Chapter 22 Miscellany

Miscellany This time, returning from Beijing to the south, I took the Tongzhou steamer in Tianjin, which was stolen last year.The matter of robbery seems to be very remote; the filth on the frightened ship is really unbearable.It was a British company ship; such filth seemed to tarnish the colors of the Union Jack.But the British said: what's the matter?The boats were originally for the Chinese, and dirt is the freedom of the Chinese, and the British can control it!When the British want to take a boat, they will go and sit in the kitchen to see what it looks like?Over there, Chinese guests below the official cabin are not allowed to go up, so that's fine.Yes, it's no wonder that some friends on the same ship would call the ship an "imperialist" ship. "Ship of imperialism"!What kind of "oppression" have we suffered?Yes, yes!

Let me now talk about the waiter. If there is anyone I always hate, it must be the waiter in Ningbo.One of their sites is a ship, and the other is a hotel.Their unity is a patriarchal society and Liangshanbo style; therefore, it should not be insulted, just like other "Ningbo gangs".Their job is to take care of travelers; but in fact, on the contrary, what travelers get from them is insults, intimidation, and deceit.In the past, people in China lamented that "travel is difficult" because of the inconvenient transportation; but under the convenient transportation now, even people who are experienced in traveling still make such sighs from time to time, why is that?The teahouse and the dock workers are struggling to cope. I think it is more "difficult" than the mere transportation inconvenience!Therefore, the "difficulty of traveling" in the past was materialistic; the present one is idealistic.Of course, this has something to do with the general order and moral concepts of the society, and it cannot be entirely the responsibility of the person concerned; but the "evil character" of the person involved actually plays an important role.

I have traveled a lot by ship and suffered a lot of insults, so let me talk about the waiter on the ship.When you go to book a seat, if there are not many passengers, the waiter may greet you with a cold face; if the passengers are crowded, you will be unlucky.They either turn their faces away and ignore you; or they send you off with a sentence or two that are sharper than a knife—for example, "wait for the next trip."People who travel around are always a little unusual, and there is always a look of anxiety on their faces.They wait for work at leisure and are happy to joke with you, so all reactions are always lazy and cold; the more anxious you are, the happier they will be.They have no hatred for you, they just want to play and have fun, just like the ladies play with lap dogs.So you remember: when boarding the ship to reserve a space, don't call the waiter loudly first.Aren't you eager to talk to them?But they have to scold you first, even if it's just a low-level soliloquy: "What's the matter? Whoa, whoa!" Then they say loudly, "Oh, come on, what's the matter?" You have to remember Write: The slower you speak, the better, and the lower the better; don't be too polite, and don't be too rude.In this way, you are the person on the threshold and an expert; although they may not welcome you, they will not play tricks on you. ——Just talk to you with a cold face; you should be flattered to know that this is considered favored.

Once the cabin is booked, it is better for you to disembark as late as possible; naturally, the departure time cannot be passed.It is best to arrive on board two hours or one hour before sailing, then it will appear that you are a person with "resilience", which is not comparable to the "Amulin" who is in a hurry.Besides, the waiter had to go ashore to attend to his own affairs, and he was stumped when he got there early; although he could entrust his companion to greet him, it would be troublesome anyway.It is not worth it for them, but unnecessary for the guests; therefore, the guests have to be treated like "Amulin".Sometimes the boat sails at ten o'clock tomorrow morning, and you go up at ten o'clock tonight, thinking that the night will be proper; but it doesn't.They are going to play cards at night, and if you go, it will be enough to disturb their happiness;There is a kind of "point", a kind of metaphorical "rule", and a kind of "threshold scripture". You have to do "Amulin" several times before you can deal with it "just right".

After sailing, if you think the waiter is idle, you might as well call a few more times.If you really do this, you should be taught a lesson again.The waiter has to chat and cook private goods during the day; smokes opium and plays cards at night, so I have time to serve you!They scoop up a basin of water for you in the morning, cook your meals during the day, and twist your towels after meals; they also spread out your bedding when you board the boat, and make your bedding when you disembark: well, that’s enough, That's enough.In addition, if there is something special for them to do, it is just an extra service.You have to go out of the hatch by yourself, call the waiter slowly, talk to him slowly, and he will do what you say, without doing you any harm.It is best to inquire about the names of the two waiters in advance, and it will be more effective to call them leisurely at this time.But you should shout generously, as if you are very familiar, and don't be a little slow-witted.Calling by name is more effective, the called person thinks that you intend to get close to him (as a result, the wine fee will not be reduced), while other waiters may think that you are familiar with the called person, so they have a considerable relationship. Respect; so when you bark for the second and third time, others will often bark for you.But you can only call them occasionally; if you are troublesome often, they will find out that you are "Amulin" and pretend to be an expert, and they will immediately change their attitude towards you.As for some people sleeping on the bunk and calling out "tavern" aloud, that seems to be enough air; in the eyes of the waiter, it is undoubtedly the name of "A".So they agreed angrily: "What's the matter? Wow!" But they would come and go.If you yell a few more times, they will say, "What's the matter? The waiter is singing like a mountain!" Unless you are really numb or really angry, you probably don't want to call them anymore.

"When a child enters the Taimiao, everything happens," which has been passed down to this day as a good story.But when you enter the ship, it is best not to ask about everything.The waiters are afraid of trouble and lazy, which are their characteristics; if you ask them, they will either say they don’t know, or they will deliberately joke with you. Fortunately, they are irresponsible to the guests, except for their luggage.Probably the most common questions asked by guests, "Can I arrive tomorrow?" "Can I arrive in the afternoon?"They either answered casually, or said, "Take your time, you will arrive." Or simply said, "It's early!" Most of them missed the point.Their words often change, making you not sure; if you are not sure, you will not reply.What they want is clean ears.

The waiter is always located in the so-called "big dish room" dining room on the ship.They often gossip around the table, and one or two guests may join in.But if the guests are full and they have no place to sit, they will hate it; if at night, they honestly turn off the lights, let you grope in the dark.So the table in the dining room looks like their patented one.When they sat around the table, some of them certainly had something to talk about; some of them didn't even talk, just sat silently, or were playing cards.I seem to be bored by them, but that's how it goes.Their faces are full of weariness, sarcasm, and numbness, as if they have worked hard to practice.The most terrifying thing is this full face: the so-called "Shi Shiran rejects people thousands of miles away" is this kind of face.At night, the electric lights shone, somewhat covering up the dull gray color; they also began to feel a little angry.They set up a shop to smoke opium, or dragged out tables to play cards.They smoked big cigarettes and started laughing; they played cards and went to camp all night -- the sound of cards and arguments filled the small "big kitchen".The guests, especially when they were sick, could not sleep; but what did it matter to them?You deserve to listen carefully!Some of them don't smoke opium or play cards, so they take out cigarette pictures and enjoy them carefully one by one: this is "deeply elegant".

I have said that the unity of the waiters is a patriarchal society and also Liangshanbo style, but there is still an atmosphere of war among them from time to time.The strong fighting atmosphere cannot be seen in the boat; what can be seen in the boat is only slightly distant. "Only the mouth speaks a good Xing Rong", the mouth of the waiter seems to be worth noting.Their mouths, on the one hand, are practiced extremely sharply; on the other hand, they are naturally localized.They are about "would rather lose on their legs than on their mouths".Therefore, even between companions, because of an intentional or unintentional, irrelevant remark, Xiangtun got really angry and raised his eyebrows and raised his eyes in resentment for a long time.At this time, his face lost its usual calm color, and replaced it with a fervent and ferocious expression.But in the end it was just a verbal "hate", and there seemed to be no real punches or kicks.The saying goes, "A gentleman uses his mouth, but a villain uses his hands;" Although the waiters have some disputes, it is still the way of a gentleman.Someone said, "That's what makes a Southerner a Southerner," and I think that's true.Although the waiter is "unwilling to lose with his mouth" to the guests, his attitude is all teasing, and there seem to be very few who are genuine; and the more genuine you are, the more he can play with you.This is probably because the guests are backed by their group; the guests are always more lonely, they "rely on the crowd to deceive", and they are not afraid that you will not submit: so there is no need to be angry.And if he suffers from a guest, many companions must eat with him, and it is not a person who loses face: why bother to get angry?To be honest, it's not enough for the guests to ask them to get angry!As for the quarrels between their companions, that is their immediate interests, and if they do it alone, they have no ready-made strength to rely on;

If the waiter smiles at the guests, it must be a few minutes before collecting the wine.Although the amount of wine money is not fixed, there is an unwritten spectrum.If you weigh and give according to the score, although you will not be able to get a "thank you", the oppression of words will not come.If you give too little and go too far, they will first laugh at you, and then scold you, and you have to pay them more; in fact, since you have been scolded, you don’t need to add more, but in fact most of them are scolded. The guests, deterred by their power, are always added to them.After adding, you have to listen to a lot of nagging.Once, a student on the same boat as me was supposed to give one yuan for drinks, but he only gave Xiaoyang four cents.The waiter tried hard but couldn't get it, so he said: "You can take it back and make the fare!" He put the money on the bunk and left angrily.The student finally added some money and handed it over to him; he took it away silently, his face still stern, as if disdainful. ——After paying for the wine, it is time to make the bedding; at this time, you still have to take your time, and you still have to learn a lesson when you are in a hurry, although you have already paid for the wine.After the bedding is laid, the oppression of the waiters is over, and you are ready to be oppressed by the dock workers and the hotel waiters.

I originally stated that I described the incident on the Tongzhou steamer, but I wrote a "Curse of the Tea Room"; here, I seem to be contradicting myself.No, "The world is as black as crows." If we were careful to apply this sentence only to the Ningbo teahouses in the ships, I don't think it would be paradoxical.Therefore, although I say it generally, the tea room of the Tongzhou steamer is included; whether it is specifically specified or not is irrelevant. In July 1926, White Horse Lake.