Chapter 2 Soliloquy of a celibate

I got really drunk the night of my graduation and I couldn't help being drunk!Drunken eyes are blurred and deep, and I see familiar faces disappearing before my eyes.Graduation brought people "Dongfei Shrike and Xifeiyan", but what about me?But like a defeated rooster, it has wings, but it can't fly, not only can't fly, but it has to crawl on the ground! It's really climbing, "creeping forward", "night fighting"... how many climbing subjects are waiting for me, I have been training in the army for six months, and the field troops have been in the field for nearly a year. I don't know how many times I have climbed. In the wind and sand and under the sun, I wiped my sweat with my muddy hands, gasped for breath, occasionally raised my head, and looked at the birds in the sky. I couldn’t name them, but I knew they were all in fly.

The moon went round twenty more times, and I finally set foot on the return warship and came back alive.There is no battle, but there is glory, I can't help but feel ashamed in my heart!After dusting off my body, I went to National Taiwan University again. The azaleas are in full bloom on the campus.It's a pity that there are new faces and new couples interspersed in the flowers, they replaced us, no, replaced myself.They stole my youth and my land. Looking at these nasty little boys, I am not ashamed to be the boss.On the contrary, I feel that I am younger.Since I graduated, I have been attacked by red posts almost every month. In addition to infecting the color of the pen nib and increasing the deficit on the account book, another important meaning is that young people have embarked on the old road of starting a family and holding a baby. Each has its own head, each debt has its owner, each lover has his own home, especially my old lovers in the past, they all go far away, they get married one after another, happy events happen frequently, every day when I open the newspaper, I see rows of bright red wedding couplets. Because of this, I will be frightened first!Occasionally, there is no name on the notice that makes me worry about it, so I smile all over my face, like a boulder falling to the ground, saying that justice still exists in the world, and at the same time sighing deeply that "the people in the advertising department of the newspaper have treated me well"!By extension, all in all, I am now afraid of all red things except the red paper bag given by the old lady on New Year's Eve!

My old friend advised me to make a comeback, my old classmate advised me to start anew, and the old lady ordered me to hold her grandson for her within a limited time.But what's the use of worrying?I can't dance, I don't go to church, I'm not good at talking cute nonsense, I don't ignore the fourth dimension of etiquette, morality, and shame, and I'm no longer a co-ed college student... Under self-reflection, there is no condition that can attract girls to look at me more One glance!Although there are many younger sisters in my family, they are too familiar with my history of the rise and fall of the sea of ​​love in the past. Although there is a possibility of helping, the young ladies have many eyes and occasionally offend me. It's not good, after much deliberation, taking the younger sister's route is also a dead end!

Look at this is really helpless!So I lit a cigarette and started to worry.It’s okay not to drink tea; it’s okay not to eat rice; it’s okay not to drink wine; it’s okay not to smoke cigarettes.I think that during the American Civil War, General Lee suffered a complete defeat because he didn't like smoking; General Grant prospered because he loved smoking.It can be proved from this that love can be lost, head can be broken, and cigarettes must be smoked. Anyone who loses love and does not smoke is either a defeatist or a guy who is "different from beasts". When I got the 109th New Paradise, I suddenly realized my heart, thinking that since "time is not with me" and "women are not with me", why not advocate celibacy?A man who does not advocate celibacy for a while in his life, as Bacon did, is like Venus losing his arm.In other words, a dignified seven-foot man like the author of this article must spend a period of his life hating women and families, having no golden house to hide, no children to teach, no face to look at, and no care to accompany.There is no one who can be wronged...but alone, communicating with the spirit of heaven and earth, inviting you to travel in the land of nothingness, the vast wilderness, and the waves to make yourself comfortable, what a boldness this is!What a realm!What about An Nengxiao's affectionate little children, snot and tears!

right!Completely the original case, I threw away the cigarette and started to shoot the case.Being single can not only avoid the burden of wives and children, but also prolong life: Newton was not married, but lived to be 80 years old; Kant had no wife, but lived to be 84 years old; Michelangelo was single all his life, but lived to be 80 years old There are nine, celibacy is of great use!It can not only postpone "being called by the Lord", but also be a great man. No wonder the ancestors have to train us with "a gentleman must be careful about his independence"! However, here lies the problem. The feat of celibacy is not fun after all. If you are not "cautious", you will become a Fafei fool described by France, or become a monk Yutong in the Song Dynasty. --Xin Fifty-two years of hard work, in the end, it's not all the same!Moreover, longevity is meaningful to a person who has the blessing of living together with five generations. If you are alone, a lonely old man, no old woman to quarrel, no grandson to beat your legs, why live so long?Moreover, "old age is not death is called a thief", the sages have clearly taught it, although "precepts are gained" in old age, but a lonely family, after all, his behavior is suspicious, maybe someday there will be some treasure robbery case, and he will be implicated. After being given the posthumous title of an old pickpocket, he died, and he was tired of being famous, so why bother?

From this point of view, celibacy and so on are really impossible. Since the body is not available and I am alone, the decision I just made had to be unavailable.So, I had to connect the 109th new paradise. The smog reminded me of a past event: It was a morning when no fried dough sticks were bought. My beautiful Miss Six, with the expression of an old nun in Huihua Hospital, put the photos of Rob Weiner hanging all over the wall one by one. I picked them off, and put them away one by one, ready to be donated to the bottom of the box.At that time, I bowed to the occasion and was dumbfounded.Because I have admired Luo for a long time and is the most admired male star of my Miss Six. His photos are all over the wall and we are not even allowed to touch him. Fortunately, I have been a gentleman for a long time and have long since stopped standing "under the rock wall".Therefore, the eyes are the least.But this time, Miss Six unexpectedly made such a sudden change, which is outrageous.The old lady was afraid that something might go wrong, so she ordered me to inquire.After questioning, Miss Six burst into tears and said: "Rob Weiner and the sinister actress Najie Lihua got married this year, so I will take down the photos first, but I don't have to burn them, because they are going to get divorced anyway!"

Miss Six's categorical words gave me a great inspiration: Why should I think of my old age so miserable?If there is a year off, I can definitely wait until the return of my old lovers, "clothes are not as good as new, people are not as old", except for the sunset glow of Wushan, where are there clouds? Goethe fell in love with the daughter of his old lover in his later years. This behavior in the West did not meet the requirements of our state of rites and righteousness. It is not appropriate to have such unreasonable thoughts; Zhang Ziye, a great poet in the Song Dynasty, was still married at the age of eighty-five. Even Li Shizeng has to prostrate with the ten-fold prostration when he is old and strong. As long as I, Li Ao, grow old and firm after a long time, I am not pessimistic and do not die early, so why not be a white-haired bridegroom and white-haired Pan Lang?Why be like these young men.If you live in a big family, you may publish a newspaper to brag, or ask a matchmaker, or fly a letter to apply for a job, or queue up in front of the girls' dormitory to register, or ask Mrs. Angie for advice... So elegant, so uncontrollable, God hates it!God hates it!

Feelings have been decided, I am determined to follow Miss Six, and do the same, sealing and filing the photos and relics of my old lover scattered in front of my eyes one by one, and blaming myself: "Let's just take a spoonful of water. I can't drink it. Black hair is less, I hope to grow old together; I can't be in love forever, I hope to be a blue bird!" After speaking, I went out and bought a book in the shop. The beauty is not in love"; listen to the white light singing on the road, the title of the song is "I'm waiting for you to come back".So he returned and fell asleep, not knowing the sun in the east.

1961 Women's Day in Taipei "Four Seats House" (United Daily News) Supplement March 12, 1961