Chapter 18 Tip 15 Taboo: Naked cities
You're not so stupid as to go to a banquet naked, are you?In the same way, I hope that when you encounter the two questions that you must ask at the banquet, the answers you will say will not be sloppy, and people will not be able to extend them. These two questions are "Where are you from?" and "Where are you tall?" At once?"
Most people are asked these two questions, and when they answer, it's like throwing a cold steak on someone's plate, saying a geographical name or title, and then shutting up.
You are talking now.Of course, people who meet you will ask, "Where are you from?" If you throw him a short city name, bare and unadorned, "Oh, I'm from Muscontin, Iowa" ( Or some place they have never heard of) The other party may not be able to squeeze out any response other than staring blankly.Even if you are a hipster in a big city, like Denver, Colorado, Detroit, Michigan, or San Diego, California, unless the other person is an American geography professor, you will look panicked and try to find something to talk about. arrive.Their minds are constantly spinning, thinking, "What should I do, what should I say next?" Even if the city you report is a world-class metropolis, such as New York, London, Paris, Los Angeles, etc., it may be difficult to trigger a reaction. Enthusiastic response.How can I expect people to react if I just say I'm from New York every time? "Uh, have you seen any hooligans recently?"
So, remember to conform to human nature, and do yourself a favor, remember, to answer this question, don't end it with just one sentence.When answering the question "Where are you from?", add some gasoline to the opponent's fuel tank and some grain to the feed trough.At least provide some material for the other party to chew on before the conversation can continue.You just need to add a sentence or two, talk about the city you live in -: tell an anecdote, talk about your observations - so that the other person can enter the conversation between the two of you.
A few months ago, a chamber of commerce asked me to be a keynote speaker on building relationships and how to become a great conversationalist.Just before my speech, I was introduced to Mrs. Devlin, who heads the Chamber of Commerce.
"Hello." she said.
"Hello." I replied.
Then Mrs. Devlin smiled and waited anxiously for an enlightening demonstration from my master conversationalist.I asked where she was from.She did throw me a tough steak, said curtly, "Columbus, Ohio," and smiled expectantly.I must quickly defrost this steak and digest it.My mind raced quickly.Lil thought pattern: "Quick, gulp, Columbus, Ohio. Well, never been there. Oops! What do I know about Columbus? I know a guy named Jeff who lives there and is A very successful speaker. But Columbus is so big, it would be a bit stupid to ask her if she knows Jeff... Only children play this game of who do you know?" I continued in a panic Conducting a silent search, "I think that city should be named after the navigator Columbus... But I'm not sure, so it's best not to mention this." Next, four or five thoughts flashed through my mind, but they were all rejected by me. Once excluded, because no matter how you ask, it will appear too deliberate, like a kid, like a madman.
Several seconds had passed since the clock ticked, and Mrs. Devlin was still standing there, the smile fading away bit by bit.She's still waiting for me (a so-called "expert" who'll be teaching her chamber of commerce in less than an hour, a conversation session) to spit out some wise, quick-witted words.
"Oh, Columbus," I muttered in despair, and saw the worry clearly written on her face, as if the patient was being wheeled into the operating room, and the doctor picked up the scalpel and asked, "Okay, tell me now, you Where is the cecum?"
As a result, I couldn't spark any interesting conversations about Columbus after all.However, with this under-the-radar experience, I later developed the following technique, which I call taboo: the naked city.
Every time you are asked this archaeological question, "Where are you from?" Never answer with just a few words, it is very unfair to challenge the other party's imagination. Do your homework first, see what interesting anecdotes or characteristics there are in your hometown, and provide clues to the other party, so that the conversation between the two will not be disconnected.When you throw the bait and get a playful and witty response from the other party, you have already left a good impression on the other party that you are good at talking.
When fishermen fish, bass and horse mackerel use completely different baits.Obviously in a conversation, your dialogue bait should also be adaptable when facing a simple shrimp or a sophisticated shark, everything depends on the person you are talking to.I am originally from Washington DC. Let’s say I’m in an art gallery today and someone asks me where I’m from. I might answer, “Washington, DC, this city was designed by the same urban planner as Paris.” Such a quote, maybe We will further talk about the art of urban design, about Paris, about the design of other cities, about European travel, and so on. If I'm talking to a bachelor at a social dinner, I'll switch gears and say, "I'm from Washington, D.C. I left because, as a kid, the city had 7 men to 1 sex." Then the conversation turns to The beauty or depression of single life, you can't find a man you like everywhere, and there is even a flirtatious meaning in it. When I meet a political group, I will choose a recent current event as an introduction based on the rapidly changing political situation in the capital.If you think about it with your stomach, you know how rich the next topic is. So, how do you find the material for the introduction?You can start by calling your local chamber of commerce or historical society; or connecting to the Internet and typing in the name of your hometown;It is also good to read history, geography, business statistics, or discover some interesting anecdotes about customs and customs.
Every time you are asked this archaeological question, "Where are you from?" Never answer with just a few words, it is very unfair to challenge the other party's imagination. Do your homework first, see what interesting anecdotes or characteristics there are in your hometown, and provide clues to the other party, so that the conversation between the two will not be disconnected.When you throw the bait and get a playful and witty response from the other party, you have already left a good impression on the other party that you are good at talking.
When fishermen fish, bass and horse mackerel use completely different baits.Obviously in a conversation, your dialogue bait should also be adaptable when facing a simple shrimp or a sophisticated shark, everything depends on the person you are talking to.I am originally from Washington DC. Let’s say I’m in an art gallery today and someone asks me where I’m from. I might answer, “Washington, DC, this city was designed by the same urban planner as Paris.” Such a quote, maybe We will further talk about the art of urban design, about Paris, about the design of other cities, about European travel, and so on. If I'm talking to a bachelor at a social dinner, I'll switch gears and say, "I'm from Washington, D.C. I left because, as a kid, the city had 7 men to 1 sex." Then the conversation turns to The beauty or depression of single life, you can't find a man you like everywhere, and there is even a flirtatious meaning in it. When I meet a political group, I will choose a recent current event as an introduction based on the rapidly changing political situation in the capital.If you think about it with your stomach, you know how rich the next topic is. So, how do you find the material for the introduction?You can start by calling your local chamber of commerce or historical society; or connecting to the Internet and typing in the name of your hometown;It is also good to read history, geography, business statistics, or discover some interesting anecdotes about customs and customs.