Chapter 31 Cultivate children's good character

When a child grows up a little bit, he will form his own unique personality. At this time, his diseases are not all inherited from his parents, but his own personality will also have an effect on the body. We have previously divided a person's life into four seasons of spring, summer, autumn and winter. Among them, the age of 1-18 is spring, and the time for children before puberty is the spring of spring, when all things grow.Spring belongs to wood, so the child not only belongs to the line he belongs to, but also the line his age belongs to, which is wood.Therefore, in terms of age, children also perform wooden transport.

Moving wood is a good time for Liyangmu.Yang wood can stand, be merciful.Therefore, we must educate children to learn to be self-reliant, to do their own things by themselves, and not to always be used to him, to do everything for him, to let the children stretch out their clothes and open their mouths when they eat, which is the biggest harm to children.At the same time, it is also necessary to cultivate children's compassion. Children are very compassionate and kind-hearted, so we must maintain it.If the above two points can’t be done in time, then it’s bad, Yinmu is here: the child will become very stubborn, the parents will not listen to what they say, they will not admit their mistakes if they do something wrong, they will do what they want, they will want what they want, what they don’t want Whatever you want, Nine Cows will not turn back.This kind of child is either unable to support himself and depends on adults; or he does not understand compassion and has a hard heart.I have seen a child who enjoys lying on the ground and strangling ants to death. I heard that some children like to catch sparrows, cut off their feet, and then let them fly. The sparrows fly up and then fall down, spilling blood all over the yard. Yes, but he clapped his hands and laughed--this kind of child is terrible.These two kinds of children are prone to illness, and the more serious the circumstances, the more serious and strange the illness may be.

If there is Yin wood, it is easy to get diseases of the liver system, ranging from dizziness, toothache, vision loss, to convulsions and hepatitis in severe cases.If these diseases are serious, of course you have to go to the doctor first for treatment. "Emergency treats the symptoms". Besides, children are not like adults. When they have convulsions or severe stomach pains due to hepatitis, how can they listen to your advice?After medical treatment, the child's condition has stabilized and the pain has been relieved, so we can start persuading him: "Is the stomach ache uncomfortable? Do you know why it hurts? It's all because of being disobedient and disobedient!"

"Don't abuse small animals in the future, they will hurt too. If you kill them, they will infect you with germs after they die." "A good boy can't be lazy, and if he is lazy, he will get sick."  … And so on, when the child is happy, look for opportunities to babble, don't babble too much, otherwise the child will start to get annoyed and complain again. As for those minor ailments like dizziness and toothache, it would be easier to deal with, you can try not to use medicine first.I used to suffer from these two diseases when I was a child.Sometimes, when I shouted dizziness, the adults would say: "I'm not obedient, I'm dizzy." Although I couldn't fully accept this sentence, I could vaguely feel the connection between dizziness and disobedience, so I regretted it a bit. I secretly start to admit my mistakes, and gradually my head will not be dizzy. This is a common thing.Dizziness is caused by yin wood; wrong recognition produces yang water, and yang water produces yang wood.

What impressed me the most was that once I had a toothache and it hurt so badly, my father said: "I heard that boiled eggs with poplar mushrooms are good for toothaches. Let's go pick poplar mushrooms together." I went with him.The poplar trees were all on the bank of the river, so we followed the stream and looked for them on the trunk of a poplar tree.After the rain in summer, the small river flows happily, the grass is green and the willows are green, which makes people feel comfortable.However, I sympathized with my short-sighted father and couldn't find poplar mushrooms. Fortunately, I could find them. I found all the poplar mushrooms in our basket, and I climbed up the trees to pick some of them!I was very happy all the way. I don't know when, the toothache no longer hurts.That was a very fond memory of my childhood.My father doesn't know how to persuade the sick. Maybe he really wants to pick poplar mushrooms for me to eat, or maybe he just wants to take me out for a walk so that I can distract myself from the toothache, but his approach is completely in line with the principle of persuading the sick. of.It's not just a matter of diverting attention. If you use other methods to divert attention, the effect will certainly not be so good.A sick child is more dependent and lazy. If you just let him lie down blindly, it will easily cause the wood to go against the water, which will only aggravate the condition; but Mu Nengli, my father took me out and asked me to find mushrooms by myself. And let me pick them from the tree with my own hands, which gave me a feeling of self-reliance-I picked mushrooms to treat myself!As soon as Yangmu rises, my toothache will be cured before I eat poplar mushrooms.

In other cases, the child has a dark personality and is disobedient. When someone disciplines him, he dare not get angry. He knows that he is not as powerful as an adult, and resisting or getting angry will only bring more beatings and scolding, so he Resentment and sulking in the heart, resulting in bad spleen and stomach, indigestion, and stomach pains, this is Mu Ketu.There are too many children with diarrhea and stomach pain. Is it just a problem with the digestive system, or something bad to eat? Therefore, when a child has a bad spleen and stomach, adults should reflect on themselves: hit him?Scolded him?What made him resentful?If so, correct it immediately.This is only the first step. The second step is to gradually change the child's shady personality and cultivate his self-reliance and compassion.

To educate children, you must first obey them, because children often have a strong rebellious mentality. If you don't follow them, they will fight against you. "Follow the child" does not mean spoiling the child.Some parents are very obedient to their children, fearing that the children will be wronged in the slightest, and end up making their children "little emperors" and "little ancestors".In fact, this is following the child's nature and letting it go, rather than following the child's five-element rational guidance. According to the nature of the five elements, we can know which line of people the child belongs to, which aspects of the child are prone to make mistakes, which aspects of character are easy to cultivate, and which aspects of character are not easy to cultivate.Then, we will cultivate his character that is easy to cultivate, and we will achieve the purpose of teaching without deliberately asking the child to achieve a character that is difficult for him to cultivate.

Take myself as an example.The family education I received as a child was relatively successful.I am a person of wood nature, wood can make fire, and fire governs reason.Therefore, when I was a child, my parents taught me to be sensible, and it was easy for me to accept it.I was very sensible since I was a child, and I understood the hard work of my parents, so I didn't make them angry or let them worry about me.The grown-ups all praised me for being well-behaved and not being naughty like a child from so-and-so's family.At that time, I felt that "very well-behaved" was what I should do. There was no reason for me to be ignorant or naughty.This is yang fire, yang wood produces yang fire, very successful.

But to my parents' displeasure, I wasn't very warm to people as a child.When I meet acquaintances or have guests at home, I don't really like to greet them.My parents taught me repeatedly: "You must be enthusiastic when you meet people, and you must take the initiative to say hello!" I just couldn't do it.I don't know why I can't do it.Saying hello to people belongs to Yang Jin's character, and Yang wood cannot give birth to Yang Jin, so even though my parents asked me to do so, I still couldn't do it, and they were in vain. At that time, I had a very strong little friend, who was the opposite of me in this regard. He was very enthusiastic, and he would call this uncle or aunt when he saw people from afar, talking and laughing.My parents are very envious and always ask him how his parents taught him.Thinking about it now, it turns out that this little friend is a short and thick earth-natured person who was born with gold, so it is easy to develop a Yang-jin character, and he can do it with a little touch from the adults.

Those parents who "teach their children well" just complied with the five elements of their children by accident, and more parents are failures in educating their children.They always say: "I teach him to learn well, but he just doesn't listen! Beat him and scold him, but he still doesn't listen." It seems that the fault lies entirely with the child, but they don't know that the way they educate themselves is not in line with the child's personality. This is not only a method of education for children, but also a method of health care for children.If we follow this method, we will find that the children will not only be happy, but also less sick.Children's illnesses are generally very simple, and they get sick when their temperament suddenly turns against them. Fortunately, children are simple-minded, and they can quickly forget their troubles. Therefore, although children have weak resistance, they can recover easily when they get sick. of.Some parents always teach their children a lesson, but because they are not lawful and unreasonable, the result is not only ineffective, but also makes their children sick.

I used to have a neighbor couple who both went to work, and the child was in elementary school. He was quite naughty and often made his parents angry.The mother had nothing to do with the child, and couldn't bear to beat and scold him, so she treated him by not giving him food.If the child becomes disobedient, or gets into some trouble at school, he will not be allowed to eat when he returns home, and let him sit dryly at the dining table.The child's father couldn't bear it, so he persuaded the child to be obedient, and persuaded his wife.After all, I am a mother, so I can’t be cruel. I find a step and go down, push the rice bowl in front of the child, and say, "You can eat! But you have to correct your mistakes!" , One pass counts.With tears of grievance in the child's eyes, he didn't dare to say anything, and ate his meal in humiliation, but he couldn't eat much.Later, I heard that this child is very picky eater and has a bad stomach.Why?Totally caused by the parents.The education is not right, the child is difficult to accept, and there is resentment in his heart; coupled with the lack of food, resentment adds to resentment, resentment hurts the spleen, and the functions of the spleen and stomach are weak to the extreme at this time.But at this time, let him eat again, how can the spleen and stomach bear it?Picky eaters, no digestive system diseases!Poor parents are ignorant, but they want their children to become dragons, but they hurt their children! We do not advocate reprimanding children, nor do we advocate pampering children.We advocate conforming to the five-element personality of the child and guiding them reasonably, so that the child's temperament will not be rebellious, and the disease will naturally be less.