Chapter 81 Mourning Jin Yi

I wrote the title of this essay, and my tears suddenly fell on the paper.Jin Yi!I, your "big sister", will come to write an article in memory of you. Isn't this an extremely unfortunate thing?Jin Yi, you died too early! On the day of October Revolution, I was in the middle of two meetings, coming home to change clothes, and on my desk, someone left a note saying: "We have come to tell you some sad news: Comrade Jin Yi died of a heart attack in Shanghai at 00:16 today..." I read it quickly under the light, and my whole body shook. On the car going to the city, my palm was still tightly pressed. Holding this piece of paper, the image of a pot of fire that you have given me in the past twenty years is spinning in my mind.

You treat me like a big sister, and I treat my little brother like a big sister, and rarely praise you in person.But what a warm, upright, and honest young man you are! When I say youth, I think of the scene when we first met: more than 20 years ago, you and Ba Jin came to see me together; you may not remember, it was an early summer morning, and there was an altar on my table. A vase of bright red roses, you sit in a chair by the table, facing the sunlight pouring in through the window.Like roses, your face is also flushed red, with big energetic eyes with double eyelids, overflowing with enthusiasm and honest brilliance.

In the past twenty years, I have seen you constantly, and your face is always flushed.Your conversations are always enthusiastic, always on fire and vigorously upward. After liberation, your enthusiasm became more intense, and you felt your own happiness from the bottom of your heart.You walked into "every corner of the motherland", drilled among the "heroes who smashed mountains and seas", approached them, and sang to them. You sang from night to dawn, singing endless hymns of happiness and enthusiasm! The collection of essays you gave me——"A Thousand Miles of Rivers and Mountains" stands on the bookshelf within my reach. It often reminds me: "Look at how fast and far my little brother runs. You, be a bigger brother!" Sister, don’t you hurry up and catch up?”

Just a few nights ago, I was perusing the essay you published in the November issue of "People's Literature" under the lamp: "Follow the Old Horse".The last paragraph, read to make my heart beat!You write about Lao Ma: "His face is flushed, just like the rising sun; his eyes are shining with youthful brilliance." Isn't this exactly your own portrayal? You wrote again: "He held my hand tightly, which made me deeply feel his joy and boundless strength. I was also very excited, and I didn't know what to say to him. I should have comforted him. He said a few words, let him work hard for a few years, take care of his body, don't be too tired, don't run too fast, so as not to be out of breath..." I haven't heard that you were tired during the latest labor. Are you "out of breath" and sent to the hospital for emergency treatment?What you say to yourself is not "take care of your body so that you don't get too tired", but: "You run...as long as we run with the party, our party will never make mistakes and never get tired!"

Jin Yi, I believe that when your heart stops beating, you will not and will not feel tired, but feel full of happiness! This summer, you, who have "followed the party" for many years, were honorably accepted into the great team.When I saw the obituary issued for you, at the end of many of your job titles, there was the words "probationary member of the Communist Party of China", how happy the big sister is for you, and how ashamed! You always encourage me—remember that was the preparation period, one winter morning, a car drove up to my door like a whirlwind, and you rolled up the stairs like a whirlwind, wearing a A new fur coat.I laughed and said, "Okay, this fur coat brings me a room full of heat!" You smiled and said, "I'm going to the Soviet Union, this is part of the luggage - tell you, we're going to do a There’s a new literary publication, and that’s the name, do you have any objections to the name? You want to write an article for this publication, that’s why I’m here.”

Afterwards, in the spring of 1957, the morning after I arrived in Shanghai, the phone on the desk rang, and it was your voice again!You welcome me to Shanghai, you want to take me to visit the Lu Xun Memorial Hall, to visit the Temple of the City God, to eat, to buy candy... Finally, you want me to write an article for you.What a great day we had!We wandered under the portrait of Lu Xun and talked about many stories about him during his lifetime.I have forgotten the name of the small restaurant you often go to in the Chenghuang Temple, but we sat crowded among many laborers, on a small white wooden table, we ate so deliciously!When it comes to writing articles, I have failed your expectations. I have written too little and too badly!

I often think that once a person passes middle age, he will inevitably get "unfortunate news" about his friends. At the end of October last year, on the stage of the Moscow Music Building, Ba Jin, who was sitting next to me, suddenly spoke to me in a low voice. I said: "Don't be sad, let me tell you some sad news, Zhenduo's plane had an accident!" At the end of last year, when I was at home in Beijing, Wu Xiaoling called early in the morning and said, "Don't be sad, let me tell you something. Unfortunately, Mr. Luo Xintian passed away yesterday afternoon!"

How can I not be sad?A warm, honest and honest friend is the most precious asset in life.If one is lost, one will be lost forever. Although we can continue to make new friends, our old friends, each of them, has their own place in our hearts, and no one else can replace them! Don't worry, Jin Yi, in the era when everyone leaps forward together, there are always people singing hymns, and the singing team will become bigger and bigger, and the singing voice will become louder and louder.I, your big sister, will never "fake it" again. Although my voice is not good, I will always learn to sing and sing loudly forever! The night of November 9, 1959