Chapter 17 A dream three or four years

I never felt that I was a poor student, but the facts have proved that people's subjective consciousness cannot change the objective existence, and this terrible fact is that I still haven't passed the fourth grade.I know if I don't get through this time next year I'm really screwed, I'm going to be really screwed.The leaves kept falling under the tree and I was very sad just looking at it, thinking about a big man being sad about this shit makes me feel sick. When will this life come to an end?When I stood on the empty lawn of the school watching the sunset, I thought of Uncle Lu Xun's famous words in a trance.I remember that when I was in middle school, I used to memorize his articles, long paragraphs.But there were not many exams, so I stopped memorizing them later.If I knew it, I would have to memorize it even if I didn’t take the exam, wouldn’t I be too stupid?But teachers like stupid students, so my teacher's evaluation of me when I graduated was just two words: surly.This is the word I think he has used most culturedly in the past three years.I remember a girl at my desk rolled her eyes like she was about to die every time she recited Lu Xun, but every time she came back to her senses in a very leisurely way, it made me very nervous beside her for fear that she would faint. Carry her to the infirmary.

My name is Gu Xiaobei, and my friends call me FOX. I live in Shanghai, the most prosperous and eccentric city in China, but I live like a primitive person. I work at sunrise and rest at sunset, and sometimes I don’t even sleep at sunrise. By the way, I comfort the teacher, don't live too leisurely. I read foreign languages ​​when I was studying high mathematics, watched computers when I was studying foreign languages, and slept while using computers.Because my computer teacher is a genius. Although my computer knowledge is extremely poor, he just has a way to make the class even worse.And the worst thing about him is that he rolls his name once in class and has to roll his name again after class.But just like the third subject of English textbooks, it changes nothing.I once saw a boy lower his head and yell seven "come" from below, three of which were screaming for girls.I really wanted to pass out.

My university relied on the support of the government to build the school like a royal garden. When a friend from F University came to me, he was stunned at the door. When I appeared in front of him, he patted me on the shoulder and said, boy, your school It’s really like Yingde College in Meteor Garden, and then he hooked my shoulder and drooled and said, I don’t know if there is F4? I glared at him, and then told him, yes, there are many dormitories, and all four high-level students fail, F4. My school is in the suburbs, so the tall and majestic white buildings in the school stand out from the surrounding low gray buildings.This so-called largest university in Shanghai is indeed ridiculously large. The last four stops of the bus are the four gates of my school.North, south, east and west.I poetically call it Qinglong Baihu Xuanwu Suzaku.It looks like the ancient city of Xi'an.But the disgusting thing is that I am not from the Department of Chinese or History, I am a film and television project engaged in engineering.What I'm trying to figure out is advanced math and optoelectronic physics, audio video, camera editing, animation special effects and post-production.One of the most important reasons for my survival is to stay in this major, and one day I may become the new Wong Kar Wai, because after all, only my current university in Shanghai has my major, and after I entered this major Before the academy, Wong Kar-wai gave a lecture that was said to be very exciting and stream-of-consciousness.I am always confused about the latter adjective.About how a speech can behave like a stream of consciousness used to be a question that puzzled me for a year in my freshman year.

The dean of our college is the lovely old man who has influenced a whole generation in China. We call him Dao Xie affectionately, but we must obediently respect him in front of the teacher. Thank you Dean.In the first week of our school, Director Xie gave a report on studying hard and making progress every day in the most luxurious lecture hall in the most luxurious J building of our school.I listened very attentively and took notes - because my counselor caught me and asked me to take meeting minutes. Needless to say, the threat was that the lure was that I could add credits, so I generously agreed, I am very good at business of.At the end of the report, we watched Director Xie's classic film "The Opium War". I only remember the rumbling of the cannons. I think the audio equipment here is really good.

Around my school, there is only one road out of the north gate worth visiting, so every night it is crowded with couples wandering out of the school. Those boys always look for opportunities to take off their clothes to wrap around the girls they just got. My friend, with a fierce look in his eyes while wrapping it up, he said with ulterior motives, be careful not to freeze.After speaking, he laughed like an idiot, so stupid that he gave me stomach cramps. I was very disdainful, but Ah K was very moved, she always said with a look of intoxication, you look at how considerate other boys are, and then look at you, you will know why you can't find a girlfriend.I always walked forward with a look of disdain, put my hands in my trouser pockets and said without looking back: Girls nowadays just have no brains, and they still count the money and add goods when they are sold.

But I was so disdainful that I even annoyed myself, because it seemed that I really didn't have a girlfriend. I asked Ah K, am I particularly ugly, you don't have to give me face and just say that I can hold on. Ah K said, no, your eyes are not very big but they are sunken, so you look very energetic, your nose is high and straight, and your lips have a special arc when you smile, which looks very evil. I like this smile. Does that mean I'm too rough? Compared to girls, yes, but compared to other boys, you can be regarded as having a cleanliness and it is quite serious. Is it because I am not here?

Go to Longhua Temple to ask for a signature, the more you ask, the more outrageous it becomes.Ah K suddenly rolled his eyes at me. I think about it too, this question is pretty silly, so I stopped asking, and comforted myself that a life alone is pretty good, didn’t Zhu Deyong say that now two people are the most out and one is the most in? My acquaintance with Ah K is like any bad soap opera.It was in my freshman year that I met her like a ghost on Monday morning, which I hated so much. The special thing about Monday is that there is a flag-raising ceremony, a morning jog, and the first lecture on new social theory. Monday under the triple insurance is absolutely inescapable.In a semi-comatose state, I groped to the lecture hall of the J building and found a seat at the far end of the first three rows. I saw a piece of toilet paper on the table and wiped it.Later Ah K ran over and told me that she had taken this seat, and the evidence was the piece of toilet paper, which she put there in the morning to show that someone was there.

So I sat on the aisle steps and listened to the report, taking notes as I listened.When the wait was over I stood up and my foot was numb like a post-surgery overdose.Half of the reason why I gave up my seat was because I had no evidence to prove that she didn’t put the paper, and the other half was because that day K was unkempt, his face was swollen and his eyes were puffy. I know that people are very angry in this situation, and I dare not continue arguing with her for fear that she will kill me.The rabbit is in a hurry and bites people, not to mention the person in front of him is definitely much more dangerous than the rabbit.

Because Ah K felt that my behavior was very gentlemanly that day, she decided to treat me to dinner. The next day Ah K ordered a large table of dishes, and I ate very hard because it was my meal card.When Ah K ordered the food, he suddenly found that she didn't bring her wallet.I tried very hard to look at her expression, but at the end I still couldn't tell the authenticity of her "sudden discovery", so I had to admit that I was unlucky and took out my meal card and watched the aunt in the cafeteria destroy it. I'm close to a week's worth of meals. The only consoling thing that day was that the appearance of Ah K in front of me could be said to be heaven and earth compared to the last time, girls still have to dress up.Suddenly I remembered what Zhu Deyong said, no woman is bold enough not to wear makeup, and for men, no man is bold enough to let his woman not wear makeup.

Zhu Deyong is the great wise man of the city. It’s just that when my modern literature teacher knew that I was watching Zhu Deyong, he was very sad and said how my aesthetic taste was so low-level. I know that in his eyes I am a complete poor student. All kinds of things are sold on the street at the North Gate. I only think that there is a store that sells CDs and posters that is very clever. The money I spent there is enough to make me live well, at least I won’t be as depressed as I am now. .I put posters all over the dormitory, making the dormitory like my home thousands of kilometers away.There are also countless posters on the wall of my room at home. Similarly, the money I spent is enough for two of them to live quite well.It's just that I haven't been able to find the English version poster of "Dancer in the Dark". I found that poster later in the male dormitory of Shanghai International Studies University on the National Day. The sage said that "life is the accumulation of ten thousand jokes" is really a shining truth.

But Ah K's interests are much wider than mine.From the latest women's clothing to the meat clips on the roadside, from the hardcover version of CLAMP's "Clover" to rice bowls, she always looks like she saw a dinosaur and shouted "ah, there is this".I'm so overwhelmed. When Ah K and I frequented that disgusting road we were tired of walking around, I always thought of "Angels on the Road", but I felt that the two had no connection at all. I'm a boy who doesn't like girls, which is like a terminal illness in college.When it was junior year, the ugliest and most unpopular boy in our class had the opportunity to act as a flower protector—even though his flowers looked like grass to me, I still carried a single shoulder bag in the big garden every day. Shaking around the campus, hands in pockets, shaking his head and whistling. It's not that I can't sell, on the contrary, there was a group of female graduate students from the Faculty of Liberal Arts who chased after me because they had read some disgusting articles I wrote and my face was not ugly or even good-looking.But I politely declined.My interest in them is only that I am eager to know how some people in this kind of poor school miss graduate students and they are from the Chinese Department. I guess they plan to continue to work as Ph.D. students in the future.The people in the dormitory always persuaded me to let it go, these days love between sisters and younger brothers is very popular, you can see that the love between Feng Fei and Fei is almost turning Hong Kong upside down, love in the city.I looked at them and said to them that it is better to leave it to you, and then the guy who poked his head from the upper bunk immediately shrank his head back and stopped talking, his movements were as fast as if he would be beheaded if he was too slow.Some people say that they already have a girlfriend and need to be dedicated.Let me just say it, who doesn't know you, it's not that those female graduate students are not as good-looking as your girlfriends, or you people, turning faces is faster than cheating on exams and flipping books.But those female research students grew up really abstract, so I suddenly told them the well-known joke that there are three types of people in the world, men, women, and female bloggers. But later this joke spread to the Faculty of Arts. As a result, two girls cried, and three girls scolded me for being shameless, and the rest of the girls continued to spread the story. I was famous, or rather notorious, for a while. In the days when I was notorious, Ah K was still very close to me.This moved me very deeply.But I still kept a stiff face and bent down to meet her eyes, stretched out my index finger and swayed from side to side and said to her, don't hang out with scum like me all day, be careful if you don't get married, no one will want you.She always shook her head and said, rest assured that someone wants it, I still have three boys chasing me.When he said it, he ate hot pot without even raising his head.I fully expected that she would look at me with teary eyes like those innocent little girls in TV dramas and say: In my heart, you have never been a scumbag. I was quite devastated. Ah K's habit of eating hot pot was brought out by me. I am from Sichuan. When I ate the first bite of Shanghai cuisine in the school cafeteria, I was depressed and wanted to chat with God, and this idea was very impulsive.My wild hot sauce is still like the title of English lesson 3, it changes nothing.Later I ate some hot sauce and found that the hot sauce was as sweet as ketchup.It's just that the three Shanghainese next to me were stunned by me and forgot to eat, and kept looking at me like I was watching ET. I was very depressed and told Ah K that once a Shanghainese went to Sichuan to eat hot pot. She was so afraid of spicy food that she ordered white pot, but in the end she drank four bottles of 1500ml Coke because the pot had just been made red. The pot is said to have not been cleaned. I wanted to use this story to express my disappointment with Shanghai Pepper. Unfortunately, Ah K heard this story as a joke, so she looked up to the sky and laughed and said that the joke you told was really funny.I just kept my mouth shut, thinking that one day I would drag Ah K to Sichuan. Every Thursday afternoon, I would go to the school’s luxurious gymnasium to play badminton. I would always ask someone from the School of Communication to accompany me to play, because he used to practice badminton since primary school.I struggled with him and it made me quite happy, otherwise I would think that my 700-odd racket was purely used as a decoration, because after playing once with other badminton players, I felt that I can beat them with my left hand too. Every time I finish playing at five o'clock, Ah K will appear at the gate of the gymnasium, holding Mirinda in his hand.I took it and opened it and drank it. Ah K was amazed by the sweat falling drop by drop from her hair, because for students like them who always skipped gym class, they had never seen such a way of sweating.Once Ah K came in to watch me play, and I asked her how she felt, and she said that she didn't feel anything but that you had a murderous look on your face when you played. At the beginning, I thought Ah K was very kind and brought me water every time, but then she hit me hard and said it was because she happened to have a class on Thursday afternoon in the E building next to the gymnasium. I heard that I still didn’t like girls ——Although I never regarded Ah K as a girl. Ah K especially likes to go shopping and I am always the victim.I always tell her how many homework I haven't done and how many books I haven't read but it still looks like the title of the third lesson in English, it changes nothing.Once I threatened her that if I didn’t read the book, I would not be able to pass the fourth level. She looked at me very puzzled and said, you can’t pass the book.I was very annoyed when I heard it, and I said that even if it is the truth, you should not tell it so directly, after all, I am also a flower of the motherland.Then I said very hypocritically and nastyly: I will be so emaciated that I will die.I wanted to disgust her, but she didn't respond, but I was disgusted. When Ah K goes shopping, she always likes to put all my mobile phone, wallet and keys on me, she thinks it is troublesome.And she has a lot of phones, so I always take out the phone from my pocket and hand it to her, and then take it back and put it in my pocket, so stupid.Every time Ah K passed by a beautiful billboard, he was always very excited and danced.Because Ah K's dream was to advertise.I heard something in my heart tremble suddenly, like an inadvertent twitch in sleep.I didn't tell Ah K that that was also my ideal. For a while, I was forced by Ah K to memorize the fourth-level vocabulary, which made me feel that the world was dark.I would be woken up by her phone call at 6 o'clock every morning, and then I heard her tell me on the phone, "It's English time now, please sit at the desk and open a book."The phone calls for three consecutive days made the whole dormitory want to kill me, so I had to get up very early every morning and call her quietly to tell her not to call when I started to recite vocabulary. Because the window in front of my desk is facing the east, I became the person who saw the most sunrise in the school during that month. I found that the sky in the morning was really beautiful, which I had never noticed before. Autumn in Shanghai is very strange. Summer always stretches infinitely to an end and then suddenly falls into late autumn. The temperature suddenly drops, and the leaves fall together as if they had made an appointment. The atmosphere extremely meets the needs of couples.Also satisfied me. When I was young, I grew up in Sichuan. There are evergreen trees everywhere in Sichuan, and they would not drop their leaves if killed.During the Chinese New Year, when the snow falls, it will be green and green, which makes those old people lament that there is no sympathetic person in the world.Why do some things never grow old and some things fade into the afterglow in an instant.My grandmother said this to me. When I stood at the school and watched the leaves of the sycamore tree fall one by one, I felt that the world was still beautiful and worthy of belief. In Ah K's words, it was "very worthwhile to live on". In this way, I stood in this empty university and watched the autumn leaves three times. I lived three years in a daze, and everything seemed like a dream.And it was a long, dreary dream.A dream for three or four years.Ah K and I have turned from 19 to 21 years old, and Ah K said to me more and more frequently, "I am too old to look good".The strange thing is that Ah K and I have always maintained a friendship, which made many people around me feel unbelievable and unbelievable.But I never made any excuses, and neither did Ah K. In this way, we changed from teenagers to adults in our twenties. My chin started to have a layer of blue from the shaved beard, and Ah K was also the first at the first prom of his junior year. Dressed up once, and then danced the first dance with me in dungaree trousers and sneakers, when she was shaky with a smile and I was so embarrassed I stared blankly.Ah K said that it was pretty cool that I had a fierce look in my eyes. But I am still a child, I still put my hands in my pockets to watch the sunset when I walk across the lawn with a shoulder bag on my back, I am still ridiculed mercilessly in the swimming pool by Ah K who has learned to swim since childhood, and I still stand on the tree with fallen leaves The following squinted his eyes and laughed, still playing badminton fiercely in the gymnasium. On my birthday, Ah K gave me a pair of gloves. My birthday is June 6th, and the sun was shining brightly. I took the gloves and didn’t know where to put them. Saying that you will give it back, you will lose all the value of one of the most practical things. Ah K said that this glove was originally given to you by me last year, but can you believe it? Screaming in bed unbearable.It's not complicated when those fingers are warmed up, why don't you try it? I said forget it, who has that spare time.I pointed to the back seat of my bicycle and said, come up and I will take you for a ride as a thank you. I gave Ah K a bracelet for her birthday, and Ah K also gave me face, wearing it on her wrist every day. I spent a Valentine's Day with Ah K. We went to Century Park, screamed in front of the super big fountain, rented a tandem bicycle, and rushed into the woods and knocked a tree. We were tired and looked around. I sit on a chair, but when I sit down, I can't find a place to drink water. I finally found a place to drink, and then I searched for a toilet as hard as I was looking for a place to sell water. During a National Day holiday, we watched fireworks together in Pudong, then came back to People’s Square and walked to Xujiahui, and then waited at the subway station for the earliest subway back to school.During the hour of waiting, we woke up the guard on duty and chatted with him, as if we had known each other for thousands of years.After going back, I slept from dawn to dusk. Ah K told me, who had never read foreign novels, how soul-stirring it was, and I told her how magically Nalan Xingde's words were. Whenever the school is on a long holiday and I don’t go home, Ah K and I like to take out this map of China and look through it, and then tell us where we are going, anyway, it doesn’t take time or money Strength costs nothing.And when the holidays do come, they sleep away from morning till night to pass the time.I pretended to be an elder and said how can a girl be so lazy.She said it's nothing, it's not a girl, it's a woman anyway, look at Shanghai, there are sleepy women running around the streets in pajamas everywhere, I just started working early. The carving knife of time still carved marks on my body. A K said that as we get older, the carving knife will leave the marks from the heart to the face, and then the tortuous scars in the heart will change when we suddenly grow old. Indelible wrinkles on our faces. Sometimes I would suddenly feel depressed and look at Ah K speechless.Ah K and I started to develop a habit in the third year of junior high school, walking from the north gate to the south gate and back again in the middle of the night when there were few people.Sometimes the wind will be very strong, I will not take off my clothes to her like those boys because I think it is contrived, but I will consciously walk in front of her quietly to block the black wind in those dark nights. At the beginning of winter, I was busy writing and didn't have time to take care of my hair, so my hair became very long and tangled, and when there was wind, it would fly up like a hero in a martial arts movie. During the period when my hair was growing wildly, a guy in our dormitory with curly hair who could be a lawyer was crazy about falling in love, falling in love three times a week made me extremely despise his view of love, his name is VAN. VAN's family is very rich. I don't know what movable or real estate his family owns. I only know that wherever he wants to go, a car will stop in front of him after a phone call, and a driver in a black suit will open the door for him.But that kid is kind enough and doesn't have all the faults of other dudes. During that time, the things I wrote the most were my new novel and the love letter I wrote for VAN, which later made me feel like I was a lover. One day, as usual, VAN took me to see a girl he had just spotted and was about to act. I slowly swayed behind his buttocks. The girl in front told me it was her.When I saw the girl clearly, I stood on the spot in a daze for a minute, and then suddenly said to him as if I was out of my body, no problem. That girl is Ah K. I think the love letter I wrote to Ah K is the most painful one I have ever written.I can't write anything like I used to. I met you on a morning when you came and left the fragrance of cherry blossoms, and I would have died laughing. I also forgot what that love letter looked like later, I just remember that I finally finished writing it at night when I drank all the coffee, and then fell asleep on the bed and fell asleep until dawn.Then I got up, brushed my teeth, washed my face and toilet, carried my schoolbag and went to class. Three days later, VAN invited me to dinner, and he said which girl he was chasing.At that time, the cup in my hand suddenly fell down, and the whole cup of water overflowed on the floor, which was very ugly. VAN said you don't have to be so surprised.So I nodded, thought for a while, and said to VAN, invite me to eat hot pot. On the day of eating hot pot, Ah K was late, and I said to her fiercely like before: Girls are trouble.I suddenly realized that Ah K was already VAN's girlfriend, so I was very embarrassed.I don't remember much about that night because I drank a lot, what I do remember is that I threw up a lot that night and had a splitting headache the next morning.My roommate told me that I cried in a low voice that night, but I don't remember crying. The next day I met Ah K at the entrance of the gymnasium after my physical education class. She handed over the Mirinda she was carrying, but I didn't drink it and stood in front of her without saying a word. It was embarrassing for Ah K to stretch out his hand in the air, but I didn't know why I didn't take it as if I was angry. Ah K said, I have a boyfriend. I said, yes, VAN, that's fine. Ah K said, you didn't respond? I said, what should I do?Is it beating gongs and drums to hold a banquet for you, or saying with snot and tears that I can't bear you and you don't want to go? Ah K sighed and said that you are like this.I just want to tell you that I don't have so much time to accompany you. Don't hang around with your bag all the time, don't stand under the tree and watch the fallen leaves all by yourself.Also, be gentle with girls and don't always be alone. When you meet a good girl, go after them. You can't ask girls to take the initiative to chase you. I said forget it, I can't die like this for three years, so take good care of your boyfriend. Ah K said that I just want to tell you that I don't have that much time to accompany you and you can live well by yourself. Then I smiled, still with that disdainful expression.Watching Ah K turn and walk away, the fallen leaves kept falling one by one behind her, I felt my nose was sore. Ah K turned around and said to me, you have to learn to write more love letters in the future, girls still like to be praised. I suddenly wanted to tell Ah K that I wrote the love letter, but I felt disgusted by that.What I opened my mouth to say was that the weather is still so hot, winter won’t come. But the next day began to cool down and cool down.I had a cold, and I walked around school for three days in heavy clothes and a hat and a thick scarf, looking like a fool.During those three days, Ah K asked VAN to give me medicine several times, but I didn't take it there. Then my cold went away suddenly, just as suddenly as I was sick. After I got sick, I seldom saw Ah K. Sometimes I saw her beside VAN in a far away place, wearing red clothes, very red, very red, jumping around in a mess. jump to.Occasionally, I would see VAN carrying her on a bicycle.She sat on the front bumper of VAN, her hair was blown up by the wind and brushed against VAN's face.I suddenly remembered that one night VAN dismantled the rear seat of his bicycle downstairs. I asked him why he removed the rear seat and he said that so that K could sit on his front bumper, which is called shortening the distance.I suddenly remembered that there was a time when Ah K always asked me to use the car to swing her, and I specially installed a back seat for my car. Sometimes I would see VAN and Ah K in the cafeteria. When I walked past them, I would hit VAN on the shoulder and then hit Ah K on the head, and Ah K would always hit back.Then I said goodbye to them with a big smile.When I turned around, I would think of how Ah K and I used to eat 100 yuan and 3 yuan for a meal in the cafeteria. Later, Ah K and I were so unfamiliar that we only met to say hello, and then hurriedly walked over to each other.Finally one day, when I walked by Ah K, she didn't see me.I think it might just be forgetting.At the corner of that intersection, ** was speechless on the wall. Winter is still here, and the winter in Shanghai is dry and cold. There are cuts and holes on my lips, and occasionally blood will flow out when I smile.I also went to the school supermarket to buy men's lipstick, but I couldn't find it.Later I saw VAN using lipstick, his lips are very moist and there is no crack at all. At the beginning of the new semester, I went to choose courses and checked my courses by the way.Afterwards, I entered Ah K's student number very bored, and saw her previous class schedule. It turned out that she didn't have a class in Building E on Thursday afternoon.I suddenly remembered how she was waiting for me at the gate of the gymnasium every Thursday afternoon. The wind blew past her, and her long hair was flying in the wind.I stared at the screen for a long time without making a sound. I finally put on the gloves that Ah K gave me, and the wind couldn't blow my hands at all when I was riding.This is also my first winter without frostbite on my fingers. It's just that I don't know whether Ah K still wears the bracelet I gave her. I was still wandering around the school alone, looking at the bare tree trunks and the fallen leaves all over the ground.Occasionally look up at the sky with a smile on his face.My hair finally became very long, and girls in the Faculty of Arts continued to write love letters to me. On Christmas night, I saw Ah K at the ball. She was wearing the dress she wore for the first time. Every time she looked over, I dared not even look at her, so I quietly left the noisy ball. In fact, I really want to stay in that place to see if she wears the bracelet I gave her.But I don't even have the courage to look at her. I'm afraid that she will be unhappy, but I will feel sad when she is too happy.I felt disgusted by myself like this, so I turned up the collar of my windbreaker and walked out of the gate. That night I went out and walked around the city on the bus. In front of a red light at a certain intersection, I saw the faces of VAN and Ah K on the bus next to me through the glass. I knew it was VAN. Send Ah K home.I was just thinking, why doesn't VAN use his fancy car?I closed my eyes, but the faces of Ah K and VAN still appeared in front of me, but later on, like a glass window in winter, layers of mist formed in the cold morning, and I couldn't see clearly anymore. I leaned against the glass window and fell asleep.Don't want to wake up again. I suddenly remembered that I had also sent Ah K home on weekends before.Ah K always leaned on my shoulders on the bus, always complaining that my shoulders were too thin, and my bones were so uncomfortable.And I always think of seeing that sentence: "My destination will always be your next stop / You go to sleep and gently lean on my back / These long-accustomed farewells / You always thought Down below is my final stop / I'm at the last exit waiting for the last return train." And at the end of this winter, I finally knew Ah K's full name, kid, child, little guy. Because I know you're a worried kid So I put the thread in your hands but I dare not fly too far No matter I fly with the wind to the clouds I hope you can see Even if I occasionally get lost in playfulness, I know you are waiting for me I went home during Chinese New Year, and the train rumbled for 36 hours.During the New Year, I went to many dinner parties and went to many relatives' homes. The 21-year-old still asked for a lot of red envelopes.While I was talking to others about the wealth of money.I finally tasted very spicy dishes from Sichuan again. When I was eating, I thought of Ah K. I suddenly raised my head in the gap between the cups and cups. For a moment, I was in a daze. He was still asleep with his hair down and his eyes half-opened.I suddenly laughed at the table, the pepper choked me to tears a lot. I cycled around the city I grew up in with those gloves on, went to my junior high school, went to my high school, and got sweaty on that tiny pitch. When the end of the new year came, I was wearing a white thick down jacket and the gloves that A K gave me. I held my mouth in my hands and let out big clouds of white gas. I stayed on the balcony of my room and watched the fireworks. I suddenly thought of the dazzling fireworks in Pudong, which exploded and disappeared in the black sky. The flames scattered and fell, and Ah K smiled innocently beside me. Facing Shanghai, thousands of kilometers away, and the brightly lit city, I forgot how to speak for a moment.When I was silent, suddenly there was a text message, I opened it, and Ah K said, I am in Pudong now, and the fireworks in Shanghai are so beautiful. I dialed Ah K on the phone, but I forgot what I was going to say when I heard her voice. I heard the voice of Berlioz Fantasia coming from her phone.I said, Ah K, I have passed CET-4. Then I heard Ah K crying suddenly on the phone, in a very low voice at first, and then the crying became more and more sad. I stood on the balcony and sank in panic. Ah K cried and said, what to do, I suddenly can't remember your face. -Finish-