Chapter 102 life(21)

Zhang Kenan vented all his distress on an elm stick.This elm stick with its roots removed is lying next to the charcoal and firewood in the yard of his house. Their family now has more than enough firewood for cooking and this winter, and there is no need to chop firewood at all.It is the lack of firewood, who has always done it himself?If you don't have any, you can just buy a few loads, don't need Zhang Kenanfei to work so hard!No one can remember what year this rough elm stick was lying in their yard, nor who brought it to them.Anyway, I have been blocking some stacks there to prevent the piles of firewood from falling down.

On the second day after Zhang Kenan received Huang Yaping's severance letter, he brought back a long-handled ax from the yard behind the non-staple food store, and broke the Yulin stick without saying a word.Among the local trees, the fibers of the elm are the toughest, and most people do not chop wood for burning-because it is difficult to break. Zhang Kenan was on the wall as soon as he got off work.He didn't actually split a few firewood for many days.He didn't care if it fell off or not.Anyway, he was sweating all over his head and body, panting like a bellows.But he kept swinging the long-handled ax for a moment... He was so tired that he couldn't bear it anymore, so he went back and lay on his back on the bed, with his head resting on his hands, closed his eyes and said nothing .

Sometimes his mother came over to see him like this, and didn't say a word, just looked at him sullenly.There was something turbulent in her heart that she couldn't tell, but she started smoking again after quitting smoking for a year.Kenan and his father are studying at the county party school and often don't go home.The courtyard was silent all day long. On this day, he chopped elm sticks desperately for a while, then closed his eyes and lay down on the bed, his tall and strong body seemed to be breathless, motionless. His mother came in.This time she opened her mouth: "Nannan, get up!"

Zhang Kenan didn't seem to hear, and was still lying motionless. "Get up! I have something to tell you! You are like your worthless father. You are in your twenties. What a waste!" Kernan opened his eyes, looked at his mother's gloomy face, and remained lying without speaking. "Let me tell you! I made inquiries two days ago, that kid Gao Jialin joined the work through the back door! It was run by Ma Zhansheng, a sycophant! I have all the materials!" There was a trace of elusiveness on her face. Laughing shadow. Zhang Kenan still ignored his mother. He didn't know what this matter had to do with his broken love, so he said flatly, "The front door and the back door are the same anyway..."

"You wretch! Let me tell you, your mother has exposed and charged this matter with the Disciplinary Inspection Committee of the prefectural committee a few days ago. Today, I heard from your Uncle Jiang, the county disciplinary committee, that the prefectural disciplinary committee attaches great importance to this matter and has sent someone to , I have arrived in the county today. He, Gao Jialin, is finished!" Zhang Kenan got up in a flash, stared at his mother, and shouted: "Mom! How can you do this? Whoever wants to do this will let who do it Come on! How can we do such a thing? Then we will become a villain!" "Fuck your mother! You worthless thing! You have been poached from your lover, and they say that this money is worthless What a bastard! Why didn’t I expose and accuse him of being a bastard? A country bumpkin bullied my wife. If my wife didn’t retaliate against him, why didn’t she spare him? Besides, he walked through the back door and broke the law. As a state official, I have the responsibility Maintain party discipline!" "Mom, in principle, you are right. But morally speaking, if we do this, we will be ruined! Everyone is watching! I will never think that you are strong in party spirit, but retaliate against you." Personal enmity! We can't use mistakes to correct mistakes!"

His mother took the first step, came up and slapped Zhang Kenan a few times, then sat down on the bed and began to cry; she cried out sadly: "My life is so miserable! Having such a useless thing... ..." Ke Nan touched the face that had been beaten by his mother, tears streaming down, and said: "Mom! You know, I like Yaping very much... My heart is always hurting like a knife, and I even want to die! I also hate Gao Gao too much. Jialin! But after thinking about it, there is no way out! As the saying goes, twisted melons are not sweet. Since Yaping doesn’t like me, but Gao Jialin, I have to admit this reality no matter how painful it is. You know , I have a kind heart, and I dare not even watch other people kill chickens since I was a child. The slaughterhouse is what I fear and hate most in my life! When I hear the howling of pigs, my hair stands on end and my nerves are going to be confused. Therefore, I I also don’t want to see people killing each other spiritually around my life...Mom! Although I am only twenty-five years old, I have already experienced some life; the reason why I have many friends in society is that everyone She is also willing to associate with me, just because I treat people with sincerity and generosity...I also have my own shortcomings. I am not strong enough in character, not bold enough in life, and have a narrow vision. Yaping just doesn't like me. But she doesn't know, I It's not just a depraved person! Yaping! You don't fully understand me..." Zhang Kenan grabbed his chest with both hands, and said to his mother first, and then to Yaping, who he couldn't see, The face twisted in pain into a horrible image.After he finished speaking, he fell down on the bed, as dead as someone dropped a sack of food... It was a long time before Kernan got up from the bed.His mother didn't know when she left; she didn't know where she went.The courtyard was as quiet as a deserted temple.

Kernan went out and hurried back and forth under the courtyard wall for a long time. After throwing more than a dozen cigarette butts on the ground, he went out and walked directly to the radio station.He found Huang Yaping, and quickly wrote his mother to the Discipline Inspection Commission, and told Yaping all about the situation that the Discipline Inspection Commission had sent people to the county, and at the same time told all his own thoughts.He asked Yaping to see if there was any way to save the situation. After listening to Huang Yaping, she didn't care about her urgency, and scolded: "Your mother is a despicable person!" She then said to Kenan with tears in her eyes: "Kenan, you are a good person..." Gao Jia The problem of Lin going to work through the back door was quickly investigated and implemented by the prefectural and county discipline inspection commissions.At the same time, Gao Jialin's uncle also found out about the incident, and called the secretary of the county party committee twice to ask the organization to resolutely send Gao Jialin back.

Right now, such issues have been of the greatest concern to the public.This matter quickly spread in the county; people were talking about it in the streets and alleys. At a standing committee meeting of the county party committee, this matter was specifically included in the agenda.The investigators attended the Standing Committee and reported in detail the investigation of this incident. The Standing Committee's decision was made quickly: Gao Jialin's job and urban residence registration were revoked, and he was sent back to the brigade; Ma Zhansheng, the deputy director of the County Labor Bureau, ignored the party's discipline and repeatedly went through the back door to engage in unhealthy practices, so he was dismissed from his leadership position. Call out the Labor Bureau and wait for the HR department to reassign work...

Special documents were quickly distributed to relevant units.Ma Zhanshengsheng was as anxious as an ant on a hot pot. He visited the leaders everywhere, asked people to intercede, told him to do a good job of self-criticism, and asked the county party committee not to punish him.Later, seeing that everything was of no avail for the time being, he had no choice but to complain everywhere, saying, "Ah, licking the ass now is on the edge of a fucking knife..." In the past few days, apart from Ma Zhansheng, another person involved in the incident, Huang Yaping, was also running around, looking for news and looking for her father's friends, to see if they could save the situation and prevent Gao Jialin from returning to the countryside.When she saw the document issued by the county party committee, she realized that the situation was irretrievable.

"It's over! It's over! It's over..." She cried out in her heart, not knowing what to do.She hadn't expected life to change as quickly as lightning; she had just begun to be happy, and immediately fell into pain! Hao pulled his hair and rolled on the bed.She couldn't bear the pain of the blow.Where is the focus of her pain? This is self-evident: she sincerely loves Gao Jialin, but she is also sincerely reluctant that Gao Jialin is a farmer!It is precisely this contradiction that she suffers from! If there is a firm choice in one aspect, she will not be so painful: if she doesn't love Gao Jialin, even if Gao Jialin goes to prison, it has nothing to do with her; if she doesn't care about anything for love, then Gao Jialin Even if Jialin goes to hell, she won't follow her!Contradictions cannot be unified.She thinks both aspects are very important: she loves Gao Jialin but is afraid that he will become a farmer!

Life is always cruel to people like her.If she does not establish and strengthen her own principles of life, life will continue to ask her such serious questions and let her choose.No choice!The contradiction of life itself is the omnipresent God, and no one can get rid of it!Huang Yaping felt that she didn't know what to do.Galin herself was away, and she had no close friends to discuss with her.Kernan could discuss it, but he was in such a position among them that he couldn't find it at all. Then she thought of her dear father.She can only talk to him about it now. How can I talk to my father?He was opposed to her leaving Keran and looking for Jialin.She had broken his heart in this matter, and what would he do with her present difficult situation?Anyway, she went to find her father. She went home to find him, and he wasn't home.Mom told her: Dad was in the office.She ran to his office again. Her father is wearing reading glasses, reading the "Liberation Army Daily".Seeing her come in, he took off his reading glasses and put them on the newspaper. "Father, do you know about Gao Jialin?" "Why don't I know? I have participated in the Standing Committee..." "What should I do..." "What should I do?" "What should I do?" "You?" "Well..." Her father raised his head, looked at the window, and remained silent for a long time. He lit a cigarette, and without looking at her, he continued looking at the window and said: "It's hard for me to understand the minds of you young people. You are too sentimental. You have not undergone the rigorous training of revolutionary life, and you have too many petty bourgeois things. It is these things that have led to your current situation... " "Dad, don't give me a political class! You know, how miserable I am now..." "The pain is your own making." "No! I think life is too cruel, it always plays tricks on people's fate !" "Don't complain about life! Life is always fair! You should blame yourself!" The old soldier said loudly, standing up from his chair excitedly, looking at his daughter with eyes under his long eyebrows. Huang Yaping stomped her feet and said in a crying tone: "Dad, I can't think of people becoming so cruel to me all of a sudden! I hate you!" Her father's heart softened all of a sudden, and he came over and stroked her hair with his thick palm, let her sit on the chair, and took out a handkerchief to wipe away the tears from the corners of her eyes.Then he turned around, made a glass of malted milk, added a large spoonful of sugar, put it in front of her, and said, "Drink some water first, your voice is hoarse..." He sat in the armchair in front of his desk again, tapped his fingers on the table, staring blankly at his daughter taking sips of the drink. After a long time, he leaned back in the chair and said with a long breath, "I don't doubt your feelings for that young man." Although I haven't seen him, I know that the person my daughter falls in love with won't be mediocre. At least a talented person.Therefore, although your mother and I were sad and felt sorry for Lao Zhang's family, you abandoned Keran so suddenly, but we still did not force you to stop you from doing so.Dad lived in the cannonball forest all his life, wandering all over the world, escaped death, and spent most of his life before he got you as a baby.As far as you and I are concerned, I value you more than I do; I don't want to make you feel wronged.Because of this, my concern for you is limited to not letting you be wronged, and I have not educated you to establish a correct outlook on life..." He suddenly stopped, waved his hand in the air, and muttered to himself dissatisfied Said: "What are you talking about!It's too late! He took a drag on his cigarette, looked back at his daughter who was sitting quietly, and said: "I've thought about it. You'd better listen to Dad this time. We're going to Nanjing soon. That young man is a farmer. How can we take him there? Just put him in the suburbs and rural areas as a commune member, you guys How do you live your life? Feelings belong to feelings, reality belongs to reality, you should..." "Do you want me to break up with Jialin?" Huang Yaping raised her head, her lips trembling. "Yes. I heard that he is in a meeting in the province now and he will be back soon. You look for him..." "No, Dad! Stop talking! How can I go to him to cut off the relationship? I love him! We just fell in love He has suffered enough blows now, how can I give him another blow? I..." Pingping, this kind of thing can no longer be willful!This kind of thing is not allowed to be capricious!If you can't live together, you will have to break sooner or later, the sooner you break the better!There will be less pain..." "Never less!I will always be in pain..." His father stood up, walked slowly on the ground with his head down, sighed twice in succession, and said: "I have experienced countless distressing things in my life, and none of the distressing things is as distressing as this one... distressing Ah!" He shook his head, "Originally, you and Kenan are doing well, but... oh, I just received a letter from my old comrade-in-arms the day before yesterday, saying that Nanjing has contacted Kenan with his work unit..." Huang Yaping stood up suddenly and shouted: "Don't mention Kenan now! Don't mention his name..." She walked over, sat in her father's armchair, and pulled out a blank sheet of paper.What are you going to do? "Father stopped and asked her. "I'm going to write to Galin and tell it all!" Her father hurried to her side and said: "You must not write to him now! Let him know about such a serious matter, what should you do if something happens outside? Isn't he coming back soon?" Huang Yaping thought for a while, Push the paper aside.She listened to her father's advice and said, "According to the original notice, I will be back in a week." She walked over and tore through seven pages of the calendar hanging on her father's wall.