Chapter 19 Part 3 Losing the Bank of London - 5

I got out of the taxi, carried my suitcase to the sidewalk, raised my face sadly, and looked at the gray sky in the United States.I can't believe it's over like this. Until this very last minute, I was secretly hoping, desperately, that someone would change their minds and ask me to work for them.Or Luke would beg me to stay.Every time the phone rang, I would get nervous, hoping for a miracle to happen.But the hope was dashed, and the miracle did not happen. I said goodbye to Luke, feeling as if I was acting.I really wanted to cry and throw myself on him, hit his face with my hand, and do something emotional.But I can't do it.I have to maintain a little bit of dignity.So, coming back from the US pretty much went by the formula, I called the airline to book a ticket, packed my bags and hailed a cab.I couldn't bring myself to kiss Luke on the lips when I said goodbye, I just kissed him lightly on both cheeks and turned away when neither of us knew what to say.

At this point, it was 12 hours later, and I was exhausted.On a full night flight at night, I couldn't sleep in my seat, I was uncomfortable at all, I was depressed, I could say I was disappointed.When I flew to the United States a few days ago, I was in a good mood and full of ambition, thinking that I would open up a new world in the United States.But things backfired, and when I flew back, I suddenly found that not only did I get nothing from this trip, but I also made a mess of it, and everyone knew about it.When I got out of the airport and waited for the luggage to be sent out, a few girls obviously recognized me. They looked at me secretly, whispered and laughed from time to time.

Oh my God, I know I'd be that curious if I were them.But at that time, I was so ashamed that I almost burst into tears. I walked up the stone steps in front of the door with my luggage bag downcast, opened the door and walked into the house.I stood by the door of the house and looked at everything around me.There were messy clothes, scattered letters, and keys in a bowl.The living room is still the same.Life is still the same.Back to the starting point again.My haggard face appeared in the living room mirror, and I couldn't bear to look away quickly. "Hi!" I yelled. "Is anyone in the house? I'm back."

After a while, Suzie came out of her room in her pajamas. "Bex, is that you?" she exclaimed in surprise. "I didn't expect you to come back so soon! How are you?" She walked up to me, wrapped her body tightly in her pajamas, and looked at me with an uneasy expression on her face. "Oh, Bex," she said, biting her lip, "I don't know how to explain this to you." "It's all right," I said, "I'm fine. It's true." "Bex--" "Really. I'm fine." I turned around and reached into my travel bag, because I was afraid that seeing Suzy's anxious expression would make me want to cry. "Look... I brought you the Klinek beauty cream that you like, and the beauty cream that your mother likes..." I handed her the bottle of beauty cream and fumbled in the travel bag. "I have something else to give you..."

"Bex--don't be busy with that, come and sit down, come on." Susie held the beauty cream bottle I gave her, and looked at me hesitantly, "Do you want a drink?" "Don't drink!" I said, letting myself smile. "I'm fine, Susie. I guess the best thing to do is just get on with your life and not think about what happened. In fact - I'd rather we never bring it up at all." "Really?" Suzie said. "Well... well. If you think it's better." "I think so." I took a deep breath. "Really, I'm fine. So, how are you?"

"I'm fine, too," Suzie said, but she still looked at me anxiously. "Bex, you're very pale. Have you eaten anything?" "I ate some aviation snacks on the plane. The kind delivered on the plane." I took off my coat with slightly trembling fingers and hung it on the hook. "The trip... was it okay?" Suzie asked. "The trip was pretty good," I said with a forced smile, "and there was a screening of Billy Crystal: Billy Crystal: American Film Actor, Director, Producer Today." Filmmaker, playwright. -- A new film by Annotation."

"Billy Crystal's new movie!" Suzie said.She glanced at me hesitantly, as if I were a mental patient requiring special care. "Is that movie... good? I like Billy Crystal's." "It's very good. It's a good movie. It's very enjoyable to watch, really." I swallowed hard. "My earphones suddenly broke halfway through." "Oh yes!" said Suzie. "It was in a pinch. The other passengers were laughing - and I couldn't hear anything." My voice was starting to get a little out of tune. "So, I... I stopped a flight attendant and asked her to replace me with a new pair of headphones. But she couldn't understand me, and she was serving drinks to passengers, so she was very impatient... ...That's it, I don't bother her anymore. Therefore, after watching this video, I don't know the secret. But other than that, the trip was very enjoyable..."Suddenly, I couldn't help it anymore , began to sob. "You know, I can still buy a CD and watch it again..."

"Bex!" Suzy twisted her face in pain, she let go and dropped the beauty cream bottle on the floor. "Oh my God, Bex. Come here." She hugged me and I rested my head on her shoulder. "Oh, that was horrible," I sobbed, "it's humiliating, Suzy. Luke was so mean to me too...they canceled my audition too...suddenly, it's like... Like I have some kind of contagious disease. No one wants to talk to me anymore, I'm never going to move to New York..." I lifted my face and wiped my eyes with the back of my hand - Suzy's face was red and embarrassed.

"Bex, I'm not feeling well," she called. "You feel bad? Why do you feel bad?" "It was all my fault. What an idiot I was! I let the woman from the paper come in and poured her a damn cup of coffee, she must have peeked at it while I was walking away I mean, why would I serve her coffee? It's all my fault." "It can't be said to be your fault!" "Will you forgive me?" "Will I forgive you?" I stared blankly at her, my face trembling slightly. "Susie... I should be asking you to forgive me! You keep reminding me, admonishing me, but I didn't bother to call you back... I was so... so stupid, so stupid... ..."

"No, you're not like that!" "I was like that," I said, sobbing loudly again, "I don't know what happened in New York. I was like crazy. It was like... store after store, appointments... It was all so exciting...I thought I was going to be a big star and make a lot of money...but all of a sudden, it was gone." "Oh Bex!" Suzie cried too. "I'm really sorry." "It's not your fault!" I reached for a tissue and wiped my nose. "If it's anyone's fault, it's "Daily World"!" "I hate 'em!" said Suzy, through gritted teeth. "They ought to be hung up and whipped. That's what Tachin said."

"Oh, that's it," I said after a moment's pause, "so he . . . he saw what it said in the paper, didn't he?" "Honestly, Becks—I think most people see it," said Suzie reluctantly. I felt a throbbing pain in my heart thinking of Janice and Martin reading the paper.Tom and Lucy are reading too.My former classmates and teachers were also reading it.Everyone I know is reading, reading embarrassing things that humiliate me. "Well, don't be sad," said Suzy, "just leave your luggage. Let's have a cup of tea." "Okay," I said after a pause, "That's fine." I followed Suzy into the kitchen and sat in a chair next to a heater, which was warm and comfortable. "Tell me, how is Luke's plan going?" Susie asked cautiously as she put the teapot on the stove. "Not very good." I folded my arms tightly on my chest, "Actually, it can be said that there is no progress." "Really?" Suzie looked at me gravely. "My God, Bex, what happened?" "Well, my incident has caused a lot of trouble..." "That article?" "It has something to do with it." I reached for a tissue and used it to blow my nose. "He said the article blew up his plans, I was crazy about shopping. I said he was crazy about work, that his mother was...a disgusting cow..." "You said his mother was a disgusting cow?" Suzie looked shocked, and I giggled. "Well, that's what she looks like! Terrible. She doesn't even have love for Luke. And Luke can't see it...he's all about getting his big plans going and pleasing his mother. Except this Except for one thought, nothing else can be heard." "And what happened after that?" Suzie asked as she handed me a cup of tea. I pursed my lips, remembering our painful conversation when I was waiting for a taxi to the airport outside the hotel.Both of us seemed very reserved, our tone of voice was very polite, and neither of us looked at each other directly. "Before I left, I said to him that I don't think he has time to think about establishing a formal relationship between us." "Really?" Suzie's eyes widened. "You offered to blow him up?" "That's not what I meant." My voice was as low as a whisper. "I wanted him to say he had time. But he didn't say anything. It was just... terrible." "Oh, Bex." Suzie looked at me holding the teacup. "Oh, poor Bex." "It's okay," I said, trying to sound lighthearted and cheerful. "It might be better this way." I took a sip of tea and closed my eyes. "Oh, my God, this tea is so comfortable to drink. It makes people feel warm and comfortable." I was silent for a while, letting the steam from the teacup near my mouth rise slowly, warming my cheeks and soothing my muscles and bones. Relax and stretch out.I took another sip slowly and opened my eyes. "Americans can't even make tea. When I drink tea in one place, they give me... a large cup of hot water and a bag of tea, and the cup is still transparent." "Oh." Suzy grimaced. "Bah." She brought a biscuit tin and took out some snacks. "Who cares about American stuff, really," she said confidently. "I mean, everyone knows that American television is crap. You'd better not go there." "Maybe too." I stared blankly at the teacup in my hand, took a deep breath after a while, and raised my face. "Look, I was thinking about it all night on the plane. I was determined to do it all over again, to get my TV show done, to finish that book, to really get serious -- just to..." "Let them see," Suzie said for me. "Yes. Let them see." Returning home, feeling the warmth of home, has such a great soothing effect on the spirit, it is really impressive.After half an hour of this, after drinking three cups of hot tea, I already felt much better, and even got a little interested, telling Susie all kinds of anecdotes about New York and my experience in New York.When I talked about going to the beauty parlor, and the beauty there had to do transparent pattern printing on such a private part of my body, she couldn't help laughing and almost choked up. "Hey," I said suddenly, "have you finished all those Kit Kats?" "Not yet, I haven't finished eating." Susie said, wiping the tears that fell from her face with her hands. "I didn't eat much when you weren't home. What did Luke's mother say? Did she want you to show her how the transparent pattern is doing?" She started giggling again. "Wait a minute, I'll get some Kit Kats," I said as I walked over to Suzy's room, where the Kit Kats were kept. "Actually—" said Suzie, her laughter breaking off suddenly, "No. Don't go in there." "Why?" I asked, standing still in surprise. "What's in your room..." I saw Susie's cheeks slowly turning red, so I couldn't help but stop talking. "Susie!" I said again, quietly backing away from the door of her room. "What, is there someone in your room?" I stared at her blankly, she pulled her pajamas with her hands, wrapped her body tightly, and didn't say a word. "I don't think so!" I cried, at the top of my voice. "My God, I've only been away for a few days, and you have made such a terrible thing!" This was really a surprise to me.There is nothing more exciting than a sensitive subject with a strong provocation. "It's not a terrible thing!" said Suzy at last. "It's not terrible at all." "So, who is he? Do I know him?" Susie looked distressed, and hesitated to speak. "Well, this... I have to explain. You... you don't jump to conclusions, oh..." She closed her eyes. "My God, this is so hard." "Susie, what's going on?" There was a rustling sound in Susie's room, and we looked at each other without saying a word. "Okay, listen to me. It's just a one-time thing," she said quickly, "just a one-off, stupid...I mean..." "What's the matter, Suzy?" I grimaced. "Oh my God, it can't be Nick?" Nick was Suzy's latest boyfriend--the guy who was always morose, drunk, and cursing at Suzy.To be honest, Suzie's relationship with him was a complete nightmare.But I mean that was months ago. "No, it's not Nick. It's... oh my god." "Susie!" "Okay! But you have to promise you don't—" "No what?" "I won't... be too surprised." "Why am I so surprised?" I said, laughing again. "I mean, I'm not a prudish person! We're talking about..." My words faded away as the door to Suzie's room opened -- and out came Taxin, who looked all right, in satin yellow chinos and the jumper I'd given him. "Oh," I said in surprise, "I thought it was Suzie's new--" My voice stopped abruptly, and I turned my head to look at Suzie with a smile. Suzy didn't smile at me.She bit her fingernails and avoided my gaze -- her cheeks were getting redder and redder. I glanced at Taxin—he also avoided my gaze. No.impossible. she won't be- No. but…… impossible. I can't get my head around.There must be a short circuit somewhere. "Well, Taxin," Suzie said, raising her voice, "you go out and buy some bread?" "Oh, ah... yes," Taxin said a little unnaturally, "Becky, good morning." "Good morning!" I replied, "Nice to...meet you. Nice to...this shirt is beautiful." Taxin walked out of the kitchen, no one said anything, we heard the outside door slam shut.I turned slowly and looked at Suzie. "Susie..." I really don't know how to start talking to Suzie. "Susie... that person is Taxin." "Yes, I know," she said, her eyes lingering on the kitchen counter. "Susie...are you and Taxin planning to—" "No!" she yelled, as if on fire. "No, that's impossible! We're just... just..." She broke down. "You are just..." I responded to her words, expecting her to continue. "Once or twice..." A long silence followed. "With Taxin?" I said, just to reassure myself that I was right. "Yes," she said. "Okay," I said, nodding my head, as if acknowledging that this was a perfectly reasonable explanation.But my mouth was twisted unnaturally, and I felt as if there was a puff of air in my body-like shock, and like laughing hysterically.I mean, it turned out to be Taxin.Taxin! I giggled involuntarily, and immediately covered my mouth with my hand. "Don't laugh!" Suzy wailed, "I knew you would laugh at me!" "I'm not laughing at you!" I argued, "I think this is amazing!" I couldn't help laughing again, but immediately pretended to be coughing. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry. So—how did this happen?" "At that Scottish house party!" she wailed, "it was full of elderly grandmas. Besides me, Taxin was the other person under 90 years old. Just So...he looked like he was a totally different person then! He had on that cool Paul Smith sweatshirt and the cool haircut—like, is that real Tassin? I It was obsessive—you know what it does to me. He was really..." She shook her head resignedly. "I don't know how it happened. He was... a completely different person. God knows how!" There was another silence.I felt my cheeks starting to heat up. "You know, Suzy," I finally said coyly, "I think it might be a little... my fault." "Your fault?" She raised her head and looked straight at me, "What's going on?" "I gave him that sweater. And that hairstyle." I cringe at the look on her face. "But let me say, I didn't expect it to lead to ... this result! I just wanted him to be groomed!" "Well, you took care of a lot of it for him!" Suzie said through tears. "I've been nervous ever since. I've been thinking, I must be a freak." "Why?" I said, my eyes lit up. "Did he ask you to do anything?" "No, what a fool! Because we are cousins." "Ooh." I grimaced -- and then realized it wasn't the right time to do so. "But I mean, it's not illegal, it's not against anything, is it?" "Oh my God, Bex!" Suzie wailed. "It makes me feel better when you say that." She picked up her and mine teacups, put them down by the sink, and turned on the water. "I just can't believe that you really have this kind of thing with Taxin." I said. "We're not going to really keep it like this!" Suzie said sharply. "That's the point. Last night was the last time. We both agreed. It won't happen again. Never. You don't tell anyone." "I won't tell." "No, I'm serious, Bex. You mustn't tell anyone. Nobody!" "I won't tell. I promise. Oh, I remember," I said, and suddenly an idea occurred to me, "I have something for you." I hurried back to the living room, opened a suitcase, and rummaged through the greeting cards.I found one of the greeting cards, opened the folded page and wrote in pen: To Suzie, friend Bex.Then I went back to the kitchen and put the enveloped card on the table in front of Suzie. "For me?" Suzie asked in surprise, "What is it?" "open to take a look!" She tore open the envelope and took out the card.The picture on the greeting card is a tightly closed lip, and the lettering on the greeting card reads: Dear roommate - don't worry, I'll keep it a secret for you. "Wow!" she exclaimed, eyes widening. "How cool! Did you buy it just for me? But, I mean..." She frowned. "How did you know I'd have such a secret?" "Hmm... guessed it," I said, "sixth sense." "Oh, Bex, that reminds me," said Suzie, fingering the flap of the envelope. "You have a lot of letters when you're not home." "Ah, yes." After hearing that Suzie and Taxin had such a relationship, I was so shocked that I forgot about other things for a while.Now, that excitement is slowly passing.Suzie brought a large stack of vicious-looking letters from the house, and my stomach couldn't help but twitched again.Hey, it would be nice if I didn't have to come back.At least you don't have to worry about these things when you're not at home. "Okay," I said, trying to sound nonchalant, flipping through the top letters without actually reading them, and putting them down again. "Let's see it later. I'll talk about it later when I'm free." "Bex..." Susila raised her face. "I think you'd better read this one now." From the pile, she handed me a tan envelope with "Subpoena" printed on the front. I stared at it with wide eyes, feeling hot and cold all over my body.It's a subpoena.This is an ironclad fact.I was summoned by the court.I took the envelope from Suzy, but I didn't dare to look up at Suzy, so I tore open the envelope with trembling fingers.I read the summons without a word, feeling a chill run down my spine.I can't believe that someone is going to take me to court.I mean, the courts are for criminals like drug dealers and murderers and stuff like that, not for people who have a few unpaid bills. I slipped the subpoena back into the envelope and set it on the counter, panting slightly. "Bex... what are you going to do?" Suzie said, biting her lip. "You can't ignore this." "I'll take care of it. I'll pay the bill." "But do you have the money to pay?" "I'll always find a way to pay." We were both silent, the only sound in the kitchen was the tiny tick of the dripping faucet over the sink.I looked up and saw Suzie's anxious expression. "Bex—let me lend you some money. Or ask Taxin to lend you some money. He's better off." "No!" I said, more firmly than I thought. "No, I don't need help. I will..." I rubbed my face with my hands. "I'll meet that guy at the bank. Today. Now." Inspired by my determination, I picked up the pile of letters and went to my room.I will not be overwhelmed by the present difficulties.I want to wash my face well, make up carefully, and reorganize my life. "How are you going to tell him?" Suzie said, following me down the aisle. "I'm going to tell him the truth about where I'm at and ask him to give me a little more overdraft...start over from there. I'm going to do it on my own. I'm going to fight. I'm going to keep my feet on the ground." "Bex, that's great!" Suzy said. "Amazing. Hard work, hard work. It's amazing!" I fumbled with trembling fingers to open the suitcase, and she watched.The third time I tried to open the buckle, she came and took my arm. "Bex—do you want me to go with you?" "Yeah, okay." I said in a low voice. Suzie wouldn't let me go anywhere except to sit down and have a few glasses of brandy and work up my courage.She told me that she read an article the other day saying that when you go to meet people to talk about things, the best weapon is first of all the appearance - so when I go to see John Gavin, I must choose my clothes carefully .We rummaged through boxes and settled on an all-black dress and a gray cardigan, which I would describe as "simple, natural, and sedate."Suzie then took the trouble to choose her outfit, which was navy blue trousers and a white shirt.To show that she is my "reasonable and firm friend".As we were leaving, Suzie suggested again that if that didn't work, then we resorted to our bold flirting with him.In this way, we changed to more sexy underwear.I looked in the mirror and suddenly felt that my clothes looked lifeless.So, I switched to another pink coat—while reapplying the lipstick in a matching shade. At last we were out of the house and into the Fulham branch of Endwich Bank.We walked into the bank and saw Erica Parnell, Derek Smeez's former secretary, seeing off a middle-aged couple.To be honest, I never really got along with her.I don't think she's interesting enough—every time I see her, she's wearing the same navy shoes. "Oh, hello," she said with a rather unfriendly glance at me, "what can I do for you?" "I want to see Mr. John Gavin," I said, trying to sound businesslike. "Is he free?" "I don't think he'll be available," she replied dryly, "unless you make an appointment with him first." "Hmm...can you ask me?" Erica Parnell rolled her eyes. "Just a moment, please," she said, getting up and going through a door with a sign "Keep out of the way" nailed to it. "My God, it's horrible how they look like this!" Suzie said, leaning against a glass partition. "When I went to see my bank manager, he brought me a glass of champagne and chatted with me about family matters. I see, Becks, I really think you should change banks. Go to Coutts Bank. .” "Well," I said, "maybe." I casually flipped through a stack of insurance brochures, feeling a little nervous.I thought of what Derek Smeez had said, that John Gavin was a stodgy man, and he did what he did.Oh my gosh, I miss the original Mr. Smeez. Oh my gosh, I miss Luke too. This feeling of missing is like a sledgehammer constantly beating me.Since returning from New York, I have been trying not to think about Luke.But I'm standing in the lobby of the bank, and I want to talk to him so badly, I want to see him looking at me like before the accident, with that wry smile on his face, his arms wrapped around me. I secretly thought about what he was doing now, and thought about how he was meeting various people, and I didn't know what was going on. "This way, please," Erica Parnell's voice sounded in my ear, and I looked up suddenly.We trailed her, dejected, down a blue-carpeted hallway and into a cold cabin with a table and plastic chairs.Erica Parnell turned and backed out after we entered, closing the door behind her.Suzy and I looked at each other. "Should we run for the door?" I said half-jokingly. "It's all right," Susie said, "maybe he's a nice guy to meet! You see, my parents once hired a gardener who seemed very grumpy - but then we found out he He even has a pet rabbit! It shows that he is not what we used to be-" She stopped talking, the door opened, and a man in his 30s walked in.The man had thinning black hair, was wearing an ugly outfit, and was holding a plastic cup of coffee. Oh my God.The man didn't seem like an easy-going, friendly person.Suddenly, I thought it would be better not to come. "Well," he said, frowning, "I'm busy. Which of you two is Miss Rebecca Bloomwood?" He spoke in a tone as if he was asking which of us was the murderer. "Well... I am." I replied nervously. "Who is that?" "Susie's my-" "Friend," Suzie said confidently, "I'm her friend." She looked around the room. "Do you have champagne for your clients?" "No," said John Gavin, looking at Suzie as if she were a retard. "We don't have any champagne. So what's your business with me?" "Yes, first," I said still nervously, "I have something for you." I reached into my handbag and took out a greeting card and handed it to him. This is what I thought of myself, and I gave him something, expressing the hope that I would settle down with him.Anyway, it's just a courtesy sign.In Japan, this set is popular when talking about business. "Is it a check?" asked John Gavin. "Um... no," I said, feeling my face burn slightly. "Yes, it's just...a handmade card." John Gavin took one look at me, then tore open the envelope and pulled out the card, which had silver printing on it and pink feathers glued to the corners. Looking at this card now, I feel that I should have chosen a card with less rouge. Or don't send any cards at all.But this card is used to the best of its ability in this occasion. Friend - I know I was wrong, but can we start over? Gavin read the words on the card with a look of disbelief on his face.He turned the card over as if thinking it was a joke. "Did you buy it?" "That's a nice card, isn't it!" said Suzie. "Only in New York." "I see. I'll remember." He put the cards on the table, and we all looked at the cards on the table. "Then, Miss Bloomwood, what is it that you have come to see me for?"