Chapter 7 August is young (6)

Who can believe that my first man is Asagao. I didn't let him see the blood coming out of my body, I was afraid it was blue.The dark blue dark blue color is full of lonely guilt.I am no longer a little girl in childhood, I think I am haggard and old.But in my best time, the person I love is not by my side. Asagao.I think of his breath and body, his warm hands on my skin.No one ever hugged me, no one kissed me... This is the only man I have. September has finally arrived.He called me and said that the company wanted to send me to work in Japan for two years.If you will marry me, I will stay.

I said, you are wrong.I love Joe. If you want me to go, I will go.Two years later, if you haven't married yet, I will marry you. I hung up the phone. The typhoon passed.The sky in autumn is a clear blue, the sun is warm and the air is cool.I want to go north. Joe became haggard and depressed, wandering around in urban nightclubs every night, and only came back drunk when it was almost dawn.I like all women with blue eyes and sad smiles, they are like my mother.Including the delicate fragrance on the skin of the mother's fingers.The petals that were once squeezed out of the juice in the palm of my hand.

I took off her high heels.I throw them out one by one.I said my mother fell to her death in high heels.Because she once loved a man, and that man liked her wearing these shoes.She was alone for him, crazy for being alone. she died?Joe buried his face in the bed and made a muffled sound. Yes.She must die.Because life has no meaning to her. Is it you who want her to die? I just want her to take those shoes off.Those shoes that would pop my head off.Those shoes that no longer have any remnants of love. Joe reached out and hugged me.Her long hair covered my face.she cries.She said, I know, you killed her.

I screamed: I didn't, I didn't.I said, I just don't want her to suffer, why, why, does she have to wear those shoes all the time? ! Joe rushed over and hugged my head tightly.She pressed my face to her shoulders and she said, don't be afraid, don't be afraid, honey, I'm here... Her lips were in my hair. I push her away.I said, I don't believe you.I pulled her by the hair, dragged her to the balcony, and leaned her body back against the iron railing.Jo let out a cry of terror as the wind blew away her long hair. I say, tell yourself that men are unreliable.You want to be with me.

Joe was crying in fear, but I love Asami, I miss him every day, and I want to marry him.Her tears fell in the strong wind. I let her go.Seeing her covering her face and kneeling on the ground, I said, what he loves is me, not you.He is going to Japan.You will never see him again.