Chapter 34 Thirty-four

The train station is indeed very small. I only found it when I saw a red light beside the railway.There was no platform at the station, and a mud house not much bigger than a police box was built beside the two railroad tracks.The roof is covered with thick white snow, like a lonely big mushroom on the snow field.There were no lights in the house, and it was pitch black.I pushed open the slatted door and walked in.Inside, as Captain Xie said, there was a stove converted from a large gasoline barrel, and the coal was almost exhausted.I shook off the snow from my body, and by the faint red light from under the grate, I found an iron cleaning rod.I picked up the iron pass and swept across the ground, and finally came across a small pile of coal in the corner.I filled up the coals, poked the stove, and sat down on a wooden bench.Then take off the worn-out cotton shoes, scrape off the mud and snow, clean the stove with the uppers of the shoes, and put two barnyard buns and cotton shoes on the stove to bake together.

The stove quickly ignited, and the flames burst out of the stove, and the red light in the cabin was twinkling.The soles of my feet hugged the hot iron stove bottom like the palm of my hand, and after a while, my whole body was warm.While turning the barnyard noodle buns, I looked around.Messy murals were painted on the four walls, all improvised by passengers waiting for the bus. I felt like I was in a cave inhabited by a primitive hunting tribe found somewhere in Africa.The strange thing is that there is no ticket window here. Ah, I just remembered that the editor of the newspaper once told us: This is not a station, but a boarding and landing point. Only the slow trains that must stop at every station stop here for one minute.The local train will come at four o'clock in the morning, so I have to wait here at least until four o'clock.

Just wait.I was eating the barnyard noodle buns, thinking of Hai Xixi, if the journey goes well, he should be at his aunt's house by now.I sincerely wish him a happy Spring Festival, and sincerely wish him a happy life in the future!I dozed off in front of the warm fire. After being in a daze for an unknown amount of time, there was the sound of snow treading outside the slatted door.Following that, Captain Xie opened the door with a bang and entered. "Donkey day, it's snowing heavily!" He stomped his feet, patted his clothes and hat, stretched out his shriveled neck, and coughed repeatedly, "Cough!...you are still here, Daer, how are you? This Daer After all, it's better, cough...those people will suffer in one night for chasing in the snow! Cough..." Before he knew that "those people" hadn't chased in the snow, he ran home early to sleep.I have a little pity for him, but also a little admiration for him.After all, he is caring for me; he is also responsible for himself.

I let him sit next to me, and gave him a leftover baked barnyard bun.He picked it up and looked at it, saying that I can bake it well, but he didn't eat it and put it on the stove again.He said that a large pot of mutton bone soup was boiled in the sheep pen, sprinkled with barnyard flour, and made a "mud soup". People who went to the sheep pen to work overtime drank two bowls.I think lantana and Ershe have also eaten, and I feel warmer on my body. "Captain Xie," I asked him, "can you catch Hai Xixi?" "Catch a bear! It's possible that the donkey will run away, and who can catch him!" He wiped his nose and said, looking at the fire.

"Since you know you can't catch him, why do you still ask us to chase him?" I was surprised. "Hey!" He sighed, "If you don't chase him, the field department will know: 'You don't care about the man running away, what are you doing for food?!' Come to the station and wait for the four o’clock train to report to the field department.” He told me that the station is 30 miles east of our team, and the field department is 20 miles south. His arrangement was quite ingenious, he pretended to chase after Hai Xixi, and at the same time took the train to go to the headquarters. "Did he make any mistakes, why did the court insist on arresting him?" I asked puzzled.

"He made a bear mistake! That donkey is so capable, no one wants to let him go. You don't know, you just see him driving a cart, but in fact the bear is plowing, raking, plowing, rolling, laying bricks and building houses. , can do everything. Where can I find such labor now?!" Oh—Hai Xixi is really right.I asked again: "So, what will happen if you catch him?" He leaned his elbows on the edge of the fire, his face flushed.The skin on his face was loose, and the firelight illuminated the wrinkles on his face, which were the traces of working outdoors all year round.He must have suffered from severe trachoma, with cloudy tears constantly streaming from his eyes.I reckoned that his actual age was much younger than his appearance, but at this moment, his whole face, like the first time he talked to me alone, showed the characteristic tolerance of an old man.I was very moved, and because I wanted to work with Hai Xixi, I almost told him that Hai Xixi was at his aunt's house under Yamane, go and get him back.But on another thought, it's better not to pretend to be smart and break your promise to Hai Xixi.I asked, "Where do you think he could go?"

"Where is he going? He must go to Inner Mongolia. Under Shan Genxia, ​​he has an aunt in Nada. Guaranteed he will go to celebrate the New Year." I was secretly startled.It seems that he did not send people to chase down the sheep road down the mountain on purpose. "Oh!" He wiped away his tears. Although he was not sad, he seemed to have a sad expression. "If you catch him back, you can tie his body, but not his heart. That donkey bastard, I know, without a good woman, without a home, he can’t stay anywhere for long. If he is brought back today, he will have to run away tomorrow. With legs growing on him, who can watch him?!...Original , He stays on our team, he is thoughtful." I didn't dare to talk anymore, I doubt that he has insight into everything.I lowered my head and awkwardly flipped the burnt barnyard buns.

The snow had probably stopped, and there was no rustling outside.The world suddenly fell into a tense silence, and the crackling of poor-quality coal in the hearth added to the uneasy atmosphere. "Hey," he suddenly turned his face to me and said, "Xiao Zhang, to be honest, you should marry Lana Hua." This is the second suggestion I heard tonight, and it came from two people. inside.I understand how he associates this with Hai Xixi.I panicked noncommittal. "Lantana is a capable woman," he said, "sometimes she flirts with men, but what's the matter? A woman leads a doll, eighteen yuan a month, and in this famine year, What do you call her? When you get married, she will take care of her."

I wanted to shout at him: Lana didn't mess around with "men"!However, the four-year labor camp and the fact that I am still under the dictatorship make me unable to muster up the courage to argue with Captain Xie.I still bowed my head in silence. "Don't dislike her." After a pause, he said again, "Many women have been cheated when they were young, and then they married in a serious way. They are all good. Don't listen to 'American Hotel' ’ If so, I know that she and Hai Xixi were alone in those few months, but for some reason, she didn’t want to treat Hai Xixi... I think you two are quite suitable, you work well and your age is about the same. She can still give birth to a baby for you. From now on, let’s live on the farm. It’s easier to live with two people than with one. This famine will soon be over, and life will get better day by day. I heard that, Just this month, the central government is going to hold a conference in Beijing①. It seems that the policies of the past few years are about to change. Life is getting better, where is life different? You have to run like the few in your group. Going back to the city?... To be honest, whatever you do is a lifetime, let’s let the past go!"

He didn't tell me the big truth, and at the same time carefully avoided my particularly sensitive issues of origin, mistakes, and identity, and told me what I thought at the time was very confidential information within the party.His tone was very gentle. I haven't heard a party member cadre speak to me in this tone for a long time.He is much older than me, which generally refers to the enlarged Central Work Conference held in January 1962 with 7,000 participants.The red fire illuminated his tired, prematurely aged face, giving it a paternal kindness.No matter how vulgar and uneducated a person is, as long as he has sincere feelings and insight into things, he will naturally appear tall and dignified.In this quiet night, beside the hot stove, in the cave-like hut, the gap between me and him was melted by his comfort and concern, and my tears could not stop flowing out of my eyes. Under the bright red firelight, it looks like drops of bright red blood dripping on the stove.

He looked at me, said nothing, folded his hands, leaned back a little, leaned sideways on the stove and started to doze off.