Chapter 15 Chapter Fourteen

The time we spent together after that was pretty much what I expected.Except for the weekend when we went to visit Dad, the two of us mostly got tired of being together.Dad cooked for us that weekend and talked about the coin collection.Back at Church Hill, Savannah finished her lessons in the morning, and we were all together in the afternoon and evening.We walked along Franklin Street, went to the North Carolina Museum of History in Lowry, and even spent hours at the North Carolina Zoo.On the penultimate night before the holiday, we finally went to the fancy restaurant recommended by the shoe store clerk.Savannah didn't let me see her getting dressed before she went out, but when she finally emerged from the bathroom, she was stunning.I stared at her all night, thinking I was damn lucky.

We didn't make love anymore.The morning after we had sex, I woke up to find Savannah looking at me with tears running down my face.Before I could speak, Savannah put her fingers against my mouth and shook her head, telling me not to speak. "Last night was beautiful. But I don't want to talk about it." Then Savannah hugged me tightly, and we held each other for a long time, listening to each other's breathing.I knew then that we would never be the same, but I hadn't had the courage to identify what had changed. On the morning of my return, Savannah drove me to the airport.We sat together in the terminal, waiting for the announcement to announce boarding.Savannah circled the back of my hand with her thumb.As soon as boarding time came, Savannah threw herself into my arms and started crying.When she saw the look on my face, she forced a forced smile, but I could hear the sadness in it.

"I know I can't cry, but I can't help it." "It's going to be all right, just another six months. You have so much going on, it's going to pass quickly." "Easy to say," said Shavon. Na sniffled, "But you're right, I have to be stronger this time, and I'll be fine." I looked at her face carefully, trying to see what she was thinking, but I couldn't see anything. "Really," Savannah emphasized again, "I'll be fine." I nodded, and the two of them just looked at each other. "You remember to notice when the moon is full?" "Absolutely." I promise.

Finally, I kissed her one more time, held her tight, whispered that I loved her, and forced myself to let go.Slinging my backpack over my shoulders, I stood up and walked up the boarding ramp.Looking back, Savannah was gone, presumably because she hid in the crowd of people sending her to the airport so that I could not see her. On the plane, leaning back in the seat, I prayed that Savannah was telling the truth.Although I knew in my heart that she loved and cared about me, I suddenly realized that even if there is love and care, it is not always enough.Love and care are like the bricks that build this relationship, but there is no time to get along well, and there is always a shadow that separates the two places in the middle, just like a wall without cement.As much as I hate to admit it, there's still a lot I don't understand about Savannah.In the past, I didn't know how much separation last year had on her, but after thinking about it, I don't know how leaving this time will affect Savannah.I can't help but feel a heavy heart thinking about our relationship, and I'm starting to feel like it's all like spinning a top: when we're together, there's an incentive to keep the top spinning, and once the top keeps spinning, it feels amazing, almost childlike Good; once parted, the top cannot avoid having to slow down.Our relationship started to falter like a slowing top, and I knew I had to find a way to keep the top spinning and not toppling over.

After the experience of the previous year, I learned to be good.In Germany in July and August, I not only wrote more letters, but also called Savannah more often.When speaking, always pay attention to her tone, want to hear if she feels depressed, and also want to hear if she misses or wants me.At first, the thought of making a phone call made me nervous.But by the end of the summer, I just can't wait to make the call.Savannah's class went well, and she went back to her parents' house for a few weeks during the summer vacation, and then she was preparing for the fall class.In the first week of September, we were already counting down to my discharge: one hundred days to go.Counting the days was easier than counting the weeks or the months, and for some reason it seemed to shorten the distance between us, to speak more intimately, as if we could get over it all.They also remind each other that more difficult challenges are yet to come, in the future.Counting the days on the calendar, my doubts about this relationship gradually disappeared.I'm pretty sure nothing in this world can stop us from being together.

Then, 9/11 happened.