Chapter 3 3

3 There are various situations in life, I have more than one little aunt, but the one mentioned here is a real little aunt. I like my uncle very much and hope that he will marry various women; after much deliberation, I always think of Marilyn Monroe.This person has been dead for many years, her body was reduced to ashes, but it is said that she had a large bust when she was alive.As mentioned earlier, my uncle has exotropia, so the bust of my little aunt must be large, otherwise part of the chest will be out of the field of vision, and the visual effect will be too poor.In fact, I was just worrying about it. It took only one night for my little aunt to cure my uncle's exotropia.

The little aunt is tall and tall, with fair skin and soft waist. No matter she is sitting on the bed or on the sofa, she always tends to lean sideways, facing people with her short black hair.In addition, she always showed the appearance of not being able to hold back her smile.She always said a word to me: Is there something wrong?This is what she said when I pretended to inadvertently break into her room to see her, and she looked like this at this time.This has happened many times.But it was all in the past.It started like this: I lived on the first floor when I was young, and then moved to the sixth floor, and there was no elevator.These buildings have some bare concrete stairs, dusty, powder-flaking corridors, garbage scattered along the corners, and so on.To be precise, the garbage is some onion skins, egg skins, and various plastic bags, which smell bad.Everyone wants to scan, but everyone feels that they are at a disadvantage.One day, heavy footsteps sounded on this staircase; then a female voice said from outside the door: "The criminal, is this here?"A male voice replied: Yes.I heard it and said to my mother: It's broken, it's my uncle.My mother still didn't believe it, saying that my uncle was still far away from coming out.But I believe it, because I know more about my uncle's moral character than my mother.

When he opened the door, it was indeed him, and he brought a girl in uniform. She was my aunt, but she refused to say so.My uncle introduced my mother and said: This is my eldest sister.The little aunt took off her hat and called out, "Elder Sister."My uncle introduced me and said: This is my nephew.She said: Yes.Then he laughed loudly and said: Wang criminal, your nephew is very similar to you!I don't like others to say that I look like my brother-in-law, but that time was an exception.I think the little aunt is very charming.If I had known that I would have such an affair when I entered the training hall, I might as well go there for my uncle.

Now I have to admit that I don't even like my uncle's girlfriend.But my aunt is a special case.When she first appeared, she was wearing a uniform, a big-brimmed hat on her head, a wide belt, and a small pistol pinned to her waist.I was mesmerized by her attire.And when my uncle appeared, he was wearing a pair of stainless steel handcuffs; and he held it on his chest, like a bear bowing to him.Just as there is a difference between a cat and a mouse, there should be a difference between a prisoner and a discipline, so some wear handcuffs and some carry guns.As soon as we entered our house, my aunt opened half of my uncle's handcuffs.

Which made me think she was putting him in handcuffs for show.Unexpectedly, she conveniently locked the half-opened part to the heating pipe, and then said: "Sister, I need to use the bathroom, so I got in."My uncle couldn't stand upright or squat down there, he half squatted and half stood, and replied shyly, which made me wonder what happened.After a while, the little aunt came out, handcuffed my uncle and her again, and sat side by side on the sofa.I feel like they are playing some kind of sex game.In general, certain things in life require a sense of humor to understand.But my mom has no sense of humor, and she doesn't understand anything, so she's pissed off.I have a sense of humor, and I think that's why my aunt is so charming.

As soon as I saw my little aunt, I knew she was hot enough to choke my uncle.But anyway, she's always a woman, better than a man.On the balcony, I congratulated my uncle, saying that my little aunt was prettier than any girl he had dated before.My uncle didn't speak, but asked me for a cigarette.According to my experience, when my uncle is silent, don't provoke him, otherwise he will plot against you.Besides, he seemed very unhappy that day.I was handcuffed to him, and if he turned on me and hit me, I would have nowhere to hide.My uncle finished smoking that cigarette and said to me: It is not certain whether this matter is a blessing or a curse; then he said: Go back.So we went back to the bedroom and asked my little aunt to remove the handcuffs.The little aunt looked at us and said, "Wang criminal, this little villain really looks like you, maybe as bad as you." Aunt and nephew rarely talk in this tone.Besides, my uncle smoked that cigarette so cleanly that he took the butt off.This shows that he needs nicotine very much.Because he is very good at socializing, he will never be short of cigarettes wherever he goes.It's an unusual sight to be puffing on a cigarette these days.In short, I know my uncle myself, and I have never seen him so low-key.

Now I must admit that when I was young, my consciousness was very low, not as good as a little girl on the bus.The girl was very clean, only wearing a pair of shorts, not even a skirt.She doesn't wear skirts because her mother thinks that her legs are not enough to arouse men's evil thoughts, and she wears shorts because the parts above her legs are enough to arouse men's evil thoughts.My little aunt escorted my uncle to take the bus. It was very late and there were only six or seven people on the bus.The little girl ran up to my uncle, looked at the handcuffs he was wearing, and asked the little aunt, "Auntie!Uncle, what's the matter?The little aunt explained: Uncle made a mistake.This child has a clear distinction between likes and dislikes, and at the same time, he can see that my uncle is handcuffed and unable to move, so he asks his little aunt for a baton to beat my uncle up.The little aunt explained that not everyone can hit the uncle who made a mistake; the child blinked his eyes as if he didn't understand.The little aunt explained again: Only the aunt can beat the uncle's mistakes.This time the child understood, and yelled at his little aunt: I hate it!You are boring!just ran away.

When it comes to awareness, the lowest is of course my uncle.Next is me, I always think on his side.The second is my mother, she is not pleasing to see my little aunt handcuffing my uncle.Next is the little aunt, she kept vigilance against the little uncle.But the one with the highest awareness was the little girl.If you see a person with a low level of consciousness and want to beat him up, that means you have a high level of consciousness. My uncle's mistakes are many and many, but in the final analysis, they are just one sentence, and no one understands the picture.That's all, it doesn't matter, those paintings still seem to be understandable, which makes people suspicious, thinking that he has hidden evil intentions.When I write his story now, I seem to be making the same mistake—this story is understandable but no one can understand it.But it's not my fault, it's my uncle, that's who he is.My mother has a prejudice against the little uncle, thinking that the little uncle is neither like the uncle nor like her. She thinks it is a mistake in the delivery room.I look a lot like my uncle, so she said, I was also mistaken.But I don't think you can always get it wrong, you have to get some things right.Anyway, she always thought that I was the only one who knew about my brother-in-law—in fact, it was a misunderstanding, and my uncle didn’t know what was going on with him—so she called me into the kitchen and said: You are the same thing, Tell me, what's going on here?I said: nothing.Uncle fell in love with another girl, a policewoman.He's coming out soon.My mother was worried, but not about my uncle, but about my little aunt.From her point of view, the little aunt was a good girl, and my uncle was not good enough for her—my mother always paid attention to this kind of unfitness, as if she was working in a breeding station.But at night she stopped worrying about her little aunt, because they started making love - although it was in another house and the door was closed, we knew they were making love because they were both yelling, high and low , can not be cut off all night, the noise can be heard in the whole building.This made my mother very angry, she slammed the door and went to live in a guest house, and dragged me away.What angered my mother the most was: I thought my uncle was doing well in the training center, so he would graduate early (or release), but it turned out to be the opposite: my uncle was doing badly in the training center, and he was going to be sent to Being punished, the little aunt is the escort.The two of them were on their way to the labor camp, so they sneaked here to fool around.For this reason, my mother said to me viciously: "Tell me again, what's going on here?"This time even I don't know what's going on, so it can be seen that my brother-in-law and I are not the same thing.

After appreciating my little aunt's high awareness, I was full of doubts about her behavior: Since you think my uncle is a bad person, why do you want to have sex with him?Her answer was: Don’t do it for nothing——Although your uncle is a bad guy, he is not a bad man.This is called recycling.But she didn't say that that night. After I did, I would tell my uncle, and my uncle would become vigilant—this was a very later thing. The scene where my uncle and my aunt made love was on the small sofa in my room.I'm pretty sure of that, because the couch was stiff and looking the other night when I left, and it was like a piece of sourdough when I got back.In addition, there were three pieces of chewed gum stuck to the wall behind the sofa.I took one piece off, tasted it, and found it chewed for at least an hour.Therefore, we can infer the scene at that time: my uncle was sitting on the sofa, and my aunt was riding on him, chewing gum.After thinking about this, I thought the scene was very good, so I cheered and threw myself on my bed.This is the only bed in the house, but there is no trace of sleeping on it.But I didn't expect my little aunt to hold a gun in her hand, and the gun was aimed at my uncle.Knowing this, it is really hard to say whether to cheer or not.

By the way, the little aunt likes to have sex with the little uncle very much, every time she is very excited and yells loudly.At this time, her left hand was always handcuffed to my uncle, and she held a small pistol in her right hand. At first it was a real gun, but later she used a toy gun to compare my uncle's head.When you can breathe through, say: Say!Wang criminal, do you love me, or do you want to use me?In good conscience, my uncle thinks that the female employees of state agencies should be used first, and then love can be said.But when the gun was pointed at the head, he naturally didn't dare to tell the truth.In addition, it is really hard to say how much happiness there is in making love in this state.

The little aunt and the little uncle are not on the same side.This is the only way people who are not at the same level can have sex.When I was having sex with my little aunt at home, my uncle stared at that little steel gadget and kept thinking: Damn, does this thing have a safety mechanism?Where is the fuse?What kind of insurance is considered closed?Originally, he could remind his little aunt, but they didn't know each other very long, so he was embarrassed to say so.I didn't know until I got acquainted with him that there was no bullet in the gun; but my uncle was very angry; he would rather be killed by the gun going off than to worry in vain.However, the gun cured his eye problem.It turned out that he had one eye in one eye and one eye in the other. He had been staring at the muzzle of the gun for too long, so he corrected it.It's a pity that I overcorrected and became cross-eyed. After the little aunt made the little uncle cross-eyed, she was very proud at first, but later regretted it.She posted an advertisement for seeking medical treatment in a tabloid, and received such a folk prescription: a pair of bull eyes, water and yellow cattle are not limited, but they must be born in the same cow.After honey staining, keep one and send the other to Nanjing.It is estimated that when it arrives, I will take the one left in Beijing and rush to Nanjing to serve the other.My aunt wanted my uncle to try it, but when my uncle heard that he wanted to eat bull's eyes, he said, "I'd rather die."Because he didn't take this prescription, my uncle's eyes were still so close.But if my brother-in-law takes the folk prescription and his eyes become like the eyes of a dead cow, one goes south and the other goes north, I don't know what it will look like. The next morning, my mother said to my little aunt: You are sick, you should go to the hospital.This refers to the rush of pleasure when she makes love.The little aunt kowtowed the melon seeds calmly and said, if it is a disease, it is a good disease, why treat it?Judging from this sentence, the little aunt has a clear mind and complete logic.I don't think she looks sick.After saying these words, she did something even weirder: the little aunt stood up, put on her armed belt, took out the handcuffs, and handcuffed my uncle with a "swipe"; Labor reform, don't waste the time.My uncle played foolishly and wanted to play for a few more days, but my little aunt raised eyebrows and said, "Stop talking!"She also said that love is love, and work is work. She stood firm and would never join forces with the prisoner—so my uncle was taken away.This incident made my mother go crazy with anger, and later she died young, and my little aunt was responsible.