Chapter 64 Miscellaneous Memories of the Bullpen - Origin

The word "cowshed" is easy to understand when you hear it.However, whether it is the legal name, but no one can say.Now we talk about "rule of law" in everything.To talk about the "rule of law", we must first rectify the name.But how is the name of "cowshed" correct?The establishment of the bullpen itself is "opposing" the same law.Now if you want to use the law to rectify the name, wouldn't it be the opposite? In Peking University, the word "cowshed" is not popular.The "official" here is called "reform through labor compound", sometimes it is popularly called "gangster compound", the meaning is exactly the same.But the latter is more vivid and specific, so it has become popular among ordinary people.As the name suggests, "gangsters" are not "white gangs".They are dedicated to doing "bad things" secretly, and they sing against the "revolutionary headquarters".The place where these guys are held is called the "gangster compound".

"Young boy, how do you know, bow every time you win!" I was lucky enough to live in the compound in my third life—from a linguistic point of view, the word "live" here should be in passive form—and I lived there for eight or nine months.To say it's comfortable inside is not true.However, a phenomenon like the ten-year catastrophe is absolutely unprecedented in human history-I hope it is also unprecedented-"Life is less than a hundred", I actually bow to it, this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, I have to thank Heaven, especially favored and bless me, so grateful.Otherwise, finding such an opportunity would be harder than getting a camel through the eye of a needle.Not only did I catch up with this opportunity, but I was also able to live in the compound.Just imagine, will someone build a courtyard for me now, and send people to guard it day and night, so that I can be absolutely safe?

I am also a person who studies Buddhism.I not only study the history of Buddhism, but also do some Buddhist teachings.But what interests me the most is not these grandiose Buddhist theories, but some unrefined superstitions, especially the description of hell.This can be found in serious Buddhist scriptures, and it is even more vivid in the oral legends of ordinary people.This is the ordinary people of China and India who gathered the torture and torture they received from the officials, after refining, "removing the dross and extracting the essence, discarding the false and keeping the true", and then formed it. It is a rare masterpiece of human fantasy.Who doesn't feel the creeps and the hairs stand on end at the stories of hell?

I have been interested in studying comparative hell studies for a long time.Having accumulated dozens of years of experience in cold and heat discussions, I know that the Western Hell is a bit too simple, too childish, too monotonous, and too unlevel.If you don't believe me, read Dante's "Divine Comedy".There is a depiction of hell there.Dante's poems are like Huang Zhong Dalu, but the hell described in the poems is really not flattering, without any imagination, too simple and too superficial.It's just amused to read.Looking back at the hell in India, it is really broad and profound.Coupled with the expansion and exaggeration of the Chinese, hell is like a tower of seven treasures, which is dazzling.Those who have read books about hell like the Chinese "Jade Calendar to Treasure Notes", seeing the mountains of knives and seas of fire, oil pans and big saws, complete with a bull's head and a horse's face, complete characters and props, who can't help but be enthralled? What about admiration?Eastern civilization surpasses Western civilization; the wisdom of Eastern people exceeds that of Western people, which can be seen here.

I admire the imagination of ordinary people very much, and I appreciate their description of hell very much.I thought that these fantasies and these descriptions had already been exhausted, and I could add more contempt.However, after I stayed in the cowshed, I suddenly realized that the "revolutionary young general" built the cowshed in broad daylight on the land of Dongsheng Shenzhou, as well as the management measures for the cowshed, as well as the manufacturing of cowsheds in the cowshed. Compared with the Buddhist hell, the terrifying atmosphere far surpasses the original version in India.The hells in the West are even worse, as if a little witch has seen a big witch.

I suspect that some of the young generals who built the cowshed were students of Buddhism with me.I suspect that they learned not only the history of Buddhism and Buddhist teachings, but also the science of hell.Moreover, the theory was integrated with practice. When they built the gangster compound at Peking University, they applied it from far to near, from inside to outside, and became a model for universities across the country to learn from.They are really blue out of blue and better than blue.This alone is enough to prove that my 40 years of teaching activities at Peking University have not been wasted.Although I was invited into the urn myself, I was heartily relieved and couldn't help myself.

There are still some advancers, and this group of revolutionary teenagers has also given full play to their innovative abilities.In this cowshed, there are indeed no mountains of knives, oil pans, bull heads, horse noodles, etc.However, without such necessary props, it can create a terrifying atmosphere far beyond the Buddhist hell, who can begrudge their praise?In the old hell, the bull-headed horse-noodles were nothing more than putting the criminals into the oil pan with a steel fork according to the order of King Yama, and put the fork on the mountain of knives.At best, this can only torture the prisoner's body, and there is absolutely no way to "touch the soul", and there is absolutely no way to "fight selfishness and criticize revision", "struggle hard to revitalize the mind", etc.Under the leadership of their "Lafayette", our revolutionary (?) teenagers at Peking University carried out the activity of reciting quotations in the compound.This is a brand new creation. It has never been heard that the bull head and horse face will make the prisoner recite some Buddhist scriptures, such as "revealing the truth, uncovering the truth, and paramita", and if he recites a wrong word, he will be slapped immediately.The lecture every night is something that never existed in the old hell.When night falls, the prisoners line up for training.Vicious reprimands and crisp slaps echoed each other and merged into the night sky.On the small dirt hill outside the courtyard, in the thin darkness, figures swayed.I lowered my head and glanced sideways, knowing that it was the "free man" admiring the rare landscape in the courtyard, just like admiring the grand occasion of changing the guard of the Royal Forest Army in the square in front of Buckingham Palace in England.At this time, my mood is really not humane.

In short, there are many new inventions in the bullpen.Life inside is both colorful and eerie.Those of us who live in it, day and night, every minute and every second, let the nerves be tensed to the highest limit, let the instinct of the five sense organs play to the highest limit, there are thorns and pits everywhere, and disasters come from time to time.This life, for me, is absolutely unprecedented.For outsiders, it is unimaginable.Although there are no exact statistics on the number of people who entered the bullpen across the country at that time, it must have been tens of thousands.But compared with the national population, it still pales in comparison, and it is only a fractional end.In other words, it is not easy to enter the bullpen, it is a very rare opportunity.Don't people often call on writers to go deep into life before writing?But what writer is willing to come to the gang compound?It is not easy to become a member of the gang, and the conditions that need to be met are still very harsh.

I was one of the few lucky enough to be in the bullpen, almost risking my life to gain some rare experience.In my opinion, these experiences should really be written.Although I am not a writer myself, I have some experience in writing.It is impossible to write by yourself.However, I really don't want to recall that period of life again. I still shudder when I recall it until today, so I don't care if I don't recall it.I have a vague hope, that there is a writer who has squatted in the cowshed, and writes his own unbearable experience vividly and vividly, which will definitely broaden the horizons of readers all over the country and serve The people have done a great job.

But I look forward to the stars, the moon, and the sun in the eastern sky. I have been looking forward to this day. Although I read articles or books written by individual people, I still feel very unsatisfactory. What I want to see has never appeared.People who have squatted in the cowshed, who have this experience and can write with a pen, are free from worries.Why are they all silent?If this continues, when this group of people leave this world one by one in accordance with the laws of nature, those extremely precious and fleeting experiences will disappear without a trace.This is a great loss for humanity as a whole.It is a great mistake for those who have had this experience not to write about it.The most frightening thing is that I gradually discovered that less than twenty years have passed since the ten-year catastrophe, and people have almost completely forgotten about it.When I talk about this disaster with today's young people, and even some middle-aged people, their eyes are often widened, their faces are full of doubts, and they show that they don't understand.It can be seen from their eyes that their heads are full of question marks.They suspected that I was talking about "Arabian Nights" and that I was deliberately exaggerating.They suspect that I have ulterior motives.They were embarrassed to refute me face to face; but their eyes revealed: "Where in the world can such a thing be possible?" I felt very sad, lonely and afraid.

I feel sad because I have narrowly escaped death and experienced this great change, and in the end I didn't get a little understanding, and I didn't get a little sympathy.I don't want others to fully understand and overall sympathize.In fact, what I told them was only bits and pieces, bits and pieces.There are some details that I haven't even shared with my family and friends, and they still linger in my mind.However, my subjective opinion is that those fragments are enough to arouse sympathy in others.The result was just the opposite.So I mourn. I am lonely because I feel that I have reached an octogenarian age, and I am walking alone on the vast land, seeing neither the past nor the future.The old ones are like three autumn leaves, gradually falling away.To me, young people do not understand each other like what the Japanese call "new human beings".Am I going to leave this world with these secrets?So I am alone. I am afraid because I am afraid that once these once-in-a-lifetime experiences are wiped out, the lessons gained at the cost of unspeakable suffering for tens of millions of people will not be able to exert their "social benefits".It may be difficult to learn such a lesson again.So I fear. Aside from my sorrow, loneliness, and fear, I have a firm belief.If the course of this disaster is written out truthfully, it will become a mirror of our great nation.Often take a look in this mirror, there will be infinite benefits.It will tell us what we should do and what we should not do, and there is absolutely no harm in it. In this way, after repeated consideration, I made up my mind to write it myself.Let me solemnly declare here: I will never tell half a lie, and I will never add oil and vinegar.I will write what my experience looks like.One point more is too much, one point less is too little.No matter what others say, I will deal with it calmly, "just wait for the autumn wind to pass by my ears".Lying for favor is a matter of quality, neither what I can do nor what I want to do.I still have confidence in my memory.After the baptism of the purgatory of the so-called "Cultural Revolution", "the sea was too difficult to find water", now I am not afraid of anything.If anyone feels uncomfortable reading what I have written, it feels like they have exposed their own scars;Although I may not be able to write any good articles, but this article is bought with blood and tears, what I write is not a novel.I hope to get the readers' understanding and sympathy on this point. The above is the origin. 1992