Chapter 11 eleven

Xingzi didn't come after all.He sat alone in the room motionless.In fact, he also expected such a result, but he still insisted on hoping for something.Jie believes that Xingzi's attachment to him is no less than his love for her, although Xingzi always rejects him. He thinks that there are two things that he regrets in his life: one is the foolish love with Shui Xiang, and the other is that he didn't go to college.At that time, Xingzi said that he was too worried, that he was indecisive, and that he forgot about big things when he saw small gains.I thought, I'm afraid I'm too clever, I only believe in my own intelligence and don't believe in anything else, and in the end I was mistaken by my own intelligence.

When Xingzi took the newspaper for the college entrance examination and rushed all the way to find him, he was pulling the cart.After Ji put down the handlebar and read the message word for word, his heart was shocked.Xingzi's eyes lit up, and Xingzi said, "Xingzi, you must take the exam. Let's review together." Ji is also very excited.He said, "Of course I will take the exam. How do I review? Would you like to come to my house at night?" Xingzi left happily, but Jie still went to tow his cart.As he dragged and dragged, his heart became clouded again.I thought, am I dreaming again?Am I fantasizing again?who am iWhat qualifies me for college?Haven't I tasted what it's like to be brushed off?If I'm not allowed to go, why make people laugh at me?

When unloading the car, he told Yongzhi about the college entrance examination and his own thoughts. Yongzhi said: "Don't let people scold you during the political trial and don't take a picture of yourself, just rely on your counter-revolutionary father. I really want to go to college." Before Yongzhi's words, he was completely discouraged.Just at the end of work that day, the station manager Wang Liu came to find him.Wang Liu said, "The company is going to hold a theoretical study class, and the website recommends you to go there. Wang Liu also said that according to his consistent performance, after the study class is over, he intends to appoint him as the team leader of Team A. When it's time, Wang Liu will still take pictures. Pat him on the shoulder and said: "Young man, work hard, you will have a bright future. "

I have never had such good luck.He thought, if the university does not admit him, and it is said here that he is not at ease at work and does not value him anymore, then he will have to pull a scooter for the rest of his life.After all, going to college is a slim thing, but going to theoretical classes and being a team leader is real. So he made up his mind.Xingzi was extremely disappointed.Xingzi is very powerful, he talked a lot.I don't accept it.He even thought, you, a woman, don't know how difficult it is for a person like me to open up the situation a little bit.I thought, even if I get the best grades in the exam, the university is not sure about me.what does my father do

Xingzi was admitted to the university in one go, and among the people I knew, there were also people with very poor grades who were also admitted to the university, and the questions of the college entrance examination were so simple.I am sorry.But in the end, he became the team leader, and a leader of the company said at the meeting that he was a good young man.Wang Liu also asked Xiao to write an application for joining the party.These things quickly diluted my regret for not going to university. I thought that without going to university, people can do great things. Hua Luogeng never went to university, and neither did Gorky. Society is a big school.

It was too late when I really realized my childishness and superficiality. He said to himself, if he was a college student of a prestigious university instead of the captain or assistant of a transport team, would Xingzi reject him like he is now? The answer is no.He thinks that the fragrance of water is certainly a factor, but it is not the most important. Ji asked himself again, can I give up Xingzi?Looking for a girl who is acceptable in all aspects to start a family?Treat Xingzi as a long-term friend like you said? The answer is still no.He has an indescribable desire for Xingzi, the more Xingzi refuses, the stronger this desire is, and what drives him to pursue is not only emotion, but also purpose.Although he said that as long as Xingzi allows him to love her, he will be satisfied, but in fact, Jie knows that this is impossible.He thought he was unwilling to be defeated like this.Now that he has expressed his heart to Xingzi, and at the same time he knows how Xingzi is struggling in his heart, then he is determined to capture her.He should be such a person: If you love something, you must get it.

Xingzi didn't come, so I gave up the last bit of fantasy, and he started to make the bed and sleep.At the moment when he leveled the mat, someone knocked on the door, and he jumped up impulsively and opened the door vigorously. Standing at the door was Ji's father.His face was flushed, and his breath smelled of alcohol. He couldn't hide his disappointment, a deep disappointment. Father said: "What? You hate me so much?" Ji said, "Why? I just thought it was Xingzi." Father said: "Xingzi is your fiancée? He said, "Not yet" Father said, "I often hear you mention her, are you unrequitedly in love with her?"

Ji said, "That's right, but I'm not worthy." My father said, "Why are you so short on your ambition?" Ji said, "She's a college student, so what am I!" Father said, "Have you proposed to her?" Ji said, "I begged, but she didn't agree." Father said: "Forget it, you are a big man, where can you not find a good woman?" Ji said: "I said so, but I can't let it go. Xingzi has a different meaning to me than other women." The father looked at him mockingly, and Fang said, "You have something wrong!"

He smiled and didn't say anything, he thought his father would not understand him. My father went to the kitchen to look around, and when he came back, he said, "Your mother has gone out? Did you have a girlfriend? What time is it?" I was dissatisfied, so I said: "Can't you say something nice to Mom? She has suffered for you all her life." My father said: "This is unreasonable. She is for me, and for whom am I? Maybe I am enjoying happiness in this life? Even if she is suffering for me, I wrote to ask her to divorce, why is she not willing? Ji said: "Mom is thinking about us three brothers and sisters."

My father said: "So, if a person is always thinking of others, the only one who is unlucky is herself. Think about it, there must be some people who are lucky and some are unlucky in this world. She doesn't allow others to be unlucky, so she has to keep it to herself." He was very angry and funny at his father's statement.I think my father's selfishness has reached perfection.It cannot but be said that father's reasoning is logical.Ji said, "Since you have such a deep understanding, why have you been so unhappy all your life?" My father said: "The reason is that all political movements do not follow logic. They are free-spirited, and you can't hide when they hit you. Fortunately, I left. Otherwise, I would have died during the Cultural Revolution?"

Ji nodded silently, thinking that his father had only grasped a little ability to protect himself. The father said again: "Your mother, she always talks about doing things for others. As a result, did she make your life better for the three of you? No, did she make me live better? No. She didn't get divorced. , She got the benefit alone. This means that everyone sympathizes with her, everyone praises her for bearing the humiliation, and she has gained a reputation." He was taken aback, but when he recalled his father's words, he felt that although his mother was a little wronged, his father's words were really reasonable. My father said: "So I don't thank her. Remember, for a man, there is no need to talk about love or not. When the lights are off, all women in the world have the same taste." Ji smiled.Ji said, "You can think about it, so why are you looking for your mother?" My father said, "I don't want to chat with her, work or sleep. I can always ask her for a divorce, right?" Ji said, "Divorce? You're crazy! Why do you do this?" The father said: "It's very simple. She doesn't want a husband, but I want a wife. I haven't had a wife for more than 20 years. I want one now." He said, "Who are you marrying?" My father said: "There will always be someone. I now pay more than 100 yuan a month, and I have a house. It is not too difficult to find a companion to warm my feet." He said. "I really can't imagine that you are so daring and decisive, you can see everything and let go." My father said, "It's okay if you know each other. I just did what a person should do, and I didn't go out of my way at all." Ji nodded silently. My father said, "I advise you to have a good relationship with me, it will only do you good." Ji said, "You are my father, and I admire you. But I love my mother more, and you will never reach her position." The father didn't wait for the mother to come, so he had to leave.Before leaving, when I saw that I was in a daze, I said again: "Remember, don't worry about a woman. When the lights are turned off, women are the same, but what men need most is a woman after turning off the lights, and nothing else matters. ." I thought, it really is so, but I am not reconciled to it.