Chapter 11 graduation song

I still remember two years ago, when I was watching "Love to the End", I saw Ruotong Yang Zheng shouting to the camera together: We graduated!At that time I was drinking water.Seeing their sunny and clear smiles, I feel that happiness is so simple and one-hit. The pure water flows down the throat and flows to the deepest and deepest place, whirling and solidifying.At that time, I was only in the first year of high school. I imagined that graduating from the third year of high school would be a phoenix flower in full bloom. It was so far away from me.Even though it was far away, I ran over there without hesitation, like Kuafu, and staggered down towards the color and result that were destined to be painted as tragic and coquettish as Van Gogh's paintings.

Then the days passed by so unhurriedly, the poet said: When we look back and stop, we will all be amazed, because we thought that only one day had passed, but we didn't know that a year had passed. A certain magazine said that graduation is like a windowpane. I wiped the cold shards and walked past one by one without avoiding them. On the afternoon when I finished the foreign language test, I came out of the test room very calmly. The sun was dazzling and even dazzling. For a moment, the passion and arrogance I had expected were far away from me. I felt that my 19 years of life had been destroyed by the sun. It was easy to penetrate, when I thought that everything was over, I actually felt so sad in my heart.Surrounded by turbulent crowds, excitement and frustration flowed across the campus ground like cold and warm currents. I saw the young faces and colorful moods around me, and thought of theirs and ours. The countless tired nights spent under the orange desk lamp , the lonely star above the head, the sadness gradually dies out.

I thought I would never forget the third year of high school. I thought I could recall every hour of every day at any time, just like looking at my palm prints.But only now, on the third day after the end of the college entrance examination, I already feel vague about those inexplicably sad evenings, like a glass window in a thick fog, and the world outside has become a blur of water vapor, only a feeling of sadness, again and again Again and again and again and again. All I can remember is the carefully bound test papers in my schoolbag, with my serious blue ink and more serious red ink on it, and I always look through them tirelessly as I read novels a few years ago.All I can remember are the thick reference books on my desk, most of which I didn’t have time to do, but I still bought them one by one.Wei Wei said that this is to satisfy the guilt in her heart, and to atone for her wasted time.But what surprised me was that I could clearly remember the name of each book and the arrangement of knowledge chapters.It’s just that I gave them all away on the day I finished the college entrance examination. I didn’t have the courage to face them and those blank exercises, for fear that regret would haunt my future life.I can still remember the phone calls of the teachers of various subjects. During the ten-day vacation before the college entrance examination, I always called them. After their detailed explanations, they gently encouraged me to say: Don't be nervous.I remember the ranking of my mock exam, the panic when I filled out the application, the sadness when I gave up my ideal, the taste of Nescafe coffee, the lonely brilliance of the stars at midnight, and the card I put in the photo frame, which said: Even now there is still hope left.

Remember despair and hope, fighting each other. graduated.Played for two consecutive nights, a large group of friends, beer shaken, opened, foam everywhere, deserted streets at midnight, karaoke hoarse sound. In fact, my graduation appearance is different from what I imagined. I thought everyone had enough passion and was ecstatic as if they had escaped from the sky.But everyone seemed to be losing energy, Wei Wei said that the more she played, the more empty she felt, until she was at a loss for what to do.Everyone was singing, and I told her a story in the noisy singing, there was only a beginning and an ending, but no end, because I forgot, and even I myself forgot what I was talking about after I told it, and only knew what was in my story. Repeatedly appearing in the plains of Mesopotamia, Wei Wei said that she will make this story into a movie in the future—provided she has a lot of money.

Later we sang, until tears came out.I don't know whether to be happy or sad, or neither, and it's even more sad. Sleeping in an open-air park feels like a homeless man myself, and I think of the idiom I have learned.The starry sky above the head looks extraordinarily empty and huge. It feels that if the street lights and neon are not struggling to prop up the black sky, then the innocence will fall down.The surrounding wind is hot and stuffy with a nasty sticky moisture on a summer night.Everyone didn't talk much when they were tired of playing.When CKJ and I were sleeping head to head on the bench, I suddenly remembered many things, and each scene was like a movie.Suddenly, I remembered those hot and frivolous youthful days in my life, and those lonely and angry children who were confused and lonely seemed to be the same as us.An immature face, bright young eyes, a silent smile, bright scars, standing alone on the platform watching the train.It seems that our youth is gradually fermented in such noise and tranquility, hope and disappointment, excitement and depression, happiness and sadness, or it becomes as mellow as wine, or it rots out of control.The moment I turned my head once, I saw Wei Wei and ABO seem to be talking about something on the bench opposite us. ABO looked very sad, but Wei Wei lowered his head and didn’t speak. I wanted to ask, but I couldn’t think about it.

I was reminded again about the parting that had been discussed and has been discussed.The friends around me changed from group to group, and everyone gathered one after another, and then some left in a hurry, while some stayed by my side all the time.I was like a lost child standing on a zebra crossing. The noise, speed, and crowds all disrupted my thoughts and memories. There used to be a saying: A person must learn to choose in his own memory, then he can always be happy. I learned to choose and made the worst choices.I choose to remember the lonely evenings filled with cold rain and the lonely mornings in the cold and windy weather in my life.I remembered the sadness in my life that made me down, but I didn't remember those warm eyes and soft voices.I am a loser.And the stars in the sky are bright and flow forever.

Little A said that he recalled that the first feeling he had after graduating from high school was the dazzling sunshine, the rich green shade and the blooming phoenix flowers.Little A doesn't have a yearbook because he doesn't have many friends, and neither do I, but it's not because he doesn't have friends.I forgot the reason why I chose not to write the graduation yearbook. I just simply felt that if we want to forget each other, then those beautiful pages that will eventually turn yellow will not be able to save the memory of forgetting, and if we miss each other, then even if there is no contact, Still warm.

In the days before we graduated and left, the school played those slightly dark campus ballads repeatedly.In the last few days, Wei Wei and I were counting down by the lake and we could still watch a few sunsets on campus.Those warm but mournful sunsets cut our postures into mournful silhouettes and left them in the floral-scented air. You said that whenever you see the sunset red again, whenever you hear the evening bell again, bits and pieces of memories from the past surge up in your sad heart before it's too late. A lot of people started taking pictures, but I didn't.Wei Wei asked if we could take pictures sometime, and I said yes.But they kept talking like this, and no one said it out. It seemed that they were afraid that once the photos were taken, everyone would go their separate ways, and there would be no reason to get together again.I walk under the tall and straight camphor trees every day, and when I look up, I always think that I am leaving, and the sadness fills me.

On the day of the graduation photo shoot, CKJ stood next to me, and I stood next to Xiaojiezi, and when I pressed the shutter, a flash flashed, and it was frozen. Our senior year.Our nineteen.The day we played ball and played games.Our youth on bicycles. -Finish-