Chapter 9 Nine

"If he doesn't become a husband, I won't beg him anymore. Let's see who is comfortable." "You can't breathe, there is no equality in love!" "If you don't want to connect fate together, what kind of love is it?" "Does love have to be that heavy? Love is just love." "You wait, I don't believe it, I have to find it." "Let's see." "Is my time up? Is twenty dollars enough?" "Come on, we are all buddies, no need. In fact, I still want to find someone for consultation. Let me tell you a word: don't believe in any psychological counseling, do what you want, don't do what you can't, what's the matter so what?"

Little haha: I miss you so much. ······ Discuss something with you: Someone introduced someone to me and your cousin, one is a retired old Red Army, and the other is an old scholar who has gone to school.The former proposed to me, and the latter proposed to your cousin.Do you think it's ridiculous?People say that the matchmaker got it wrong. ······ Both your cousin and I asked for your opinion, because you are enlightened and thoughtful about this kind of thing, but your brother firmly opposes it, saying it is for the "Huang" family... The mother is worried when the son travels thousands of miles.take care.

Mother "Confucius just asked Zigong to test whether the woman is chaste, and asked Zigong to pretend to flirt with her, and then to see her reaction. Unexpectedly, the woman rejected Zigong with a serious face, so Confucius expressed his admiration That woman. In my opinion, Confucius is not fair." said the ancient Chinese teacher at the university.In the year when we were about to graduate, his lectures became more and more "sloppy". He talked about Confucius asking Zigong to try "Is that woman acceptable?" and he talked about Western sexual liberation.He said that from the point of view of sexual liberation, Zigong should be really flirting with that woman instead of trying to test her chastity. There's a piece of wood."

No one knows where his "Western views" come from. Students who study "Western Philosophy" say that he tries "Hu Hu", and those who study "Chinese Philosophy" say that he tries "to save money". Anyway, his class More and more people talk about "pervading everywhere but not entering everywhere" and "yin and yang are connected to the essence and then flow through".Sometimes he also drew himself together with foreign movie stars. Mr. Gu Wen gave us individual correcting classes. In addition to correcting our homework for one hour every week, he also taught us some extracurricular knowledge. It was originally an easy class, but then we became less comfortable.In my eyes, Mr. Guwen seems to be arguing with the four big characters "Quiet and Inaction" posted on his wall. When it is quiet, he nods to the words on the wall. When it is not quiet or does not want to be quiet, he is sure It's time to fight them.Of course, the teacher reads a lot of books, so he must be better at distinguishing those four words when he argues.That's just four words, it's okay to take them off and tear them up when you're angry, but what if you need them to calm down if you tear them up completely?Those four words are free cooling oil, the cheapest psychiatrist, just looking at it, the body will be half cold.

When I was in a certain class, I sat facing the four characters, and while listening to the class, I could experience the fundamentals of great philosophy. However, because the Gu Wen teacher turned his back on the four characters and rushed at me, his heart was confused. "We Chinese always regard the intimacy between men and women as the traditional spirit of China. In fact, "Jade Putuan" is also a very important culture of Chinese people. It shows that the development of sex culture in China is the originator of world culture. We have a long history The history of sexual culture, but why is it still so repressed, so cowardly, and so prejudiced?" When he said this, his lips trembled, and then he took out an original version from the drawer and showed me: "Have you read this book? A classic of culture, sex culture is also a very important culture in China."

Of course I dare not say that I read it ten years ago, if he told the school leaders I would be expelled. "I have, sir. I heard it is a good book," I said. He opened the book, turned to a page, and showed it to me, it was written on the technical issues of how Pan Jinlian and Ximen Qing had sex and how happy they were. "Written incisively, incisively!" said the teacher.His hands, a sign of early aging, kept shaking. "Yes, teacher." I really don't understand it. When I read it ten years ago, I only understood the reason of my birth, but didn't think about the "culture" in it. Now, facing this man with shaking hands, I don't understand I dare not poke my head over the words in the book.

I can't tell if the teacher is in his forties, or maybe he is in his fifties. He has an honest portrait, like a "scholar" in a typical Chinese painting.His face never showed any excessive expression, even if what he said or did was scary enough, Lian still looked peaceful, but his hands kept shaking.He is a key talent cultivated by the school, and everyone says he is "young and promising". "Chinese erotic paintings are also the earliest and most abundant erotic paintings in the world." He got up again and took out a photo of erotic paintings.Facing "Qing Jing Wuwei", I sat on a chair and dared not move.

"Chinese culture is great..." He looked at the painting and said to himself. I tried my best to make an expression of discussing culture at Erotica. "Recently, I have read some western philosophy and literature. They talk about human nature, respect human needs, and analyze sex from a scientific perspective...Of course, your article "Being and Nothing in Chaos" is very well written. The understanding of the entire culture is the same, it seems that there is nothing, and nothing is nothing, so for sex..." His three sentences are inseparable from "sex".

"Teacher, please give me more advice next time." I stood up quickly. "Of course." I packed my schoolbag and headed out. "Do you have a boyfriend?" he asked suddenly. "Have." "How is your relationship?" "it is good." "Have you ever had a relationship?" "No!" I wasn't planning to have a serious "sex" discussion with him. "Oh, what a pity." "I have to go." "The relationship between two people is a kind of enjoyment. One of the greatest pleasures in life is the communication between the sexes, which is heaven. Many philosophies and religions advocate that sex can be used to achieve the highest state, and sexual intercourse can also cure diseases."

"..." I retreated towards the door. "Wait, don't go, there is something I want to ask you, because you young people always have more enlightened ideas, I want to ask you for advice." "······" "I have a girlfriend, according to what you modern people call a lover, right? About your age, maybe younger, she looks a bit like you." I really want to scold my mother, talk about "sex" first, talk about "culture" first, talk about "lover" first and drag me together! "Please don't tell my wife, my girlfriend is so beautiful, her legs are long, she is the image of an American movie star, she is very beautiful with or without clothes."

"..." Twenty years ago he would not have this kind of "aesthetic outlook". "According to the West, this kind of girl is sexy, but according to the East, it's... Well, the East has no good name for this kind of girl." His expression was still gentle and honest. "I see her every week and she wants me so badly, oh by the way, my wife wants me too. I'm dealing with my wife and my lover, better than those cowboys in the movies." Co-authoring his head is full of American movies. "Don't get me wrong. I hope you understand me. It's hard to find a soulmate. My contemporaries don't understand me. In fact, they are just hypocrisy. Our generation is miserable. The two of them scattered on the street holding hands It’s terrible. The sex life after marriage is as reasonable as the salary. Since I read the rest and visit study books in the past two years, I realized that this life has been wasted, like a machine! Thinking about Chinese culture, in fact, the old The ancestors would enjoy life, but it is a pity that it has been lost. In this generation, everything is a supply system! Don’t get me wrong. "Where did I think so much before? I focused on studying and didn't talk to girls in college. There was a boy who wrote a love letter for a girl to read, and the Youth League branch severely criticized it. My wife was introduced by the organization. She is Model members of the Communist Youth League, they all say that we are a gang, a couple, and I only kissed her face once before getting married, which scared her. .Hi.······ "Now my girlfriend is much more civilized, fully in line with modern standards... I kiss her all over, everywhere, including... when she is excited..." I put on gloves. "Sometimes I stand..." he continued. I open the door. Two days later, someone from the school came to me to investigate the ancient Chinese teacher. "You are his student, can you tell me what he taught in individual classes?" "Talking about Confucius, Laozi, Zhuangzi, Mencius, Xunzi, Mozi, princes, princes..." I started talking nonsense. "What else?" "Zigong, Zilu, Zixu, Ziqi, Ziming, Zibai, descendants, bullets..." I was talking nonsense again. "There must be something else outside of class." "It's all extracurricular stuff." "Something that shouldn't be said." "What do you mean you shouldn't talk?" "Such as Western sexual liberation, sexual civilisation, Freud,..." I suspect that Teacher Gu Wen told everyone about his romance. "He talked about Western philosophy in order to compare ancient Chinese philosophy." I said. "How did he say?" "Anyway, China is still great compared to the past." "What about sexual liberation?" "forget." "Okay, I remind you that we found pornographic pictures in his handbag." "Really?" Teacher Gu Wen was really crazy. "foreign." "I don't know, I haven't seen it." He changed the program again. "really do not know?" "really do not know." "Okay, think about it again. If you think of something, report it to the organization at any time. I believe that your younger generation is the most discerning." The investigation ended. The romance of the ancient Chinese teacher became the biggest news. It was said that he would be expelled from the party for this, and the ancient Chinese class was also stopped.I said: "We live in such a mess and no one came to investigate. Why did Mr. Gu Wen become so restless just after being romantic in this life?" Wanting to keep finding nice words for my actions, I deserve it." After graduation, as soon as I walked to the street and saw all kinds of books about sex on the bookstall, I thought of Teacher Gu Wen.It's not that he's the only one who is abnormal, everyone is rushing to buy it, even if it's a reprinted abridged version with nothing deleted, it's still worth a bicycle on the black market.There are more and more "Sexual Medicine", "History of Human Love", "Women's Sex and Orgasm", "Adolescent Sex", "Resolutely Stop Masturbation" on the bookstall... I am in a lot of new magazines. I also found an article on Taoism research by Gu Wen teacher. The cover of the magazine was a singer in a swimming suit singing folk songs, and the nineteenth page was a group photo of the teacher and his wife.The editor’s preface specifically mentions that Mr. Gu Wen is a modest and hard-working scholar, with a simple life and spiritual focus, a wide range of research topics, open-mindedness, and a good husband and party member. His gentle, honest wit smiled at the magazine. Ha ha: ······ Would you agree that mother and eldest cousin marry two old men they don't know?So what should we do with "Huang" Jia?My son's surname is not "Huang" now, but my wife's surname.Because my mother-in-law insisted on talking about "democracy" and "respect for women".What the fuck kind of democracy is this?Everyone lied to me that the policy will change in the future, and there will be another person with the surname "Huang". When will the policy change? The "Huang" family is finished. The little girl from "hometown" "eloped" with a group of young men and women from the countryside, and no one knew where she went. Since she left, our book "Red and Black" has been lost. ····· ······ What's the weather like in London? elder brother How am I not an ant? "I think you should find someone else to be your husband. I don't see how important a husband is, but since that's what you need, you have to find someone else. I won't be that stuff in my life." Yang Fei looked at him Hua'er said.The two of us lived together for ten years. Under the cover of his mother, others thought we lived in two houses in the same unit, and his mother and I slept together. Both my mother and my eldest cousin thought that I belonged to his family from now on. They just turned a blind eye and waited for me to finish my studies, get married and have children. Unexpectedly, Yang Fei came to be an "artist". "Hua'er is my wife, and you are my lover." He said deeply. what? I went home immediately and asked my cousin and mother to introduce someone to me. Within a week I had my fiancé. "Yang Fei, I'm going to get married." I frightened him. "Come on, I wish you happiness!" He said with a smile. "Yang Fei, aren't you afraid that I will commit suicide?" I frightened him again. "People who say suicide don't kill themselves. I wish you happiness, really." He still smiled. In a fit of anger, I tried my best to commit suicide, but after finding a way, I felt that it was worthless, so I went to the marriage registry to register my marriage. I'm married. The husband's mother is an old friend of my mother's, and they talk more together than my husband and I. "This young man is handsome, you two are a good match," said the eldest cousin. On the wedding day, I wore a red satin jacket, and my mother and my husband's parents sang together. "Beat Lao Jiang, beat Lao Jiang, beat Lao Jiang away and eat honey." They sang while laughing, as if that day was the anniversary of "Beat Lao Jiang". "We are good friends holding hands, let's send my brother to join the army." The husband's mother sang along. "Chicken called Gouwazi to bite, when the brother of the Red Army is back." The husband's father sang, he is an old comrade-in-arms of his father. "Flowers bloom all over the fields in May, and the flowers cover the blood of the people with lofty ideals." I don't know if my mother thinks of her "darling" or her father, and everyone wants to cry when she sings. It was a revolutionary history retrospective festival, and people from the past were getting married. When my brother drank too much wine, he either cried or laughed, and he either wanted to kill or kill himself.Since he was arrested and locked up for a month at the age of sixteen because he was a "linkage" for two days, he started to hunch his back.Later, when he went to jump the queue, his teeth were blackened by smoking, his body stinks from drinking alcohol, and when he went to work in the factory, he had one of his eyes scalded by Huo Zizi. "Mingyue... hiccup... when will... hiccup... put the wine... hiccup..." He burped and muttered. "Big cousin, please sing us a song." I suggested. "Oh, what I know is old-fashioned." said the big cousin. "Hey, big sister, now a hundred flowers are blooming and a hundred schools of thought are contending. There is no such thing as old or old, old or new, as long as it is beneficial to the four modernizations." The husband's father said loudly. "My dad is an idiot," the husband whispered. "When I was young, I heard those daughters-in-law scolding their husbands for not obeying the rules, so they sang this: If you don't come home tonight, go fuck your mother." The big cousin sang. "Ouch, this is so uncivilized." The husband's mother said, clutching her chest. "Good singing!" My brother and my husband all laughed. My mother-in-law gave me a big look. "Speaking of Song Laosan, the couple sell opium..." the elder brother deliberately sang. "There is hope for keeping a split, Huer Hey!" I sang. "Go, go, go and help in the kitchen!" Mom yelled at us. That night, smelling the paint on the new furniture, I lay in bed discussing "divorce" with my husband. "Divorce? How can it be? What happened?" Mom cried the next day. "Nothing happened, and we both found it boring to go on," I said. "Too flippant, tsk tsk tsk, out of the rules." "I promise---" "what?" "I promise---" I imagined before she spanked me when I was a child, I would say: "I promise I will change it next time." She would stop spanking me.But this time I can't say "I will change it next time." How to change it? Yang Fei was right.Marriage makes all the fuss. The cutest thing about my husband is that he doesn't love me or hurt me. He married me out of filial piety --- that was his mother's idea, and divorced me out of humanity -- and he has his own life.He respects women and is the darling of women at the same time. After I got divorced, I lived by myself. When my mother and my eldest cousin saw me, they looked me up and down. They thought I had insulted the chastity of a "single", neither a "virgin" nor a "widow" nor a "Wang Baochuan". The "hooligan" who beats up a divorce and finds a lover, "How can this look like my child?" Mom said in an "Anna" tone. The elementary school Chinese teacher corrected my composition about flies: "...Let the fire burn us to death! Let the sewer wash us away! Let the fly swatter kill us!..." Oh, hello. I went back to find Yang Fei, and Yang Fei had a new girlfriend. This time he was honest and agreed to be her husband.I just agreed to be my husband and felt that it was not as good as being my husband back then. After my dog ​​"Silly" chased away Yang Fei, he got married, and sang love songs to me on the phone after he got married. "After you were born, you have undergone various examinations in the hospital. The doctor said that you look like other children in all aspects." Before I left the country, my mother took my hand and repeated the conversation decades ago. I know she doesn't have any hope for me at all, but I just said this to comfort me and comfort her herself---she didn't spoil me when she gave birth to me. She no longer had the energy to stamp her feet and said, "You are the daughter of the Huang family, you think about Dad and me in everything you do!" What makes the Huang family different from other families?After careful investigation, I found that eight lifetimes ago, an ancestor deserted the army and eloped with a beautiful woman.So countless romantic seeds were born to the Huang family, and it was only in the father's generation that the "talent" of father came out, who was serious about doing "career", but father committed suicide again.The men in the Huang family are all bookish and angry. They are good at singing, dancing, riding and hunting, but they can't achieve anything because of their romantic temperament.A fortune teller once said that this family has a "bad" appearance.The only hero is Dad, but he "cut himself off from the people".My mother wanted to rejuvenate the family, but my brother just drank and cursed and was sentimental, and I was "dizzy and without a backbone".In the end, my mother had no choice but to sit in the unit house with hairy hair, smoking a cigarette, and chatting with the eldest cousin about the family affairs. During the "Cultural Revolution", relatives of Huang's family "drawn a line" one after another, declaring that they "disconnected" with their father. After the "Cultural Revolution", they began to move around again, and the "pro" and "court" people all came to the door to make a blind date, respect each other, and help each other.One year when there was a flood, a distant relative in my hometown sent a little girl, saying that she had no parents since she was a child, and no one in the developed world had enough to eat, and wanted her mother to find a way out for her in the city.The little girl was seventeen, but she looked smaller, so her mother let her stay at home.Speaking of things in her hometown, she asked: "Grandma, don't you know that someone in our family killed someone?" "What?!" Mom almost jumped up. "Oh, you don't even know this? It's the son of someone in our family. I call him Uncle Tang." No one can tell what kind of blood relationship the little girl has with our family. She is just a "big grandma" , "Our family", that uncle Tang did not know where he came from. "what happened?" "Oh, what a tragedy. He killed a woman, saying she was a classmate. Because he borrowed money and didn't pay it back, he killed her and divided her body." "Murder because you didn't pay back the money you borrowed?" "It wasn't she who lent him money, it was he who lent her money." "Who borrowed from whom?" "If a man borrows a woman, why don't you return it?" "How many?" "I don't know how many tens. The woman forced him to return it. When she was in a hurry, she killed her." "Kill who?" Mom was confused by the way the little girl spoke. "He killed her. Men kill women." "Tut tut." "It's not enough to divide the corpse, but... let's not talk about it." "What's wrong?" "And give the corpse to... let's not talk about it." "Go ahead." "It's ruined!" "How was it ruined?" I asked. "You still don't understand this? Rural people call rape a waste!" Mom scolded me. "Well, yes, rape. He wanted to do it before he killed her, but she didn't do it." The little girl said. "Who doesn't?" "Women don't do anything." "and after?" "I was killed later, and after I was killed..." the little girl said again. "How did you find out?" Mom asked. "Didn't he ruin her? Then he cut up the body with a knife and it was still in the river. People found it and fished it out. Ah, what a tragedy." The little girl said. "That's too bad!" Mom said. "That's right. When the body was picked up, I saw it, alas, it was ugly. The woman was already ugly, but after such a soak, everything, alas, became even uglier." The little girl said. "This child, why do you have no position when you speak?" Mom said. "What's a position? Is she ugly? People used to call her "Toad Mouth". I don't know why my cousin borrowed money from her and did that with her?" "Is he really your cousin?" Mom wanted to admit this kind of inexplicable relative. "Who knows? Who cares, let me call my church uncle my cousin, even if he kills someone, he will still be my cousin. Besides, we are not convinced." "Why?" Mom's eyes widened. "My cousin is so beautiful! He was a hero when he was taken to be shot by the police, just like the people in the movies." "What does he look like?" "Same as my uncle!" The little girl was referring to my brother. Mom almost passed out out of breath. "Oh, it's boring to be alive." The little girl continued, regardless of what her "big grandma" thought. "Hey, the family is over," Mom said. "What's over?" asked the little girl. "Look at you talking so stupidly, how can you look like you went to elementary school?" Mom wanted to lose her temper at her. "All right, all schools are the same. Are you afraid when there is a flood at home?" I changed the conversation and asked the little girl. "It's fun when there's a big flood. Everything is submerged, and the whole area is full of water. It's so beautiful." The little girl said excitedly. This is my home. "Big rice and scrambled eggs, I ate bowl after bowl, I ate my stomach, stretched my pants, went to the river, washed my pants, and the toad licked my pants, licked my pants, and bit my butt." dear lol: Ever since I came back to my country, I planned to start all over again, but I don't know how to start... People go and come back, come back and go. The farmers built buildings, but they still didn't build toilets and bathrooms, and they still dug a hole outside to freeze their buttocks. Sometimes I want to have a baby, but I heard that having a baby is like going to hell.A friend of mine just gave birth to a girl. During the delivery, the doctor used forceps to pull her head into an eggplant shape. You want to know what it's like here now?Let me open a list for you: Super buildings, super hotels, supermarkets, super companies, fast food restaurants, fast infectious diseases, fast-changing policies, supernatural powers, modern art exhibitions, big stars, small vendors, arranged marriages, model couples, pop music, human flesh buns, private cars , elopement, black market novels, black market dollars, prostitutes, imported dental fillings, murdered baby girls, foreign tourists, exchange vouchers, large and small advertisements, wars, low-status husbands, trafficked women, weapons, factories, Coca-Cola, " Kentucky Roast Chicken" store, female doctor, female writer, female factory manager, female model, actress, electrical appliance, upstart, award-winning movie, parade, holiday... How to start over? Little ginger Ha ha: Women are weird!Enclosed is a wedding invitation. old Andonara! ? ! Haha just woke up. The phone rang and she picked up the receiver: "Hello!" "Hey, haha!" It was Liu Ding. "How are you?" "Did you see the invitation?" "Old Gu and Andonara?" "God or not?" "Definitely!" "I have something even better here!" "what?" "I am pregnant!" "Huh?! With whom?" "A married man." "what?" "I'm going to have a baby." "what??" "Give birth to a bastard." "Are you crazy? Have you ever thought about it?" "I don't care about those things, I'm a little stunned, I can't even think about it." "What should I do next?" "In the future? Women equal motherhood; love equals giving; humanity equals reproduction; selflessness equals..." "That's right, there are still so many miles, if you want to give birth, you can give birth." "What are you doing?" "Me?" Haha began to tear up the manuscript of the novel: "The old monk tells stories..." "Lucky." "Crack." Haha tore the papers one by one. On the other side of the earth: "By the way, he also said that he is a real fairy. There is such a handsome man in the world. This charming person pretends to smile and is affectionate. I think your soul has already entered a foreign land. If Fang Qing really loves you, I will discipline you and the scholar Pei Luanhuang. As soon as Li Huiniang heard this, she looked back, ah! Seeing the old thief's high spirits, the pretty lady's heart jumped wildly in fright, her jade body was cold, her pink face was scorched, and her true soul went to look out for the country." The drum book artist sang. The eldest cousin sat in front of the TV and shook her head while watching. "Did you watch the TV series?" Haha's mother said to the eldest cousin who was fascinated.She went over and turned on the TV. "I don't like watching that foreign drama, you love me and I love you." The eldest cousin protested. "Aren't you watching those old dramas the same? It's just that the language is different." "Foreigners, not good-looking." "It'll be nice if you watch it more." Haha's mother moved her eyes closer to the TV, watching "Anna". "It's not good-looking. It's rough and big-eyed, it's not good-looking." The eldest cousin turned and went to the kitchen. First draft April 1989 June 1990 Second Draft in London