Chapter 29 Chapter Seven 1

Wang Xianke and Caiping are looking for Wushuang in Xuanyang. I think Xuanyangfang is a strange place. No one can tell what happened here. It's like Alice in Wonderland. Who knows what will happen next.But Wang Xianke didn't think so.Wang Xianke felt that everything was well planned.He lived in the big house in Xuanyangfang, and felt that the days passed quickly.The process of finding Wushuang is like ants going through a maze.At the beginning, there seemed to be many forks in the road, and each road was a difficult choice.First of all, he had to make sure he was awake, then he had to make sure that Wushuang existed, and finally he had to decide where to find Wushuang.Now that all these problems are solved, only one last question remains: where is Wu Shuang.Wang Xianke felt that he was rushing towards the answer with acceleration in the dark, and now it was as boring as reading a mystery novel that missed the answer.Except for some details, there is nothing that can arouse Wang Xianke's interest.These details are as follows: After finding Wushuang, will she pounce over with a yell, or will she sit cross-legged and wipe her tears on the spot; how will she treat Caiping; whether she will go back to live in Xuanyangfang; etc.There is no great difficulty behind these details.Wushuang used to be quite simple-minded, except for dyeing her hair green to play with Boss Luo, hanging on to his father's shoulders, leaving a few things in Boss Sun's inn and going back to get them back, she couldn't think of any new tricks.

This feeling resonates with me.When I was not married, I also felt that life was passing slowly, as if there was an endless time; now I feel that I am diving into old age and death.There were times when time passed more slowly, even when it was difficult.For example, when I was seventeen, sitting in the examination room of a math competition, I was faced with five weird questions, holding my breath like I was constipated, and slowly wrote down five weird solutions, just like pulling out five hard prongs. Incomparably like shit.The clock seemed to stop ticking.No thought now passes so slowly through the rectum of thought, and the clock moves as fast as a bowel movement.When you think about one thing endlessly, time is endlessly extended.These two things are so complementary that people can never forget the old saying that there seems to be God's will in the dark.

I used to think that the difference between us and the gangsters was the speed of the clock.I have spent thousands of sleepless nights thinking, each night is as long as a hundred years, but my hair is not yet gray.But traitors always like to say this: time is so fast, you will grow old in a flash!But now I don't watch it that way, because now when I watch TV series, fifty or sixty episodes go by in a flash.If you don't overturn your previous views, you have to admit that you are also a traitor. Caiping tells Wang Xianke Wushuang's tricks.Wushuang always said this: go and play with them.Then he dyed his hair green and ran out.If these things get to her mother's ears, she will be punished.But the most incomprehensible thing is that Caiping was punished for the trouble caused by Wushuang: kneeling on the washboard in the sun on a hot day, or being hung from the beams in the woodshed.At this time, Wushuang came to pretend to be a good person.In the former case, she said: I'll bring you a bowl of mung bean soup!In the latter case, she said: Wanna pee?I'll get you the urinal, and I don't care about shitting.Caiping said that it would be bad luck to follow her.When she was hung on the beam, she refused to accept Wushuang's urinal, but swung like a pendulum, kicked her with flying legs, and cursed: "Little bitch, you killed me! It's going to be broken!I'm going to die of pain, how about you?But she can't kick Wushuang, because Wushuang has discovered that when a person is hung on a certain point on the beam of the house, what he can kick is a spherical surface in the air in the room, and the ball is centered on the place where the rope is hung. The center of the sphere, the length of the rope plus the length of the suspended person's body is the radius of the sphere.As long as you retreat to the corner of the room and sit down, you'll be safe.For this reason, Wushuang came to visit Caiping with a small bench.She retreated to the corner of the room and sat down, and said: Don't just say that I hurt you, you also think about me, is it good to be a young lady?This question is a summary of the following facts: To be a lady from a famous family requires all kinds of cruel training, and the difficulty is no less difficult than that of a person who wants to be the champion of martial arts.For example, sitting upright in the boudoir every morning for five hours without saying a word or moving, so that the mice in the hole can come out to play with confidence.At the same time, I have to eat a stomach full of fried soybeans and drink a few large glasses of cold water to practice holding my fart.To be a famous lady, you must have a strong anal sphincter.All the ladies in Chang'an can crush a nut in that part, so they don't need a nutcracker either.Thinking of this, Caiping felt that it was understandable for Wushuang to go mad and go out to make trouble every once in a while; she had nothing to complain about being hanged to the beam because of this.

Then Caiping calmed down, straightened her whole body like a suffering saint, lowered her head forward, and her loose hair hung down like a waterfall in front of her face.Wushuang stood up and said, Caiping, you look very good now.Just don't move, I'll call my cousin!She ran away after speaking. Wang Xianke also remembered this incident. When he came, he saw Caiping hanging in a half-lit woodshed. Her white clothes were like snow, her black hair was like lacquer, and the lines on her body were smooth. The whole scene was like an ink painting.You can buy such paintings in Chang'an City for 30 yuan a piece. They are watermarked and printed on rice paper.But the person on the screen is not Caiping, but Yu Xuanji.After she said that she would look better when she wanted to die, the prisoners kicked her out of the cell with a donkey stick, washed her with well water several times, and hung her into the pavilion in the courtyard.Those people said that after so many days curled up in the small cell, people curled up too, and it was for your own good to hang yourself.After hearing such words, Yu Xuanji just lowered his head and didn't say a word.Seeing that she didn't speak, the guards said, "I've been locked up for so many days. Hanging alone may not be enough."We have torture beds, and we hold hands at one end and feet at the other, and even the natural hunchback can be straightened.It's the one-hundred-twenty-decibel scream when straightened that makes people unbearable.These words forced Yu Xuanji to raise his head and said: It's fine if I hang up, don't bother the uncles.Thank you uncles.After hearing these words, some cell bosses turned around and ran back to the house, laughing wildly.Come out again after laughing.This is because there is still much to be done.At that time, everyone in Chang'an City knew that this romantic Taoist nun was going to be punished, so they all wanted to see her.Everyone bought a one-dollar ticket at the entrance of the prison, and then formed a long queue, passing through many corridors and corridors, and finally turned to the courtyard to have a look at Yu Xuanji, and then turned out; all prison staff have the ability to maintain order. Responsibility, I can't patronize myself and laugh.On that day, a painter bought a seat in the courtyard and painted this handed down work there.Needless to say, he made a fortune out of it.

Wang Xianke still remembered that he, Wushuang and Caiping went to Boss Sun's place to stay at the inn.The reason for these things is that Wushuang wants to know whether it hurts to do that thing, so she uses Caiping as an experiment.The location of the experiment is inconvenient at home, so I often go to Boss Sun's shop to open a room.Even when she was doing this kind of thing, she never forgot to play tricks on Boss Sun, and often threw things for Boss Sun to pick up, so he was surprised and delighted.Then she came running to get them back, and he was like a concubine again.No matter how many times he played this trick, Boss Sun would still be surprised and delighted, as if mourning.So Wushuang said: I understand now, it turns out that people are exactly like pigs, born with no memory at all!If it was two years ago, I would completely agree with Wushuang.But I can't agree 100% now.I can't say anything about people's memory, but the pigs must be defended.When I was still a little nervous, I once borrowed a set of Freud's complete works and read them carefully.Mr. Fu has a saying that if people live in an irresistible pain, they will regard this pain as happiness.If you are a pig living in a dark pigsty, you will regard eating pig food as a great happiness, so you forget that you will be stabbed sooner or later.So the pig's memory is forced to be like this, it cannot be said that it is inherently bad.