Chapter 103 Chapter VII

How Banouche has lice in his ears; how he gives up his beautiful crotch The next day, Panurge pierced his right ear in accordance with Jewish custom, and put on a small fine gold earring with a lice in it.Just so you don't get confused, he picked up a black louse (a good thing to know about everything), and the price of this louse, including all expenses, has not exceeded a Hyrcanian tigress You can estimate the expenses per quarter after marriage at six hundred thousand Malvedis.It was the first time since the payment of his debts that Panurge had spent such a large sum of money, and he felt very sorry for it, because he was supported by the blood and sweat of his subjects like a tyrant and a lawyer.

He took four "ona" gray sackcloths, made himself a robe with only one seam, took off his trousers, and fastened his spectacles to his hat. In this way he came to Pagoda, who saw him so strangely dressed that even his beautiful, well-crafted trousers, which had always been a sacred support, a last refuge against all disasters, were missing. The good Pampagne couldn't understand the gourd, and couldn't help asking him what he meant by this new attire. Panurge replied: "I have lice in my ears, and I am getting married." "Well, that's good news," said Paiguguet. But I can't hold the fire in my hand. Besides, I don't even wear a crotch, let my shirt hang down on my knees, and don't wear trousers, but only a robe, Even the color is not that of a gentleman's robe, which is by no means the proper attire of a lover.

"If it is said that in the past there have been a few crooked people who dressed strangely, and there have been many people who said they were swindling and artificial, I would not say that they were bad, nor would I have a bad opinion of them just because of their clothes. Everyone has their own hobbies, especially things that seem insignificant on the outside. They are not good or bad in themselves, because they are not born from the heart or from the mind. All good and evil are born in the heart and mind. The so-called good is to infect others with pure thoughts, and the so-called evil is to use the evil of the devil to make people bad. I don’t like only those that are unconventional and despised by ordinary people.”

"The matter of color," Banurge interjected, "is difficult to cook in the pot, and I will tell you by the way (that is my coarse cloth) that I will care about it in the future and pay close attention to everything. I am debt-free now, but If God does not help, you will see no one more annoying than me. "Look at my glasses. From a distance, you must say that I am Brother John Bourgeois ④ here. I believe that next year I can preach a crusade. May God bless my balls! "Look at this gray sackcloth of mine. It has the ability to see foresight, which few people have. I have only put it on since this morning, but I already feel like crazy. I am on my sword, and I can't wait to get married , I don’t have time to think about doing a lot on my wife, and I’m not afraid of getting a stick. Ah! I ① see "Old Testament? Chapter 5, verse 17. A slave wishes to stay with his master forever and does not want to go home, so the master takes an awl and pierces his ears.

② Hirkania: the place name east of the Caspian Sea. ③ "Malvedis": Spanish currency name. ① Meaning: I can't prove whether what you said is true or not. ② "It's really difficult to cook in the pot" (aspre aux potz) has the same pronunciation as "I tell you by the way" (apropos), and the author slipped it along, and the meaning is not coherent. ③ "Bureau" (bureau), "table" (bureau), and "tablecloth" (bureau) are all homonyms, and the author continues to make jingles. ④ John Bourgeois: Franciscan monk in the 15th century, famous prophet, known as "Franciscan with glasses".

Must be a great husband!When I die, I will be cremated with solemn ceremony, and my ashes will be preserved to be remembered as a model of the ideal husband.God that body!Don't my bookkeeper try to play tricks on me and falsify the accounts, because the ear scraper will be in his face in a moment! "Look at my front, and then at my back; it's exactly an ancient type of burqa that the Romans wore when they were not fighting. It's on the pillars of Terrajan, Rome, and Septimi The pattern adopted on the triumphal arch of Us Servilus. I hate war, I hate armor, I hate helmets. My shoulders are worn out from excess armor. Give up the arms and let the robes be in season! If If I get married, I hope so for at least the next year. Didn't you mention the law of Moses to me yesterday?

"As for trousers, my great-aunt Laurence told me long ago that they belong to the crotch. I fully agree with this statement, as that agreeable man Gallen said in the ninth volume of his "Parts and Functions of the Body", that the head belongs to the eyes.For nature might well have placed our heads on our knees or on our elbows; but, in order that the eyes may see farther, they are placed on the head, that is, on the highest stick in the body.Just as we see the lighthouses and watchtowers built on the port, it is for people to see the lights from a distance. "Also, because I thought that for a period of time, at least a year, I would try the technology of war, that is, of marriage, so I didn't wear a crotch, and therefore I didn't wear pants. Because the crotch is the first thing to dress up as a soldier. Clothes to wear. Even if I'm set on fire, I'm going to insist (listen, absolutely insist) that the Turks don't dress like warriors because their laws always forbid wearing crotch."

① Septimius Severus: Roman emperor from 193 to 211 AD. ② A line of poem by Cicero. ③ For the characters in the comedy "Bartland", see Act V, lines 158, 159. ④ It should be the fifth chapter of the eighth volume of "Functions of Human Parts".