Chapter 9 The essence of love is sex + jealousy?

The wives in Jin Yong's novels generally have one characteristic: there are very few fierce mistresses and aunts, but there are many vicious and jealous elder wives. "Three sons" are generally absolutely weak characters. For example, Lihe Taichong's wife Ban Shuxian, Li Gongsunzhi's wife Qiu Qianchi, and Li Bujie's wife Mute Granny are all well-known jealous and powerful women. When they pack up their rivals in love, it can be said that they are stepping on a stone to leave a mark, and scratching an iron mark.Qiu Qianchi "threw Rou'er into the love flowers" and "that lowly servant girl died of pain"; Ban Shuxian blindly poisoned Wu Gu's "face swollen like a pig", almost Died.

Why does Mr. Jin Yong have a bad impression of the old lady, but he has more or less sympathy for the aunts? I don't want to speculate.Here I will only talk about the topic of gender: How did the originally intimate relationship between the sexes gradually alienate and then collapse? Flipping through a magazine a few days ago, I read a sentence that said, "The essence of love is sex + jealousy".I should have habitually scoffed at such arbitrary conclusions.But looking back and thinking about it, it can really explain something. At the beginning of love, it was originally "sex and jealousy".I believe that He Taichong and Ban Shuxian, Qiu Qianchi and Gongsun Zhi have all been in love once.For example, Qiu Qianchi and Gongsun Zhi, they really had a romantic beginning: the girl Qiu Qianchi quarreled with her elder brother, and in a fit of anger, she came out to wander the rivers and lakes, strayed into the Valley of Unrequited Love, met Gongsun Zhi who was a few years younger than herself, and fell in love so much Inextricable.How similar is this beginning to the encounter between Guo Jing and Huang Rong.Didn't Huang Rong just quarrel with her father, couldn't communicate, then ran away from home and met Guo Jing?

Qiu Qianchi recalled the time when they were in love: "After we got married, I not only taught all my martial arts, but also took good care of his food and clothing, so I didn't need him to worry about it." Since they are so affectionate , of course it has sex, otherwise how did Shui Lingling's daughter, Gongsun Lue, come about? He Taichong married Ban Shuxian in order to repay his kindness, and Ban Shuxian helped him fight for the head of the family.Since it is a repayment, of course it must be repaid in an all-round way, and the public rations must be paid in full. Jealousy at this stage is shallow and frequent. Even if there are some suspicions and noises, they are often just like salt grains in the river of love.

As time goes by, the passion fades, and some marriages begin to enter the "sexless and jealous" phase.He Taichong and Ban Shuxian are typical representatives of this stage.When people reach middle age, the interval between sex gradually changes from seven days, ten days, and twenty days to infinite length, and there is no new growth point for love.He Taichong used the excuse of having no children, and married from the "second aunt" to the "fifth aunt". What can Ban Shuxian do?Only jealousy. Let's compare it: Duan Zhengchun's lovers were so jealous, they kept saying "kill this bitch" and "kill that bitch" to each other, but there was no real bloodshed incident; To control Wugu's life.Why?

Because Duan Zhengchun and his partners have been in the previous stage of "sexuality and jealousy", no matter how many rivals Qin Hongmian and Ruan Xingzhu encounter, they still believe in their beauty in front of their lover The status in the eyes of the spouse. What Ban Shuxian experienced was the jealousy in the latter stage, which is much more terrifying, often accompanied by a painful sense of powerlessness, deep and strong, it can be described as raining blood in the sky and crying at night.Don't most of the truly tragic incidents of hand-to-hand killing of rivals in the Jianghu happen at this stage?

Of course, there are still some couples who have worked hard and survived.They have seen through and seen through, and they can be calm and play their own way.Then congratulations to them, they have finally entered the last stage of "no sex and no jealousy".It is the fossil stage of marriage and the tomb of love. These fossil couples have gone through the first two stages, and feel that the road is too bumpy and exhausting, so they don't want to start over again.They would rather maintain a formal marriage and make do with it.If they get along well, there will be communication and support between them, and that will be another kind of joy in life.

There are all kinds of couples in the world, and some people spend their whole lives playing in the first stage, such as Duan Zhengchun and his lovers, they have a lot of fun and excitement.Some are always in the second stage. Those who have played well, such as the love triangle between Tan Gong and Tan Po and Zhao Qiansun, fight and jealous every day, and have been tossing and tossing until they grow old; Stop it, just crash the game, and play yourself into hell. I can't tell you which stage is good and which stage is bad.Fireworks are vigorous, but easy to hurt people; fossils have no vitality, but are stable in nature.How can life be as you wish? The tacit understanding will last forever in our hearts, and we will cherish it while doing it.