutenant Mahler that the priest could not pay for the horse's feed, but he thought that the easiest way to get people's support would be to say that the priest could not pay the allowance for the illegitimate child.So he got money from everyone. When he returned triumphantly with three hundred crowns, the abbé (by this time bathed and put on clean clothes) was astonished. "I got it all at once," said Schweik. "That way we won't have to worry about money tomorrow or the day after tomorrow. It's not difficult at all, although it took me a lot of begging and praying to get it from Captain Schnabel. Well, that guy is very bad. But when I told him about the illegitimate child allowance..." "Employment for illegitimate children?" repeated the priest, startled. "Yes, sir, illegitimate child's allowance. You know, how much it's paid to the girls every week. Didn't you want me to make it up? I can only think of that reason." "What a mess you are," the priest sighed, and paced up and down the room. "It's just a mess." He scratched his head. "Ah, my head hurts like hell." "When they asked who it was, I gave them the address of an old deaf woman in our street," Schweik explained. "I've got to play by the rules, because an order is an order! I've got to find a way and not let them put me off. There's people out in the hall waiting to move that piano, and I'll get 'em so they can do it for me." Let's take it to the pawn shop. It will be all right once the piano is gone.We not only free up space, but also drop money.There are days when we don't have to worry.If the landlord asks where we got the piano, I tell him the strings are broken in the piano, and it's taken to the workshop to be fixed.I've told the old woman at the gate, so they won't be surprised when the piano is reported off in the van.I also found a customer for the sofa, an old upholsterer—a friend of mine.He will come in the afternoon.A leather sofa is currently worth a lot of money. " "Did you do anything else?" asked the abbe, still holding his head in desperation. "Sir, you told me to buy two bottles of cherry brandy like Schnabel's, and I bought five. You see, now that we've got stock, we won't be starving for wine any more. The pawn shop is not closed at this time, let me see, how about sending that piano over there?" The abbé answered with a gesture, which showed that his luck was on the brink of misfortune.In a blink of an eye, the piano has been moved to the delivery truck and transported away. When Schweik returned from the pawn shop, he saw the abbe sitting with an uncorked bottle of cherry brandy in front of him, losing his temper over the steak fried at noon, drunk again.He told Schweik that he must start a new life from the next day.Drinking strong drinks, he said, is pure materialism, and man is born to live a spiritual life.For half an hour he talked in this philosophical tone.Just as he was opening the third bottle, the old carpenter came.The priest sold him the sofa almost for nothing.He asked the carpenter to stop and talk, but the trader disappointed him, and said he must go away to buy a chamber pot. "It's a pity I don't have that," said the abbé regrettably. "But one person can't be so well prepared!" After the old carpenter had left, the abbe and Schweik had another round of intimate conversation, drinking another bottle of wine along with it.Part of the conversation was about the priest's personal views on women and cards.They chatted for a long time, and Schweik and the priest hadn't finished talking when evening came. But at night, the situation is different.The abbe was back to what he had been the day before. This idyllic interlude continued until Schweik said to the priest: "I've had enough. Now you have to get me into bed and get some sleep, do you hear me?" "Well, well, my dear boy, I'll get out of bed," muttered the priest. "Do you remember, we were in the fifth class together, and I did your Greek exercises for you!" Schweik pulled off his boots and took off his clothes.The abbé promised, but at the same time he turned his gaze to someone and protested: "Look, gentlemen," he said to the cupboard, "how cruelly my relatives have treated me!" "I don't recognize my relatives," he said suddenly in a firm tone, slipping into bed. "Even if the world is against me, I don't recognize them." The room echoed with the priest's snoring. {{4}}It was about this time that Schweik visited his old servant, Mrs. Moeller.Mrs. Moller's cousin opened the door.With tears in her eyes, she told him that Mrs. Moeller had herself been arrested the day Schweik was brought to the Military Medical Review Board in a wheelchair. They sent her to a court-martial, and since they could find no evidence to incriminate her, they sent her to the Steinhof internment camp.She had sent a postcard, and Schweik picked up the treasure at home and read it: Dear Aninka: We are well-behaved here, and everything is safe.People who slept in my cubicle got chickenpox...some of them got smallpox here too...not counting, it's all safe. We've had enough to eat and pick potatoes...to make soup.I heard that Mr. Schweik has... you find out where he is buried, and after the war, you can put some flowers on his grave.I forgot to tell you, there is a box in the dark corner of the attic, which contains a puppy, a cub.But since I left, he hasn't eaten for weeks... so it's too late for me to feed, and the puppy is already... Across the letter was a pink stamp that read: "This letter has been inspected by the Reich and the Royal Steinhof Detention Camp." "That puppy was dead long ago," whimpered Mrs. Moeller's cousin. "You wouldn't know you ever lived in that place. I got some tailors to live in, and they've made it a living room. Fashion pictures all over the walls, and flowers in the windows." Later Schweik went to the bottle tavern to see what was going on.When Mrs. Parivitz saw him, she said she wouldn't sell him alcohol, because he probably came out on an errand. "My husband couldn't be more prudent," she said, beginning to strike the old tune. "Although he was as pure as a child in the womb, the poor man is in prison now. But a man deserts from the army and is free. They came here again last week to hunt you down." "We should have been more careful than you," she ended her discourse. "You see how unlucky we are. Not everyone is as lucky as you are." It was already late at night when Schweik returned, and the priest hadn't come home yet.He didn't go back until dawn, woke Schweik up, and said: "Tomorrow we will say mass for the army. Make some black coffee and put some rum in it. Or better yet, light rum." -------------- ⑴Confession is a ritual in Catholicism. Christians kneel next to the priest to repent and beg for forgiveness. A patient must repent before dying or a prisoner is about to be executed. ⑵ Polka is a quick step dance in Bohemia. (3) Latin, meaning: "May the Lord be with you, and with your soul. May the Lord be with you..." (4) From the eighty-ninth line of the Latin poet Ovette (43-18 BC).The general idea is: "Taichu is a golden age, and everyone is free." ⑸Zadas dance is a quick step dance in Hungary. ⑹ bear dance is a folk dance.