Chapter 62 third quarter

In May 1912, Cai Yuanpei, the chief education officer of the Provisional Government of the Republic of China and also from Shaoxing, invited Lu Xun to work in the Ministry of Education.At that time, the president of the provisional government was replaced by Yuan Shikai from Sun Yat-sen, and the capital had been moved from Nanjing to Beijing.Lu Xun went to Beijing and started his life for fourteen years. During the first seven years in Beijing, Lu Xun lived alone; Zhu An devoted himself to serving Zhou's old lady Lu Rui in his hometown of Shaoxing.The marriage and family life of the two parties was desolate.

In November 1919, when Lu Xun's economic conditions were relatively affluent, he bought a yard at No. 11, Badaowan, a public warehouse in Xizhimen, Beijing, at a cost of 3,500 yuan.The era of the Beiyang government was one of the eras when the salaries of civil servants were the highest. Comrade Zhou Shuren, a member of the Department of Social Education and Chief of the First Section of the Ministry of Education, was in charge of libraries, museums, art galleries and other matters. From 1913 to 1922, his annual salary income was 2 Between 1,500 and 3,900 yuan. The No. 11 Badaowan Hutong, which has three courtyards, moved Lu Xun's family in Shaoxing to Beijing.Lu Xun lived in the dark and damp middle courtyard by himself, his mother and Zhu An lived in the front yard, and his eldest brother Zhou Zuoren, younger siblings Yu Taixinzi, and second brother Zhou Jianren lived in the back yard.

The whole family was reunited, and Lu Xun was gradually gaining popularity at that time, but he was not in a good mood: because Zhu An also came. In the past, Lu Xun and Zhu An avoided each other. Although they were named husband and wife, they were not actually husband and wife, so they gave each other peace.Now under one roof, conflicts can no longer be avoided. After thirteen years of marriage, Zhu An not only did not have a basic married life with Lu Xun, but he hardly even got a smile from Lu Xun.Apart from serving her mother-in-law Lu Rui every day, she didn't know how to deal with her poor marriage. She felt that her husband and herself were people from two worlds.In 1919, Lu Xun finally allowed her to move to Beijing, and she immediately had hope in her heart. She went to the capital to reunite with her husband who was a "Beijing official", which restored her face in her natal family and in the local area.

However, the long thirteen years did not change Lu Xun's indifferent attitude towards her.Lu Xun knew very sadly that this woman who was inserted into his life out of thin air because of his mother ruined the life he longed for and lifelong happiness; despite all his modern ideas, he could only accept this reality helplessly.Seeing Zhu An was like seeing the source of my own misfortune. The days in Badaowan were like a nightmare for Zhu An.Zhu An is good at cooking and can cook delicious and authentic Shaoxing dishes, but Lu Xun often does not eat the dishes she cooks, and only reluctantly eats a few bites because his mother is at the table; Lu Xun does not even try the clothes Zhu An made for Lu Xun. After trying it, he threw it aside. Zhu An didn't dare to hand it over to him later, so he just put the sewn cotton trousers on Lu Xun's bed, hoping that he would put them on casually, but Lu Xun saw them and threw them into the yard; even Zhu An When I went to Lu Xun's room to spread the quilt for him, he also found fault and lost his temper, shaking the quilt to the ground and tearing down the bed...

Zhu An is gentle and docile by nature, and has gotten used to Lu Xun's attitude towards her over the years.In front of Lu Xun, she also had a deep inferiority complex. Watching Lu Xun communicate and talk with the cultural celebrities and young students at that time, she really felt that this man was completely different from the people and life she was familiar with.Apart from lamenting her bad fate, she has no resentment towards Lu Xun and maintains the family's superficial peace. But she was married to Lu Xun in a dignified manner, and she was the authentic Mrs. Lu Xun. She worked hard to serve her mother-in-law, and she really regarded herself as the Zhou family.Therefore, she will also pose as a housewife in front of outsiders. For example, when some students come to visit Lu Xun and talk in the living room, she will smile and hold fruit snacks, and then get full of sweetness when the students call her "teacher". Although she knew that Lu Xun was very tired of her appearance.

Zhu An's biggest dream is that her husband Lu Xun can accept her and become a normal couple with Lu Xun.She wanted to get close to Lu Xun, but she didn't know how to get close.When Lu Xun was in a good mood, he also chatted with her.Once when Lu Xun mentioned a certain food, he said it was very delicious; Zhu An, who was flattered, quickly said, yes, yes, I have eaten it too, it is really delicious!Unexpectedly, Lu Xun's face immediately sank: because he ate this kind of food in Japan, not in China.Her teasing made Lu Xun even more disgusted. Lu Rui saw that Lu Xun had no children for so many years after marriage, and she really wanted to see Lu Xun's children running around in front of her, so she couldn't help complaining to Zhu An.Zhu An said aggrievedly: "Mr. Da doesn't approach me at all, how can a child come out?"

As early as 1914, Zhu An knew that he had no hope of giving birth to Lu Xun's flesh and blood, so he asked his younger brother to write to Lu Xun, suggesting that Lu Xun take a concubine.Lu Xun was very annoyed by this claim, and denounced it in his diary as "quite absurd", that is, quite absurd.For Zhu An, this is "virtuous" who "considers the overall situation", but it is completely different from Lu Xun's ideology.The distance between the two cannot be shortened for life. However, although Lu Xun was indifferent to Zhu An, he was never vicious.Lu Xun kept sending money to Zhu An's family; when Zhu An fell ill, Lu Xun immediately sent her to the hospital and helped her get on and off the rickshaw. The foreign doctors who saw this scene were also very moved.

In the summer of 1923, the most important event in Lu Xun's family affairs happened. This was the estrangement of the Zhou brothers that I will talk about later--from then on, Zhou Shuren and Zhou Zuoren basically cut off all contact. Lu Xun decided to move out of the courtyard he bought, and he asked Zhu An: Do you want to stay or go back to your natal family?This choice is too cruel for Zhu An: Zhou Zuoren has become enemies with his eldest brother, why should he keep his sister-in-law?And going back to her natal family in that era only meant being abandoned by her husband, which was an extremely shameless thing for a woman.

So Zhu An begged to move with Lu Xun, saying that you always need someone to take care of you.Lu Xun also considered her situation, and although he was reluctant, he agreed. On August 2, 1923, Zhu An followed Lu Xun and moved into Zhuanta Hutong.The life after that was even more embarrassing, because there used to be an old lady between the two of them, but now Lu Rui only occasionally walks from Badaowan Hutong, and only the two of them are left with their eyes facing each other, and the atmosphere is even more tense.In order to reduce meetings, they arranged two boxes, one for laundry and the other for clean clothes.Lu Xun put the clothes to be washed in one box for Zhu An to wash, and then took Zhu An's washed clothes in another box.

All Zhu An's efforts were in vain.In the end, it was the appearance of Xu Guangping that made her completely desperate for her marriage with Lu Xun. Unlike Zhu An, Lu Xun's original wife who was kept taboo for a period of time by later generations, the teacher-student relationship between Lu Xun and Xu Guangping was spread as a good story.Xu Guangping is not very beautiful, but she is extremely talented and individual; especially, Xu Guangping came to Beijing to study to escape an arranged marriage. The appearance of Xu Guangping in Lu Xun's life was another disaster for Zhu An.Originally, although Lu Xun was indifferent to her, he never had other women outside. Although this made Zhu An feel strange, she was also very relieved and satisfied; but the appearance of Xu Guangping brought an unprecedented crisis to her life: the housewife's Her status could not be kept, and her nominal husband would also be taken away.

In the summer of 1925, when the relationship between Lu Xun and Xu Guangping became clear, Zhu An couldn't hold on any longer and was seriously ill and hospitalized.Lu Xun sent her to the hospital and discussed her condition with the doctor, but he seldom stayed in front of the hospital bed.His heart was completely occupied by Xu Guangping, he said: "It turns out that I can love too." Intellectually, Lu Xun didn't know that Zhu An was also a victim. She was a kind and docile ordinary woman, and it was fate to marry him; he had planned to ruin his happiness because of Zhu An.In "Sui Gan Lu Forty", Lu Xun said: "On the side of women, there was no crime at first, but now it is a sacrifice of old habits. Since we are conscious of human morality,... we cannot blame the opposite sex, so we have to accompany By making sacrifices for the whole life, the old account of four thousand years has been completed." Now with Xu Guangping, Lu Xun suddenly found that there was a turning point in his life, especially -- his desire for love had not been extinguished. Zhu An made himself feel like a dry well and had no illusions about real life. Germination of vitality.So he said: "It turns out that I can also love." Lu Xun is extremely deep, but such personal emotional experience is still vaguely reflected in Lu Xun's creations. Lu Xun has a short story, which is his only novel about love.The work tells the story of a man and a woman who fell in love and lived together overcoming difficulties, but were forced to separate due to the pressure of life.People tend to interpret its theme as "love must be attached to it, otherwise it will not be able to withstand the wear and tear of real life". However, Dr. Wang Weidong, an associate professor at Soochow University and my class teacher when I was studying in Anqing, found that this text is split: The hero of the novel, Juan Sheng, appeared as a strong confessor at the beginning, but then he began to defend himself, and his defense became more plausible in the end.He believes that Juansheng has a shadow of Lu Xun, and his confession was sent by Lu Xun to his ex-wife Zhu An; Juansheng's defense is actually Lu Xun's self-defense, and he is also a victim of this tragic marriage. On August 26, 1926, Lu Xun left Beijing to go to Xiamen University; in October 1927, he and Xu Guangping lived together in Shanghai; in May 1929, Lu Xun returned to Beijing (now renamed Beiping) to visit his mother and told his mother and friends that Xu Guangping had died. pregnant. In fact, Zhu An's "Mrs. Lu Xun" career has come to an end.Knowing all this, she said helplessly: "I am like a snail, climbing up from the bottom of the wall bit by bit. Although I climb slowly, I will climb to the top of the wall one day. But now I have no There is a way, I don’t have the strength to climb anymore, no matter how nice I am to him, it’s useless. It seems that I will only serve the empress (referring to Lu Rui) in this life. In case the empress returns to the west, judging from Mr. , he will take care of my future life." Because of Zhu An's gentleness and Xu Guangping's generosity, Zhu An and Xu Guangping got along very well, and Xu Guangping respectfully called her his teacher's mother.It's just that Zhu An's unavoidable concepts and ways of doing things conflict with Xu Guangping's, and he is slightly unhappy in some specific matters.For example, when Zhou Haiying was born, Zhu An was also happy; when Zhou Haiying was sick, Zhu An was very anxious and said that he wanted to take the child with him to raise him, but Xu Guangping was not very happy: This does not mean that Zhu An is the eldest wife, she is Second room?