Chapter 61 TECHNIQUE 54 Accidental Flattery
This joy-spreading technique is called casual flattery.Once, I was at a small dinner party and everyone was talking about space travel.The man sitting to my left said, "Lil, you're probably too young to remember what it was like when Apollo 2 landed on the moon, when..."
I don't remember at all what the man said next, I just remember smiling to myself and trying to move to look at my younger self in the mirror.In fact, of course I remember what happened in February 1969, and I, like everyone else in the world, clung to the TV watching the astronaut Armstrong's 9½ boots on the moon.I wasn't thinking about going to the moon at the dinner, though.I was so happy that I could only think that this man thought I was too young to remember what happened in 1969.I think he said it in passing, and it must not be false. His words are absolutely sincere.
Now I look back and think about it.He probably knew I was old enough to remember the astronauts landing on the moon, and the technique he used was what I call accidental flattery.It didn't bother me at all, though, and I still enjoy it in retrospect.So it so happens that flattery is about making compliments a secondary part of speech and saying them in parentheses.
Be an undercover agent when complimenting someone.Sneak compliments into your speech. However, remember not to ask others what is the point of what you just said.Because your flattery temporarily deafens them, and they cannot hear what follows the praise.
So far, we've looked at four types of surreptitious compliments: aunts and wives, honorable missions of carrier pigeons, implied compliments, and incidental flattery.There are times, however, when outright praise comes into play.The next technique will allow you to better master this high-risk, high-reward compliment.
Be an undercover agent when complimenting someone.Sneak compliments into your speech. However, remember not to ask others what is the point of what you just said.Because your flattery temporarily deafens them, and they cannot hear what follows the praise.
So far, we've looked at four types of surreptitious compliments: aunts and wives, honorable missions of carrier pigeons, implied compliments, and incidental flattery.There are times, however, when outright praise comes into play.The next technique will allow you to better master this high-risk, high-reward compliment.