Chapter 7 Section VII

Xu Xian exchanged glances with me. I strode forward quickly and helped her back to the room. She shakes my hand away.But she couldn't even get rid of my hand. Maybe she knows.Maybe she doesn't know. It's just that the relationship between a man and a woman is different. From this moment to the previous moment, even the texture and taste of the air have changed, gradually spreading until others are aware of it.Can't fool anyone. I hope Suzhen doesn't know.I deceive myself like this. After suffering and falling, we put her on the bed. She came back covered in blood and sweat. I think it was a hard struggle, and finally she was forgiven.I heard that the Antarctic fairy is also considered a good old man, and he is about the same age, so he is less domineering.The ganoderma lucidum has been stolen, so it's better to give it to her, and let her owe him forever and thank him.No matter how fierce He Tong Lu Tong is, he is just a subordinate; if the master is willing, being fierce is useless.

However, in the process of begging, Su Zhen really gave her self-esteem unconditionally, accepted everything, endured humiliation, for her love. "...I'm thirsty." Suzhen muttered. "Sister, I'll make you a hot bowl of ginger soup." Just wanting to take the opportunity to do some work, I have to step down. "I'll go!" Xu Xian hurriedly answered, scrambling to hide. "No, I'll go." "I'll go!" Xu Xian said to Suzhen, he wanted to tell her to listen to her alone, "My lady, fighting a giant snake like this to save me, it's really hard for you. I'll bring it to you."

At the end, he comforted in every possible way: "Miss, take a good breath, and it will come later." He ran away like an escape—how much he cared about her!In order to make up for my mistakes, I couldn't wait to make it myself.I'm afraid that I can't make up for his tenderness to me on the bed after exhausting all his love ingredients.Hey, does he think he's still the same loyal man he used to be? "Xiaoqing, come here." I move closer.See her face change four or five colors.Thousands of worries and hatred welled up in my heart, and my lips began to tremble, not knowing what to say.Like a dying person who had to utter his last words, maybe it was a curse: "Xiaoqing——I hate you! You are cheap!" She said viciously, her eyes seemed to spit out a fire, turning me into ashes , One foot is gone.

Because she spared no effort to hate me, she didn't finish her sentence, her blood was running low, her soul was agitated, Suzhen rolled her eyes and passed out. My soul is hardened into a lump, impenetrable. She will not die, she will hate me endlessly.I will not die either, I will be hated by her endlessly. Taking a step back, the tide of thought rises and falls. The wind suddenly picked up.A gust of early summer breeze blew my hair up, and before I could straighten the messy bun, the wind made it even more messy.Hair whipping my face, no sound, only my heart... "You are cheap!" This is too much.

I stared stiffly at her body, her head, her face, her eyes.Closed tightly, the fire was temporarily extinguished, waiting for another burning.The way she looked at me would never be the same again.This fainted woman with a grudge is my sister who lives and dies with me?All history will be lost.In this lustful and vicious relationship, we were incompatible. My eyes suddenly and unpreparedly stopped on her heaving chest. Her heart beat slowly and feebly. what.real.As long as the sword stabs here-- Don't worry about anything, just stab here—— Stab it down, then swish it out.Sweet blood, sour blood, cold blood, like a bowl of sweet-scented osmanthus plum soup, gurglingly filled the bed.She would die painlessly, without imagination.how nice.The cause and effect are all in doubt, but it is difficult to pursue it.

She loved me.When she just wanted to hate me and was suspicious, she couldn't continue to hate me.I have seen her grind the flowers into juice and dye them on her skirts to give off fragrance.When the flower is dead, all the benefits of the flower, a ray of soul, follow the behavior and fall in love with each other. I turned to look for the sword that belonged to me. I never felt so light when I went out. But when he came back, he was suddenly heavy because of the extra sword.Slightly reeling, she realizes that Suzhen is not on the bed! she is gone! I was terrified, trying to suppress my hissing breath in the small room.I am at a loss.

Come here with your sword in hand, what are you going to do?But "cannibalism"!Bored human beings are eager to do this.And I, my morals are so high... Sudden-- There was a chill on the neck, and the cold sword light flashed, and the weapon was placed at the vital point.I have the creeps. With a slight movement, the sword just wouldn't move.A hole was cut open.Not dark at all, like a strand of red hair stuck to the neck.I dare not do it again. I can't see who's behind it.But who else?What I wanted to do, she pre-empted it. Gritting teeth.Intrigues. Either you die, or I die.

This pair of male and female swords was once our spoils.The two split.Who expected the two to confront each other? Suddenly felt the sword on the neck tremble.Because of my focus.Even the slightest movement is a shock. Yes, she is at the end of her strength.Without seeing her, I also feel that the momentum is unsustainable. I was sweating profusely, waiting for an opportunity to attack, curled up, bounced back, turned around with a swish, and struck her sword with a backhand. Finally, inevitably, we were face to face. At this moment of life and death, no one can do anything.No one can do it.

——Perhaps, I really can't bear to kill her, otherwise how could I be restrained so easily? Maybe, she actually couldn't bear to kill me, so I have a chance to fight back. We all seem to be bewitched. "Love" is more poisonous than us, so it cannot be resisted.In an infinitely sad way, the two crossed swords. In the distance to the west, the bells of the temple came.Especially shocking. We two exchanged swords in an infinitely sad way.Do not move. The moon sets, black crows and frost covers the sky, Jiang Feng fishes and fires face sorrowful sleep; outside the Hanshan Temple in Gusu City, the bell rings to the passenger ship in the middle of the night.

By the way, seven miles west of Changmen Gate in Suzhou is exactly the Hanshan Temple sung by Zhang Ji, a poet of the former dynasty—we are both guests of Gusu, so why did Hanshan ring the death knell for both of us? Suzhen's face turned whiter, and mine turned greener.Is this what we are? Suzhen said to me in a strange and indifferent voice: "Don't think, I don't know." "What do you know?" I asked arrogantly. "Who can hide it from?" She disdainfully. "I don't intend to lie, that's what the scumbag did." I went all out, "What do you think should be done?"

"Xiaoqing," Suzhen said angrily, "I——can't tolerate you, with you around, there will never be peace." "I'm not necessarily willing to tolerate you either!" I said, "Be fair, sister." "There is no such thing as fairness or unfairness in this matter!" "You ask him to pick it up," I said in a high-pitched voice, "you tell him to pick it up. Ha! It's no longer a question of depth. Who do you think he wants?" The authorities are obsessed, and every woman thinks she is sure of winning.Every woman thinks that a man only loves her, and the others are just playing around. Suzhen is my foreplay, and I am her afterplay.The other party is a drama, and she is a living and bloody reality.Unable to extricate themselves, resulting in underestimating the enemy's damage. In the end, everyone loses. This is true, but who dares to admit it? "Look who he wants?" Suzhen's face turned pale, but the sockets of her eyes slowly turned red. She tried her best not to let the disappointing tears well up. got to burst— "I can't 'see who he wants' anymore, Xiaoqing!" Suzhen ruthlessly pressed down the tears to her throat, and stopped them.She put the sword aside: "I can't. I am pregnant with his child!" what!Like thunder, the sword in my hand fell down with a sound.I stood there dumbfounded, I didn't know why, I was not prepared at all, and my tears suddenly flowed down.Not sadness, not excitement, this burst of tears, without consent, without asking the reason, rolled down privately.I just stood there. Suzhen also threw away the sword. She held my hands tightly, tightly: "Xiaoqing, I - I am riding a tiger." No no no. "sister!" I hugged her and wept uncontrollably.Suzhen didn't make a sound.Her tears dripped into my collar secretly, seeping in, drop by drop, cold to the bottom of my heart.Make me a little pain. There is no turning back. Luo Chouqi's hatred disappeared into nothingness. My sister is pregnant! "Sister, you are too much!" I scolded her, "Why are you doing this?" I beat her back: "I won't let you do that! I won't let you bear him a child!" "Xiaoqing," she actually comforted, "I want to be a 'real' woman. I love him and can't look back. From now on, I will have to confine myself and drink chicken soup. I will breastfeed the child myself. When he grows up, Teach him to read and write..." "You're so despicable!" I didn't want to listen, "You pave the way for yourself, what about me? What should I do?" what!All of a sudden, everything is vulgar.What kind of lust entanglement, what kind of love and hate torment, it's not the same thing anymore. Suzhen, who is hard-working and lonely, her most successful feature is "excessive".I'm all gone. "This is my choice, I am willing." Suzhen said, "I am willing to give up my life to save his life. Do you have any?" do i have itI don't.Thinking of Suzhen Kunlun stealing fairy grass, but I am a ready-made one.How ashamed!I thought over and over again: I'm not there yet.I failed.It is completely the peace of mind of the current emperors of the Song Dynasty, indulging in leisure and pleasure, but hoping that the days will pass.Pick up ready-made. Come across a man like that—his only quality is passion. But, now, how to get rid of each other?Man and woman, this is the most complicated and weird relationship in the world, ecstasy and unreasonable.Thought to get out of the world of mortals, who knows that he is still struggling in the world of mortals. "—Sister, I've decided. He's yours." I wrapped my loose hair behind my ears, revealing my entire face with a calm smile.After the rain, the sky clears up, and all the suspicions are cleared up: "He won't love me, don't worry, he has been thinking about you all the time, your hard work is not in vain. I will try him and I will know. How stupid you are, you are really angry." Suzhen smiled meaningfully, she seemed to let out a sigh of relief when she got what I said, feeling unspeakably comfortable. She is his dignified wife, what am I?I love him, but I have no chance to marry and have children with him. I wish I could be as forgetful and ruthless as a baby! wife. Such an identity is always beyond my ability.The emperor's wife is the queen, Zitong.The wives of princes are called madam.Ordinary people call them Zhuojing, Zaokang, Niangzi, daughter-in-law, shopkeeper, and family leader... However, I will never be Xu Xian's wife in this life. So Suzhen hates me for being "cheap". "My lady," Xu Xian came in with a hot ginger soup, without looking at me, "Drink it while it's hot." —I went away quietly. "Where's Xiaoqing?" He asked. "We'll talk about everything tomorrow," she replied. She won again, she was always ahead of me. Ah, it turned out to be such a night.The weather is fine tonight, when I look up, I can see a sky full of stars, a sky full of stars, a sky full of stars. They glowed coldly, and I looked at them in amazement, never having seen such brilliant starlight.When I was in West Lake, I was never so surrounded by stars, almost palpable and pickable.They had stored up my joy, and they were used up again without reservation.My joy can't stand the waste, so it collapses. No one wakes up, only I wake up, in this world, in such a starry night, only me, my heart is like a mirror, and my love is like light smoke.Desperately frustrated, softly involved. I have a beautiful and tragic decision, the stars are shining tonight, testify to me, I will not swear to the moon, just because the moon looks changeable, but this star in the sky-I, never, no longer, love, him. Let's talk about it tomorrow. Fortunately there is tomorrow. Fortunately, after an overnight stay, everything was filtered out, and we will talk about it tomorrow. The dawn was dim. I didn't sleep, watching the sky turn from blue and white to crimson, I was tossing and turning with infinite sadness in my heart. It is already "tomorrow".I held a pair of sharp scissors in my hand, and unconsciously, one at a time, I cut the umbrella to death.The purple bamboo handle and eighty-four-bone good umbrella I hid.Everything changed because of it, I cut it into pieces viciously and sternly, scattered it all over the ground, and turned it into dust.I don't want it to flaunt before my eyes. Closed up, it is a dense net and a secluded tower, but opened up, it is a life of flesh and blood.The heart and soul tossed and rolled within its sphere of influence, and it was beyond redemption. Ah, looking back, forget it, what's the point? ——I tried every means to convince myself. After Suzhen recuperated overnight, Xu Xian took care of her in every possible way, and the two felt like a spring breeze. I greeted me with a smile: "Let's go, let's go to offer incense while the weather is good. My sister killed the giant snake and kept the house safe, so we should also reward God?" Bai Suzhen went back to her room to change clothes, Xu Xian came to tease her secretly: "My lady is not suspicious." I said coldly: "I don't mean it." "I am, Xiaoqing, why did I change my face overnight?" He grasped the stolen time, "I can't be sorry to you." I struggled to regain my hand. "I despise a man who fails his wife." "Why such a contradiction?" He whispered innocently to me, "I'm only a flesh and blood—" "Don't disregard morality, please let me go!" I said, "It's all a misunderstanding." Zijin Nunnery, a famous temple built in the Tang Dynasty, is located in Ximaowu, Dongting. In this dynasty, Lei Chao and his wife, famous folk sculptures, carefully sculpted the eighteen arhat statues of Avalokitesvara. People from far and near All pay homage. We walked into the main hall and saw three big Buddhas, with serene faces, sitting on the lotus seat.Looking at the sea, Avalokitesvara has a graceful expression.The red and green canopy flutters in the breeze, helping all living beings in the sea of ​​suffering. Could it be that we are also sentient beings in a sea of ​​suffering?The eighteen arhats in front of me are also laughing at me for being passionate and self-sufficient?The door gods, eyebrows, appraising wine, embracing knees, crouching tigers, subduing dragons, admiring, contemplating... kindly laughing, in my eyes, they are all mocking. It is a place where incense is at its peak, and there are endless books and empty seals.The misty mist in the room is dazzling and tear-jerking. I waited for the incense, Suzhen piously reported: "...I only hope that in the future..." Don't remember the past, only wish the future. Xu Xian's face was floating in the mist, like a mirage.So close, so far away.I was dizzy for a while. I told him: "My lord swears." "Swear?" His expression changed. "Stay true to my sister." "My oath—in my heart!" Xu Xian glanced at Suzhen, "You don't have to stand before God." "I believe you are." Suzhen said. "Since it's in the heart, it's better to speak to the gods, and the words are the voice of the heart, so speak!" Spare no effort to urge. "—" "Say it!" I forced him. I resolutely forced him to go all out, and there was no room for change.I will rely on the strength of God. "Just a few words: If I, Xu Xian, betray Bai Suzhen's ambitions, love and love will disappear, and I will die without a place to die. Just say it. Say it!" I secretly became hysterical. Xu Xian looked at me incredulously. There was a trace of mockery on the corner of my mouth: "Didn't my husband know how to swear in the past? Don't you like to talk about your whole life..." I forced myself to be naughty, "Why is it so difficult to say it again?" Xu Xian said: "I—" "Let me swear!" Suzhen said in the most peaceful tone in the world, "If I, Bai Suzhen, have something to do to my husband, call me dead—" Xu Xian didn't care about the dense population of Zijin nunnery, and the constant stream of faithful men and women, he was shocked after all, he was spurred by primitive emotion, she was so kind to him!Unwilling to be reconciled to future generations, he said: "Lady, I, Xu Xian, swear before the gods, if... if there is anything I'm sorry for you, tell me—" "Okay, forget it, Guanyin Arhat only cares about you two, and has no time to listen to others." "Xiaoqing, let me finish this sentence, you shut up!" Xu Xian stopped me to smooth things over, and he intentionally made me listen: "Tell me to die without a place to die!" Well, the overall situation is settled. When and how did it all start?How can my heart bear to pursue?Ending and starting are actually equally difficult. Before I fall to Suzhen's level—the point where I can't turn back, I'm better than her!I can bear it, and it becomes huge again for a while. I am in the mood to give her the icing on the cake. He took a lottery and handed it to Xu Xian. "My husband," I said with a smile, "How about asking for a lottery? Let's see how you two end happily." Xu Xian no longer wants to fight, maybe he is disgusted with my hospitality. "No, don't you know our ending?" "Come on, when you enter the temple, everyone asks for a lottery." He shook the stick casually, so as to entertain the two women beside him.After a while, a lot fell, which was the eighth. Of course Xu Xian didn't know that the eighth branch was to draw a lottery. I snatched it, hurriedly took the lottery paper, and threw him before God.Still smiling, he said: "Don't come here, I will release the sign for you two later." The eighth branch was originally "Dove Occupying the Magpie's Nest", and the signature said: "Mingjiu competes for the magpie's nest, and the guests and hosts are uncomfortable. The mountains are full of trees, pines and radish. How about the poetry?" ——My Heart Drama jump, how can it be announced? Xianji said: "There is no boat in the sea of ​​love, and there are eighteen fates." It all started with a small boat in the Sea of ​​Love on the West Lake, and the fate ends at eighteen?Calculating with one's fingers, there are more than a year.I was too horrified to speak.At that moment, with a wave of his hand, the lottery became the eighteenth lottery—ah, no, the eighteenth lottery was also a lottery, which was "Cuckoo's cry of blood, startled by cold dreams".And changed it to the twenty-eighth branch, which is just Zhongping. Finally, I picked a good lottery, which was thirty-eight. Under the change of numbers, thirty-eight is considered auspicious.I read to Xu Xian: "Sanggong, look at what you asked for. It's 'Yuanming Appreciating Chrysanthemums'." Suzhen said: "Take a look." She smiled, and whispered in her husband's ear: "When I come back, the officials are idle, and the room can accommodate my knees. It's safe. Nanchuang Jiao talks about poetry and wine, leaning on the leaning Look at the mountains." "Sister," I pretended to be happy for her, "is this signature forever?" "How do you know?" She glanced at Xu Xian. Gradually, gradually, she became a dependent wife.Can't see through my subtotal.I tightly wrapped Suzhen's hand, and Suzhen tightly wrapped my hand, and stepped out of Zijin Nunnery. Xu Xian's expression was uncertain. The sun went down like a glorious death.From a distance, it looks like a plump, chubby red grave, where my absurd first love was buried.I use the greatest price to prove: everything is a lie. What did i do wrong?What did Suzhen do wrong?Who lied to whom? Didn't Xu Xian notice it? When the love is strong, the love turns thin. It was too strong, Suzhen's love for him was almost flattering, suffocating him.Did you sleep well?What's for dinner?A bowl of hot soup was blown to cool before handing it over, and a piece of clothing was measured from left to right.Suzhen asked him all day, what is the name of the child? No matter where he touched her or said any kind words, she wanted to cry.Lost and found, especially cherished, and dare not be trapped as a taboo - the difficulty of women. As soon as summer comes, not only the appetite is greatly reduced, but also it is difficult to sleep well at night.Depressedly passed by day by day. This is the fault of Xia Xia. Who knows if it's because of summer, or frustration? Don't be idle.After a catastrophe, everything returns to the old view, to be idle all the time, to be idle until he dies... a boring wandering life.The teasing of love.The inferiority complex of a loser.I don't want to be at home at all. I had no choice but to follow the etiquette and customs of Suzhou people to deal with the summer, and drink "Qijia tea". I don't know if this custom is effective, but they are used to it, probably for thousands of years.People are used to many things, they are too lazy to pursue the reasons, and they dare not violate them. Because they do not intend to think of new things to evolve into habits, they follow them from generation to generation.They actually believed that the sky of love was made by Nuwa, and the sea of ​​hatred was made by Jingwei.Each person can only love one person in a lifetime - the above is the habit of the Chinese. On this day, I went out as usual and asked my neighbors for tea.Tea leaves from no less than seven families are mixed together, and the "door support charcoal" piled up on the door wall last year is used to cook tea and drink, which can relieve summer heat and illness. I begged from family to family, and the farther I went, the better.A porcelain bowl is used to hold scattered and scattered tea leaves.What kind of tea is also available, mixed into a roll. The sky of love is filled by Nuwa, and the sea of ​​hatred is filled by Jingwei.To love someone for a lifetime is the absolute truth. "Xiaoqing!" Someone called me from behind. Looking back suddenly, that person was Xu Xian.Compared with the first time, he was old, ordinary, and short of breath. He followed me around the door to beg for tea? Every household begged for tea from every household along the door.Maybe it's not a bargain, but in the end, the result is just an "exchange" without any loss.There is no choice, loss, or stagnation in the middle. "What's the matter? My husband." "It's okay," he said, and paused, "I just want to call your name." I didn't answer. Everything is up to him.He knocked on Mama Wang's door and asked for a pinch of tea with a smile.He said again: "Is Mama Wang coming to my house to ask for tea in the afternoon? I'll give you a good Biluochun." "Xiaoqing, thank you. How is your sister?" While our mother-in-law and mother were exchanging greetings, Xu Xian turned his back and stood far away, pulling up the weeds struggling to grow in the cracks in the wall.The faint smell of green grass, the unspeakable depression, the contradictions of his flesh and blood—this is the trouble of being a human being. I can't bear it.