Chapter 3 -3

"So, Tyrese, I hope you don't have hope or fear in the future world created by these primitive lies, Tyrese, don't have any doubts, especially don't want to use it to create constraints on ourselves. We A small part of an inferior, primordial substance, we are annihilated forever when we die, that is to say, when our constituent elements combine with those of the whole. Whatever we may have done in life, we There is always a moment when everything falls into the melting pot of nature, and then spews out again in other forms. At this time, those who madly burn incense for morality have no more privileges than those who indulge in lust, because nature does not I feel that what offends it, as long as it is a human being, it comes out of its embrace, and the behavior in this world is based on the impulse given by it. After they leave this world, they will regain the same home and destiny in nature.”

I was about to refute these horrible blasphemies of his when I heard a man on horseback approaching us. "Take up arms!" shouted "Heart of Stone". He was more anxious to put his theory into action than to consolidate his theoretical foundation.They went off again to rob... and in a little while they led an unfortunate traveler into the grove where we were camped. The robbers asked the man why he was traveling alone on a lonely road so early, and asked his age and occupation.The man on horseback replied that his name was Saint-Florent, and that he was one of the richest merchants in Lyons.He was thirty-six years old, had come from Flanders on a business matter, and had not much money with him, only a great deal of receipts.He added that his servant had left him the night before, and that he was walking by night to avoid the heat, and wanted to go to Paris that very day.In Paris, he would just find another servant, and then he would take care of part of the business.Besides, he took this lonely track, probably because he fell asleep while riding and lost his way.After saying these words, he begged for his life, offering to give everything he had with him.They checked his purses and counted his money, and they couldn't have been better off.Saint-Florent had nearly half a million bills payable at sight, some jewels, and about a hundred louis...

"Heart of Stone" pointed a pistol at his nose and said to him, "My friend, you have to understand that after robbing you like this, we still can't let you live." "Oh, sir!" I exclaimed, falling on my knees at the villain's feet, "I beg you, while I join the gang, do not let me see the terrible sight of this unfortunate man's death! Let him live Now! Please do not deny my first request for forgiveness to you." There had to be a legitimate reason for my concern for this man, and in my haste I immediately invented a rather peculiar one. "The gentleman mentioned his name just now, but I remember that I am a distant relation with him. Don't be surprised, sir," I said hastily to the traveler, "that you should not be surprised to meet a man in this situation." I will explain all this to you, kinsman." Turning again to our chief, I begged, "For this reason, sir, spare the poor man's life for me! I will do everything in my power to repay your favor. .”

"Heart of Stone" replied, "Terris, you know what I promise you, you know what I want from you..." "Yes, sir, I promise anything," I cried, rushing between the unfortunate man and his boss, "yes, anything, sir, anything, let him go!" .” "Heart of Stone," said, "let him live for the time being, but he must join us, and that is a condition. Otherwise, there is nothing I can do, and the fellows will object." The businessman was taken aback, and didn't understand how I could be related to him. However, seeing that his life could be saved if he agreed to these proposals, he naturally knew that he could not hesitate for a moment.They gave him something to eat and planned to leave the place at dawn.

"Terris," "Stone Heart" said to me, "I agree to your request, but I am too tired tonight, you can rest quietly beside Dubois, and when the day is about to dawn I'll call you again. If you dare to hesitate, if you dare to play tricks, I will kill this kid!" "Go to sleep, sir, go to sleep," I answered, "and please believe that I am so grateful to you that I wish nothing but to repay you." This is far from what I want to say, but I think that if it is possible to deceive, so be it.The rascals were so convinced of me that they went on drinking, and soon fell asleep.Dubois, who was beside me, was as drunk as the others, and soon closed his eyes.My movements are completely free.

While the thugs around me were sleeping soundly, I seized the moment and said to the young merchant of Lyons: "Sir, the most dreadful calamity has brought me into the midst of this band of thieves. Bad luck for thieves. I don't think I have the honor of being your kinsman, but I'm just playing tricks, hoping to get you and me out of the hands of these thieves." I added, "Now is the right time, let's run away! I see your money bag is there, you take it quickly. The cash is in their pockets, so don't take it. If we want to move it, there will be money." Dangerous. Let us go, pity my fate, don't be so cruel like these people. Please respect my chastity, this is my only treasure, I entrust it to you, please let me keep it, even if it is They didn't take it away."

It is indescribable how Saint-Florent feigned gratitude.He simply didn't know what words to use to express it to me, and we didn't have time to speak.The most important thing is to run for your life.I deftly took out the purse and handed it to him, then hurried through the bushes.We did not lead the horses, for fear that the sound of hooves would wake the group.We hurried up a path that led out of the forest.It was also our luck that we just walked out of the forest at dawn, and there was no one following us.Before ten o'clock in the morning, we reached Luzarches.When we got there, we were in no danger, so we wanted to take a good rest.

There are times in life when you just can't live despite having a lot of money.This is exactly the case at Saint-Florent.He had a check for half a million francs in his purse, but not a single crown in cash.This made him want to enter the inn, but stopped. Seeing his embarrassment, I said: "Don't worry, Monsieur, the gang I left gave me some money, twenty louis, take it, spend it, I beg you, and give the rest to the poor. Either way, I don't want to keep the money I got from killing people again." Saint-Florent pretended to be polite, but he was far from being considerate of others as I imagined. He just didn't want to appear to take away what I offered him.He asked me what my plan was, and said that whatever I wanted, he took it as an unshirkable obligation to realize it, and it was his only wish to be able to repay me.

He kissed my hand, and said: "Terrese, you keep my property and my life! What can I do but give you these two things? Please accept them, please! And ask God to allow marriage to strengthen the ligaments of our friendship." Maybe it was a premonition, maybe it was indifference, I don't know, anyway, I absolutely don't believe that what I did to this young man would arouse his feelings like this.He could tell from the look on my face that I was afraid to say no explicitly.He understands, no longer insist , just asked me what he could do for me. "Monsieur," I said to him, "if you really feel that what I have done is not worthless, and want to repay you, I only ask you to take me to Lyons, and settle me in a decent family. Let my shame never hurt again."

"You have found the right man," said Saint-Florent to me. "No one can serve you better than I. I have about twenty relatives in Lyons." Then the young merchant asked me to explain why I had to leave Paris, the place of my birth, which I had told him, and I told him all this with naivety and confidence. "Oh! if that's all I can do for you without going to Lyons," said the young man, "have nothing to fear, Teresa, your case has been settled, and you are no longer being hunted. I have given you a safer place of refuge than any other. I have a relation near Bundy, and she lives there in a charming country. I am sure she would be more than happy to have you stay with her. I will to-morrow I will introduce you to her."

It was my turn to be grateful to him, and of course I accepted such a suitable arrangement.We spent the rest of the day resting in Luzarches, with the intention of going to Bondy, only six miles away, the next day. "It's a fine day," said Saint-Florent to me, "and if you believe me, Therese, we'll walk to my relative's castle, and when we get there we'll tell her the story of our adventures, I think It will be in your better interest to get there that way." I had not the slightest suspicion of the devil's intentions, nor could I have imagined that his company was any more dangerous than the thugs who had just departed.I agreed with neither concern nor disgust.We had dinner and supper together, and he had no objection at all to me sharing a room alone for the night.According to him, after avoiding the hottest time, it only takes four or five hours to reach his relative's house.So, the next day, we left Luzarches and set off on foot to Bondi. It was about five o'clock in the afternoon when we entered the forest.Saint-Florent has not yet shown his feet, he is still so sincere, and has been proving to me his feelings for me.Even if I were with my dad, I wouldn't feel any safer than I do now.The shadows of night began to spread a religious terror in the woods, which aroused fear in timid hearts and evil plans in murderous ones.We just walk along the path.I'm ahead of the curve, so I look back from time to time and ask St. Florent if these back roads are really the way we should go, if it's possible he's on the wrong track, and if he's really sure we'll be there in no time . "Here we are, bitch!" replied the villain, and at the same time struck me on the head with a stick, knocking me to the ground, unconscious... oh!What the rascal said and did, madam, I no longer know.But looking at myself when I woke up, I couldn't help but understand at once how far I had let him play.When I woke up, it was completely dark.I lie under a tree, away from the road.I'm torn and bloodied... I've lost my virginity! Ma'am.This is how I was rewarded for my good deeds for this harlot! The villain, after playing with me in every way, even in the most offensive ways, robbed me of my money It was the money I had so generously offered to give him before.He tore my clothes, most of them were scattered around me in shreds, I was almost naked and had several wounds on my body.You can imagine my situation, surrounded by darkness, alone, destitute of virginity, hopeless, exposed to all dangers, I would like to end my life at once, if I have a weapon, I'll grab it right away to end a life that will only bring me disaster... I said to myself, "Devil! How have I wronged him? To be treated so cruelly by him! I saved his life and gave him back his money, but he took from me what was most precious! Oh , people, just follow the domination of lust, and commit such a crime! A tiger in the depths of the most desolate wilderness will tremble in fear of your bad deeds.” After the initial pain is stimulated, it lasts for a few minutes. Body and soul burnt, my eyes filled with tears, I turned mechanically and cried out to heaven, my heart ran to the Lord who dwelt in heaven, . The silent sight of nature just around my bewildered mind, .I throw myself at the feet of the Almighty God, the God denied by the blasphemers, the God of hope for the wretched and the suffering. "Holy and majestic Lord!" I cried with tears, "you have filled my heart with the joy of heaven in this dreadful hour, and you have certainly prevented me from ending my life. O my protector and my guide Man, I long for your mercy, beg your mercy, see how miserable I am, how miserable, how patient, how full of prayer! Almighty God! You know that I am innocent and weak, I am Man betrayed and abused. I intended to do good in your image, but your will punished me. Your will was done, O my God! All your holy wills are dear to me and I respect them , and I will complain no more. But if I find nothing but thorns in the world, I beg you to use your power to call me back to you, so that I may pray to you and worship you without trouble, and keep away from these wicked people. Alas! these villains have done me nothing but mischief, and with their bloody, treacherous hands have thrown my wretched days at will into torrents of tears and abysses of pain." Prayer is the warmest consolation of the unfortunate, and grows stronger when it has fulfilled its mission.So I got up, and with great courage, picked up the rags that the harlot had left me, and hid myself in a bush for the night, where the danger would be less.I feel safe now.I had just been close to God and tasted satisfaction, so that I could rest for a few hours in a little security.When I opened my eyes, the sun was already high.For the unlucky, the waking hour is terrifying.The sweetness of sleep revived the imagination quicker, made it more desolate, and brought back all kinds of misery that had only been temporarily forgotten by rest. I asked myself, and said to myself, "Indeed, there are some women who have been reduced by nature to the same fate as the beasts! They hide in their humble houses and escape men like beasts. What is the difference between me and them now? Then, Why should I be born to suffer such a sad fate?..." Thinking of these miserable things, I burst into tears.Before the crying stopped, I heard something around me.Gradually, I could hear two men talking.I listened with bated breath.One of them said: "Come here, dear friend, it's great that we're here! My nasty aunt keeps watch over us ruthlessly! But now she can't keep me from having a little bit of that good pleasure with you." When they approached, they stood very close to me on the opposite side. I heard and saw everything they said and did, so I saw... God!Madame, how has fate always brought me into such ugly situations!Morality cannot permit such a narrative to be heard, nor can shame describe such a scene! This terrible crime is against both nature and social conventions.In a word, this crime is often severely punished by God. Heart of Stone thought it plausible, and suggested to me that my executioner, who had just made my victim, also used it on me when I was unconscious.In short, I have seen with my own eyes this disgusting and repugnant act performed with every sort of sordid artifice and grisly detail that the most thoughtful sensuality can imagine!One of them, the one who dedicated himself, was about twenty-four years old, dressed gorgeously, and his noble status could be seen.Another was about his age and seemed to be his servant.Their behavior was outrageous and prolonged, and even a legal, loving couple fondling each other doesn't feel as crazy as this.The young master propped his hands on top of a small mound opposite the grove where I hid, exposing the sacrilegious altar naked to his servants.The latter, agitated by the sight of it, fondled the idol of his master, and was ready to sacrifice it with a dagger more terrible and gigantic than the dagger with which Bundy's villain threatened me.But the young master didn't seem to be in the least bit afraid, and his idol seemed unafraid of being hurt as he stepped up to the incoming knife, while his servant teased it, prodded it, and kissed it everywhere.Gradually, their enthusiasm diminished... their mouths squeezed against each other, their gasps fused together. well!What a difficult time!I dare not move, for fear of being discovered by them.At last, presumably satisfied, the two criminals who had performed this obscene scene rose to their feet and walked towards what must be their way home. When the master approached the bush that hid me, my hat exposed me, and he saw me. "Jasmine," he said to the servant, "we have been discovered...a girl has seen our secret...you come here and find this bitch for me, we must ask her what she is doing here." I did not let them drag me from my hiding place, but I went out myself and fell at their feet. "Oh, gentlemen!" I cried, stretching out my arms to them, "have pity on me, an unfortunate woman, whose misery is beyond your imagination. No man has gone through as much as I have. Please don't doubt me by finding me in a situation where I'm in a desperate situation through no fault of my own. Please don't add to the misery that is already too much for me, and help me out Forcing my doom, ease my pain!" I fell into the hands of Count Bressac (that was the young master's name).He was so wicked and lecherous that he had very little mercy in his heart.It is a pity that sensuality stifles pity in men.Sensuality makes the heart hard as stone. Firstly, those ugly actions require the numbness of the soul, and secondly, the strong vibration of the whole nervous system caused by this carnal desire weakens the ability to respond. Therefore, a lustful person is rarely a compassionate person. .Besides, besides the natural ruthlessness of the temperaments which I have here described, the Count of Bressac had a deep-seated misogyny, and a deep hatred for all female features, so that I It was difficult to instill in him the emotion I hoped to arouse. "Turtledove in the woods," said the Count grimly to me, "if you want to deceive, go to someone else. My friends and I will never sacrifice to the filthy temple of women. If you beg for alms, go to Find the benevolent people, we never do that kind of thing... But, you bitch, did you see what happened between this gentleman and me?" I quickly replied, "I saw you talking on the grass, that's all, sir, I promise!" "I would like to believe that it is for your own good," said the young count, "that if I had known what else you might see, you would never have come out of this wood! . . . It is still early, Jasmine, and we have time to hear her adventures, and then we'll see what to do with her." The two young men sat down and ordered me to sit next to them.Then, naively, I told them all the disasters I had suffered since I was born. As soon as I had finished, Count Bressac stood up and said, "Come, Jasmine, let us be just one time. Themis, who is just and impartial, decrees that this little thing must perish, and we must not allow the will of the goddess to be overthrown." Trampled mercilessly, let this female prisoner accept the death sentence she must have endured! This small murder is not a crime at all, but a correction of the moral atmosphere. Since we sometimes have the misfortune to destroy the moral order, we should at least in the opportunity Bravely make up for it when it comes..." These two cruel creatures picked me up from the ground and dragged me into the woods, laughing at my cries and shouts. "Let's tie her hands and feet to four trees to form a square." Brisac ordered while stripping me of my clothes. Then they fastened me up with tie, handkerchief, and garter for rope, just as they had designed it, that is to say, in the most cruel and painful manner imaginable.The pain I suffered is indescribable. I just felt that my limbs were torn apart, my stomach was twisted, and I fell straight to the ground due to my own weight.Sweat drips from my brow, I just ① The goddess of law and justice in Greek mythology. —— Annotation It is because of the heart-piercing pain that I can live.If the pain no longer controls my nerves, I will see death come in an instant.The thugs amused myself by this posture, applauding and watching carefully. Bressac finally spoke up: "I've seen enough, and I've decided to just give her a little scare this time." He unfastened my hands and feet, ordered me to get dressed, and continued, "Tyrese, don't Get out and come with us. As long as you obey, you will have nothing to regret. My aunt needs to find another maid, and I will introduce you to her. If I believe your story, I can vouch for you. Be well behaved. But if you go against my good intentions, my trust, or my will, look at these four trees, Teres, look at this place between them, there will be It's your cemetery. You have to remember that this place is only one mile away from the castle I took you to, and if you make the slightest mistake, you will be brought here again immediately." I immediately forgot the suffering I had suffered, threw myself at the earl's feet, cried and swore to him that I would do what he wanted.But he was as indifferent to my joy as to my pain, saying only: "Let's go! What happens in the future depends entirely on your own behavior, and you decide your own destiny." Let's go forward.Jasmine chatted with his master in a low voice, and I followed behind obediently without saying a word.About an hour later, we came to the castle of the Marchioness of Bressac.The majesty of the castle and the multitude of servants in it made me feel that whatever job I could do here would be better than being a maid at M. Duarpin's house.They made me wait in a house, and Jasmine brought me food for me to eat.The young count went into the Marchioness's room to report to her, and half an hour later he called me himself, and presented me to his aunt. The Marchioness of Bressac was about forty-six, and still very pretty.Despite her principles and her harsh words, I still found her to be upright and compassionate.The young earl's uncle married her with nothing but a title of nobility.She has been a widow for two years now.All that Mr. Bressac could count on depended on this aunt, and the money he received from his father was just enough to cover his eating, drinking, and pleasures.Mrs. Bressac also gave him a handsome allowance, but it was not enough.The Earl valued nothing more than sensual enjoyment, and his lusts, perhaps less expensive than others, were far too frequent.The family has an annuity of 50,000 crowns, and Mr. Brisac is still single.There was no way for him to make up his mind to serve in the military. He couldn't stand anything that required him to give up his sexual pleasures. He would never accept such shackles.The Marchioness lives in this domain for three months every year, and spends the rest of her days in Paris.The three months she had asked her nephew to spend with her were torture to the young man, and he hated his aunt, thinking that every moment away from Paris, the center of his pleasures, was a waste of time. The young count ordered me to repeat to the Marchioness what I had told him, and when I had finished, Madame de Bressac said to me: "Your honesty and naivety do not allow me to doubt what you say. About you , I just want to know if you are the daughter of the man you told me about. If it is true, then I know your father, which adds another reason for me to care about you. As for what happened at the Du Alpin's I'm going to go to the justice's house twice to get it sorted. The justice is my friend for decades. He's the most perfect man in the world. Just prove to him you're innocent, That removes all odds against you. But think about it, Tyrese, I promise you all this on the condition that you behave well, so, you see, I ask you to express my gratitude, and the result is It's all for your own good." I knelt at the Marchioness's feet, and assuring her that I had behaved to her satisfaction, she kindly lifted me up, and at once made me her second maid. Madame Bressac inquired about me from Paris, and within two days I heard back, exactly as I had hoped.The Marchioness praised me for not deceiving her at all, and at last all anxious thoughts were banished from my mind, and I hoped, and exhausted my imagination, in anticipation of the sweetest consolation to come.However, God did not arrange it this way. Poor Teresa has not been happy since then. If she is allowed to have a moment of peace, it is only to make her suffer from the ensuing disasters more bitter and unbearable. As soon as we got back to Paris, Madame Bressac was in a hurry to attend to me.The presiding judge consented to receive me, and he listened with interest to my account of my misfortune.Dualpin's slander against me was cleared, but he could not be brought to justice, because he managed to make several fake bills, ruined three or four families, made a profit of nearly two million, and went to England .As for the arson case at the Judicial Prison, they decided that, if it had done me any good, at least I had had no part in it, and the case was over.They reassured me that the judges handling the case saw no further formality to be required.I know these things, I am satisfied with what they say to me, and you will soon find out if I am wrong. It is easy to imagine how grateful I was to Mrs. Bressack for this, and besides, hadn't she been so considerate and kind to me?How can such circumstances not make me cling forever to such a precious protector? But the young earl's intention was far from linking me so closely to his aunt... Now, to describe to you It's time to take a look at this devil. Mr. Bressac had one of the most seductive faces and youthful charm.If there was anything wrong with his posture and facial expression, it was that they were a little too lazy and soft, that is, the kind of softness and delicacy that only women have.It seems that nature has endowed him with these feminine qualities, and at the same time has given him a woman's taste... But what a sinister soul is under the cover of all these femininity! Never was he more vicious, more vindictive, more cruel, more irreligious, more lascivious, more scornful of all duties, but especially those of which Nature seems to have us fully enjoy our pleasures.Of all Mr. Bressac's vices the worst was that of his aunt. hate.The Marchioness tried every means to bring her nephew back to the moral path.Perhaps she was too severe, and in the end it was this severity which aggravated the Count's passions, and he indulged his vicious tastes more frantically.All that the poor Marchioness got out of her nephew's strict discipline was the latter's greater hatred. "Don't think," the Earl often said to me, "that everything my aunt does for you is voluntary, Therese. Believe me, if I hadn't urged her at all times, she would hardly remember her promise to you." What. She wants you to appreciate everything she does, which I did. Yes, Therese, yes, I'm the only one you should be grateful for. You should feel that I'm totally selfless, because no matter How beautiful you are, you know very well, and I have no desire to please you. Tyrese, I expect a different kind of reward from you. When you are convinced of all that I have done to make your life safe, I hope to find in your heart what I have a right to expect." I find it difficult to understand his words, and I don't know how to answer them.But I still answered a few words casually, perhaps too hastily.Do I need to admit it to you? Well, yes, it would be a breach of your trust to conceal my fault from you, and I am extremely sorry for your concern for my misfortune.So, madam, I ask you to listen to me about the only mistake for which I deeply blame myself.oh!No, how can it be called a mistake? It is stupid, it is ridiculous, it has never been done before.But at least it wasn't a crime, it was just punishing myself for a mistake that a just God must have used to throw me into the abyss that soon opened up beneath my feet.However cruel the Count of Bressac had done to me, from the first day I met him I felt an irresistible impulse of love which drew my heart to him.No matter how much I mulled over his cruelty, his unfeminine nature, the depravity of his tastes, the moral distance that lay between us, nothing in the world could quench this nascent passion.If he wants my life, I will give it to him a thousand times.He could never have imagined me harboring such emotions.This grim man has not the slightest desire to inquire into why I cry every day, but it is still impossible for him not to see that I am eager to run to please anything that pleases him, and it is impossible for him not to feel at all how much I am Attentive and ingratiating.I must have been too blind to cater to him to the extent that I was ashamed to allow him to serve his mistakes, which I did my best to conceal from his aunt.In a sense, my behavior has won his trust in me. Everything from him is so precious to me. I am still blind, and sometimes I am so weak that I am confident that he is not completely to me. nonchalant.However, his excessive debauchery made me wake up soon!The bohemian life even made his health worse day by day.I sometimes ventured to persuade him of the evils of his conduct, and he listened without showing any resentment, but at last told me that it was impossible to change the vices he so cherished. He said to me one day, just in the heat of enthusiasm, "Oh, Therese, you don't understand the charm of my inclination, and the warm pleasure it gives me to fantasize that I've become a woman! It's an unbelievable confusion of minds! We hate women and yet want to imitate them! How nice it is to be a woman! Tyrese, how wonderful it is to be a whore to everyone who wants you! In the same day , being the mistress of a thief, a marquis, a servant, and a monk in succession, being loved, caressed, envied, threatened, beaten by them in turn, now lying in their arms triumphantly, now being trampled under their feet , keep them affectionate with caresses, and rekindle their passions with madness... Oh! No, no, Therese, a mind as constructed as yours would not understand such pleasures. Morality aside, though, You can't even imagine the physical enjoyment of such a divine hobby! Impossible to contend with, it was such a strong tickle, such a tickle of thrilling pleasure... We lost Rationality, loss of mind. Kissing thousands of times, one more intimacy, but not crazy enough, partners make us intoxicated, but not yet to the extreme. Being hugged tightly by partners, lips are biting each other, longing to If we have anything to complain about, that our whole body melts into his, that we just want to be one with him, it's that we're being ignored. Tyrese, don't think we're made of the same structure as other men. We The structure of your body is quite different, the membrane that covers your body, God created us and adorns the altar of our amorous lover's sacrifice. We are therefore also women, just as you are in the temple of reproduction We play the same role as women. You enjoy all the pleasures we do not enjoy, and there are none that we do not know how to enjoy. Not only that, but we have other pleasures, which is the wonderful synthesis, and it is this wonderful combination that prevents us from correcting ourselves. that makes us passionate and crazy people, even if stupid people want to punish us! . Thus the Count made his wicked assertion.我应该试着向他谈谈给了他一切的人和这种淫乱给他那位令人尊敬的婶娘带来的忧伤吗？在他身上我只发现了轻蔑与任性，特别是发现了他认为本应该属于他的财产长期掌握在别人手中那种焦急的心情。我只看到了对这位如此正直的女人的最根深蒂固的憎恨，对一切自然的感情最明显的反叛。 有时我还利用宗教为手段，我一向从宗教得到慰藉，便想把宗教的温柔情绪植入他那腐朽的灵魂。我深信，如果我成功地使他分享了宗教的魅力，我差不多可以肯定宗教的羁绊可以控制住他。但是，伯爵根本不让我长久使用这种武器。勃瑞萨克先生公然与我们最神圣的教义为敌，顽固地藐视我们教义的纯洁性，激烈仇恨最高存在物的存在。他不但不容许我让他改变，反而试图腐蚀我。 他对我说，“一切宗教都是出自一个虚假的原则，泰瑞丝，它们都假设必须崇拜某一创造主，但是，这个造物主是从来不存在的。在这方面，请你想一想那个绰号为铁石心肠的人的理智的信条。泰瑞丝，你对我说过，说他和我一样也曾经诱导你的灵魂。实际上，这个男人的原则是再正确不过的了，人们愚蠢地迫使他处于下贱的地位并没有剥夺他正确思想的权利。” “如果自然的所有产品都是顺从自然规律产生的结果，如果自然的永恒的作用和反作用意味着本质所必需的运动的话，那么，傻瓜们顶礼膜拜的那个至高无上的主又有什么存在的必要呢？亲爱的姑娘，这些就是你那位贤明的导师教导你的。依据这样的说法，宗教是什么呢？不是强者企图制服弱者的限制，又是什么呢？充满这种意图的强者才敢于对他要支配的弱者说：上帝炮制出枷锁，他出于残酷的本性用它来束缚弱者，弱者因贫困而愚钝，不加分辨便相信了强者意欲的一切。从这些欺骗中产生的宗教值得去尊重吗？泰瑞丝，有哪种宗教不带着欺骗和荒谬的标记吗？我在所有的宗教之中看到的是什么呢？是使理智发抖的教义，是违反自然的教条，是只是使人觉得可笑、厌恶的荒谬仪式。然而，如果说所有宗教中有那么一个特别应该轻蔑、仇恨的，难道不是我们生在其中的有着野蛮教义的基督教吗？还有更令人厌恶的宗教吗？……还有更能引起公愤的街头卖艺的人吗？一个妓女和一个大兵在宇宙中的一个最不起眼的角落生下的患麻疯病的犹太人，竟敢自称是创造世界者的使者！泰雷丝，你不得不承认，至少总得有个什么证据吧?这个荒唐可笑的使者有什么证据呢?他怎能证明自己载负着使命呢?地球会改变面貌？危害地球的灾难会消除？太阳将昼夜照耀?罪恶将不再玷污大地?我们将会看到地球上只存在着幸福？……都不能!上帝的使者是通过变戏法的花招、耍弄的手段和双关语来向世界宣布他的到来的。上帝的使者是在由小工、手工艺人和妓女等那可敬的一群人中间来表现他的伟大的。上帝的朋友，甚至上帝本人是在与一些人喝得酩酊大醉、与另一些人睡觉的同时，使怙恶不俊的罪犯屈从于他的法律的。这个无赖为了上演他的闹剧，只发明那些能够满足他的情欲与食欲的东西，并以此来证明自己肩负着使命。无论如何，反正他还是发迹了，少数几个卑顺的仆从附和这混蛋，就此组成了一个教派。这个小人宣扬的教条诱惑了少数犹太人。犹太人本是罗马人的奴隶，便欣喜万分，拥抱这个宗教，但这个宗教虽然打开了他们的锁链，却又使他们屈从于这个宗教的限制。他们的动机被识破，他们的不服管教被揭发，叛乱分子被逮捕，他们的首领灭亡了，其实他那种死法比起他那些罪行来说还是太微不足道了。并且，出于不可原谅的考虑不周，人们听任这个粗野的人的门徒到处散布，没有把他们同他一起斩首示众。狂热崇拜占据了人们的思想，女人们叫喊，疯子们手舞足蹈，傻子们相信，这样他就是与其父一样的上帝的儿子。这就是他的全部神圣的梦想、他的变成教义的全部言论、他的愚笨的教义！伟大的上帝，听从神父的意愿，掩盖了谎言和罪恶的荒谬外衣，自贬身价，直至每天早晨降低为一块面团，由信徒们吃掉、消化掉，很快在他们的肠子深处变成最下贱的排泄物，这样做却可满足神父这孝顺的儿子、宣扬这样骇人听闻消息的卑鄙小人花天酒地之用。上帝说了，他也必须这样说，他说：'这块面包就是我的肉，你们把它消化掉，上帝就被你们消化掉了，天与地的创造者将因此发生变化，我将变成从人体中排出的最无价值的物质。我也希望能被你们吃掉，因为上帝仁慈且至高无上。 '可是，这些荒谬的言论却扩展开来，人们认为扩展的原因是因为这些言论是现实的、伟大的、崇高的，是因为创造这些言论的人是强大的。其实，这种现象存在的背后掩盖着极其简单的道理，错误只在骗子与傻瓜中得到了信任。噢，泰瑞丝，这些原因对一个审慎的、哲学的头脑来说该是多么滑稽可笑啊？明智的人在这一大堆可怕的无稽之谈中只看了某些人的欺骗和更多的人虚假的相信。假如上帝希望我们信仰某个宗教，并且这个宗教确确实实是强大无比的；或者，说得更直接一些，倘若确实存在着一个上帝，那么他怎会用如此荒谬的方法来向我们传达他的命令呢？他有怎会通过一个可鄙的强盗的肌体来向我们表明如何为他服务呢？倘若他真是至高无上的、强大无比的、正确无误的、仁慈善良的，那你对我说起的这个上帝，他怎会通过谜语和闹剧来教会我为他服务并且了解他呢？oh!不，泰瑞丝，不，我宁愿去死一千次也不愿相信这些东西。当无神论需要有人作出牺牲时，请尽管说出来，我的鲜血已经准备好了。憎恶这些可怕的东西吧，泰瑞丝，用你最明显的冒犯来加强对它们本应得到的蔑视……我刚一出世，我就憎恶这些粗俗的梦想。从那时候起，我就下定了决心：将它们踩在脚下，并且发誓决不听信这些谎言。如果你希望成为幸福的人，就照我的样子去做，像我一样憎恨、弃绝、亵渎这种可怕的崇拜、这个令人厌恶的偶像及其这种崇拜本身。这种崇拜是出于幻想而发明创造的，所以，也和幻想一样，被一切聪明的人所轻蔑。 " “噢！先生，”我哭着回答，“如果您想毁灭我心中给我慰藉的这个宗教，您就剥夺了我最美好的希望。我坚定不移地坚持它所教导的一切，绝对深信对它的一切污蔑都是放荡和欲情的结果，您的亵渎和诡辩令我惊骇，会使我内心极其珍视的理念、我心中最甜美的粮食荡然无存。” 我接着又讲了许许多多道理，但只能使伯爵发笑。每天他都施展他那刚健有力的雄辩， 以我幸亏从来没有读过的书本为依据。他的原则每天都向我的原则进攻，但是从没有动摇它们。乐善好施、笃信宗教的勃瑞萨克夫人并非不知道侄儿每日大发谬论，坚持歪门邪道，为此她常常对我唉声叹气。因为她觉得我比其他女人还稍许多一些见识，所以愿意向我透露她的忧虑。 但是，她的侄子对她已经无所畏惧了，伯爵甚至已经不再掩饰自己的恶劣行径。他不仅让那些满足他淫欲的下流恶棍们出现在她的周围，甚至还胆大包天地当着我的面宣称：要是她胆敢继续阻碍他的嗜好，他就要让她亲眼观赏这样的纵欲是多么其乐无穷。 我整日痛苦呻吟，这种行为使我感到可怕。我试图排除个人的原因，以便熄灭燃烧我心灵的对他的爱恋之情，然而，爱情岂是能够治愈的疾病?我竭力抗拒这种欲情，结果只是燃烧起更炽热的火焰，我眼前越目睹本该使我痛恨他的景象，而他在我看来反倒愈加。