Chapter 14 June 4, 1928 (1) (2)

June 4, 1928 (1) (2) "So when?" she said. "What?" I said. "When are you coming again?" she said. "I'll tell you," I said.At this time she was going to buy a glass of beer, but I wouldn't let her do it. "Keep the money," I said, "and use it to buy yourself a dress." I also gave the maid a five-dollar bill.To put it bluntly, as I often say, money itself has no value, the problem lies in how you spend it.Money does not belong to anyone.There is no point in trying to save money.Money belongs only to those who are destined to earn and save money.Right here in Jefferson, there was a guy who made a lot of money for niggers selling rotten stuff.He lives above the shop in a room as small as a pigsty, and cooks for himself.Four or five years ago he suddenly fell ill.He was terrified, and when he recovered from his illness, he became a good believer and donated money to support a missionary to preach in China, five thousand yuan a year.I've often wondered if he'd die and find out there's no heaven at all, and remember the five thousand dollars a year donated, wouldn't he be mad.As I said, he might as well go on being scared, die now, and save the money.

After the letter was burnt clean, I was about to stuff the rest of the letters into my coat pocket when a premonition told me I should open the letter to Quentin before going home, but just then Al called Called me, so I had to put my things down in the front and wait on that goddam country bumpkin who spent fifteen minutes trying to decide whether to buy a yoke rope for twenty cents or five cents. "It's better to buy the high-quality ones," I said, "You are not willing to spend the capital to buy good equipment, and you expect the harvest to be better than others, so how can you do it?"

"If it's not good quality," he said, "why do you sell it here?" "I'm not saying this is bad," I said, "I'm just saying it's not as good as that." "And how do you know it's not as good as that?" he said. "Have you ever used it?" "Because it's not priced at 5 cents," I said. "I rely on that." He took the twenty-cent kind in his hand and pulled it through his fingers. "I think I'd better buy this kind," he said.I was going to take it over and wrap it up for him, but he wound up the rope and stuffed it into the pocket of his overalls.Then he took out a cigarette purse, fiddled with it for a long time and finally untied the strap on it, and shook out a few coins.He handed me a quarter and a half. "That fifty cents would get me together for lunch," he said.

"Okay," I said. "You're the best. But don't blame me next year when you have to buy another yoke." "I don't know how to plant next year's crops yet," he said.I got him off at last, but every time I got the letter out, something always happened.In order to watch the performance, people from the four townships came to the town. They came in groups and spent money. Those corrupt officials in the chief's office, they are about to share the filial money.Al was running around like a hen in a henhouse, muttering, "Yes, ma'am, Mr. Compson will be here to serve you. Jason, get this lady a butter mixer, Another nickel for the shutter hook."

Yes, Jason likes to run around and serve people.I said I didn't like it, I never had the luck to go to college, because at Harvard they taught you how to swim in the dark, but I couldn't even swim in a normal way.And in Siwanee they don't even teach you what water is.I said, you might as well send me to a state college; maybe I can learn how to stop my clock with a nose spray, and I say, you could send your squad to the Navy, but the cavalry wouldn't Wrong, because gelding horses are used in the cavalry.Later, when she sent little Quentin home and asked me to take care of her, I said that there was probably nothing wrong with it, and I didn’t need to rush to the north to find a job, and the job came to me.And then mother started crying, and I said it wasn't that I objected to raising the baby here: I could quit my job and take care of the baby myself if you like, but it's up to you and Dilsey to keep the flour buckets full , and classes.Rent him to some circus troupe for an exhibit; the world is such a big place that someone will pay a dime to see him.When I said this, my mother cried even harder, and kept chanting about my poor child. I said yes, when he grows up, instead of being only one and a half as tall as I am now, then he can I did you a great favor, when she said she would be dead soon, and then our days would be easier.So I said, okay, okay, do what you want.She is your granddaughter, and among her grandparents, you are the only one whose identity is clear.But, I say, it's just a matter of time.If you believe her assurances that she won't come to see the baby, you're kidding yourself because the first mouthful of that... Mother keeps saying thank God you don't look like the Compsons anywhere but your last name is Compson Man, since you are the only thing I have in the world now, you and Maury are the only thing I have, so I said that as far as I am concerned, I can not let Uncle Maury suffer with me. , at this point people came up and said it was time to go.Mother stopped crying.She pulled the veil down and we went down the stairs.At this moment Uncle Maury was coming out of the dining room.

① In Tennessee, there is a famous Southern University. ③Jason thought of his mother mentioning Maocai, so Enxu turned to Uncle Maolai, and from Uncle Maocai to the funeral scene after his father died in 1912, because Uncle Maocai was also present at the funeral. He covered his mouth with a handkerchief.They lined up roughly in two rows, and we came out the door just in time to see Dilsey chasing Ben and T. P. back around the corner.We went down the steps and into the carriage.Uncle Maury kept talking about poor lady, poor lady, his voice coming from the corner of his mouth, patting his mother's hand as he spoke.He was muttering words, but he couldn't make out what he was saying.

"Are you wearing black sleeve gauze?" Mother said. "Why don't they start yet, when Benjimin comes out and there will be a lot of fun. Poor boy. He doesn't know, doesn't know what's going on." "There, there, now," said Uncle Maury, clapping her hands and making a sound from the corner of his mouth. "Better like this. Don't let him know the loss of his father until he has to." "At a time like this, other women would have had children of their own to support her," the mother said. "Don't you have Jason and me?" he said.

"It was really scary for me," she said, "losing two relatives in less than two years.②" "All right, all right," he said.After a while he sneaked one hand over the night, and threw the contents out of the window.Only then did I realize what it was that I had just smelled.It turned out to be a clove stem③.I figured he thought that was the least he could do at his father's funeral, maybe the liquor cabinet mistook my uncle for his father and tripped him as he walked by.As I said, if he. ①Uncle Maury is a drinker and often drinks from the liquor cabinet in the dining room.

② Quentin committed suicide in 1910, and Mr. Kang Yinsheng died in 1912. ③People chew clove stems after drinking to get rid of alcohol. ④The "he" here is no longer Uncle Maury, but Mr. Compson. When we had to sell something to send Quentin to Harvard, we'd all be better off if we sold the liquor cabinet and used some of the money to buy ourselves a one-sleeve bodysuit. .I think the reason why the Compson family property was all ruined before I got it, as my mother said, is that he drank all the money, anyway I never heard him talk about selling it to let me go to Harvard what industry.

In this way, the uncle kept patting her hand, saying: "Poor young lady." He patted her with a black glove.We got the bill four days after the gloves because it was the 26th.Because on this day a month ago, my father went there to bring her back, and my father didn't tell us where she was or how she was. At that time, my mother cried and said, "Don't you even see him?" Didn't you try to get him to pay alimony at all?" Father said, "No, she won't touch his money, not even a penny." So mother said: "The law should bring him to his knees, and he can't prove anything unless—Jason Compson," she said, "are you so stupid as to tell—"

"Stop it, Caroline," said Father, and then he sent me to help Dilsey up in the attic to get the old cradle down, when I said: "Well, they actually put work into my house tonight." Because we've been expecting for a while that Katie and her husband would get things sorted out, and he'd take care of Katie, because mother It is always said that Katie at least has a little affection for the family. After she has a way out with Quentin herself, she may not be able to get along with me and deny me a chance. ①A kind of clothing worn by lunatics that restricts their freedom of movement. ② refers to Katie, and the "she" in front refers to Little Quentin. ③ Refers to Katie's husband, Sidney Herbert Hyde.After he knew that Katie had misbehaved before marriage, abandoned her. ④ "Jason Compson" here is Mr. Compson. "Where do you think little Quentin should be raised?" Dilsey said. "Who else will take her up besides me? Didn't I bring up your whole family?" "You did a good job," I said, "at least she's got something to worry about now." We carried the cradle down to the attic, and Dilsey started setting it up in her old room.At this time, the mother cheered up again. "Don't cry, Miss Caroline," said Dilsey. "You're going to wake the doll up." "Should she sleep there?" said the mother, "shall she be poisoned by such a bad atmosphere? Is her life not enough for her?" "Stop talking," said the father, "stop talking silly things. " "Why can't she sleep here," Dilsey said. "I took her to sleep in this room every day when her mother was too young to sleep alone." "Well, you don't know," said the mother, "that my own daughter has been abandoned by her husband. Poor little baby," she said, looking at little Quentin, "you don't know What pain others have caused." "Stop it, Caroline," said Father. "Why are you always doing this to Jason?" Dilsey said. "I was trying to protect him," said the mother. "I've always wanted to protect him and not let him be dragged down. At least I'm going to try to protect this little baby."" "How could it hurt her to have her sleep in this room? I wonder," Dilsey said. "I can't help it," said the mother. "I know I'm just a nasty old woman. But I know that those who flout God's law deserve to be punished." "Nonsense," said the father. "Then put the cradle in Miss Caroline's room, Dilsey." "You can call me nonsense," said the mother. "But don't let her know. Don't even let her know her mother's name. Dilsey, I won't let you mention her mother's name on the ground. If she grows up and doesn't know she has a mother, then Thank goodness for that." "Don't be so stupid," said the father. "I have never interfered with how you bring up and educate your children." The mother said, "But this time I can't let you go. We will talk about this issue now, tonight. If we don't let her Mention that name in front of me, or don't raise her in this family; or else, I'll leave. You choose." "Come on, stop it," said my father, "you're too excited. Put the cradle here, Dilsey." "I see you're going to be sick too," Dilsey said. "You're looking almost like a ghost. You go to bed. I'll make you a mug of hot wine to get you to sleep. I bet you haven't had a good night's sleep since you left the house." "Certainly not," said the mother. "Don't you know what the doctor does? Why do you let him drink? He shouldn't be drinking now. Look at me. I'm not in good health, but I'm not weak-willed, no. Knowing it's harmful and drinking too much." "Nonsense," said my father. "What does a doctor know? The sick don't want to do it, and they let him do it. That's the way to get money. Who doesn't know that? Everyone knows it, degenerate ape." That's what I did. Next, you should ask a priest to hold my hand.②" At this time, the mother cried, and the father went out.He went downstairs; then I heard the switch of the liquor cabinet.When I awoke I heard him going downstairs again.Mother probably went to bed or did something else, because the room was finally quiet and silent.He also kept quiet as much as possible, because apart from the hem of his pajamas and the racing sound of his bare legs and feet in front of the wine cabinet, I didn't hear any other noises from him. Dilsian picked up the cradle, undressed the baby, and put her in the cradle.She hasn't woken up since her father brought her home. ① refers to people.Mr. Compson is a cynic who thinks that the living things in the world are becoming more and more degenerate. ②Religious ceremony at the time of dying.What he meant here was: she was hoping that he would die soon. "She's a big girl, and she's about to lose sleep," Dilsey said. "I have a solution. I'll build a floor bunk in the aisle in the future, so you don't have to get up at night." "I can't sleep," said the mother. "You go back to sleep. I don't care. I'd gladly spend the rest of my life on her if I could stop—" "Well, stop talking like that," Dilsey said. "We'll take good care of her. You should go to bed too," she said to me. "You have school tomorrow." I walked out of the room, but my mother stopped me and threw herself on me and cried for a while. "You are my only hope," she said. "Every night, I thank God for you. ① As we stood there waiting for everyone to go, she said thank God, now Father has to be taken away, and you stay with me instead of Quentin Thank God you're not like the Compsons because I'm left with you and Uncle Maury now and I say to myself, well, I don't give a damn if I have Uncle Maury. Huh, He kept patting her hand with his black gloves, talking to her, and walking away from her. When it was his turn to shovel into the grave, he took off his gloves. He went to the first shovelers. Beside the people, someone held an umbrella for them to protect them from the rain. From time to time, they kicked their feet to kick off the mud on their feet. The shovel was covered with mud, so they had to knock the mud off. When the mud fell on the coffin, There was a hollow sound. As I stepped back to stand beside the cab, I saw him take another sip from the bottle, hiding behind a tombstone. I thought he was about to drink It's never over because I've got a new suit on me too, luckily the wagon wheels didn't have much mud on them then and only my mother saw it and she said I don't know when you'll make another new suit Now, said Uncle Maury, "Come, come ①The words "Thank God" shifted Jason's sympathy from the day when he picked up Quentin Jr. to the day when Mr. Compson's funeral was held.up.You don't have to worry at all, you can rely on me no matter what. " "Yes, we can rely on him at any time. ①The fourth letter is from him. But there is no need to open it. I can write this kind of letter myself, and I can also recite it to my mother Well, just add another ten bucks just to be on the safe side. But I had a hunch about that other letter. I had a hunch that it was time for her to play tricks again. After the first time she was very shrewd. She soon found out that I was not of the same type as my father. When the grave was nearly filled, my mother burst into tears, and Uncle Maury got into the carriage with her, and set off. ②He said to me you can Riding with other people; there's always someone who'd give you a lift. I've got to get your mother back first, and I was going to say, yeah, you should have brought two bottles out, one wasn't enough, but I considered Where we are, so I let them go first. They don't care how wet I am, and if I show signs of pneumonia, mother will make a fuss and have nothing to do. And let's say I'm thinking about it, watching people throw dirt into the grave, and beat the dirt like they're mixing plaster.Like a tree fence, I thought it was a bit fun, so I decided to stroll around for a while.I figured if I headed toward town they'd catch me up and give me a lift, so I went back and headed over to the black cemetery.I came under a few fir trees, where the rain was thinner, and only a few drops fell here and there. From here I could see when they finished and when they set off to go back.After a while, they all left, and I waited another minute before coming out. I had to follow the path, or the grass would wet my feet, so I didn't see her until I was very close to her, and she was standing there in a black cloak, looking at a bouquet of flowers, I knew who it was at a glance, before she turned to look at me, before she lifted her veil. ① Return to "Current". ②The day of Mr. Compson's funeral. "Hi, Jason," she said, holding out her hand, and we shook hands. "What are you doing here?" I said. "Didn't you promise your mother never to come back? I thought you were a smart woman." "Really," she said, and went to look at the flowers again.Those flowers might not be available for fifty yuan.Someone put this bouquet on Quentin's grave. "Is that what you think?" she said. "I'm not surprised, though," I said. "I've known for a long time that you can do anything. You don't give a damn about other people—you don't give a damn about what's going on with them." "Oh," she said, "that position." She kept her eyes on the grave. "I'm sorry about that, Jason." "You're sorry too?" I said. "You can't speak hard now. But why did you come back? There is no inheritance left. If you don't believe me, you can ask Uncle Maury." "I don't want anything," she said.Her eyes were still on the grave. "Why didn't they notify me?" she said. "I saw it in the newspaper by chance. On the last page, I saw it by chance." I didn't say a word.We stood there, staring at the grave, and I couldn't help but think of our childhood, one after another, and I felt a little uncomfortable, like a little crazy, and now I thought that Uncle Maury had to go again. Now that we live in our house, he has to decide the family affairs, just like he let me go home alone in the rain.I say: "You've got a good idea to sneak back as soon as your father dies. But you won't get any good. Don't think you can take advantage of the situation and come back home quietly. Since you can't handle your own horse. You'll have to." Come down and walk," I said. "We don't even know the name of the house you live in," I said. "You understand? We don't know anything about you and him and Quentin," I said. "do you understand?" ①Referring to the fact that her husband promised to find Jason a job in the bank. "I understand." she said. "Jason," she said, still looking at the grave, "if you can find a way to let me see her for a minute, I'll give you fifty dollars." "You can't come up with fifty dollars," I said. "Are you going to do it?" she said, not looking at me. "Take it out and have a look." I said. "I don't believe you have fifty dollars with you." I could see her hands squirming inside the cloak, and then she held out one.My hand was really full of money, and I saw two or three yellow bills. "He pays you back now?" I said. "How much did he send you?" "I can give you a hundred dollars," she said, "how about it?" "Just a minute," I said, "and do as I tell you. I wouldn't let her know if you gave me a thousand dollars." "Okay," she said, "do as you please. Go ahead. Just let me look at it for a minute. I won't ask you anything else, and I won't do anything. I'll go as soon as I look." " "Give me the money!" I said. "I'll give it to you when I'm done," she said. "Can't you trust me?" I said. "I can't believe it," she said. "I know you. I grew up with you." "You're the kind of person who wants to talk about other people's reliability," I said. "Okay," I said, "I can't be watered forever. Goodbye." I made a gesture of leaving. "Jason!" she called to me.I stopped. "What's the matter?" I asked. "Speak quickly, I'm getting wet." "Okay," she said, "here you are." With no one around, I walked back to her to get the money.She still held her hand tightly. "You'll do it," she said, staring at me through the veil. "You promised?" "Let go," I said, "do you want someone to come over and see us?" She let go.I put the money in my pocket, "You'll do it, Jason." She asked, "I won't beg you if there's another way." "You're right. You really can't do it any other way," I said. "Of course I'll do it for you. I said I'd do it, didn't I? Only you have to do it now." Do what you say." "Very well," she said, "I'll listen to you," and I told her where to wait for me, and then I set off for the carriage.I quickened my pace and got there just as they were unloading the horses from the cart.I asked if the fare had been paid, and the boss said no, so I said Mrs. Compson had forgotten something and needed the car, so they put me in the car.The driver was Mink.I bought a cigar to honor him.We drove the wagon around till it was dark in the back streets and people couldn't see him there, and then Mink said he'd have to drive the horses back to the garage, and I said, I'll see you later Bought him a cigar, so we drove into the alley and I walked across the yard into the house.I stopped in the hall and heard my mother and Uncle Maury talking upstairs, so I went back into the kitchen.Quentin Jr. was there with Ben, and Dilsey watched them.I said Mother was going to let Quentin go, so I carried her into the house.I found Uncle Maury's raincoat, wrapped it around her, carried her back to the alley and got into the carriage.I told Mink to drive the car to the train station.He was afraid of passing the carriage house, so we had to go around the back streets.That's when I saw Katie standing under the streetlight at the intersection, and I told Mink to keep the car close to the sidewalk, and when I said "Go," I gave the animals a whip.Then I took off little Quentin's raincoat and held her up to the carriage window, and Katie almost jumped forward when she saw her. ①A chauffeur in a carriage house. "Whip it, Mink!" I said, and Mink gave the horse a hard lash.We rushed past her like a fire engine. "Now get on the train, that's what you promised," I said.I could see her running after us through the rear window of the carriage. "One more whip." I said, "Let's go home." She was still running when we turned the corner. That night, when I counted the money again and put it away, I was very happy in my heart, and I said in my heart, I think you know how good I am now.I guess by now you know you can't just lose my errand and call it a day.It never occurred to me that she would break her promise and leave on that train, and it was my fault for knowing so little about women; I was so stupid then.I'll believe what the woman says, because what do you say the next morning, she actually walked straight into the store, but she managed to be modest, she wore a veil, and she didn't talk to anyone.It was a Saturday morning, and as I was in the store, she hurried all the way to my desk in the back of the store. "Liar," she said, "Liar." "Are you crazy?" I said. "What are you doing? Why did you come here like this?" She was about to open her mouth, but I blocked her back.I said, "You've already taken a job from me, and you still want to kill me? If you have something to say to me, we can talk about where to meet after dark. What kind of work do you want?" Say?" I said. "What did I not do that I promised to do? I told you to see her for a minute. Did I let you see? Well, did you see?" She just stood there staring at me like a pendulum It seemed to be trembling all over, and his hands were clenched tightly, as if convulsing. "I did everything I promised," I said. "You're a liar yourself. You promised me to leave on that train. Did you take it? Didn't you promise? You think you can?" Get that money back, you've got to stop thinking about it," I said. "Even if you gave me a thousand dollars. You still owe me. You know what a risk I'm taking! If I see or hear you're in town after sixteen drives away, "I said, "I'm going to tell my mother and Uncle Mao Cai. From now on, you will never see Quentin again until you die." She just stood there, staring at me, twisting her hands . "You're so hateful," she said, "You're so hateful." "Okay," I said, "you can say whatever you want, but pay attention to what I say, listen, and I'll tell 'em if you don't take seventeen." After she left, I felt much happier.I said in my heart, I think that in the future, if you want to throw away the job that you saw on my lips, you have to think about it first.I was a child at the time.No matter what people say, I will believe it.After that, I learned to be good.And, as I said, I don't think I need to rely on others for support, I can fully rely on myself.I've always been like this, and I've survived.Then all of a sudden I thought of Dilsey and Uncle Maury, and I thought that Katie would talk Dilsey into it, and Uncle Maury was a guy you could tell him to do for ten dollars.And here I am, unable to even leave this shabby shop to protect my own mother.Just like what she said, if God wants to take one of you away, I thank God that you are the one who keeps me, so I can rely on you, so I said, well, I am destined not to run far, at most Just go to that grocery store so you won't find me when you need it.Although there is nothing left in the family property, someone must guard it, right? So I pin Dilsey as soon as I get home.I told Dilsey that "she" had leprosy, and I got the Bible out and read her the part where a man's carrion fell off in pieces, and I told her if she or Ben or little Quentin "She" took a look, they would all be infected with leprosy.So I thought I had everything sorted out, but one day I came home and Ben was yelling. ① refers to Katie. He fell out, and no one could calm him down.Well, mother said, give him that slipper.Dilsey pretended not to hear the words.Mother said it again, and then I said, I'll go get it, I can't stand the noise.I've always said that I'm a very patient person, I don't expect much from them, and I never expect anything from them, but I've worked all day in a shabby general store, can I Be quiet for a while, how about a peaceful meal for your wife?So I said, well, I'll get my slippers, but Dilsey yelled, "Jason!" Then like a flash in my heart, I suddenly understood what happened, but just to be sure, I went to get the slippers; I brought them.Sure enough, as I expected, he became more violent when he saw the slippers, as if we were going to kill him.So I made Dilsey admit the truth, and I reported it to my mother.Then we had to put her to bed again.When things settled down a bit, I enlightened Dilsey about the fear of God.That is to say, there must be a little awe, and the requirements for black people should not be too high.There is such a trouble in ordering black servants. After a long time, it will inevitably become a problem, and it is impossible to send them to work.They thought they were in charge of this home. "I wonder what's wrong with letting the poor lady see her own kids," said Dilsey. "It wouldn't be so if Mr. Jason had lived." "But Mr. Jason is dead," I said. "I know you don't think much of me at all, but I think you must listen to what the mistress tells you to do. You keep torturing her like this, and before long she too will be in her grave, and by then the house will be dead." There's room for you poor niggers. Tell me, why did you let that idiot see her? ①Bengui saw Katie that day, so he made a big fuss. ② refers to Mr. Compson. "Jason, if you're a man at all, you're a hard man," he said, "and I thank God I have more heart than you, even though it's a Negro heart." "At least I'm a man and keep the flour bucket full at home," I said. "Tell you, if you do something like that again, you will never eat the bread here again." So the second time I saw her, I told her that if she followed Dilsey's way again, Mother would tell Dilsey to fuck off, send Ben to Jackson, and take little Quentin somewhere else.She stared at me for a while.There were no street lights nearby, so I couldn't see her face clearly.But I felt that she was looking at me.When we were young, whenever she was angry about something but helpless, her upper lip always twitched like this.Every time her upper lip twitched, her teeth would show more. During the whole process, she remained motionless, like a stone pillar, without moving a single muscle, except that the upper lip was raised higher and higher, and the teeth were exposed more and more. More and more came, but she didn't say anything, and when she finally came, she just burst out these words: "Okay. How much?" "Well, if it's a hundred dollars looking through the carriage window, then..." I said.Anyway, after that time, she behaved pretty well, except for one time, she asked to see the bank statement. "I know my mother's signature is on the back of the checks," she said, "but I want to see the bank statement. I want to see for myself where those checks go." "That's Mother's private business," I said. "If you think you have the right to pry into her private affairs, then I can tell her that you think those checks have been embezzled, and you want to check the accounts because you don't trust her. She didn't say a word, she didn't move, but I could hear her saying in her heart that you hate you, you hate you. "You can just say it out loud!" I said. "It's no secret what you and I think. Maybe you want to get the money back." I said. "Listen, Jason," she said. "Stop talking nonsense to me. I'm talking about her now. I don't ask to see anything. If I don't have enough money, I can send some more every month, just promise me that she can—she can—it's You can do it. Buy her something. Treat her better. I can't do these little things. They won't let me do them. ... But you won't do it for me. Your blood has always been Cold. Listen." He said, "I'll give you a thousand dollars if you try to get Mother to give Quentin back to me." "You can't come up with a thousand dollars," I said, "and I know you're lying." "Yes, I have. I will have. I can get it."