Chapter 18 Chapter two

The morning of the wedding was gloomy.The clouds were thick and the thunder was rolling.After the thunder, the rain poured down. Mother said: This Yuan Ji said that he picked an auspicious day for you, look, it's almost flooding Jinshan. At around ten o'clock in the morning, accompanied by her two cousins, Wang Renmei came to my house in the heavy rain.They were all wearing raincoats, as if they were going to the embankment to prevent flooding.In the yard, a shed was set up with plastic film, and a stove was temporarily set up inside. I squatted in front of the stove and pulled the bellows to boil water.The cousin's facial features were speechless, and he said: "The hero of the 'self-defense counterattack', the bride has already entered the door, why are you still squatting here to boil water?"I said: Then you come and burn it for me.He said: Madam arranged for me to set off firecrackers.Setting off firecrackers in heavy rain is a technical job.The mother stood at the door and shouted: "Five senses, don't play tricks, let it go."Wuguan took out a firecracker that had been covered with plastic paper from his arms, ignited the fuse, and carried it with his hands without using a pole. In the heavy rain, he held an umbrella and set it sideways.The gunpowder smoke could not be dispersed in the rain, and surrounded him in circles.The children who watched the excitement were all like drowned chickens, clapping their hands and stomping their feet, shouting: Five senses, five senses, hair full of smoke—what kind of words are these bratty children yelling!my mother said.

It is said that after the bride enters the courtyard, she should pass through the main room without saying a word, enter the bridal chamber, and lie on the kang with her legs, which is called "sitting on the bed". But Wang Renmei stood there as soon as she entered the hospital, watching the performance of the five sense organs.The gunpowder smoke smudged his facial features black, as if he had just emerged from a pot.Wang Renmei laughed out loud.Her sisters, who were maids of honor, quietly tugged at her sleeves, but she ignored them.She wore a pair of high-heeled plastic shoes, which made her look taller, like a tree.The facial features looked her up and down and said: Sister-in-law, if you want to kiss you, you have to step on a ladder! ——Five senses, shut up!my mother yelled!Wang Renmei said: Five senses, you fool!Wang Dan and Chen Bi didn't even need to step on a ladder to kiss - hearing the bride standing in the yard teasing her uncle, the aunts and wives whispered to each other.I got out of the shed with a coal shovel.The children clapped their hands and stomped their feet: the hero came out!Here comes the hero!

I was wearing a new military uniform, a third-class merit medal, a face full of soot, and a coal shovel in my hand, neither fish nor fowl.Wang Renmei smiled and bent over.My heart was in a mess, and I couldn't laugh or cry.This Wang Renmei seems to have a little nervous problem.Mother yelled: Get her in the house quickly!I said sarcastically: Madam, please enter the bridal chamber!Wang Renmei said: It's stuffy inside the house, but it's cool outside.The children clapped their hands and stamped their feet: Aww!Ow!Ow!I went back to the house and took out a scoop of candy, ran to the gate, and sprinkled it in the alley.The children rushed out in a swarm, fighting in the muddy water.I grabbed Wang Renmei's wrist and dragged her into the room.The door was too short, and it touched her forehead, and with a bang, she yelled: Oh, my mother, you broke my head!The aunts and aunts laughed up and down.

The room is very small, with so many people coming in, it's hard to move your back.The three of them took off their raincoats, which were drenched in water and had nowhere to hang them, so they had to hang them on the door frame.The ground is already wet, and everyone's feet have brought in mud, water, stirring and reconciling, and it's a mess.The house is small, the kang is less than two meters long, and on the top of the kang are four new quilts, two new mattresses, two blankets, and two pillows from Wang Renmei's family, almost reaching the paper ceiling.As soon as Wang Renmei's butt touched the kang mat, she called out: "Oh, my mother, what is this kang, it's obviously a hot pot!"

My mother became angry, and she pounded the ground with a walking stick and said, "It's the fire pot, you sit on it too, and I'll see if I can burn your butt!" Wang Renmei laughed again, and said to me in a low voice: Xiao ran, your mother is so funny!My ass is really hot, how can I give birth to a world champion? I almost fainted from anger, but it was an auspicious day and it was inconvenient to have an attack, so I stretched out my hand to try the kang mat, it was indeed hot.Because of the large number of guests at home, the seven aunts and eight aunts of the same family all came to eat, so the two pots and stoves in the main room were constantly burning, steaming steamed buns, cooking vegetables and cooking noodles, almost burning the kang mats.I dragged a quilt from the stack of quilts, folded it into a square, pressed it against the corner of the wall, and said: Madam, please sit up!Wang Renmei sneered, and said: Xiaopao, you are so funny, you call me a lady, you still call me daughter-in-law according to the custom of our place, or call me Renmei as before.I have nothing to say, what else can I say after marrying such an idiot wife?She couldn't tell at all that I called her Mrs. because I was mocking her and venting my dissatisfaction with her.Well, daughter-in-law, Hitomi, please go to the kang.With the help of her two cousins, I took off her shoes and those two wet nylon socks, and lifted her onto the kang.As soon as she got on the kang, she stood up with her head against the paper ceiling.In such a narrow and low place, she looks taller, and those two crane legs have almost no calf.

Her feet are not small, almost comparable to mine.She just walked around on the small Kang with bare feet, which was less than two square meters.Originally, the bridesmaids were supposed to accompany the bride to sit on the bed, but one Wang Renmei filled the kang, and her two cousins ​​had to stand in the corner and sit on the edge of the kang.As if to show off her size, she stood on tiptoe, so that the paper ceiling rested on her head. This seemed like a fun game, she tiptoed around on the kang, jumping, her head hit the paper ceiling with a "bang bang" sound.Holding the door frame, the mother poked her head in and said, "Daughter-in-law, you collapsed the kang, where are you going to sleep tonight?"She giggled and said, "The kang collapsed, so I slept on the ground."

In the evening, my aunt came over for dinner.As soon as you enter the gate, you shout: Grandma is here!Why is there no one to greet you? We hurried out to meet him.My mother said: "It's raining so much, I thought you wouldn't come." She was holding an oil-paper umbrella, her trouser legs were rolled up, her feet were bare, and her shoes were tucked under her armpits. Don't say it's raining, I'll come even if there's a knife!My aunt said, my nephew is a hero, and if a hero gets married, can I not come? I said, aunt, what kind of hero am I?I'm a firefighter, a cook, and I haven't even seen a single enemy.

The fire-headed army is also very important. People are iron, and food is steel. If soldiers don't have enough to eat, how can they charge forward?My aunt said, get some food for me to eat, and I have to go back after I have eaten. The river is full of water, and the bridge will be submerged later, so I can't go back. If I can't go back, I will rest at home for two days. My mother said, I haven't heard you croaking for a long time, and I will listen to you tonight. My aunt said, that's not okay, the county CPPCC meeting will be held tomorrow. Run, you know what?My mother said, your aunt has been promoted, and she has become a member of the Standing Committee of the Chinese People's Political Consultative Conference.

What kind of official is this?My aunt said, put the stinky berries on the plate—to make up the number of samples. When my aunt entered the Westinghouse, all the relatives were in a hurry.The person sitting on the kang bowed his waist and squeezed under the kang, trying to make room for his aunt. My aunt said: Sit where you are and don't move, I will leave after I have a bite of food. My mother told my elder sister to serve my aunt quickly.Aunt lifted the lid of the pot and took out a pastry.The pastry was hot, turned upside down, and made a "sizzling" sound from his mouth.Break apart the pastry, put a few chopsticks on it to steam the meat, knead it together, take a big bite, and say, that's it, don't serve plates and bowls, it's delicious to eat like this, I've been in this business for a long time I just sat and ate a few meals without seriousness.

While eating, he said, let me see your bridal chamber. Wang Renmei thought the kang was too hot, so she sat on the window sill, reading a little book by the light outside the window, laughing while reading it. Auntie is here!I say. Wang Renmei jumped to the bottom of the kang, grabbed her aunt's hand, and said: "Auntie, I need you for something, so you came here." What are you looking for?aunt asked. Wang Renmei lowered her voice and said: I heard that there is a medicine in your place that can give birth to twins? The aunt pulled her face and said: Who did you listen to?

Wang Dan said. Pure rumor! ——My aunt was choked by the pastry, coughed, and her face was flushed, my sister handed over half a bowl of water, my aunt drank it, slapped her chest a few times, and said seriously, don’t say there is no such medicine, even if there is, Who dares to take it out for people to eat? Wang Dan said that someone in Chenjiazhuang took the medicine you prescribed and gave birth to twins!Wang Renmei said. My aunt stuffed half a steamed bun into my sister's hand and said: I'm so mad!Wang Dan, this little goblin, it took me a lot of effort to get the child out of her stomach, but she has no conscience to spread rumors about me.When I saw her, I cut off her x mouth. Auntie, don't be angry, I said, kicked Wang Renmei's calf quietly, and said in a low voice: Shut up! Wang Renmei yelled exaggeratedly: Oh dear mother, you broke my leg! My mother said angrily: "Dog legs that can't be broken!" Mother-in-law, Wang Renmei yelled: You are wrong!The leg of my second uncle's big yellow dog was pinched off by Xiao Shangchun with the "iron cat". After Xiao Shangchun retired and returned to his hometown, he specialized in killing living beings.He got a shotgun and shot all kinds of birds all over the world, even the magpie, which is regarded as an auspicious bird by the villagers.I set up a fine-grained net, and caught fish in circles, not letting go of even small fish fry an inch long.He also got an "iron cat"—a powerful iron clip—and buried it in the woods and in wild cemeteries to catch badgers and weasels.Uncle Wang Renmei's dog stepped on the "iron cat" by mistake and had its leg broken. As soon as my aunt heard Xiao Shangchun's name, her complexion changed, and she gritted her teeth and said: This bad guy should have been hit by thunder and bombs a long time ago, but he has been living a good life. Strong as a bull, it shows that even God is afraid of villains! Auntie, Wang Renmei said, God is afraid of him, but I am not afraid of him. If you have revenge, I will avenge you! My aunt was happy, laughed, laughed, and said: My nephew, I’m telling you the truth. At first, my nephew said he wanted to marry you, but I disagreed, but I heard that you took the initiative to divorce Xiao Shangchun’s son. I agreed.I said yes, this kid has backbone.What's so great about college students?In the future, the children of our old Wan family will not only go to college, but also go to prestigious universities, such as Peking University, Tsinghua University, Cambridge, and Oxford.Not only to study undergraduate, but also to study master, doctor!Be a professor, be a scientist.By the way, I want to be a world champion! Wang Renmei said: "Auntie, then you should give me the medicine for giving birth to twins. I will give birth to another good offspring for our old Wan's family, and Xiao Shangchun will be pissed to death!" God!It is said that you are short-sighted, where is the lack?After going around for a long time, I was circled by you!My aunt said solemnly, you young people, you should listen to the party and go with the party, and don't think of crooked ways.Family planning is a basic state policy and a top priority.The secretary is in command, and the whole party takes action.Typical lead the way and strengthen scientific research.Improve technology and implement measures.Mass movement, persevere.One couple, one child is an ironclad policy that will remain unwavering for fifty years.If the population is not controlled, China will be over. Xiao Pao, you are a member of the Communist Party and a revolutionary soldier, so you must set an example and take the lead. Auntie, you quietly gave me the medicine, and I swallowed it in one gulp, without anyone knowing.Wang Renmei said. You child, it seems that you are really short of mind.Aunt said, let me tell you again, there is no such medicine at all! Even if there is, I can't give it to you!My aunt is a member of the Communist Party, a member of the Standing Committee of the Chinese People's Political Consultative Conference, and the deputy head of the Family Planning Leading Group. How could she take the lead in breaking the law?Let me tell you, although my aunt has suffered some grievances, she has a red heart and will never change color.My aunt is a member of the party in life, and a ghost of the party in death.Wherever the party points, I will rush there!Xiao Pao, your daughter-in-law is short-sighted and can't tell the difference between gray and hot. You must recognize the situation and not be confused.Now someone has nicknamed my aunt "Living Hades", and my aunt feels very honored!For those who planned to give birth, my aunt burned incense and bathed to deliver her; for those who were pregnant beyond the plan - my aunt slammed into the void - never let a single person slip through the net!