Chapter 21 go all the way

I hung up the phone, tears streaming down my face, I gritted my teeth and walked towards the gate. I don’t know how many times I have walked through that pass, but I have never felt such heart-wrenching pain. The children are free and easy, and their cheerful voices are on the other end of the phone. Both of them promised to be good and good children, and I pretended Saying goodbye to them happily, I never knew that being a mother can shed such hot tears while still barely spelling out such a sweet voice. There were eleven people in the team, no organization, no funds, just a shout, so everyone asked for leave, and squeezed out seventeen days to go on the road. The eleven people were divided into three groups. Our group consisted of four people. The main routes for arranging visits are American communication agencies, church leaders and Chinese students studying abroad.That night, my husband was on the phone and made more than a dozen overseas calls at once. Money?Never mind, the route of the visit has been decided like this, and the money will come when it should come.

After fastening my seat belt, I took the slides out of my leather bag, and one of them was rushed to the airport by a friend just now.The slides are all impromptu. It's a pity to be our friends. We pick out things that others don't do, and disturb our friends. They are all in their studies and careers. People who have achieved something, but they often don’t eat or sleep just to help us—you can’t think about it. When you think about these things, you feel sad and hot, and the five immortals are like rocks and lava, unable to calm down. "We're going to organize a Christian friendship mission to the United States," I called Xiuzhi in a murmur that day, "I want to send some gifts to those American church leaders, and I hope that those gifts can be kept forever and watched every day , I will think of Taiwan. From this point of view, of course it is best to send paintings——I want a few embroidery paintings from you, and I can’t afford them, but I should always pay for the cost of cloth and embroidery thread..."

"Don't, don't," she cried, "I really don't want to, and I don't know what to do. I should do something for the country." Xiuzhi is a simple person who never knows how to promote herself, and only a pure person like her can have such mellow works. She has never been reluctant to sell paintings, and every time she sells, it is for the charity activities of the church. It's embroidered... She donated three paintings, and when I looked at those paintings, I felt that the world was solemn and solemn. At the same time, Wang Lan and Xu Kuncheng also donated.Wang Lan also lent me his painting bag, in which all the framed paintings are placed. I have never mentioned such a rich and heavy thing in my life.

The audio tapes played with the slides were helped by "Brother Xie". The night before we left, we were still grinding in the recording studio, correcting over and over again. He went to the record library for a while, and then went to the control room for a while From here, the sound is also pondering and pondering, always wanting to do the best. It was already early in the morning when I walked out of the recording studio. He sent me back. The car was given to me, and I argued with me: "Sister Zhang, to you couple, I can really say: 'I love you very much.'" I hopped in the car and didn't say a word--didn't know what to say, God knows, all my friends have been too good to me, I can never repay, what a sweet debt!It is not "I always hate that this body is not my own", but "I am very happy that this body is not mine", it is all made up of the kindness of friends.

I turned on the tape recorder and turned it to the lowest volume, imitating how to match the slide show—at an altitude of more than 20,000 feet, time and space?No time to deal with jet lag, I have to go to work as soon as I get off the plane, I may be tired, I will be tired, I have to go to screenings, talk, debate, criticize, talk to people all night, walk myself in the ice and snow He became an ascetic monk, and even gave his children to his grandparents.If we don't work hard in these seventeen days, we will be sorry for ourselves. I feel guilty for asking for leave as soon as the school starts, but I was overjoyed by Huang's promise to take over as a substitute teacher. He wants to tell students how to appreciate Chinese poetry. Every time I talk to him on the phone, it confuses me. , It seems that it is still the freshman year, it seems that they are still sitting in the first classroom of the Chinese Department, and they seem to lean on the railing to see the green Shuangxi and the green hills with bridge pillars like Changhong.But twenty years have passed, and he has become the dean of the Faculty of Arts. He promised to give a speech. I am proud, because there is a talented person who has changed himself from a "freshman" to a "scholar" in more than ten years. friends, but I am even more proud of the society I live in, which allows a poor freshman who is willing to make progress to become the dean of the Faculty of Arts in more than ten years.

The husband's big box contained 170 pictures for the exhibition, which showed the development of early Christianity in China. Those bleak pictures were sometimes a roof in the northwest, and sometimes a mist in the south of the Yangtze River.In order to save money, those photos were all developed by his colleagues in the magazine. There was no darkroom, so they put a black cloth around the bathroom and set it up as a darkroom. Go to the first number? Whoever wants to go to the first number, go quickly, and you will not be allowed to enter for an hour after closing the door!" They washed them day and night, and that's how the one hundred and seventy large wall charts were washed out.Thank God for not giving us billions, if we were rich we could buy every labor, but we don't, we only have friends, we are really rich people.

In addition to pictures, we also print 60,000 stickers. The large ones can be pasted on the rear bumper of the car, and the small ones can be pasted casually like the five-yuan nickel market. The Chinese words "God Bless China" are printed on them. How much does it cost?I don't know, I don't care about money, and I haven't for many years. God will not help a person who helps himself. What I care about is whether I give what I can. I should be anxious to know if I am Pure and flawless, worthy of the daily benefactors. "You were crying," said the husband. "Sister X came to the airport and slipped me this check."

I suddenly wanted to cry again, it was too much, I couldn't bear the love, in fact, there were people offering one after another, ranging from hundreds to tens of thousands, choking love. I think of a beautiful story in the "Old Testament". It is said that King David was on the battlefield, and one day he was thirsty to drink the water from the ancient well in his hometown, Bethlehem.When three warriors knew about it, they rushed across the blockade to fetch cool well water for the king.When David took the water, he trembled at it, and dared not take it in. Then he poured it on the ground, and made an offering to the gods, saying:

"This is their blood, I must not drink it!" Those who help us along the way, are they giving us something?The fact that they gave us money, love and blessings is actually based on their love for God and their country and nation. Everything is so beautiful that we must sacrifice it to the world. When I arrived in San Francisco, the apricot blossoms were in full bloom, and the days began to go round and round, looking down at different clouds on different planes every day, picking up my luggage at different airports, posting exhibition pictures in different auditoriums in the afternoon, and presenting to the audience at night at parties. Talking with different faces, talking about heart-wrenching topics to different passionate voices after the meeting, and giving myself to different beds in different hotels in the middle of the night.

The same thing is going all the way, full of blessings. I still remember standing at San Francisco Airport waiting for a flight to Washington, where the heaviest snow in fifty-seven years had just fallen, and we were the first passengers after the snow sealed the airport. For some reason, when I arrived in Washington in the middle of the night and saw the snow all over the ground, I was able to suppress my emotion. This snow scene is the snow scene of a foreign country, and this white is the white of a foreign land.If you want me to cry, it’s okay, but I have to wait until I am in Saibei or Guanzhong, when I pick an ice pendant under the old tile eaves of my hometown, and when I hold a palm of snow on a bent water reed, the snow scene in a foreign country is at best three-dimensional My Christmas card is a distant and irrelevant landscape, not something that makes people cry.

I still remember, the night I left Washington, Bingyi hugged me and said: "Go with our love." As soon as I hear it, it reminds me of my time in a choir twenty years ago, and she is still the best contralto. I still remember that in New York, Shounan and his friends came to the hotel, and we talked about one o’clock at night, in Boston, in Cincinnati, in Purdue, in Yale, and walked all the way like that. warm current. I still remember that in Oklahoma, the girl picked us up and drove home immediately to bake dry cakes for evening snacks, and in Dallas, the boy delivered two packets of glutinous rice balls at six o’clock in the morning (he must have arrived at five o’clock) set off), then turned around and ran away, I really can't figure out how he got those two packets of glutinous rice balls. I will never forget those days when I handed my cheeks to the new wind to cut, and I used a pair of shoulders to stir up the wind, snow, rain and hail in more than ten states, but I am not cold, and I can still tell people from city to city. The justice of man God, the eternal truth... Walking all the way, wearing a woolen coat and an old shoe given by someone else, March has gradually worn out and February is here, an old coat is enough to keep out the wind, and my eyes are sore that I can still bear tears, the so-called The end of the world is nothing more than putting one foot in front of the other.Sometimes in front of the TV, sometimes in front of the microphone, at tables with good intentions or bad intentions, among Chinese and Americans, amidst the blessings of thousands of palms clasped together, we walked all the way. In ancient times, when a baby was born, the mother would like to go to each house to collect rags to make patchwork clothes for the child to wear, representing the blessings from all families. And when I walked all the way, I felt naked like a newborn baby, but in the blessings of everyone, we made it, we wore beautiful clothes of patchwork, and every seam and fold was full of love, full of love overflowing care. We walked all the way in our Panaji clothes. Postscript: Along with my husband and I were Ruan Danian, the dean of Zhongyuan Institute of Technology, and Rao Xiaoji, the director of the campus fellowship.