Chapter 4 red candle

red candle ——Gong Linda's story one I sacrificed my life to keep a promise my parents made.It's something you won't take for granted.Because promises mean nothing to you.The daughter promises to come to eat, but if she has a headache, or because of a traffic jam, or maybe there is a movie on TV that she doesn't want to miss, then for her, promise, no longer exists. You couldn't come that day because you didn't want to miss that movie, so I also watched that movie by the way.The American soldier in the film promised to come back and marry the girl in the future.She was so moved that she cried, but he kept saying, "I swear, I swear! My dear, my promise is gold!" Then he pushed her down on the bed.But he's gone forever, and his gold, like the kind you hang around your neck—only fourteen carats.

For the Chinese, 14K gold is not real gold.Feel my bracelets, they must be twenty-four carats, pure pure gold. It seems too late to tell you these things now, and it is too late to change you, but I still want to talk to you a few words.Because I am really worried about your child.I've always dreaded that one day your daughter would say to me, "Grandma, thank you for the gold bracelet, I'll always remember you." But then, she'd forget all she said, she'd forget , she once had a grandmother. two Later, the GI returned home and proposed to another girl.The girl's phoenix eyes were lowered, and her face was full of shyness, because she hadn't thought of it before.Finally, she lowered her eyes, and she understood that she fell in love with him.She agreed, so they never separated again.

My marriage, however, is another matter entirely.I was only two years old when the matchmaker in the village came to propose marriage. No one ever mentioned this to me, but I can remember it clearly.It was a scorching summer day, the scorching sun made the road surface hard and cracked, and the dust billowed.Even cicadas were so hot that they kept screaming.We sat under the shade of a tree in the orchard, and the servants and brothers were busy picking pears.I was hugged in my mother's sweaty arms.At this time, two women came.One of the women had a strange voice, as if she had a mouthful of water when she spoke.

I didn't realize until I grew up that it was a Beijing accent. The two women looked at me carefully.The woman with a Beijing accent, with light make-up, looked very gentle. But the other woman's face was as rough as cracked bark. She looked at me and then at the woman with the Beijing accent. Of course, I now know that the woman with the bark-like face is the village matchmaker.And the other woman, Mrs. Hong, is the mother of the boy, whom I will marry according to the matchmaker.What the Chinese call girls are money-losing goods, but that may not always be the case, it depends on what kind of girl they are.A girl like me, but a veritable "daughter", is as greedy as a tempting, fragrant and delicious dessert.

The matchmaker kept boasting about me to Mrs. Hong: "Look, it's like a fine horse with a golden saddle. It's a perfect match. It's a perfect match." She said, holding my little hand and patting it gently. teasing me, but I pushed her hand away.Mrs. Hong muttered in a low voice with a strong tongue roll, thinking that my temper might be stubborn, but the matchmaker smiled and said: "Where, where! Look at how strong the little girl is. In the future, I may It can be of great use, and when you get old, she will take good care of you." Mrs. Hong just had a sullen face, bowed her head and looked at me from side to side, as if she was weighing, once this in-law is married, will it be a blessing or a curse?I will never forget her expression at that time, a pair of bony, round eyes dangling in front of me, after examining me carefully, she finally grinned, a bright star The big gold teeth are so dazzling that my eyes hurt. Looking at her bared teeth, it seems that she wants to swallow me in one bite.

In this way, I got engaged to Mrs. Hong's son.I found out later that he was one year younger than me at that time, just a little kid in a swaddling baby.His name is Tianyu, the word "Tian" is enough to show how noble and important he is, and "Yu" means surplus.Because when he was born, it was his father who was critically ill, and his family was afraid that he would die, and Tianyu would preserve his father's spirit that had not yet dissipated.Unexpectedly, his father recovered from his illness.His grandmother was worried that those ghosts in the underworld would not be reconciled and would demand their lives from Tianyu to pay for it, so she loved him very much, kept it in her mouth all day for fear of melting, and held it in her hand for fear of blowing it off, but she was obedient to him anyway. , he was completely spoiled.

Even though I knew later that I was going to marry such a terrible man as my wife, I didn't dare to disobey and could only accept my fate.Now I understand that the old-fashioned and old-fashioned families in the countryside at that time were like this.The pace of life in our family is always a few beats slower than others, and we abide by pedantic and stupid old customs.In some cities at that time, men were already free to choose their wives, but of course they had to get their parents' permission in the end.But this new trend of thought has nothing to do with our family. Therefore, there is no way to smell the atmosphere of the new era in other cities, and even the few words heard are accused of being scandalous.Neighborhoods circulated tales of how sons, at the instigation of their wives, drove them out of the house despite the pleas of their elderly parents.Therefore, mothers in Taiyuan would rather follow the old custom of picking their daughter-in-law, and choose a daughter-in-law who can take care of her husband, be filial to her parents-in-law, and continue the incense of her husband's family.

Because I have already been betrothed to the Hong family as a daughter-in-law, the family seems to have treated me as someone with a different surname.Whenever I held my job too close to me, my mother would say, "Look, the wife of the Hong family eats like this!" My mother doesn't love me.The so-called married daughter spilled water, sooner or later I belong to someone else's family, so she no longer has any expectations of me. In fact, I am a very obedient child, but sometimes, if I feel too hot on my body, or if I feel uncomfortable or even sick, I will look listless and sad, and my mother will complain a lot at this time. "Look at your ugly face. If the Hong family changes its mind, there will be no place for our family's face to be saved." So, I crooked my mouth and cried, which made me even uglier.

"We're not afraid," my mother went on, "we're engaged, it's a matter of course." At this point, I cried even louder. I didn't meet my fiancé until I was eight or nine years old.At that time, my world was a courtyard in a village on the outskirts of Taiyuan City, where I lived.Our family lived in an ordinary two-story building, plus two back rooms, which were the kitchen and the lower room.The courtyard of our house is located on a small hillside. We call that hillside "Three Heavens". In fact, it is just a small mound formed by the accumulation of sand under the impact of the Fen River.Outside the east wall of my yard is the Fen River meandering by.The father said that it likes to devour children. Once, it swallowed the whole city of Taiyuan!This river is yellow and turbid in summer, and in winter, it is blue-green in the narrow and fast-flowing part of the river, while in other places, it is covered with glistening white ice, exuding a threatening chill.

I still remember that before the Chinese New Year, my family caught a lot of live fish in the river.Fishing only needs to break open the ice, because they are sleeping under the ice, so it is very easy to catch, all of them are alive and kicking, even if they are disemboweled and thrown into the oil pan, the tails are still flicking . When I first met my fiancé, he was howling and crying because of the firecrackers.He grinned and whined loudly, even though he was no longer a baby. I saw him again when he was sitting on his grandmother’s lap at a certain family’s full moon banquet. I thought, his stature would crush the old bones of my grandmother. He should have passed The age of sitting on the lap.Moreover, he was a very picky eater, and almost didn't like to eat anything. I saw him wrinkling his nose and turning his head around, as if someone forced some stinky pickles to him.

So you see, I can't have the kind of affection for my fiancé that you see on TV.To me, this boy is more like an unlovable cousin of mine.I have learned to respect the members of the Hong family, especially Mrs. Hong.Whenever my mother pushed me to Mrs. Hong and said: "Here, let's talk to your mother." At this time, I would be very puzzled, not knowing which mother she was referring to as "Mom".Therefore, I would first look back at my mother, "Excuse me, Mom." Then I would greet Mrs. Hong and serve her some snacks. "Please use, Mom!" I remember one time, I served shumai, and another time, it was the kind of small balls I like to eat.My mother told Mrs. Hong that I made these glutinous rice balls specially for her. In fact, everything was done by the chef. I just touched the side of the steaming bowl when they were served in the bowl. When I was twelve years old, my life suddenly changed.That year, the Fenhe Gate was flooded. The flood engulfed the entire plain and destroyed my family’s wheat field. Even my house could not be lived in. When we went downstairs, the floor and furniture in the house were covered in chaotic mud. middle.The yard was full of downrooted tree trunks, crumbling walls and drowned livestock.In the face of catastrophe, we really have no way to go to heaven and no way to go to earth. No insurance company will pay you a million dollars. Anyway, if there is a disaster, you can only grit your teeth and accept your fate.Apart from leaving his hometown and moving south, there is no other way out.At that time, my uncle ran a flour mill in Wuxi, a small city near the west of Shanghai, and our family decided to join him.But this "our family" no longer includes me.My father thought that I was already twelve years old, and I could leave my natal family to live. Because there is mud and potholes everywhere, it is impossible to hire a car, so my father had to leave all the heavy furniture and soft bedding as my dowry.Our family is very practical.My father said that my dowry was very generous.But he still couldn't stop the "private house" that my mother gave me-a necklace inlaid with rubies.When she clasped it around my neck, it was too rough, so I thought she was very sad. "Listen to the Hong family and don't embarrass our family." She said, "Go happily. In fact, you are very lucky." three The Hong family's house is also on the bank of the Fen River. Because of its relatively high location, when my house was flooded, his house was intact.This is the first time I realize that his family's family status is higher than mine, and they look down on us now.Only then did I understand why Mrs. Hong and Tianyu had their nostrils turned towards me all day long. I came to the brick and wood arch of Hong's house, walked through a huge courtyard, and saw several low houses, which were storage rooms and lower rooms, and the main building was at the end. I gazed intently at the house which would be my home until my death.There have been generations of people living here, the house is not too old or notable, but I can imagine it growing up with the family.The house has four entrances, each of which houses a generation of members: great-grandparents, grandparents, parents and children.The layout of the house is very chaotic, whether it is the floor, the partition of the house or the pendant and decoration, it reflects too much intention.The first entrance is made of cobblestone mixed with straw mud, the second and third entrances are made of bricks, and there are also open-air passages, which have the momentum of a pagoda in a palace. The roof is made of red bricks. Show a solemn momentum.Two large columns support a majestic door frame. The columns are painted vermilion, the same vermilion as the wooden frame of the window lattice.Dragon heads are carved on the eaves, which may have been Mrs. Hong's idea. The furnishing of each room in the house is different, the most particular one is the living room on the ground floor, which is where the Hong family receives guests. In the hall, there are red lacquered furniture of various colors, cushions and carpets embroidered with Hong's surname, and a variety of antiques and decorations, showing the financial strength and prestige of the Hong family.As for the other rooms, the furnishing is much simpler, and they are not comfortable. There are more than twenty people living under one roof. There are many contradictions in the big family, and the intrigue is full of chattering disputes and complaints.The birth of each new generation of members made the building more and more crowded, and the large room had to be divided into two or even more small rooms. The Hong family did not hold any grand ceremony to welcome me, the living room on the ground floor was not decorated with lights and festoons as usual, and Tianyu did not come out to greet me.Instead, Mrs. Hong immediately called me into the kitchen, which is usually where the servants gather.So, I immediately understood my position in the Hong family. On the first day, I put on my best padded jacket, stood in front of a small table and began to help chop vegetables.I could barely get my hands on the handle of the knife because I was thinking about my family.But I know that this is where I belong.No matter what, I will not embarrass my natal family, and I will not let Mrs. Hong find the slightest fault here. A maid was cutting a fish across the table, secretly watching me from the corner of her eye from time to time.I don't want her to see me crying, I'm afraid she will tell Mrs. Hong about it.So, I said with a smile on purpose: "I'm so lucky, I will live a good life here." In order to show that I am really happy, I can't help but make a happy gesture of dancing and dancing. With a kitchen knife.The knife was waving right in front of her, and she yelled angrily: "What's it like?——" The subtext was stupid.I woke up instantly.Because while I was pretending to be happy just now, I almost deluded myself into thinking that I would be happy. At the dinner table, I saw Tianyu, he was a bit shorter than me, but he behaved very domineeringly, like a big warlord.Only then did I know what kind of a good husband I had. Anyway, he tried everything possible to force me to cry.One moment they said the soup was cold, and they spilled it on purpose, and another moment they made me do this or that on purpose. Anyway, as soon as I sat down at the table, they ordered me to add more food or wait for him, so that I would not have a peaceful meal. meal. Moreover, he also complained that I always kept a straight face in front of him and never smiled all day long. After a few years like this, Mrs. Hong asked the servants to teach me how to embroider pillowcases and make needlework. "A good wife should always have her hands free." This is what she often begins when she asks me to time a new job. But I think her own hands are always free, and she His specialty is just order and pickiness. "Teach her how to wash rice, her husband can't eat that kind of sandy rice." She once ordered the servants in the kitchen. Another time, she asked another servant to teach me to clean the toilet: "Tell her to stick her nose in and smell it to see if it's clean?" In this way, I tried my best to learn to be a virtuous wife.I cook good dishes, and I can judge the saltiness of meat stuffing without even tasting it.My needlework is also impeccable. The flowers I embroider are like paintings, and even Mrs. Hong can't be picky. Gradually, I got used to life here, and I no longer think that I am suffering, really, not at all.Nothing makes me happier than seeing people gobble up my cooking.Moreover, I often get a nod of appreciation from Mrs. Hong, and she even pats my head to express her satisfaction after combing her hair every day, all of which make me happy.Tianyu no longer complains about my cooking, or even cares about my lack of smile, all of which make me happy, just like those ladies in detergent commercials on TV now, when they remove a stain from a dress, Then he smiled happily. In a blink of an eye, three years later, I will be sixteen years old.Mrs. Hong told me that next spring, she wanted to have a grandson, but ignored that I didn't want to get married at all.But what can I do?Although I am as strong as a tall horse, where can I escape?Today's China is full of Japanese soldiers. Four "These uninvited Japanese," complained Tianyu's grandmother, "are their world now." Mrs. Hong arranged our wedding carefully, but the scale was still modest. She sent out posts to folks in the village and loved ones everywhere, when we didn't have R. S． U． P． (Reply note——Translator's Note), it is impolite to receive an invitation and not come.Mrs. Hong believed that the war could not change people's emphasis on etiquette.Therefore, the cooks began to prepare rich dishes, and the old furniture brought by my mother's family had already been wiped and put in the front hall as my dowry.Mrs. Hong also asked someone to write two auspicious words of congratulations on the red satin in the tone of my parents.I was arranged to live temporarily in a neighbor's house, waiting for the Hong family's sedan chair to pick me up on a lucky day. But our luck was really bad. Although the matchmaker chose August 15th as a good day, the Japanese called in just a week before August 15th.They broke into Shaanxi, which is very close to us, and made people panic.On the morning of August 15th, it started to rain, which was an ominous sign.The rumbling thunder and roaring lightning mistook people for Japanese bombs. Everyone hid in their houses and dared not go out, and few people came to drink the wedding wine. In order not to make the wedding look too deserted, Mrs. Hong postponed the wedding for several hours, and did not start the wedding until she realized that there were really no more guests.She cannot defy war. I sat by the window in the next room and waited.Thinking of how I had to sacrifice myself for a pact my parents made many years ago.Why should my fate be decided by others?Why should I sacrifice myself for the happiness of others?Outside the window, I saw the muddy Fen River flowing slowly and calmly.I cried, I wanted to jump down, anyway, it has ruined my family's happiness and everything.When a person feels that the road of life has come to an end, many strange thoughts often come up. One day, it was raining again, the rain was not heavy, I only heard people downstairs urging me loudly, my thoughts became more and more bizarre, and I couldn't explain it myself. I stood by the window alone, pondering and daydreaming, and couldn't help asking myself, what is the true nature of a person?Just like the water of the Fen River, it is yellow and turbid in summer, and blue-green in winter, but it is still the Fen River.But me, can I change like Fenhe, but still maintain the same "I"?I was still sitting by the window, only to see the curtains being held hostage by the wind, violently lifted and swayed.Outside the window, the rain became heavier, causing passers-by to run away screaming.I laughed.I feel that this is the first time I feel the power of the wind.It is true that I cannot see the wind, but I can see it driving the river slowly flowing in the same direction, irrigating and nourishing the earth, like covering the fields with a large silver net.It can make people curse at will, and it can also make people rejoice. I wiped my eyes in the mirror, and unexpectedly found that the self in the mirror had a new look. I am wearing a beautiful red dress, but my value is not because of this red dress; I am healthy, pure, deep in my heart, retaining a sense of life, which is only mine, no one knows, and No one can take it away.I feel that I am like the ethereal yet powerful breeze. I raised my head and smiled proudly in the mirror, and covered my face with the scarlet embroidered silk scarf, and at the same time, covered all the thoughts that just popped up.However, under the red silk scarf, I still know very well who I am. Right now, I promise myself: I will always keep my parents' expectations in mind, but I will never forget my "self." Covered in a red silk scarf, I fumbled to be led to the auditorium. Only occasionally when I leaned forward, I could vaguely glimpse some figures through the edge of the scarf. The congratulatory guests were pitifully few. Dear, with a warm face, I am very annoyed and embarrassed by this.The drummers tried their best to blow the suo sound and pull the huqin, babbling. Only a few neighbors risked their lives and refused to give up this free feast. At the moment, even servants and children were brought in to make up the number. I just followed the man who led me forward.Like a blind man, I grope along the path of my destiny, but I don't feel sorry for it anymore, because I have fully realized it in my own heart. A respectable official presided over the wedding, and he babbled a lot, citing scriptures, from Confucianism to the martyrs and virgins of all time.Afterwards, the matchmaker read out the horoscopes of our two birthdays, explaining that our horoscopes match and we are a pair made by nature.I leaned forward slightly, and saw the matchmaker take out a red candle from a package of red silk scarves. Both ends of the candle could be lit, and Tianyu's and my name were engraved in gold letters respectively. After the matchmaker lit both ends of the candle, he announced: "Baitang!" His family and guests smiled, but they didn't even glance at me.He reminded me of a young male peacock I had seen as a child bent on spreading out his short, unglamorous tail in the yard. The matchmaker put the lighted candle in a gilt candlestick and gave it to a servant beside him.The servant carefully took over the candlestick. Her duty was to guard the candlestick carefully to ensure that both ends of the candle would not be extinguished during the whole wedding banquet.Early the next morning, the matchmaker will come to check. If the two ends of the candle are still burning, it is a good sign, which symbolizes that the marriage will last forever. This candle, which symbolizes marriage, is more authoritative than the promise of non-divorce in the Catholic Church. It means that not only can I not divorce, but even if Tianyu dies, I cannot remarry.This red candle seems to use its candle oil forever to stick me to my husband and to the Hong family, and I will never be freed. Predictably, the next morning, the matchmaker inspected the candlesticks and announced that she had made a match, but I knew exactly what was going on.Because of the wedding night, I stayed up all night, crying silently for my marriage. Fives After the wedding feast was over, the guests crowded us into the new house on the third floor. They laughed loudly, booed, dug red eggs into the bedding, and hid under the bed to play.Those boys who were about the same age as Tianyu forced Tianyu and me to sit side by side by the bed, forcing us to kiss and perform various intimate actions.In the aisle outside, there was a sudden sound of firecrackers, they said, that was the best chance for me to get into my husband's arms. After all the guests dispersed, we still sat side by side silently for a while, outside, the chatter and laughter of the guests was still vaguely heard.When the surroundings finally became quiet, Tian Yu said, "This is my bed, you can sleep on the sofa." Then, he threw all the pillows and blankets over.I was a little overjoyed.After he fell asleep, I got up quietly, followed my toes down the stairs, and stood in the dark yard. There was a smell of rain in the air, and it was going to rain again soon!I paced the yard with my bare feet, and I could still feel the warmth of the day on the damp green brick floor with my toes.I burst into tears and rolled down, and walked out of the yard.In a window of the lower room, I saw the maid who was ordered to take care of the candlestick, watching the lit candlestick sleepily. I sat down quietly leaning against a tree, silently watching my "destiny" ". I must have fallen asleep.A dull thunder woke me up, and I saw the maid running out of the house in a panic, like a headless chicken.She was also woken up by Lei, maybe she got confused and thought it was the Japanese dropping bombs.I couldn't help laughing out loud.At this time, the sky was gradually getting brighter, and the thunder was rolling incessantly. The maid had already rushed out of the house and fled to the courtyard. She ran so fast that she kicked up sand and gravel behind her heels.Where could she escape?I just find it funny.At this time, I saw the flames swaying violently in the wind on the candlesticks in the house. I let my legs carry me across the courtyard and into the candlelit room numbly.But my heart is praying devoutly, asking Bodhisattva to bless me, let the candle go out, go out!The flames just kept swaying and jumping, sometimes fading and sometimes brightening, watching them gradually fall down, and suddenly, they brightened again.Strong sudden prayers choked in my throat, I held back, held back, and finally, they exploded, and with a "thump", the candle representing my husband was blown out. Immediately, I was terrified, and I thought that a knife would appear and cut my throat.At this moment, my uncle would have the world fall apart and snatch me away, but nothing happened. When I came back to my senses, I quickly fled back to my room. Early the next morning, the matchmaker proudly announced in front of Tianyu, me, and my parents-in-law: "A happy marriage for a hundred years!" Then, under her guidance, the leftover candle oil was carefully poured on the red cloth. , I caught a glimpse of the nervous look on the maid's face. six I started to learn to love Tianyu, but it was not as easy as I thought.At first, I was so nervous that he would climb on top of me and do what he was supposed to do, that every night I would go back to the bedroom and feel my scalp tingling with nervousness.But during the whole month of our wedding, he didn't even touch me. Anyway, he slept in his bed and I slept on my sofa. To my in-laws, I was a submissive daughter-in-law, just as they worked so hard to raise.I ordered the cook to kill a broiler chicken every morning and boil it into original chicken soup without adding water. Then I poured it into a bowl with my own hands. This was Tian Yu's daily breakfast.And every night, I have to cook a pot of special nutritious soup - called Bazhen soup, which is not only delicious, but also extremely nutritious, which is very popular with my mother-in-law. But I still can't satisfy my mother-in-law.That morning, I embroidered with my mother-in-law, and recalled a frog named Dafeng that I raised when I was young.Suddenly, my mother-in-law seemed unhappy, and before I could understand, she got up and slapped me across the face. "You evil daughter-in-law," she scolded me, "If you don't share the bed with my son, I won't raise you anymore." At this moment, I understood that my husband pushed everything on me.I was also furious for a moment, but I immediately remembered that I promised my parents that I would be a good wife and mother, so I swallowed it hard. That night, I sat on the edge of Tianyu's bed, waiting for him to touch me, but he didn't.I got relief.The next day, I lay beside him and waited, and he still didn't touch me.Another day passed, and I simply took off and lay beside him. Now I can understand the ability of that thing on Tianyu.I saw him turn around in horror.He didn't want me, his panicked fear made me understand that he didn't want any woman, he wasn't a man at all. I was no longer afraid of him, and I even developed a strange feeling for him. This was not the love a wife has for her husband, but the sympathy and love a sister has for her brother.I put on my pajamas again, lay down on my side next to him, and gently scratched his back. I know that from now on I don't need to worry about Bo and Tianyu sharing the same bed.He will never touch me; and I have a comfortable bed. Several months passed, and my abdomen was still flat. My mother-in-law was furious again: "My son said that the seeds he removed were enough to reproduce for generations, but why haven't you seen anything? The fault must be on your body." Since then, she confined me to the bed and was not allowed to get up, so as to ensure that the seeds of her son would not be lost. Look, there are such interesting things in the world, lying on the bed all day, eating, drinking and lazing on the bed.Let me tell you, this kind of day is worse than a prisoner. The mother-in-law wants to hold her grandson, and she wants to go crazy. She asked the servants to take away all the utensils with blades. She thought that scissors and kitchen knives would kill her. She forbade me from sewing, saying it would distract me from conceiving a child.Four times a day, a beautiful little girl brought the unpalatable soup. I really envy this little girl, who can walk in and out freely.My eyes followed her out of my room, and I imagined that I would also stroll out of the courtyard like her, chatting with the cobbler outside, chatting with the maid, and flirting with the male servant. So day after day, I lay on the bed for two full months, and there was still no movement on my body.The mother-in-law called the matchmaker, and the matchmaker carefully calculated my birth date, and then asked her about my five elements, and finally she slapped her knees and said, "It's clear now, only women who lack one of the five elements and your daughter-in-law is short of gold in the five elements, which is an excellent sign. But when she got married, you gave her gold bracelets and other gold utensils, so she has all the five elements, It's too balanced, so how can you have a baby?" For my mother-in-law, this was of course a happy conclusion.Because she had a good excuse to take her gold jewelry back, and that wasn't bad for me, because I felt a bit of relief after taking the gold jewelry, which was also a relief. Maybe they're right, a lack of gold bodes well for me.I began to think about how to escape from this marriage cage without dishonoring my natal family's reputation. In fact, it's very simple, all I need is the Hong family to give me a body script, and everything will be solved. I racked my brains for several days, carefully observing the words and expressions of the people around me.After making up my mind, I chose the third day of March, which is Qingming, a day to commemorate my ancestors.On this day, everyone has to visit graves and pay respects to their ancestors. Everyone took hoes and shovels to weed and add soil in front of the ancestral graves, and took out cakes and oranges to offer sacrifices to the dead. All this seemed more like a happy festival of picnics than a sad day of mourning for relatives.But for those who are eager to have grandchildren as soon as possible, the significance of Qingming Day is still very important. Early that morning, I woke up Tianyu and the whole house around me with a sudden cry.After crying like this for a long time, my mother-in-law came in and asked, "What's wrong with her again?" At first, she just ordered in her room: "Tell her not to make noise." But I still couldn't stop crying, and she rushed Come in and scold me loudly.I covered my eyes with my hands and writhed uncontrollably, as if I was enduring enormous torture and pain.I must have done a lot like it because I saw my mother-in-law take a few steps back in fright. "What's the matter, child, what's wrong?" she asked. "Oh! I was scared to death, I was scared to death!" I gasped and cried even harder. "I had a dream," I said, "I dreamed that my ancestors told me that they were going to witness my wedding with their own eyes. Therefore, Tianyu and I had another wedding ceremony in front of our ancestors; I saw the matchmaker light a candle and give it to a servant, and I saw: the ancestors were very happy.  …” My mother-in-law became impatient, so I cried again: "But then, a gust of wind blew out the candle. The ancestors got angry and said that this marriage was very unlucky. They said that the candle representing Tianyu went out , which means that Tianyu is going to die." When Tianyu heard this, his face turned pale.My mother-in-law just frowned, and said quietly: "Silly girl, how can such a dream be made!" and ordered everyone to disperse. "Mom," I stopped her with a hoarse voice, "don't go, I'm afraid. Our ancestors said that if we don't listen to his warning, he will punish us and torture us endlessly." "It's just talking nonsense!" the mother-in-law yelled, turning around to leave, Tian Yu was also busy following his mother with a tense face.I was secretly proud: they were fooled, and the fish was hooked! "They didn't expect you to believe what I said," I put on a look of resignation, "and they knew I didn't want to leave here because it was too comfortable. So the ancestors say they have fulfilled it in us .” "What nonsense are you talking about?" The mother-in-law sighed deeply, and finally couldn't help dragging out another sentence: "What fulfillment?" "That was said to me by a bearded man with a mole on his cheek." "Oh, that's Tianyu's grandfather!" My mother-in-law screamed, and I nodded.I have seen photos of Tianyu's grandfather. "He said three fulfillments. First, he has drawn a mole on Tianyu's back. In the future, this mole will gradually expand and eventually kill Tianyu." The mother-in-law immediately lifted up Tianyu's blouse, "Ah!" she cried out, and there was a black mole the size of a fingernail on Tianyu's back.That's what I discovered while sleeping with her like a sibling for the past five months. "Then he touched my mouth again and said my teeth were falling out every day until we ended that marriage." I happened to have a missing tooth in my mouth, which was lost by decay four years ago. "In the end, he said that there was a maid who was born with a noble son, that this girl had the blood of the royal family, but fell into a poor family by accident, and he said that she was the wife destined to be born, and she would carry on the family line for him Continue the incense of the Hong family." After that, they summoned the maid who was in charge of taking care of the big red candle when we got married, and after questioning, the maid truthfully told the truth about the extinguishing of the candlestick. Then, according to my description, they finally found the beautiful girl I mentioned in my dream.我常常看见她在窗外与一个男当差调情，每当那个俊俏的男当差一出现，她就眉开眼笑。渐渐地，我看得出她腹部隆起来了，而她的神情则显得惊惶不安。 所以你能想象，当洪家人找到她，并要她承认自己原是皇室之女的真相时，她是多么的喜出望外。后来我听说，她对于能成为洪家的媳妇这一事实，只觉得幸运又知足，是做梦也想不到的，不知是哪里修来的福分。她对洪家十分感激，立志当好洪家的贤妻良母。 seven 故事讲到这里，该完了。反正大家都皆大欢喜。洪太太终于抱上孙子，我得到一张去北京的火车票，并允许可以带走我的衣物及一笔足够去美国的路费，洪家要求我永远不向人提起这场与他们的婚姻关系。 看，我就是这样为着兑现立下的诺言，几乎赔上自己的一生。瞧我身上佩带的金器，这两只手镯是生下你哥时你父亲送我的。后来，我又生下你。从此每隔几年，当我积了些钱，我就去买上一点金器。它们全是二十四K的，货真价实的纯金，有如我估量自身的价值一样。 可我永世忘不了那年的清明，我终于解除了套在身上的枷锁。我也永远忘不了那天，我终于醒悟了，发现了一个真正的自我，并任凭着这个“我”的思想来带领自己。就是那一天，我覆着新嫁娘的头巾，独坐在窗边，答应自己永不忘记自己。 要是再能当一次那个女孩该多好！一把掀掉蒙着的头巾，意想不到地发现一个光彩四溢的自己！