Chapter 69 Change your pants, change your city

Change your pants, change your city Feng Tang I originally thought that changing jobs and cities was as easy as changing pants. At that time, I went to the United States alone from Beijing. I didn’t understand it at four or six. I simply checked in two huge boxes, dozens of pirated CDs in my schoolbag, and a few thin green one-hundred-dollar bills in my wallet. I hugged my girlfriend, whose face was like a spring flower, and whose body was like sorghum, waved to my mother and father, and after a gentle sleep on the plane, I arrived at the place of American imperialism: most people spoke English, The flowers and plants are neat, the ground is free of phlegm and cigarette butts, and the coffee and cola exude the smell of capitalism.

So imagining the transfer from Beijing, China to Hong Kong, China, I think it should be as simple as changing pants: shed the old ones, throw them into the washing machine, take the new ones out of the closet, kick your legs twice and put them on your body. However, leaving Beijing is the first barrel of trouble. Although I am actually employed by a foreign company, my unit is a foreign company service company in name and formalities.Foreign companies resign, sign various confidentiality agreements and non-competition agreements, and return confidential documents, keys, secretaries, door cards, company credit cards, mobile phones, and computers, and then go to foreign company service companies.In a foreign company service company, I need to settle my various welfare insurance and housing funds. The calculation of the specific amount is more complicated than the advanced operation of hedge funds. Basically, it gives me a card, and I can take as much as I want. The password is not yet valid. Let me tell you, I was also given a passbook, which is not from the same bank as this card. The people on the first floor couldn't explain to me what the relationship between this card and this passbook is.Also, my files have to be stored in Beijing talent (company? I don't know), and I have to pay a few hundred yuan, don't ask why.I can also save it elsewhere, but there is no on-site office in foreign companies. As for where to go, where, and what price, the on-site office personnel sent by Beijing Talents do not know.Also, I have to keep my account on the street, and I have to keep my medical card and payment records by myself.

Then there is dealing with things outside the body.First is the house, which needs to be rented out first. Relying on my minimalist decoration style, I rented it out to a semi-old man who is doing cultural and art projects in the British embassy.The project is done for four years, and the house is rented for four years.The decoration is the work of Kong Da, a master of interior design in the capital. Kong Da is characterized by great talent, dexterity, quick wit, love of women, living in a bathhouse, and his mobile phone is not in the service area.Originally, the house was in Nordic style, with a real marble fireplace, such as "Blue Diamond" and "Black Sands", and a dog slept lazily in front of the fireplace.Later, Kong Da said that there was not enough time, "Let's change the modern Japanese style. In fact, Japan best inherited the style of the Han and Tang Dynasties, and the Japanese are salty and damp." Later Kong Da said that there was not enough time, "Change to minimalism, The most economical is the best, less is more, and less is better.” As the saying goes in cross talk, if you draw a fan, the beauty will be replaced by Zhang Fei, and Zhang Fei will become a big tree. In the end, you can only paint the fan in black and write two words. A gold letter is over.Later, after the house was rented to the British, Kong Da said, "Europeans have the best artistic vision." I was about to move out, and I packed forty boxes of books alone.It is impossible to move to Hong Kong. There are not so many books in an island in Hong Kong. These books entered my house in Hong Kong, and I had to sit on my toes in the toilet to sleep.There is really no one to bully, and there are parents.The books were piled into my mother's original bedroom, and the boxes were piled up three layers.My mother shouted in the United States that the floor was about to collapse.I said, I asked Kong Da, the design strength of civil floor slabs is 150 kg per square meter, and the actual load capacity can reach 300 kg, and the average in my book is more than 130 kg per square meter.My mother continued to yell in the United States that the floor was about to collapse, and Lao Cai who lived downstairs was a good man.I said, don’t worry, after I piled up the books, I jumped on the floor a few times, and it didn’t collapse. I went to Uncle Cai’s house once, and I didn’t see any cracks on the ceiling.Then I called from the United States, it was my sister, and said that my mother had dreamed of moving some book boxes from one room to another room, she was exhausted and had a heart attack.In addition to the house, there is also a broadband network. I told the old man at the British embassy to keep it. There is no "Attic" for sale in Beijing, and your wife is not there. He said, yes, yes.There is also a mobile phone, and I have applied for a voicemail box, which is recorded in both Chinese and English, to the effect that I have gone to the south, and I will leave it if I have something to say.After listening to the recording several times, I reluctantly accepted that the male voice with a duck voice on the phone was my own.

Then deal with the fetters outside the body.I can't take the West Causeway of the Summer Palace and the Tongzi River behind the Forbidden City with me, but I have to use all my strength to take a vicious look, smell it, and slowly touch the places I can touch: one is a mulberry tree, the other is a mulberry tree. It is also a mulberry tree.I can’t take it away from the antique city, but Xiao Cui, a bad-ass jade merchant who is a hero, comforted me. There is a Hollywood road in Hong Kong, and there are also bad-ass jade merchants on the road. Xia, "Also, and, remember, don't buy handed down ones, only the old ones that are open." Xiao Cui said.Meat and wine friends can’t be taken away. I played three rounds a day in a week, and basically saw them all, at least for three or four months. Don’t think about them.The one-eyed dragon Lao Bai from the Kangning massage parlor couldn’t be taken away. I did it for three hours straight, and my body began to recover and become like sorghum. It’s not far away from Hong Kong, and I heard that the cheapest massage in Hong Kong costs 138 Hong Kong dollars per hour.” Said Cyclops Laobai.The Sanlian Bookstore couldn't take it away, so I bought more than a dozen books, and the luggage couldn't fit, so they continued to pile up on the three-story bookcases. Anyway, Lao Cai under the floor was always in danger. Anyway, my mother decided that the floor was going to collapse, so it was decided. Air ticket, said that after the doctor gave permission, he would fly back, adjust the bookcase, and save Lao Cai.

Then there is the second bucket of troubles in Hong Kong: travel procedures, work procedures, housing, mobile phone numbers and notifications to all comrades, bank accounts, broadband registration, bookstores, skilled blind massage parlors, various bank cards and flight mileage cards. Ways to update. Needed for work, sometimes going to Shekou, and then there is a third bucket of trouble: travel procedures, work procedures, housing, mobile phone numbers and notification to all comrades, bank accounts, broadband registration, bookstores, skilled blind massage parlors, various banks The contact information of the flight mileage card has been updated.Don't expect Shekou to be much less troublesome than Hong Kong.The same name as China Mobile and China Construction Bank, the Beijing branch and the Guangdong branch are almost two companies.I don't hold out any hope.

Therefore, if you don't consider missing, entanglement, repetition, and the group of relatives and friends on both sides, it is simply more troublesome than changing a wife.In fact, my wife and I have our own ID cards, passports, mobile phones, separate accounts and houses, and massage parlors for blind people with good skills can share them.Kong Da, who came over, said, in fact, the new divorce law is implemented now, and the procedures are simple, and it will be more convenient in the future: there is a machine like an automatic teller machine, two people swipe their marriage certificates, and the glass cover of the automatic divorce machine will be opened. It turned on and the screen said, do you want a divorce?The two people press Y at the same time, and then press their fingerprints to confirm. A pair of scissors is stretched out from the automatic divorce machine, and the marriage certificate is cut off.

The socialist market economy, the WTO, and the Olympic Games are coming.Life is good, even if you can't live forever, you still hope to prolong your life.Two ways can prolong life.First, live longer.If you live to be one hundred and sixty years old, compared to ordinary people, you have lived two lifetimes.Second, make more changes.Change your trousers every day, change your computer desktop and MSN display name every week, change your screen name and email address every month, and change your city every two or three years. Compared with ordinary people, you will live several more lives.

I think, despite the trouble, the second is easier than the first.