Chapter 7 Part II - 2

My brother's cat is not very cute.And there are mostly hybrids, no different from the wild cats on the street. Why is there such a result? How did the thirty cats stay at thirty without adding more? It turned out that some Malay friends loved cats very much, and they often came to ask for a few cats to take home. They got rid of all the good-looking ones, and the only ones left were my brother and his wife who thought they were good. Malays don't like dogs. Cats are the most common pets. They even call a city Kuching after cats.The people of Kuching set up a big lucky cat as the symbol of the city.Why not build Malay cats and set up Japanese cats? It turns out that cat lovers are regardless of nationality. They set up a cat country by themselves. Anyone who likes cats can become a citizen.

Some friends are very afraid of cats and think they are evil. It is better to keep dogs, because dogs are very loyal to their owners.The reason why I don't like dogs is that they look like slaves, sticking out their tongues all day long, shouting and humming, not as noble as cats. The great thing about a cat is that it is the master and you are the slave.It only comes to snuggle you up when it wants to make out with you, and it doesn't pay attention to you, and never puts you in its eyes. Of the thirty cats, my brother recognized them one by one because each had its own personality.Not all of them are high above the ground, some are very timid, and their living range is limited to the room, so they can take a step out of the room.

There is also one that is quite stupid, fat and fat, lying under your feet all day long as a carpet for you to trample on. If my father was alive, I would like this kind of cat the most. If you step on it with your feet, of course it is not really hard, cat The child is comfortable, it feels like you are massaging it, and the position is completely different. Grown-up cats may look very fierce, that is the impression caused by their eyes staring at you, while kittens are always cute and mischievous. When we are old, we sometimes look at people, especially young people, and see what they are thinking from the eyes.But cats can never understand, this is the most mysterious and lovely part of cats.

There are more than 30 cats in my younger brother’s house, each of which can be called by name, which is not surprising, I watch it every day.My family does not have a cat, but I can also see cats, because everyone loves to observe cats all their lives. Whether a cat is cute or not depends on its head. A big head will make people like it; a small head will make people hate it.Also, cats look better at night than during the day, because their pupils are dilated and sharp during the day, like strange eyes, which is frightening. Eyes are the windows to the soul, just like humans.The cat stares at you with wide eyes.It seems to know what you are thinking, but we definitely don't know what the cat is thinking, which is also cute.

Fat cats look better than thin cats.The former is gluttonous and causes obesity; the latter works too hard and cannot eat enough, or suffers from anorexia.Fat cats are lazy. Lazy cats are dull, but they are also blessed; thin cats are more flexible, but cat lovers do not like them because they are active, otherwise they can raise monkeys. A cute cat is also because of its personality.Some are willing to be close to people, and some you raise them for a lifetime and ignore you.Domestic cats are not tamed. Wild cats have a relationship with you. They follow you wherever you go, not because of food.

Cats have various expressions, joy, anger, sorrow, and joy, all of which can be observed.The corners of the mouth turned up when happy, and the triangular eyes stared when angry.A cat that mourns its son, howls up to the sky; a cat that is happy chases its own tail. The cutest time for a cat is when it squints its eyes, which is different from closing them, and the eyes form a line. It is very easy to make a cat squint. If you scratch its chin against its fur, it will squint.Otherwise, just hold it up and turn its back, let it expose its belly, and then gently stroke the hair on its belly. At this time, it is so comfortable that its legs are in the air, it does not move, and it is at your mercy.

Whether it is a bad cat or a good cat, it is always beautiful when it is young, because its eyes are so pitifully big that it is hard to put it down.Maybe this is the way to survive, otherwise, if you have several babies in your life, you will definitely be taken away.If you want to see a cute cat, you must abide by the golden dogma, that is, it is the owner, otherwise no cat can be shown. Going home to pay homage to my father's death anniversary.How many years have you passed away? Our children and grandchildren will never forget it, and we don’t have to remember it. The old man will always remain in our hearts.

I eat dinner at home, I cook, probably a little different from what I eat every day, everyone says it’s okay. After dinner, the family watches TV.My brother and his wife raised more than 30 cats, only one with tiger stripes came and lay in my arms, and the other cats ignored me. "His name is Mini," said the sister-in-law. "It's fat and big, why is it a mini?" I asked. "When we first picked it up, it was dry and shriveled, like malnutrition. We were really afraid that we wouldn't be able to raise him up. In the end, he survived, but he was still very small, so we called him Mini. Unexpectedly, he suddenly gained weight in the past few months, and we wanted to replace him. Just change the name." said the younger brother.

The couple used the third-person pronoun for cats. Recently, my younger brother also wrote prose in newspapers. When he described cats, he never used a word of it. It was him or her. "Mini loves to be hugged," said the sister-in-law, "and he is the most obedient. He can do whatever you want. If you don't believe me, try it." I flipped Mini over and scratched his belly, cooing and not resisting, squinting and enjoying my touch. It's really fun to play with, the end of the mini's tail is curly, I want to know what the hell is going on.Only when I touched it did I find that the bones were slightly deformed.The cat next to it must be angry when it touches the tail, and the mini is as if nothing happened.

Wherever I go, he follows me, I can't do anything, I'm too attached.Throw some shrimp cakes with wine for him to eat, and run back after eating. "You can eat whatever you have for the mini," said the sister-in-law. it is good.I poured the beer in my hand into a teacup and let him try it.Mini is not that stupid. After smelling it and not drinking it, I know where his culprit is. After I packed my bags and returned to Hong Kong, Mini reluctantly let me go. From the beginning to the end, I went to the refrigerator to get a few cans of beer and opened them. If you like cats, you know that all cats have different personalities, and if you look closely, they all look different.

Cats can be lovable, because unlike dogs, dogs will love you.Cats, as long as you love it, is a one-way journey. One is beaten, the other suffers, depending on how you choose, each has its own happiness, and no one can say who is wrong.Always staring at you with big eyes, you don't know the cat's mind.God can't figure it out, can he? If there were a man so clever that he could hear the cat's heart, he would tell you, "I don't know what the cat thinks." Not every cat is cute, some have vicious and vicious expressions.Only the kittens are the most beautiful, each one is beautiful, the eyes are pitifully big, and they are so cute.Animals are always the most beautiful in childhood, and so are people. All cats with big heads are beautiful.Fat cats are also more proud than thin cats. Thin cats are mostly homeless, running around for three meals, and trying to avoid people who hunt them down for humane destruction. If they are too vigilant and have restless eyes, they are hard to please. Among the more than 30 cats raised by my younger brother, many of them were descendants of the original Persian cats. Later, they were incestuous, and the mix was unclear. One of them was probably of similar blood, a bit like a Mongolian child.My nephew Cai Hua just likes this one.I wandered around once, was arrested, and immediately went to the SPCA to look for it.Anxious, after questioning, the person in charge said: "Three hundred cats and dogs are caught here every day, I think you'd better not know their whereabouts." Just about to cry, she meowed and turned her head. The idiot cat was still in the world, ecstatically, and hugged her tightly.Just like people, cats have a good life and a bad life.I love cats, but I don’t know how to raise cats. Both raising cats and raising children are full-time jobs. If you don’t have time, you’d better not try it. Otherwise, if you send it to SPCA, you’ll be a girl who burns charcoal and jumps off a building. Why bother? ? SPCA is the SOCIETY FOR PREVENTION OF CRUELTY TOANIMAL, not the Society for the Protection of Animals. Killing cats and dogs is considered to be cruelty prevention, and they are not merciless. Another year, it's time to go back to pay homage to my father. This time I decided to stay in a hotel because my hometown has been occupied by those cats. My brother and sister-in-law are cat lovers, and they keep dozens of cats at a time. My daughter-in-law loves cats even more, and she often picks up a few cats on the street. Persian cat. Yesterday I called my younger brother to tell him that I would come back to see my mother, and the housekeeping assistant Ah Ying said, "I went to the hospital." "What?" I yelled, "My mother-in-law is sick, why didn't you call me first?" "I took the cat there." Aying said.I was relieved to hear that. My brother came to pick me up at the airport and asked about his cat. He said happily: "The little Persian cat has also changed into an old Persian cat. It is sick and its ears are bitten by insects. The doctor said it needs to be cleaned up. First, give it anesthesia and cure it. The worm, take it back. The anesthesia is over, but it doesn’t move. I thought it was hopeless this time. Fortunately, my wife gave it artificial respiration. I learned from the TV series that I beat its heart a few times, and finally it opened its eyes. , saved.” Mom was taking a nap, and a black-and-white cat was lying in her arms.Strange, she never liked cats, how could she accept this one? "What's the name?" I asked, pointing to it. "Grandpa." My brother said, "When my daughter-in-law brought him back, he jumped onto Dad's altar. Usually cats are afraid of fire, but the altar is lit with incense and candles, so it is not afraid at all." I am also amazed.The younger brother continued: "It just kisses Mom. Mom doesn't mind. We all say it is Dad incarnate, so we call it Grandpa." As soon as Grandpa woke up and saw me, he ran up to me, with his legs on his back, showing his belly, and invited me to scratch him. Very few cats are so friendly, this is the first time they meet people.None of the dozens of cats in the house are willing.In the dark.Maybe it has something to do with my father.I called Grandpa and actually nodded when I saw it. If you live in one place for a long time, you will have so-called connections. Like the veins in a leaf, the people we know are all over the whole society. It is the relationship accumulated over the years. It only takes one phone call to find someone who needs help. Migrating halfway, these human relationships have to be re-established, which is really annoying.This is the most inconvenient thing about going to a strange place. In addition to the people we come into contact with in our work, we must at least know some doctors, lawyers, accountants, etc., and live in a city so that we can feel like ducks in water. But it also depends on the character. I am a person who is extremely unwilling to trouble others. Even if I am acquainted with the other party and get the convenience, I have to repay it in double or triple ways, so that I can feel at ease. In addition to the above-mentioned occupations, I found that I was missing one person, and that was an electrician.I don't know anything about electrical appliances, and I am very unwilling to learn. When there is something wrong with the electrical appliances at home, I don't know how to deal with them. Even the simplest fax machine was a problem for me. I bought an ordinary fax machine and it was always broken. In a fit of anger, I went to Japan to buy a state-of-the-art fax machine, but it still couldn't send it in. A young friend volunteered to do it for me, and if he couldn't receive it from now on, he had to ask him to come in, which turned into a psychological burden for each other. I also bought a mainland product that only watched fake DVDs. My friend promised to install it for me, but the young man was forgetful and kept procrastinating.I was embarrassed to urge, and I still left it at home untouched. There are also some decoders that end up like this. Today I decided to hire someone from the electric appliance store. It doesn't matter how expensive it is, as long as I want it, I can get it.I am getting old and can't bear inconvenience the most. Mother's favorite joke: "I have a son." "Money?" we all called out. "When is a brother? What's his name?" "It's called Qian. My mother said that this Qian son is the most filial and obedient. It will arrive as soon as it is passed on, so there is no need to wait." Yi Shu has never finished a manuscript, and she will submit dozens of articles, of course she will not open the skylight. "She's a professional writer," said the young man. "We're part-timers, and we're forced to leave the manuscript!" Wow, that's amazing, like "I have to. It's a big reason. Why don’t young people have youthful feelings? Young people are competitive, so what if you are a professional? I want to write better than you! Can you deliver manuscripts accurately? I am more accurate than you, that’s right! When we write a manuscript, we hold the mentality of trembling every minute and every second, and we must do our best, otherwise we have to give up.Unpublishing is not only the biggest crime in this industry, but also a matter of principle: what you promise to others must be done.Promise to write for a newspaper, how can you stop for a day because "the author is traveling abroad"? Traveling? Hahahaha, who doesn't travel in this day and age? Don't save manuscripts beforehand, and there is something called a FaX machine for temporary writing! Maybe it's the manuscript fee Is it because the fax fee in the hotel is too expensive? But when you are young, you have to start from scratch, and the salary is also the most basic. I hope to increase every year, how can I underestimate myself. All of us have had the beginning. When we thought about not being able to deliver the manuscript, the nightmare of the deadline was that the teeth were falling off one by one. How dare we do it? The editor at that time was also a villain, of course he would not use a A blank column is used as punishment, but what is even more serious is to ask a cat or a dog to write it and publish it under the original author's name. If you lose the manuscript? I will let the readers crucify you! "Everyone else has at least one Sunday off, so is it okay for the columnist to have one day off a week?" we asked collectively. The editor heard it: "Give you a day off, and you monkeys will take the opportunity to write other manuscripts, no way!" Stubbornness and persistence are outdated. "We have a generation gap." I sighed when talking with young people. "Of course." They said, "Why is there no generation gap?" I said lazily, "I am young, but you are old." The elders asked me to buy things, and I was lying in the hotel feeling unwell, and the task was handed over to the young people who volunteered to go shopping. "I went to several stores, but I couldn't buy it." The young man came back and reported easily. "Is there an address on the box?" was my first reaction, but I was silent. the next day.Sacrificing sleep, I called a car: Seven, I searched and searched, at least find me.After buying it, the sense of satisfaction is exciting and comfortable, and finally did not disappoint the elders. People in our life always try our best to give up what we promised to do.I don't blame young people, I think it's their attitude and their freedom, which is different from our generation. This expression of shaking my head is familiar to me, it was observed on my father's face when I was young. People in the previous life always felt that our work was just a little bit worse, that we didn't read well, didn't work hard enough, lacked imagination, were always incomplete, and didn't have any persistence. Seeing that expression, didn't we understand it back then? Nope.You are you, we are us.We think that we can pass our test, and we have achieved it.Your previous life was a bit pedantic. But there are also doubts: When I get old, will I be as stubborn as the people in my old life? "That depends on whether the person who asks me to do things is worthy of my respect?" The young people finally set their own standards. Usually, the more people around you, the less you know how to cherish this kind of fate.Young people are better for those they just met. If you risk your life to be with a gentleman, you can risk your life to be with a gentleman! Gradually, the young man has also become a stubborn old man. He has his own requirements and standards, and he is not pleasing to the eye compared with his younger one: "How can things be so endless? People in our life ,it's not like that." As human beings, we always forget that we were young. The phrase "people of our lives" was born. Ten years ago, at the Golden Harvest Film Studio on Fushan Road, there were a few Japanese women wandering around every day. They were all fans of Jackie Chan. It was their greatest wish in their lives to see him. One of them is very thin and short, with two big eyes, like the only thing that can see her, and has been here for three days. Those of us who work in the studio are so used to watching it, we never talk to the fans.When I passed by in the evening, I heard her asking the police: it was not because she didn't understand Japanese, but because she was dumb. It was raining heavily, she cowered under the eaves, her face was pale, there was no restaurant in the studio, she stood all day, and she was about to faint. "Are you okay?" I asked in Japanese. She listened, and it turned out that she couldn't even hear the sound, so she took out the paper and pen from the monk's bag and wrote it down. "Manly man." She wrote too. This is also the first Japanese sentence I learned. It is pronounced DAIJYOBU, which has nothing to do with a man at all. It means "it doesn't matter". I used sign language to invite her to sit in the office, poured her a cup of hot tea, and then talked on paper: "Jiqi is in the United States, there is no need to wait for him to come back." "Not waiting for Jackie Chan." She shook her head and wrote, "I love Hong Kong movies, when can I see filming?" It was not popular to set up sets in those days, and the shooting took place in open spaces.One is a concentration of staff.The weather has been unstable for the past few days, and I don't know when I will be on location. I wrote to ask her to go back. Seeing her disappointed expression, I could only talk to her a few more times and asked, "Why do you like watching Hong Kong movies so much?" "The vitality I feel from Hong Kong movies is not found in Japanese movies." She wrote, "I want to be an actor most. If I can play a role in Hong Kong movies, I will be satisfied." I really don't know what to do, and I have nothing to say. I wrote: "Being an actor requires dialogue." "I learn." She wrote: "My life is on the line." Life hanging ISSYOKENMEN means desperately, but with physical defects.How to force? I nodded and watched her go. The next year, she came back again. Seeing how weak she looked, I was really worried.At this time, she opened her mouth: "DAI-DAI-DAIJOY-DAIJYOBU." After saying the phrase "big man", she smiled contentedly. In the third year, she can already speak ISSY. KENMEN hangs his life all his life. During the written conversation, I learned about her language learning process.This little girl actually participated in the factory's "Toei Actor Training Class" to learn dialogue, and she also took a course in reading lip movements.Why L[: She didn't say that when she entered the training class, the tuition fee was paid back a lot. In the fourth year, when she came, she was talking nonchalantly again, and I had to listen carefully to understand a few words.There just happened to be an action movie with a small capital, and I asked the martial arts instructor to take her to see the scene.She was so happy, after filming, probably the staff sympathized with her and invited her to a restaurant in Kowloon City for hot pot.In the next few years, she came to Hong Kong continuously.Before the boss faxed when to arrive, I was away from the trip, she left a small gift and left. Last year in my office, she looked at the bookshelf J: the sixty or seventy collections of essays, made up her mind, and said to me: "I want to be a writer." I was no longer surprised by her wish, so I nodded and said, "Okay, waiting for your work." She came here a few days ago, holding a stack of manuscript paper, and said to me: "The publication has been decided." "Congratulations to your factory." I said, "How much royalties will you pay?" She shook her head: "Shanbanshe asked me to pay 500,000 yen for the two halls. I gave it to them in one go." She shouted in her heart that it was not good, but what has been done is tricky; "Can you correct me for me?" she said confusedly, "there are many Chinese terms in the book, and I'm afraid I may write them incorrectly." I nodded in agreement.She went away happily. Looking at her work tonight, there is only one mistake, the word "ka" in "Carmen in Mong Kok" was omitted. The book is full of touching feelings about Hong Kong, the crowds on Nathan Road, the loneliness in the alleys in the New Territories, the delicious food in Lei Yue Mun, Sai Kung, etc.When I came to Hong Kong for the first time, I was lucky enough to be invited by the pilot to sit in the cab and landed at the brightly lit Kai Tak Airport.Of course, the shock of witnessing the filming and the loss of the Golden Harvest Studio were also indispensable. From a twenty-year-old girl, ten years have passed, and this year is twenty. I know more about her from written talks and conversations than in the book. She had a fever when she was two years old. There is no mention of it.She is not from a rich family. Her parents run an underwear factory in the countryside. She lives alone in Tokyo and is financially independent. She works as a computer typist and nurse assistant on night shifts. She is bullied by colleagues and patients. He also only told me that it is common to be slapped by the other party and fly out.I save money on food and expenses, and spend the money on air tickets and accommodation in Hong Kong. The last savings of 150,000 Hong Kong dollars was used to publish a book. I don’t know if I will get it. On the author's resume, she only wrote: "Between 1994 and 1995, she acted in Toei's videotape films, worked as a staff member in the police car training center, and spoke a few lines." Weak her.Be a real man. Another banquet is held at "Yung Kee" in Central tonight. The boss, Mr. Gan Jiancheng, has a deep friendship with me and often listens to some unreasonable demands from me.In order to thank the group members who have participated in my tour group, every time I hold a big food party in Brother Gan's restaurant.The dishes must be special. It was the first time that I studied the dishes in Mr. Jin Yong's novels with Brother Gan, but I had only heard of them but never eaten them.Can it be done? "Try it, try it." Brother Gan's catchphrase. The result is satisfactory.The only shortcoming is "Twenty-Four Bridges on a Moonlit Night".It is said in the book that Huang Rong embeds the tofu in the ham for Mr. Hong to eat, which is unbelievable.After discussions over and over again, we decided to saw off the whole Jinhua ham into one-third as a cover, dug twenty-four holes in the remaining two-thirds of the meat with an electric drill, and scooped out round pieces with an ice cream maker. The tofu is stuffed into the hole and steamed over high heat. Of course, the tofu made is delicious.The guests only ate tofu and discarded the ham. Later, this dish was also moved to Taiwan to add to the fun of Mr. Jin Yong's symposium. Local celebrities also came to try it and praised "Yung Kee"'s cooking skills. Afterwards, I came up with a bad idea and said to Boss Gan: "The gifted scholar Yuan Mei wrote only what I heard, do you want to have a seat?" "Try it, try it," he said again. What impressed the guests the most that night was "smoked stewed meat". The recipe reads: "Simmer the meat with wine and serve it with juice. Slightly smoke it with wood chips, but not for too long. Brother Gan followed the ancient method and made it three times. I came here to try it three times before I called my friends. "Smoked and stewed meat" is served in ten small cubes, one table for ten people, one piece for each person, I knew there must be someone named "Ange", and I have already ordered another one, everyone swallowed it again, the third time to eat , is gone. The last one was held temporarily, and there was no time to try it out.What should I do? I will give Brother Gan three days to think about it. In less than thirty minutes, he had written a menu and faxed it over.At first glance: the name of the dish is very abstract.Such as "Winds and Clouds will reach the Millennium", "Red Goose Adds Fragrance", "Shredded Radish and Shark's Fin", "Huizhou Fish Biting Sheep", "Shunde Three Treasures", "Jade Surrounding Green", "Silver Silk and Fine Rong.," Bergamot Peach ", "Lingchi Fairy Fruit" and "Shanglin Jiaguo". "I'm sure." Brother Gan told me on the phone. This time, he didn't even try it. "Yung Kee" has been honored as one of the top ten restaurants in the world by foreign famous magazines, and it is not for nothing.Its name is named after the name of the mountain. It started from a street stall in the south and became a whole building, all thanks to a goose that was cooked well.But there is no roast goose in the dishes tonight. The so-called "red goose adds fragrance" is to use the technique of "smoking and stewing meat", marinating the whole goose and then smoking it.There was a burst of fragrance before it was served, and everyone swallowed it all at once.When I was looking around, I found that the young people's table only ate meat, and I asked them for the remaining goose necks and heads, and took it to my seat to enjoy it slowly. First remove the head and chin of the goose, and eat the fat goose tongue. The taste and texture are definitely not inferior to the "Lao Tianlu" duck tongue.Gently split the head of the goose with both hands, exposing the goose brain as big as a cherry, and sucked it. In the past, the emperor made goose brain into tofu, thinking it was just a legend. "Yung Kee" has this kind of ability. It sells hundreds of roast geese a day and takes their brains to make them.Let us group of foodies enjoy.It's a pity that there are too many people to taste this delicacy tonight.The strips of gooseneck are the most tender of fibrous tissue.The French also eat it. They take out the neck bones, stuff them with goose belly sauce, and then fry them. They are extremely clever.I don't think young people in France today would eat it either. Which are the "Three Treasures of Shunde"? Have a look on the table.Just plain scrambled eggs.But where does an unusual fragrance come from? It comes from Li Yunzi. Li Yun then took the crab paste from each crab as big as a copper plate.People in Jiangsu and Zhejiang call this crab a crab, and it is salty and salty to serve as porridge.The crab is already small, and the paste is even smaller.Collecting so many scrambled eggs is extravagant.Another treasure is "pheasant roll." It is made of fat pork soaked in sugar for three days, rolled and fried. It is fat and juicy when eaten. "Money chicken" has nothing to do with chicken. It is made by taking its liver, sandwiching a piece of lard, and adding a piece of barbecue. "Fish bites sheep" is made by stuffing lamb belly into the belly of a mermaid.Fish and sheep make a fresh word, of course fresh and sweet.The whole mandarin fish is used, and I think carp is better.Brother Gan said that was the original intention, but the live carp could not be bought in the first three days.Because it takes such a long time to use clean water to lose the muddy smell. Shredded radish shark's fin is taken from the last time I ate it. One and a half catties of meat are simmered in a catty of soup. Cut radish into thin shreds and simmer in the fins.I suggested to Brother Gan to make it next time, only using shredded radish and not fins. We eat a lot of fins and they are not precious.It is all shredded radish as wings, which is even more powerful. "Try it, try it." Brother Gan said again. The last salty point is "Silver Silk Sauce".The so-called Xirong is Cantonese’s silver-thread egg noodles with wontons. In the old days, the bowls used in street stalls were small, and the noodles were also a small handful. The bottom of the bowl was also placed with a spoon to make the noodles slightly float on the soup. , is considered qualified.Wontons are wrapped with pork that has been chopped into small pieces, four fat and six thin, with some fresh shrimp added, wrapped into a goldfish shape, with a long tail.Wontons should be wrapped immediately. If they are boiled first and then soaked in soup, the fish tails will be rotten. The wontons served tonight are complete and the noodles are crispy.I pointed out that it might be perfect to make bowls of bowls on the side of the street. There are 130 bowls in total for our thirteen tables.Brother Gan gave me a hug. "Why is there no fermented bean curd?" asked the guest. "Give him a break!" I pointed at Mr. Gan. The fermented bean curd of "Yung Kee" is specially prepared by a master chef for brother Gan's father. It is fragrant and smooth.Most importantly: the fork is not salty. Because the elderly should not eat too much salt.At the last gathering, I suddenly remembered that I wanted to eat fermented bean curd from their home. Brother Gan reluctantly brought all the fermented bean curd from the factory. We are all a group of people who love Hong Kong like crazy. I left my hometown and came here, but I refused to leave.Once lived, lived for decades: Who is not a stranger? We are all from the Pearl River Delta, or the so-called gangsters outside of Guangdong Province, South Korea, Indonesia, Europe and the United States, and even Australians from the bottom of the earth also come to the factory.There are not many people who have been born and raised in Hong Kong for more than three generations. Hong Kong is so lovely, mainly because we all have a common spirit, that is, we work hard to improve our lives, pray for better every day, fail, and start from scratch. But the living environment is so poor that living in a garden cottage is simply an unattainable dream. We all live in pigeon-cage apartments.The bigger the area, the more complacent it is, ah, isn’t the pigeon cage a pigeon cage? Everything is more expensive than other countries.The worst thing, of course, is your pigeon cage. Why do we still live here? May I ask where in the world the pace is faster than Hong Kong? Every time the traffic lights in Tokyo are changed, we have turned around several times. We are in a hurry than New Yorkers.Speaking of speed, we are the best in the world. It seems that we have the investigation of personal life, and our speed is also the first. After living in Hong Kong for a long time, the lifeblood of all kinds of people is connected. We know how to find a doctor when we are sick, and how to find a lawyer when we want to get divorced. They are all one of the five things that we can do in a day. Who can help us quickly? ? The money we earned with all our efforts was spent in an instant. Our expenses include hiring Filipino domestic helpers. Is there any place that can accommodate 120,000 to 30,000 people? However, we know that Hong Kong has a lot of bad things (only the Hong Kong Admission Society laughs at itself, try to speak ill of Canadian immigrants, they will kill you), but we still stayed. Therefore, many people make such a metaphor, saying that Hong Kong is like opium, and it becomes addictive after one puff.A better analogy: Hong Kong is a bad woman. She knows that she will hurt her body, but she still tries her best to date her. On the one hand, we soaked like a fish in water, and we were perfect; on the other hand, we inhaled the dirty air into our lungs every day.But we still take good care of it. As a result, those Hong Kong people who immigrated to Canada are envious and jealous. "Hmph, you guys are still playing with that bad woman who is about to fall out of maturity, we can only face a wife who has no interest." The more they think about it, the more angry they will be, and they will have to put you to death. When you arrive in Canada, the first thing you need to do is to buy a big house. If you sell the dilapidated one in Hong Kong, you can also buy two big ones here, one for your own living and one for rent, although the tenant is a very troublesome guy , and the rent is pitifully cheap. At first, weeding and sweeping felt very comfortable, but later I found it troublesome, so I cut down the big trees and covered the grass with compound soil. "This kind of home must have come from Hong Kong immigrants!" said a passing local.I have been to that beautiful land, I said to myself.If I emigrate here, I will live like the locals, I will integrate into their society, if they allow me, I will go to their most exclusive restaurants, I will visit their homes.They can't accept me, and I have to work hard to make them accept it. " However, those who have left the embrace of Hong Kong all hope to organize Canada into a small Hong Kong and feel nostalgic. The women collected the rent, read outdated Hong Kong gossip magazines in the beauty salon all day long, and wentssip about others while eating dim sum imitating Hong Kong together.I haven't set foot in Canada yet, there are already rumors that my wife and I are going to divorce. It's really a fucking big head. Of course, when you want to speak ill of a local person, first say that this is what ordinary women do. There are still exceptions, and the person reading this article is the exception. I have committed a big taboo, I speak ill of Canadian immigrants, I hurt their weak hearts, and will provoke a lot of criticism, I also admit it.I think if you live to this age, if you don’t speak your mind, what’s the point of writing? Maybe I'm young? Still so angry! I really feel young when I go to Vancouver's old Chinatown for tea and look around and I'm one of the youngest. Walking out of the teahouse, I saw a scene that I will never forget. I saw a wrinkled man sticking his head out of an old building and looking at the street. His eyes were dull, as if he had been looking there for decades. Before you become this old man, go back to the arms of this bad woman! She is so interesting, and she has a lot of tricks every day. She says that no one will buy the house, and then queues up to buy a mansion in Happy Valley.Everyone knows that the underworld bosses live a good life here, and the scandals of famous families are endless, and urban clowns appear constantly, like those animals who have undergone plastic surgery and turned into monsters. If you are still sincere to that woman who has no interest, then educate her to be a partner who can talk to you fluently, and don't itching to get this bad woman back. Don't praise your wife too much, saying that she is good at everything, even farting is delicious.This is an extremely unbalanced state of mind, and no one would believe it. If it was really that good, there would be no need to come back to whore this bad woman all the time. The smell of wanton noodles seems to be her body odor, which is not unpleasant.Spirit dagger.You are whoring every day. My first experience with massage was when I was traveling from Singapore to Kuala Lumpur when I was only thirteen years old. A girl who was not four or five years older than me, with a straight face, asked, "Do you want to be dry or wet?" "?" "Use Johnson's baby powder for the dry ones and 471 for the wet ones," she said. This original and authentic Cologne water from Cologne has a very fragrant taste, which I like very much.Wet of course. She took out a 100ml glass bottle from her handbag, applied it with both hands, and began to massage it from my forehead.I have never experienced touching and stimulating the nerve endings of the whole body, and it is very comfortable.Later, the neck, shoulders, and hands and feet became sore and numb, and the blood in the whole body was pumped several times. From then on, I became addicted to massaging. When I came to Hong Kong at the age of sixteen, my friend took me to the "hot spring bathhouse" in Bao Lai Lane, Tsim Sha Tsui, and only then did I know what massage is like in Shanghai's bathhouses.The master of the all-male class, after wiping my back for me, lay on the narrow bed, and started beating like that. The rhythm and sound seemed to be beating gongs and drums, thump, thump, thump.Pressing and pinching, the whole body is relaxed after doing it, it is really deeply addictive. When I went to Japan, I tried their massage in a hot spring hotel, which is called shiatsu. There are not many tapping movements, and the pressure is mainly on acupoints.The neck was unbearable at first and often ached for hours afterwards.The technicians I met later were also mediocre.The quality of people's livelihood has improved, and few people are willing to do this job. There are no successors, so when I go to the hot springs, I rarely come here for shiatsu. I discriminate against their craftsmanship. After I started my homeless life, I looked for massage everywhere. Koreans don’t pay much attention to this kind of technique. I press a few times in the Turkish bath, and I use the Japanese Shiatsu method, but the head massage when I wash my hair in the barber shop , but it is top-notch, slowly pressing from the eyes, pinching the eyelids with the little finger, rubbing and rubbing, then inserting it into the ear, spinning and spinning, authentic enjoyment, where can I find it? I also lived in Taiwan for a while, and most of the people who came here were Zatoichi-style blind men. Their skills were between Shanghai massage and Japanese shiatsu. Indian massage mostly uses oil, which smells bad, but the technician uses yoga methods to press a point for 20 minutes, which can also make people drowsy. The most famous one is probably the Turkish massage. There are a few holes in the top of the bathroom to let the steam out, the sun shines on people, and it shines into a few Jesus lights. The fat and naked man comes, rubbing left and right, just rubbing but not pressing, Rubbing you like a ball of mud is also unforgettable for a lifetime. Another well-known one is the Finnish bath. Walking out of a sauna in the suburbs and jumping into a hole in a frozen lake, it would definitely kill you if you had a heart attack, but you were young at that time and could bear it.喷出，与外边的冷冻相撞，结了一团雾，整个人像被云朵包住，这时自己用一把桂叶敲打全身，后来一个赤着身体的高大女人前来替你按摩，经验是可贵的，但毫无纤细可言。 还有很多国家的按摩，也都试过。一生之中，遇到最好，没有几个。在蛇口的"南海酒店"中的孔师傅，是穴道学会的主席，方位奇准，按完还教你几招自习，可以推荐你去。 到云南大理旅行时，在一家台湾人开的旅馆中遇到一位三十岁左右的失聪女士，也是奇才，不知道承袭了哪一派的功夫。按完整个人脱胎换骨，可惜没记下她的名字。 汕头"金海湾酒店"中，脚部按摩技师有个很特别的姓，不会忘记，姓帅。是一位天生的技师，至今我被做过的脚部按摩，算她最好。 谈回指压，数十年前邵逸夫先生从东京东银座的艺妓区请了一位长驻香港，帮他按摩。当年事忙，也很少叫她。这位小姐来了差不多两年，一遇到有什么困难都来找我解决，因为我们会用共同语言，她一直说要给我按，我没答应。原则是别人请来的，我不可私下占便宜，最后她临上机那晚上，哭泣要求不让她做一次，她绝对不安心回家，只好顺丫她的意思，指头按下，由轻至重，连带着震荡，绝对不会令肌肉酸痛。内功发出，一股暖气流人双腿内侧，使到整个人欲死欲仙。从此，再也不敢看轻日本指压了。 另一位功夫绝顶的女人是在印尼遇到的，当年我颈部生了一粒粉熘，准备去法国医院开刀取出，吩咐她不要碰到那个部位，她从我的手脚按起，技巧和中国、日本、欧洲、印度和中东的都不一样，招术变化无穷无尽，没有一道是重复的，令人折服。 "听说有一个穴道，一按就会睡觉。是不是真的?"我用印尼话问她，她微笑点头，双指从我的眉心按去。 一醒来，她人已不在了，我去浴室冲凉时，发觉那粒粉瘤也让她给按走，消失得无影无踪，但一点也不痛，省掉好多住院和手术的费用。如果你问我最喜欢是哪一种按摩?我一定回答是泰式的。若不是去色情场所，所有的泰式古法按摩，都有水准。按摩等于是别人为你做运动，泰式的最能证明，按摩师抱着你，两入合一，用她身体全副劲力为你做，是天下最好的按摩。 要找最好的技师有一个秘诀，那就是先付丰富的小费。对于小费，倪匡兄有一点见解，他说："小费当然是先给，后给不如不给，笨蛋才后给。" "旭甜酉罩知扔扨同姓羽套而婪"，干请求。 "不行。"妈妈拒绝，"你们年轻人，不可以穿得那么老成。" "儿子要，你就买给他吧!"在一边的老爸看得不忍心，代儿子请求。"什么时候轮到你发表意见了?"老母大喝一一 做爸爸的即刻变成缩头乌龟。 看这个妈妈。嘴唇极薄，双眼露出凶光，腰线发胀，一身名牌，污辱了设计家。 何时开始，变成这个样子?我认识她是她刚从学校出来做事，小鸟依人，嘴唇厚得性感，永远甜甜地微笑。穿着普通牛仔裤，身段引诱着周围男士，露出的小蛮腰，令人恨不得一把抓住。 拍拖日子里，她对这个男人千依百顺，偶尔他忘记了她的生日，在办公室里投进我怀里，哭得伤心，只有代那男人清她烛光晚餐。 丰子恺先生说得对，人的变化，是一秒秒地逐漸进行，身边的人每天看，不觉察。久不见之，则吓得一大跳。 甚么情形之下造成这种不可爱的性格呢?我想一切是由女人的天性开始。 原始的母性社会中，女人已经不断地主使男人的命运。再进化，也改变不了，就像蝎子一定要叮死人一样，不管男人对她们多好。 精力是一点一滴凝成的。女人的忍耐力特强，她们不停斗争，不放过一分一秒，所受的委屈，变成最大的武器。男人一同情，她们就打蛇随棍上算计得到赔偿，做的分外要求。男人也答应了。 唠唠叨叨的死缠烂打也是她们的刀剑，在男人精疲力尽时，她们养足精神，向你疲劳轰炸，到最后，男人总得投降。不是怕，是烦。 儿女是囊中物，成为女人的管治区，不听话就不得好受。渐渐地，儿女只有等到思春期，才爆发出一场不可收拾的叛逆。在这之前，只是小奴隶。 好了，女人已经统治丫她们的小小王国，非向外扩充不可，儿女的同学，看不顺眼的即刻下令绝交。丈夫的亲朋戚友，对她们略有不敬，就是死敌，一个个消灭。 消灭方法只有一个，就是不停地说对方的坏话，这个人的衣服多无品位，这个人对他的太太不好，我怎么知道?是她太太亲口对我说的呀，这个人一一 今天听一回，明天听两次，久而久之。唉，这个老友，也的确不长进，对我也没有对他好。我太太说得一点都不错：你请客时，有没有看过他争着付钱?男人是单纯的，很容易中毒。 孤立是最好的办法。丈夫和儿女没有了外间接触，当然要靠剩下的我。女人那么计划。 打起战来，女人的兵法比孙子还要厉害，到最后，她们以为已经统治了天下。 如果这个时候你遇到她们，只有以笑脸对之，但你一转身，她们在床上问丈夫，这个人有什么目的。 千万别得罪这个时候的上司太太，她们的想象力足以毁灭你的前途，最后防守线只有一条，那就是尽量避开。 但是避开也要避得很有技巧，不然一被觉察，便引起她们来分析你是敌是友的兴趣，友情，在她们的字典中已不存在。 她们会叫丈夫再请你到家里吃饭，或者组织外游让你参加，也许会吩咐一点有关她们的事给你去做。你的一举一动被放在显微镜中，行差踏错，即判死刑。遇到这种情形，避也避不了，只有怨八字和她们相冲，快点转工换职吧。 这一类的女人有一个敌人，她们的女儿见惯母亲的行为，必受影响，到最后由她们来欺负老娘。不过最致命的还是她们自己，她们寂寞。 在我的一生，碰到这类女人颇多，战役重复又重复，又悟出了一套对付她们的兵法来。 以其人之道，治其人之身，是完美的报复。别以为男人不会造谣，说起女人的坏话，能力不差，?舀滔不绝的诽谤，发表在文字上，又能生财，何乐不为? "难道每一个女人都一样的吗?"女友问，"那我应该警惕警惕，老了之后才不像巫婆。" "当然有例外的。"我说，"你就是例外。" 骂女人的文章，有一条黄金规律，那就是一定要说有例外。女人听了，都以为自己是例外，不然会群起来围剿你，可不是闹着玩的。 好女人，好太太，好母亲，还是有的。这是上帝赐给的，让她们少了一条筋，这些女人永远往好的方面去想，也很容易满足，一直嘻嘻哈哈，她们已经不是女人，变成男人，没有了尾巴中的毒素。 丑人多作怪，死八婆个性的女人还是不少，她们非常可怕。但是最最可怕的，并不是女人，而是像女人的男人，说起话来只见下边牙齿的居多。骂女人的另一条黄金规律，就是先骂男人。 我在十八岁那年考到驾驶执照，第二天就把车子给撞扁了。 那是我姐姐买的一辆一九五五年的奧士汀二手车，篮绿颜色，现在想起来这车设计极有毛病，它的车身很高，四轮狭窄吃不到地面，非常容易翻侧，但这都是藉口，问题出在我只上了十几小时驾驶课，根本没有经验。 约了好友黄树琛，我们两人都是摄影发烧友，一起到英军战亡纪念碑去拍照，初学者对几何形的构图特別感兴趣，那排排整齐的坟墓，阳光照下，是最好的对象。 这条大路直通马来亚柔佛、为什么不顺道去一趟?那处榴莲便宜，买几个回来吃吃也好。女同学听说有私家车坐，都争着参加，挑了三个样子好一点的，就上路。 马来人的榴莲，不要本钱。他们一早到林子里拾了拾，放在两个大竹箩里，弄根扁担就挑出城摆在路旁卖，生意好即收档，晚上到游乐场跳"弄影。"这是马来社交舞，男女双方把腰摇呀摇，手摆摆姿式，互不接触，随着单调的节奏起舞。一块钱买四张票，交给舞女，跳将起来，不亦乐乎，要是没有人买榴莲?自己吃呀。 "全部要了怎么算?"我问小販。 "四毛钱一斤。"他说。在新加坡，榴莲以斤计算。 堆满车子的后厢。这时另一个小贩出现："两毛一个。" 那三个女的说买去送亲戚也好，再向他要了，装不下，就放在后座，我和树琛坐前面，开车回家。 一路上女的唱黄梅调，又有的唱《刘三姐》、《五朵金花》。树琛和我则唱《学生王子》里的《喝!喝!喝》、哎海德堡的夏天》等等，扮男高音，唱得走调。 肚子太饱，柔佛那顿午饭吃的尽是螃蟹，那里的又便宜又多花样，清蒸、盐燭、炒咖喱、炒酸甜酱，每一碟都是肥肉蟹和膏蟹，饭气攻心，昏昏欲睡。 直路上，为显威风。愈开愈快。 忽然，前面有块急转弯的牌子，看见时已经迟了，现在的话也许会进高波档松缓速度，当年只反应性踩煞车，囁一啤胎和道路磨擦的声音兼有树胶烧焦的臭味，整辆车子凌空飞起。 眼中路斜了，又见天空在脚下，转了又转，转了又转。女孩子们的尖叫，跟着看到榴莲腾突飞着。糟了，坚硬的刺插进她们头上怎么办?非娶她们不可。穿红袍的新娘子头布掀起，是个大花脸! "砰砰"一声，挡风玻璃变成数千块的碎片，当年还没发明合胶的，其中一块直飞黄树琛的眼睛，他依本能把头一歪，四块玻璃擦靠眼角而过。停住吧!停住吧!一刹那的事，又有如一世那么长!终于，一切忽然静止。 车子两边都凹了进去，门打不开。只有从破裂的挡风玻璃处爬了出来。 "有没有事?有没有事?"大声问女孩子，我们一个个把她们拉出来，已经吓得不会哭泣。 奇迹性的，大家都没受伤。树琛觉得湿湿地，用手一摸，看见眼角处淌出血来，女孩子争着用手帕为他止血，他用手把她们推开。 天气热，血很快凝固，附近没公众电话，不知怎么求救，只有坐在路旁，等车子经过。 无聊起来，这种机会不可多得，非拍几张照片不可，树琛拿了莱卡，我用的是父亲的Rollifoex双镜头盒子相机，把撞坏的车子记录下来。 "不够戏剧性!"树琛说。 我即刻钻进车子，上半身爬出来伏在挡风玻璃处，假装受了重伤，让他多拍几张。 过了好久，也不知道是谁报的警，救伤车终于来，把我们一个个送进车厢。临上车，舍不得榴莲，选了那几个最熟最大的搬了上去。肚子忽然感到很饿，借了铁钳把榴莲抓开，和救伤人员分享，一起吃掉。