Chapter 25 Yi Shumin

The non-problematic illness shuts me, a mental body that does not feel pain, in a silent valley.There is no moaning or worrying, which makes me take care of myself a little. The whole day is spent only in seclusion and looking at the mountains. One hundred and fifty days of looking at the mountains, I couldn't see any pictures.I listened to the birdsong in spring, until I couldn't hear the music.The bright moon and clear wind have become commonplace.People who are indifferent to the love of the world want to escape from the outside world; but what should people do if they are indifferent to the "love outside the world"?

At this time, I was just like standing at the entrance of a cave, looking at the sticky sea waves, my mind melted into the vast and vast sea and sky, and I felt astonished in my confusion.I didn't know that this long period of concentrating made my mind filter into such emptiness.If you are a "person", you should have "personnel affairs". This empty heart is the scene among immortals and ghosts!Not some "personnel" Come and suppress this frail body, the waves of the ocean will roll up happily and carry me to the bottom of the blue and green abyss. Turning around in a hurry, I saw layers of dome-shaped caves, overlapping endlessly with smaller circles.These circles of deep marks, some of which I like in retrospect, some make me sad...

How tasteless?The monotonous environment and the leisurely days make my mind submerged and introverted day by day. I have no other thoughts except memories. Fortunately, there are more joys and less sorrows. ——But when I recalled Shumin, it was an exception! The emotions in middle school are like a bird trying its wings, like a flower blooming, and I feel that friendship is the supreme joy.Shumin and I met at that time, although we are not the best of friends. The first time I saw her was in the music classroom. A classmate took me to her and said, "You are Rui's friend, and she is also Rui's friend. You are joint friends!" At that time, I was also shy. , she was also shy, and only said a few words vaguely.

Since then, I have walked on the Huajian grassland more than once, and I don't have any deep memories.Only once, she had something to advise me, but she refused to say it to my face.Pulled me out for a walk, but stuffed a piece of paper in my hand.I went to the classroom to unfold it and was horrified. From then on, I regarded her as my friend.This is one of her hidden virtues, but unfortunately, now only I, who is sick, know about it! We are not together day and night, everything is extremely vague.The clearest thing is last year.In the fifth year after we left middle school, we met again in college.The homework is different, so the time spent together is naturally less. Seeing that my friendship is getting weaker day by day, I never spared time to find her.Once in the library, a classmate smiled and said to me, "We asked Shumin, 'How are you and Wanying.' She shook her head and smiled, 'Come on, come on, I dare not mess with her as a college student!'" I laughed too. , I just think she is childish.

——In the library again the next day, she was reading a newspaper, and I was looking for a piece of paper, but I couldn’t find it. I asked, “I’m sorry, Shumin, did you see my piece of paper?” She looked up and smiled, and said: "No." I said, "You pick up the newspaper, maybe it's under it." She picked up the newspaper, and sure enough, she found the paper.I knew she didn't hide it, but I said on purpose: "You must have hidden it, so I can find it easily!"——This was the first and last conversation we had in college, except for the hasty greeting. Because she said "Don't dare to provoke college students", I was afraid that there was something in my expression that might make her feel alienated.However, time passes by like water after all, and the childlike innocence is gone forever. Although I try my best to laugh, the situation is not the same as before.Sitting in silence for a while, I tried to think back to the naive time five years ago.Talking is not allowed in the library, and I don't want to talk, my heart is suddenly filled with sadness of lost enthusiasm!

One day when I came back from the boys' school to the girls' school, I met Yun at the door, and I asked her where she was going, and she said, "Go to see Shumin in Prince Yu's Mansion." I wondered, "Is she sick?—Say hello for me." I thought one disaster and two illnesses are common to people, and I didn't take this matter to heart. The next day, in the girls’ lounge of the boys’ school, a classmate told me sadly, “Shumin is dead!” I suddenly shivered, and went to the window, looking out at the sky like ink, I was silent... Her life, in my eyes, is just these things!

Many classmates cried, but I never shed a tear.I never went to a funeral. On the way back from Tongren Hospital, I met many classmates who came back from the funeral and sighed with their heads bowed. The classmates who had only been with her for one year also made sacrifices for her, and the classmates who only knew her name mourned for her.But I never wrote a word for her! I am frank, I did not feel sorry for her, I must know that there is a glimpse of Shen Zhi's reappearance of our friendship.I know that when she just passed away, I was so busy and dizzy in my heart that if there were any words, the words might not be written from my heart.Those words are just to cover the eyes and ears of the living, not to mourn for the dead.

I let her go, and I never want to write a word about her until the old friendship hidden in my heart pushes her to my eyes again. Today is that time!Shumin is a good daughter, a good student, and a very lovely person in my eyes.Although I know that she is not more real than others, I know that if she is alive, her family, school, and society will all be greatly influenced by her.She died, and the three sides were a pillar toppled—I don't think I can praise her more highly. Recently, due to illness, I often think of the second step of "illness".I think Shumin is nothing behind the screen of "death", like still water, but her "death" leaves her friends with a glimpse of the turmoil of the heart.However—the same is true for everyone, this turbulence is also like the fluctuation of water, it is passed on to each other...

This is the first reappearance of the old friendship in my heart one year after her death, and I faithfully wrote it down.The green hills are quiet, the pine forests are verdant, the sun has not penetrated into the clouds, and it is as gloomy as the day of her death last year. I believe this is the most suitable and clean environment for mourning her. With a weak wrist remaining from illness, he has been using his emotions for two hours.Last year's tears flowed today.If she and I know each other as deeply as we did when we were fifteen or sixteen-year-old children, I believe she will accept this memorial text a year later with sincerity and tears!

April, Day of the Sacrifice of Christ, 1924.Sandra, USA.Send Little Reader Newsletter Seventeen kid: On the road to health and recovery, misfortune has changed, and I have been very lazy in the past few days; after the rain, I happened to see a few thick yellow dandelions shining on the even grass slope, and I couldn't help but recall another thing. On the morning of January 19, it was a cloudy day after snowfall.I got up early for a mountain tour, and suddenly in the snow, I saw seven or eight dandelions in full bloom.I leaned over and picked it up and held it in my hand—I really didn't know that this ordinary grass was as hardy as plum chrysanthemum.I went back upstairs and tied the flowers together with a yellow ribbon to form a crown.People asked me what I did, and I said, "I want to crown my queen." Then I casually put it on a girl.

Amidst everyone's laughter, I just lay on the bed speechless - I was not crowning the queen, but crowning the dandelion.Although dandelion is a kind of grass flower that I am most familiar with, it has always been neglected by people and has never been favored by beautiful people.Today, because of unstoppable love, I actually let her shine on the beauty's head for a few hours. Dandelion is a yellow flower with stacked petals, which looks like a chrysanthemum, but I have never favored her.I have a general affection for flowers.Although sometimes I can't help but like the richness of roses and the purity of osmanthus, but when I am worried, roses and osmanthus are also like dung.In the moment when I am in a happy mood, the noble Tsinghua chrysanthemum cannot compete with the dandelion in my hand. Everything in the world is just millions of large and small mirrors, overlapping and contrasting, reflecting and reflecting; so there are so many bright, iridescent brilliance in the world.Without dandelions, there is no daisy, and without ordinary, there is no transcendence. And just because everyone loves daisies, dandelions cannot be eliminated in the world; mediocrity cannot be eliminated because everyone respects Superman.Even if all these can come and go because of the love and hate of the world, I'm afraid that when the valley is full of chrysanthemums and supermen, the value of chrysanthemums will not be as good as dandelions, and the value of superman will be less than mediocrity. Therefore, every thing in the world has its strengths, and every person has its own value.I can neither prefer nor prefer to hate.Realizing the principle that all things complement each other, I only wish that my heart is like water, and everything is equal.I would like the chrysanthemum to lose her magnificence in my eyes, and the dandelion to relieve her embarrassment and shyness, and turn the extreme of fraternity into indifference.But this kind of general indifference, except for the children of fraternity, who knows? This is the end of the book, Gao Tian is desolate, the wind is very tight upstairs, let's talk again, my little friend! Bing Xin, May 9, 1924, Sha Rang Sanatorium. By". )