Chapter 28 Act 26 The Trial of Taft

The scene is the same as Act 1. God Li: (Stands up, hits the gavel) Now announce the opening of the 26th court of the "Last Judgment" (sit down).Biography accused the 27th President of the United States William Howard Taft (William Howard Taft). (Taft stands up.) God Lee: You are Taft, born in 1857, the 27th President of the United States. Taft: I am. God Lee: You are 332 pounds, the fattest president of the United States ever.Too fat to get stuck in the bathtub of the White House, the White House had to design a bathtub for 4 people, didn't it? Taft: (laughing, a little embarrassed) Let it be.

God Lee: When you were a lawyer, you were waiting for a train in a small town where the express train didn’t stop. You had an idea, and you telegraphed the chief, asking if the express train could stop for a large party, but the train stopped and you just went up You are alone, the train conductor is surprised, but you say: "Drive, I am a large party." (You can go ahead. I am the large party.) Isn't it? Taft: (laughing, a little embarrassed) Let it be. God Lee: Even so, why did you answer like this twice? Taft: Because I don't remember much. God Li: You can’t remember the names of the 8 newspapers and 8 journalists who are with you, so they protested to you. Is there such a thing?

Taft: (Thinking for a while) That's true. I remember a reporter took a picture of the table at me, but I forgot his name. God Lee: His name is Dick Lindsay. Taft: Oh, it's him. God Li: He interviewed in front of you all day long, but you actually told his boss that you didn't know him, which almost caused him to be fired by the boss.You are so big and melted. Taft: I am big and simple, but I am very clear about big things. For example, I created the term "Dollar diplomacy"—— God Li: Come to harm China. Taft: (laughs) Other countries are also suffering. God Lee: Other countries are sweating to hurt you, but you, the United States, are enjoying the benefits. You don't sweat a drop, you just follow the cheap. "Golden-dollar diplomacy" is such a big deal to pick up cheap. It is an economic force other than military power and diplomatic power to carry out economic infiltration and aggression. You publicly said that the "golden-dollar diplomacy" policy is an extension of the "Monroe Doctrine". "The Monroe Doctrine"!After Monroe died and came back to life, he was ashamed to advocate the "Monroe Doctrine", right? (points to Monroe) Excuse me, President Monroe, won't you?

Monroe: (stands up) We 19th century Americans really don't understand 20th century Americans (sit down). God Lee: In the 19th century, most of you were still making trouble in the Americas. It is hard to imagine how to make trouble in Asia. However, President Taft was the first to have the distinguished qualifications of being a toubob in Asia. After the "Spanish-American War", you took over the Philippines, and the first governor who was killed here and there was none other than Taft... Taft: I protest to God Lee that I did not kill and kill. It is the US military that kills and kills. The leader is General MacArthur (Douglas MacArthur) and his father.

God Li: Didn't you kill and kill? You served as Philippine Commissioner from 1900 to 1901, and as Governor of the Philippines from 1901 to 1904. The Filipinos established their own independent republic as early as January 23, 1899. You, the United States, suppressed their legal government and independent country, and you even captured their first 1st President Emilio Aguinaldo, you are the head of the United States in the Philippines, are you not responsible? Taft: We are the victors of the "Spanish-American War". We legally acquired the Philippines from Spain. God Lee: Who does the Philippines belong to?Turn around by you?Have you asked the Filipinos?What's more, during the "Spanish-American War", in order to gain the support of the Filipinos, you made a promise to support the independence of the Philippines. Aguinaldo also participated in the siege of the Spanish on May 1, 1898. As a result, you Americans can't speak Let's be honest, the so-called support for Philippine independence turned out to be "tens of millions of people killed".

Taft: I served as the governor of the Philippines for three years, and in 1905 I became the Secretary of the Army. The account of the Philippines cannot be entirely charged to me. God Lee: What did you do in 1905?You met Japanese Prime Minister Katsura Katsura in Tokyo, and you promised that Japan would let go of North Korea, as long as it would not hit the Philippines. You reached a secret agreement with Japan, and President Roosevelt immediately agreed to it, didn’t you?Just ask old Roosevelt. Roosevelt Sr.: (stands up) That's true (sits down). God Lee: (laughs) Later, in 1912, the two of you fell out for the presidency. You said that Taft was "a fathead that had an intellect a little short of a guinea pig".It seems that in colluding with Japan to sell Asia, your intelligence is equal to that of guinea pigs.Tian Wei Japan later fought the Philippines.The most ironic thing is that on June 9, 1942, all of your Americans in the Philippines surrendered after the 80,000 U.S. troops first surrendered. You want the Filipinos to follow suit, but the Filipinos are not as cowardly as you Americans. He fought a guerrilla war with the Japanese for 3 years.What a shame!You occupied the Philippines, but you could not protect the Philippines from Japanese aggression.Unfortunately for the Filipinos, they were first occupied by Spain, then by the United States, and then by Japan.

Roosevelt: (Trying to stand up, but unable to stand up) I am the President of the United States who truly guaranteed the independence of the Philippines. I am the Roosevelt behind the old Roosevelt. We promise the independence of the Philippines in 10 years. God Lee: Finally the truth came out.The good thing is that 10 years after you think, it was the Philippines thanks to your American economic panic of 1930, your capitalists and laborers, in order to relieve the pressure of competition in the Philippines, through the 1933 Hale-Hoss-Katin The Hare-Hawes-Cutting Bill and the 1934 Tydings-McDuffie Act (Tydings-McDuffie Act) stipulated tariffs and quotas on Philippine goods as the price for promising Philippine independence 10 years later.You finally realized that making the Philippines independent is more beneficial to the United States than making it a state of the United States. That's why you decided not to give up the Philippines, didn't you?Roosevelt, you still have the nerve to take the credit! (Roosevelt and Taft exchange a glance.)

God Lee: Look at how you treat the Philippines! In 1898, you snatched Guam and the Philippines from Spain in Asia.The Philippines fought for independence. During the US-Philippines War from 1899 to 1902, the United States mobilized more than 126,000 troops, spent 400 million U.S. dollars, and killed more than 4,200 people, including hundreds of thousands of Filipinos.You have ruled the Philippines for nearly half a century. In the end, it was wonderful. You didn’t want it. In 1946, it was released.One of the reasons is that the Philippines had a population of nearly 20 million at that time. If it were to become a state of the United States, how many quotas and resources would be allocated to you!You would rather just have Clark Air Force Base and Subic Bay Naval Base, how cheap that is!

Roosevelt: But at the end of the day it must be admitted that we promised to make it independent and we kept it. God Li: Do you dare to say yes?When did you agree?Don’t forget that independence was your guarantee to the Filipinos in 1898. You said you would be independent after defeating the Spaniards. As a result, you delayed for 48 years and killed hundreds of thousands of Filipinos. The righteous man under Macario Sakay... The policy that the President of the United States blatantly stated is: a policy that would "civilize and Christianize" the Philippine people before recognizing their independence. .What are you that can be so obsessive and enthusiastic about people?

Roosevelt: But we elevated the Philippines after all. God Lee: Ascension?Want to hear the statistics?When you ruled by the United States, the average life expectancy of Filipinos was only 30 years old, and 4 out of 5 babies died. You occupied the Philippines, but you could not protect it. After you killed hundreds of thousands of Filipinos, you were killed by the Japanese Hundreds of thousands, what kind of imperialists are you, and finally found that it was not worthwhile for you, and you snatched it and then gave it away. You Roosevelt mean that the Philippines should thank you for the United States. Your statement is too shameful, right?Alright (turning to Taft), the overall symbol of your Governor Taft is your American imperialism in the East. Although you also served as the Governor in Cuba, compared with your experience in the Philippines, you can’t catch up with this paragraph .Finally, let's take it easy and play some music.Start now.

(A duet of 6.) God Lee: Can you hear me?President Taft. Taft: (confused) I think I have. God Lee: At least you heard it in your sleep.You are so fat that you often fall asleep in public.Once you fell asleep in broad daylight and your Attorney General George W. Wickersham jokingly suggested that you perform Donizetti's opera "Lucia di Lammermoor" ), because this opera can wake anyone but the dead.As a result, opera still fails to wake you up.Viksham sighed and said, "The President must be dead." Now this opera is being played in court. Taft: Haha, don't I live to hear it now? God Lee: Alive?Don't forget, this is the trial of the dead. Carter: (standing up, pointing at himself) I'm not dead, am I?Am I dead? Bush Sr.: (standing up, pointing to himself) I'm not dead, am I?Am I dead? Clinton: (standing up, pointing to himself) I'm not dead, am I?Am I dead? Bush Jr.: (stands up, points to himself) I'm not dead, am I?Am I dead? Obama: (standing up, pointing at himself) I'm not dead, am I?Am I dead? God Lee: (coldly) On this point, there is no dispute, because—in the eyes of God, the living are also dead. (The defendants let out an "ah".) God Li: Retire from court (beat the gavel and stand up). (The curtain falls.)