Chapter 4 sprouting evil thoughts

In any case, the slap on Yang Mawa completely opened the boundary between me and my colleagues and classmates. The people in the school all came to the conclusions they should have gotten, and the order in the school continued according to the pattern of his father in the past. Yang Mawa dropped out of school.After the day when he was beaten, he didn't come to school again, and went uphill with his father to dig the ground. The reactions that were quickly fed back to my ears from all corners of the village were absolutely one-sided.No one sympathized with Yang Mawa. I heard that even his father scolded him for not knowing the depth.The deacon Yang Buming ran to the school that afternoon and supported me: "Good fight! After studying for several years, I don't even know how to be polite, and I don't have any rules! If I don't fight, the world will be turned upside down tomorrow!" He deliberately shouted Speak so that the dolls sitting in the school can hear you.Not only the deacon Yang Buming, but almost all the peasants who sent their children to school, in the streets and alleys where I came and went, all supported my move to move the board.However, I knew in my heart that no one would sympathize with deviant actions that disrespected teachers, so I was not surprised.

I don't regret Yang Mawa's dropout either.According to the unique curriculum created by my grandfather in this school (later supplemented by my father), the elementary school students start to read from one, two, three, four, five, and then learn, and learn "Seven Characters Magazine" in the middle grades, about three years .The additional course is abacus calculation, first learn addition and subtraction, and then learn "Nine Returns".In three years, the descendants of those poor peasants, after learning the miscellaneous characters used in daily life and doing abacus, they went out of school to do crops with their father and brother, or went to a shop or workshop in Xi'an to work as husbands ( Apprentice) went.The children of a few well-to-do households were left behind, and then they started to open and further their studies step by step.This set of tutorials, created by my grandfather, is very popular among farmers. It can be said that it is suitable for both rich and poor. It has been popularized and improved. It has taken care of the "noodles" and guaranteed the "points".Yang Mawa should have dropped out of school to work as a farmer or a husband-in-law, but she was born short, and her parents felt sorry for her lack of energy, so they told him to stay in school for a few more years... sooner or later, she would have to leave.

Two months passed without any accidents and the order was normal. The deacon Yang Buming praised my father several times: "The cultivation is good!" My father was naturally very pleased.I also feel good about myself.When I walk through the village, I can take a slow and measured step, and I am no longer nervous.I sat straight at the front of the desk for a while, reading or giving lectures, and I no longer felt sore and tired.People say that I look exactly like my dad twenty years ago!He even has the same temper as my dad. I also realized that my temper had changed.I loved to laugh when I was young. My mother said that I had the face of a smiling Bodhisattva, and there were two dimples on my cheeks when I smiled. My father had trained me a lot for my love of laughing, saying that I had a face that was not stupefied. I especially hate the two unlucky dimples on my face... Now that I get rid of the problem of laughing, the dimples naturally rarely appear. I am facing a group of students with different personalities. The power of deterrence is not enough. My father said that he must never laugh and laugh with the students, and he will lose his power if he laughs.Another reason that is inconvenient to say is that since my daughter-in-law got married and came in, I couldn't laugh anymore.

She came in a sedan chair and walked into the wing room with the support of the bridesmaids. As soon as I lifted the red cloth covering her face, my beating heart suddenly sank, and I couldn't get up again.I really can't predict that my father will marry me back with such a daughter-in-law.Of course, I dare not contradict my father's peculiar theory. Thinking about my current status in Yangxu Village and the prestige established by the three generations of the Xu family in Yangxu Village, I feel very heavy in my heart. I can't shame my ancestors , let alone indulge in female sex and destroy the spirit of "Du Geng" on the gate of Xu's house in my hands, and the position and proportion of this woman are cut off at once.

When I came home from school, she greeted me timidly: "Sir, have dinner." She never dared to look me in the eye.When I realized that she was looking at me, when I turned my head, she immediately averted her gaze.She won't let go of her beauty, she can only light fires, wash pots, wash dishes, sew clothes, and make shoes.I didn't speak, and she didn't speak, probably because I was afraid that what I said would be inappropriate, and I would have nothing to say when I saw her, so the small wing was always quiet. The dissatisfaction of the spouse and the inconsistency between husband and wife were diluted by the enthusiasm and interest of the new teaching job. I think I like teaching very much.The success of this aspect is mixed with the failure of the other. I just live like this, and I don’t feel that I can’t live. Although life seems rigid, it is also peaceful.

My peaceful state of mind was suddenly broken! When school was over that day, it was raining, and the heavy rain made white blisters on the ponded water in the yard.Regardless of the rain and the slippery road, the college students shrank their necks and ran out of the school. There was a mess of puffing footsteps in the yard, and only a few little dolls hid under the eaves of the door, not daring to go out.I stood up, stretched my waist, walked to the eaves, and advised the little dolls to wait a little longer until the rain stopped.At this time, a woman in a cheongsam came into the school yard, her head and face covered by a red paper umbrella.But I have already recognized that this is Yang Guinian's second daughter-in-law.I turned around and walked back to the school, sat down on the chair.

When the woman walked to the door of the school, her son had already jumped to her lap and hugged her waist.While touching the child's head, she said with a pleasant smile: "Give this umbrella to your husband, and you and your mother will have an umbrella." I immediately stood up from the chair, declined, and asked her and the child to hold an umbrella each, and I will not leave until the rain stops.Her son put the umbrella on the table and jumped out the door. She took his hand, turned around and walked away. In the muddy water of the yard, she carefully chose a place where she could set her feet and walked out of the yard.The remaining three or five little dolls probably thought that their parents would not bring umbrellas or straw hats, so they ran away in the rain.

The classroom fell silent, and I was left alone, looking at the red paint paper umbrella on the table.I picked up the umbrella and weighed it in, but I smelled a faint fragrance, which was the alluring smell of makeup and powder.I was sitting on the chair, and there were two watery eyes in front of my eyes. If I hadn't seen her eyes so close, I really didn't know that there were such beautiful eyes in the world.She was wearing a purple red cheongsam, with curly hair, thin skin and tender flesh. She was only twenty-four or five years old, and the cheongsam tightly wrapped her plump breasts and buttocks.I suddenly thought strangely, if I had such a beautiful woman, would I really be wasting my studies?

The rain had subsided, and the rippling rain and mist shrouded the dense treetops, making the yard dark.I took one last look at the red umbrella, finally didn't use it, locked the door, and walked home. After about ten days, or half a month, she walked into the school holding the child's hand.Standing in front of my teaching desk, she reprimanded her son for wanting to play truant, so she brought him here with her own hands.I asked her son to sit down.But she didn't leave, she took out a piece of paper from her waist, spread it out on the table in front of me, and asked, "Mr. Xu, how do you pronounce this word?"

As soon as I looked up, I found that she was not looking at the words, but looking into my eyes, and there was a touching look in those eyes.I hurriedly answered the pronunciation of that word, and avoided my face.She smiled, said "excuse me" and walked out the door. From then on, whenever I walked past the gatehouse of Yang Guinian's house, I couldn't help but turn my head and glance at the deep courtyard.In the past, I, like my father, would not bother to take a look at this magnificent gatehouse with a corner pavilion style.Glanced, but saw nothing.On this day, he finally bumped into her at the door.I nodded to her and walked over, but she called out again: "Mr. Xu—" I stopped and turned around.

"The child has a stomachache and won't be able to go to school later." "That's good. Let the baby rest at home." "Missing get out of class..." "The baby is cured, and I will make up for it." "I'm so sorry for you!" "You're welcome." When I got home, those two watery eyes flickered in front of my eyes; when I was in school, those two eyes blinked again between the lines... That night, when I came home, I saw my father came back from plowing with a displeased face, and knocked the plow stick heavily on the steps.When he returned home, he had already done the farming in person like his uncle and uncle.Are you tired and irritable? Until the dead of night, when my uncle and my cousins ​​were all asleep, my father finally called me into the upper room, closed the door, and kept his voice down, sternly: "What do you have to say to that stinky bitch? Ok?" I felt as if I had been hit by a brick, my eyes were darkened, and I said, "She asked for leave for the child..." "I don't want you to talk back!" Father stood up, eyes like a frightening eagle, "I just want to tell you, if that bitch talks to you again, you don't make sense! That's a goblin, a ghost! You should respect yourself some!" I lowered my head, feeling ashamed, as if I had already had some trouble with that woman, but in fact, it was just two or three conversations, all about her child's schooling, each time it was as simple as that A few words.I wanted to argue and explain that it wasn't just that my father was so angry that he couldn't bear it, but that I felt embarrassed and ashamed to speak. "Let's go!" Father waved his hand angrily. I don't know how I got from the upper room where my father lived to the back room to my own wing.After lying down, I couldn't fall asleep, my heart was hot and stuffy, and my head was buzzing. This woman was the young wife married by Yang Guinian's second son in Henan, and she was sent back to her hometown because of the tense war.Yang Guinian didn't know that his son had already married a young woman, so he was so angry that he blew his beard and stared at him, but the woman brought a cute little grandson, after all, he was a descendant of the Yang family, so she took him in, but he couldn't see this fucking thing in his heart A woman with a foreign accent.The old woman who was married by the Ming media hated this younger sister even more.This woman lived in the Yang family without any assistance or sympathy, and her life was lifeless. People in the village said that she cried secretly every night!People in the village didn't know the details, and there were many rumors that the foreign woman sent back from Henan by Yang Guinian's second son was a woman from a good family who was robbed; ...and so on. No matter how blunt and unbearable my father's attitude was, after calming down, I couldn't help but secretly admire his penetrating eyes. The watery eyes really made me a little distracted.If it wasn't for my father's warning, if things go on like this, even if it doesn't lead to any scandalous things that will damage the family style, it will be extremely dangerous. Any bit of gossip may ruin me, my father, and the Xu family. The family tradition established by generations of observance of chastity and ritual... The brick that my father hit me directly on the forehead was ruthless and timely. My heart was shrinking, and the cloud of confusion stirred up by that foreign woman dissipated.I no longer paid attention to the woman whom my father called a goblin or a ghost, and even all the young women in the village.I can't let peachy desecrate the chaste gatehouse of the Xu family... Yangxu Village was liberated, and the people's government sent three gentlemen to Yangxu Village, which really opened my eyes.They wore short jackets with four pockets and octagonal hats. They abolished my teaching materials and distributed textbooks compiled by the Northwest Military and Political Committee to the students. They set up Chinese and arithmetic classes, and taught music, physical education, and drawing separately. One of the young Female sir, teach children to sing, sing and sing with their mouths open, which makes me dumbfounded. I automatically resigned.There is no way, I don't know how to do arithmetic, and I haven't even seen those Arabic characters; the new Chinese textbook, although it is plain and popular vernacular, I can't teach it.I left the school taught by three generations of my grandparents, and gave way to the three newly appointed new teachers, and went to farm with my father.I've taken off my blue robe, it's too inconvenient to wear it for work! Half a year later, one day later, my father and I were plowing the stubble in the field beside the official road in the west of the village. The township government correspondent sent a notice asking me to go to the normal school in the south of the city to study.going or not?Dare to go or not?Should we go or not?I can't make up my mind what to do.My father couldn't make up his mind, since the three new gentlemen entered Yangxu Village, his father sneered more than once: "Bouncing and jumping, walking and singing, singing and drinking, men and women, regardless of gender, want to strike up a conversation with everyone, what do you look like?" !” Now he understands that the teachers trained in normal schools must be like that, and I may be like that in the future, so he can’t make up his mind.For this matter, he made a special visit to the county education department, and when he came back, he made a decision: go! The night before my departure, I sat in the back room of the upper room where my parents lived, and listened carefully to my father's teachings before leaving, how to talk to the teacher, how to get along with classmates, and stay away from home.Mother went on to tell the trivial things in life, avoid eating raw and cold food, and pay attention to adding and subtracting clothes.My daughter-in-law stood aside blankly, looking anxious, and didn't interrupt. At this moment, she asked: "Which clothes should I prepare for my husband to go out?" I was taken aback.This is a matter temporarily ignored by my parents and myself. Should I wear a short jacket?Or robes?I thought about it and had no idea.Looking at my mother, my mother looked at my father, and it seemed that I didn't know what to wear.Father was grinding ink on the table, thought for a while, raised his head, and said to me, "Wear a blue robe." I was a little puzzled: "Dad, I see that the three new gentlemen from our village don't wear robes. They are liberated, and they don't like to wear robes anymore." "I've been liberated, but I didn't hear that you're not allowed to wear gowns!" My father said mockingly, "Look at those three foreign gentlemen, they wear short gowns, which are so short! The front crotch and rear hips are uncovered, which is out of style. How decent is it to be a role model for others!" The conclusion is foregone, wearing a blue robe, my daughter-in-law withdrew and prepared my luggage for tomorrow. Father had already sharpened the ink, took off the cap of the brush, and repeatedly traced the tip of the brush on the lid of the inkstone, then suddenly hung his wrist and wrote two words on a piece of hard paper: Shen Du.Wait until the ink dries up, hand it over to me, and look at me sternly and implicitly.I took the instructions written by my father with both hands, put them in the folded wallet, and put them in the pocket of my underwear, expressing that I must act cautiously in everything in a strange environment far away from my father, especially when I am alone. Alone, out of father's sight... In the morning light of the next day, I packed my luggage and set out on the road.When I walked out of the village for a long time, I looked back and vaguely saw the tall figure of my father standing on the side of the road at the entrance of the village. Because his back was facing the morning light from Dongshan, he was like an ancient black pagoda standing still. ... I turned around and left, feeling uneasy and hurried, what would the world waiting for me look like?I can't imagine it specifically... Anyway, going out this time became the first major turning point in my life... I can't speak, and I can't walk. When I stood at the front of the room and the head teacher introduced me to the whole class, I was almost dead of embarrassment. When Mr. Wang, the class teacher, led me into the classroom with the wooden sign of "Crash Class Two", there was a burst of laughter in the whole classroom, and the sound of laughter almost knocked me down.I immediately bowed my head, this meeting ceremony was too embarrassing.The teacher in charge waved his hand, dissuaded everyone in a slow and pleasant voice, not to laugh, and then briefly introduced my name and age to everyone, hoping that everyone and I could help each other and study well.I lowered my head and was dissatisfied with the class teacher. Facing a stranger, these people laughed wildly and talked like this, it's too rude!As a teacher, you don't give strict lectures, but just lightly dissuade, what kind of words?When you introduced it, the classroom was still muttering and discussing, what kind of words is this?What teaching order?So slack! After the introduction by the class teacher, a male student stood up and welcomed me to join the group. He was probably the monitor of the class.He is also casual: "Welcome Xu Shenxing to study in our class, to win glory for the second class, and to contribute to the education of the motherland! To sum it up in one sentence: On behalf of the whole class, welcome...Mr. Blue Robe!" Classroom Immediately there was a loud noise in the room, applause and laughter mixed together, it was very chaotic! I heard Mr. Wang, the head teacher, laughing too.I can't stand his laugh, he is Mr. after all.After laughing, he said, "Students, don't laugh, and don't call your new classmates random names..." I now understand why everyone is laughing, laughing at my blue cloth robe and the top hat on my head.I suddenly realized the difference between me and all my classmates. Boys and girls all wore uniforms or casual shirts, with octagonal caps on their heads, and girls had neck-length short hair or double braids.In Yangxu Village, the attire of the three new gentlemen became a topic of curiosity and discussion, and became a monster that my father ridiculed.In the classroom of the second crash course of the normal school, my attire turned into an antique monster!Fortunately, the class teacher pointed out an empty seat for me at this time, and I immediately walked down from the podium to escape this embarrassing place where everyone laughed.I walked to the seat, and there was a girl sitting in that seat. She smiled at me and expressed her welcome to be at the same table with me.My heart skipped a beat. This girl is so beautiful, with watery eyes.I didn't dare to take a second look, and immediately reflected in my mind the foreign woman whom Yang Guinian's second son sent back to Yangxu Village from Henan, and immediately reflected my father's warning: goblin!Ghost!Regarding this girl at the same table, this goblin and ghost has become a person who has had a profound impact on my life. I will talk about the entanglement with her later! I didn't look at her and sat down in my seat.Take out the school supplies from the book bag and put them in the desk drawer.At this time, my scalp felt cold, and someone took off the top hat. I had just shaved my head before leaving, so a clean bald head must be ugly, and there was laughter again and again in the classroom.Don't bully people!I got angry, turned my head angrily, and looked for the prankster. I even didn't hesitate to tear my face and give him an apology. How can I make a joke like this?I didn't find the hat, but I saw happy smiling faces all looking at me.When I turned around, I saw the top hat was wearing on top of her—my tablemate, pretending to make faces to everyone. I don't know what to do.The black wool top hat was buttoned on top of her head, and a row of long black hair was exposed underneath, which didn't seem funny, but made her look very good-looking.I couldn't vent the anger that was gathering in my heart, and I was too embarrassed to take it from her head.During the brief moment of my hesitation, someone in the back row took it off her head and put it on my own.After that, my top hat was snatched by many hands, and it was worn on top of boys and girls in rotation.I couldn't bear such an insult, so I sat on the stool angrily, and ignored it angrily. She finally felt that her behavior was a little too much, she left her seat, snatched the hat from a corner of the classroom, came from behind, put it on my head, said "I'm sorry", and sat down. I didn't move, didn't look at her, and expressed my anger in silence.So uneducated!When a big girl just met someone for the first time, she snatched someone's hat and put it on her head. What did she say?Crazy Zhang Yejiao! There is also the embarrassing thing that people have to go to the dining hall to eat, serve the rice bowl, line up with chopsticks, and go to the window to get food one by one.I stood in the queue, feeling very awkward.The students who had eaten in front, because there was no restaurant, squatted in a group in the yard, chatting and laughing while eating, and the female students were also caught in a group, laughing with their mouths full of food.I am very uncomfortable. These boys and girls who have undergone two years of intensive training will soon be teachers, but they are so informal.When I was at home, my father taught me the rules about eating since I was a child. I can only sit down after the elders sit down; After eating, you can pinch it by yourself; you can't stick out your tongue when eating, and you can't open your mouth too much, and you can't make any noise when chewing; you can't open your mouth to talk while filling the food.Now, look at these future gentlemen at dinner!He opened his mouth and smiled, with a pimple on his cheek, and the sound of eating, drinking and chewing filled the yard, exactly like the "Old Bowl Club" held by rural peasants in the village alley, without the gentleness that a gentleman should have . I made a meal, holding the bowl, but I couldn't squat down, so I simply brought it back to the classroom.Walking through the rows of classrooms, I heard suppressed laughter behind me. I turned around suddenly and saw a group of classmates following behind my buttocks, imitating my walking posture. The figure of eight steps...they burst out laughing.I really can't help it, I think they are rude, but they think I am funny and make fun of me everywhere!When I returned to the classroom, I was so angry that I lost my appetite. I still can't forget the first night I spent in the normal school dormitory. This kind of collective dormitory is the first time I have seen it.A row of houses, with windows on both sides, nailed into two rows of wooden boards, with a walkway in the middle, and another floor upstairs.Everyone folded his mattress into a narrow net, and the beds were crowded and crowded.I spread bedding in the jurisdiction of our class.Although it was late autumn, it wasn't cold. One by one, all the boys, stripped to a pair of underpants, scrubbed in the aisle, and poured dirty water into the seepage well outside naked. I felt even more awkward, sitting on the bed, looking at the bodies with masculine features exposed, I was very embarrassed for them.Ever since I became sensible, I have never spent the night outside.Even in summer, my father is not allowed to wear short sleeves and shorts, and cloth socks and shoes must be neatly dressed, so that the muscles that cannot be exposed are not allowed to be exposed.Now, seeing so many naked male bodies, I find it even more difficult to take off my clothes and undo my belts in person. I undressed quietly, and quickly got into the quilt, but I couldn't fall asleep. The noise of laughing and laughing seemed to disturb the nest of sparrows. Many people tried to joke and make everyone laugh. After the light-off bell rang, the lantern was blown out by the head of the dormitory, and the dormitory fell silent. A small, hoarse but clear voice spread in the dormitory, like the broadcast of a foreign radio station that people hear in the quiet of night—— "There is an ancient monastery in Nanshan. There lived an old monk and a young monk. The old monk led the young monk, chanting scriptures and Taoism all day long, cultivating one's morality and cultivating one's character. The young monk was picked up by the old monk and was abandoned by others. An orphan, homeless and rootless, grew up at the knees of the old monk. The old monk loved him very much and disciplined him very strictly. On the fifteenth day of the first lunar month, the ancient temple would push the young monk to the back hall. Lock it up so that he is not allowed to see the woman offering incense, so as not to be tempted. The young monk has never seen the opposite sex until he was twenty years old, and he is very innocent. The old monk is very proud that he has cultivated a real person with a pure heart and will never be seduced by worldly lusts. infected." "In order to test the purity of this young monk, the old monk led him down the mountain and walked into the bustling Xi'an East Street." "The old monk suddenly realized that the young monk was gone. When he turned his head, the young monk stood by the crossroads, staring blankly at a beautiful woman in a daze, with the saliva hanging from the corner of his mouth to his chest. When the old monk saw it, his face was distorted with anger. He walked up quickly, and he didn’t want to lose his temper in front of the people on the street, so he said sternly: ‘That’s the devil!’” "The little monk smiled foolishly: 'The devil is so cute! I want a devil...'" In the dormitory, there was suppressed laughter from upstairs and downstairs.My heart trembled, it seemed that the person who told the story was specially alluding to my compilation.The hoarse voice continued— "The old monk led the young monk back to the monastery, and taught him a lesson for three days and three nights, saying that the devil was abominable and abominable. The young monk didn't know what was going on in his heart, and expressed his hatred of the devil. After the old monk calmed down, he thought For the shortcomings in my own education methods, I can't just adopt the method of isolation, and I should let the young monks exercise their hearts of stone in the women's nest." "On the day of offering incense, the old monk asked the young monk to sit cross-legged on both sides of the altar like himself, with his hands closed and his eyes closed. In order to test the young monk's desire to see the woman offering incense, he placed a drum on the young monk's lap. .In order to avoid the little monk's suspicion, he also put a drum on his lap." "Women offering incense came in an endless stream. The old monk opened his eyelids slightly, and when he saw the young monk's eyes closed tightly, he closed them himself. After a while, the old monk heard the sound of a drum on the opposite side, and his heart was shocked. , Cursing secretly: "This boy's heart is moved! I counted my efforts in admonishment wasted!" When he opened his eyes to see, the little monk's eyes were still tightly closed, and the corners of his mouth were drooling. When two drums beat..." "After the offering of incense, all the tourists left. The old monk asked: 'What is beating the drum?' The young monk bowed his head and remained silent, feeling ashamed and unable to speak." "The little monk admired the master for practicing real kung fu. He knelt down and pleaded guilty before hearing the sound of the drum. After pleading guilty, before the old monk got up, he showed his courtesy and went to move the drum on the old monk's lap. Unexpectedly—— On that side, a big hole was poked..." The sudden burst of laughter finally drew the reprimand from the teacher on duty. My face was hot and ashamed, these uneducated people, teachers who will be teachers in the future, tell such obscene stories in the dormitory, it is too rude!I always suspect that the storyteller is alluding to me, no, it is an insult to my personality! I am depressed and lonely.When I walk, someone imitates and ridicules me behind my back; when I speak, someone imitates and makes fun of me;My biggest headache is music class and physical education class.As soon as I sang, everyone laughed, saying that my voice was "cast", and even the music teacher laughed.The physical education class was even more difficult. When I was wearing a robe to receive basketball training from the physical education teacher, the physical education teacher laughed so hard that I couldn't straighten up... Whenever I took these two classes, I called in sick. A long month has passed, and I have neither happiness nor warmth, and all my habits are completely out of order. In order to avoid the ridicule of everyone, I stay in the classroom all day and do not go out to avoid the mocking eyes of the students in other classes.I lost the confidence to continue studying. Thinking about the two years, it is really hard to grind to the end.I finally made up my mind to drop out of school and go home to work as a farmer. As soon as I entered the classroom in the morning, I saw many students watching the blackboard on the back wall.This blackboard is the "Life Corner", where the good people and good deeds of the class are posted, and there is probably some news.I walked up to take a look, and in the "New Classmate Profile" column, there was a paragraph that made fun of me.Because the students in this crash course are uneven, and students introduced from all sides are constantly interjected, so there is a "new classmate introduction column" here.Someone modified the text introducing me to this: "Xu Shenxing, word Kong fifty-six. Male, twenty-two years old. Birthplace: Shandong Confucian Mansion. Known as Mr. Lan Pao, he is actually the son of the Confucian family shop..." All the students in the classroom grinned at me with wide mouths. I didn’t have a fit, so I walked out of the classroom and asked the head teacher for sick leave. When I came back, I packed up the books and utensils, told the monitor that I had taken sick leave, and went back to the dormitory. I packed my luggage, and when the campus was quiet, I picked up my luggage and walked out through the back door.I hurriedly walked through the streets and alleys of Shanmen Town where the school was located, and walked east along the low embankment of the small river.I seemed to shake off the thorns all over my back, and finally escaped from those annoying mocking eyes.To be honest, they can't understand me, and I can't understand them!They can't tolerate me, and I can't tolerate their rude and uneducated behaviors! As I was walking, I heard someone calling my name from behind, and it was a woman's voice.As soon as I turned around, I stopped in surprise, and my deskmate Tian Fang was running up panting. "You...why are you leaving?" She ran over, stopped, with her hands on her hips, out of breath, anger, surprise and tenderness in her watery eyes, "Huh? You ran away?" "I don't want to study anymore." I was heartbroken and calm. "That won't work, you have to go back and tell the class teacher." She put down one hand and kept the other on her waist, "You don't even have discipline!" "Who are you?" I don't care, "Who cares about me?" "I'm a class leader!" She said confidently. I just remembered that she is the propaganda committee member in the class.I smiled disdainfully and said, "I'm going home to work on the crops!" "The country has just been liberated, and there is a shortage of people's teachers everywhere." She said, "The government collects educated young people everywhere and trains them intensively, but it can't meet the needs of rural schools. You are better...to be a deserter!" I thought, since the country needs me so much, why do you bully me?I still stared into the distance and insisted on leaving. "Chairman Mao of the Communist Party led us to make a revolution, turned over, liberated, and free! How happy we all are studying together!" She was promoting to me, "The students in our class are all children from poor families. If it weren't for the liberation , can you be so free? How can you go back?" I am used to hearing these great principles, but when she poured them out, they were not preaching, there was truth in them.Seeing that I didn't look back, she pulled the quilt from my back and said, "I came back from Shanmen Town to see a doctor and saw you walking out the east end of the street, so I will kick you out. If I don't drive you out, I will lose my job." The sense of responsibility of the cadres. If you must go, you should go back with me and say hello to the class teacher..." I had to walk back to school with her.